Sending money

[capt david]

First let me say that after a year of reading this board, I have finaly begun to write, mostly email pen pals, with the intention of going to PH in June. Whenever I write I include a PH stamp to help w/expenses. So far, three weeks, I have had two positive and one negative replies. I am also in Email contact with five or six Email pals. The problem is several of these have told me of their life conditions, which leads me to believe they are quite poor. They have never even hinted at wanting me to send money to use the internet cafe. While I am by no means rich, a H/S teacher, I could certianly afford to send a couple dollars. What are your opinions and if possitive, how thanks captdavid

[capt david]

... in response to Sending money, posted by capt david on Aug 23, 2001

Ok you have given me what I  thought. Now what do you do in case of Birthday or Christmas gifts? I live in South Padre Island and could send an inexpensive teeshirt or something from Mexico. No doubt made in Tiawan by Filipinas hehe. Any way what about "token" gifts? thanks again captdavid

[Ray]

... in response to How about gifts?, posted by capt david on Aug 26, 2001

Capt,

The postage will cost you more than the gift in most cases and it will take a long time to get there (probably 2-3 months by standard parcel post surface). Some items will be subject to customs duty, so the recipient will have to pay the tax before they receive it.

If I were you, No Money, No Gifts! At least until you have it narrowed down to one special lady or fiancée. When it is appropriate to send a small gift later, send her flowers (about $15-25). Are you trying to find a compatible mate or impress them with gifts and money? I think the kind of lady you should be looking for would be more impressed with a telephone call on her birthday with you singing “happy birthday” to her, or a nice card with some personal photos enclosed.

Again, my advice is to try to keep money out of it altogether at this stage. Keep you money in your pocket and you’ll have much better luck finding that special one.

Just my $.02,

Ray

[FilipinaCupid]

... in response to Sending money, posted by capt david on Aug 23, 2001


I must say I always appreciated when a letter arrive with an IRC or a dollar inside and I would often answer these 1st as I felt an obligation.  Stamps are best as I feel IRC cost too much and often is not easy for us to use.

If letter had more than $1 it concerned me and I was hesitant to respond.  We do not want man to think he can buy our love either.  Some men seem to naturally think this way and should be avoided.  I also rarely responded if man professed love or otherwise made promises in 1st letter.  I just do not understand such words in a 1st letter and that is a BiG concern.

When you have found right woman and you "want" to send her money on a regular basis I suggest this.  Open a separate savings or free checking account with it's own ATM card.  Send her the card and tell her password by phone.  When you want to send money just deposit it in this account and she can obtain at many ATM machines in local currency.  This saves time, expense and exchange fees.  In my case the only charge is the banks $1,50 per withdrawal fee. Teri and her Dad send me money from purchases on our website regularly and this works great.  

So, I suggest not to send money until appropriate and then send carefully, OK?

Blessings,

Jean

[dd]

... in response to Sending money, posted by capt david on Aug 23, 2001

I recommend NOT to send any money until you have met your penpals in person and are familiar with their situations. If they stop writing you BECAUSE you don't send money, then better you find out now. Even small amounts ($5 to $10) can add up: some Ladies have dozends of penpals!

[Ray]

... in response to Sending money, posted by capt david on Aug 23, 2001

Hi Capt!

If I were you, I would just keep money out of the equation altogether. If you figure that computer time in the average cyber café is approximately US $.75/hour and they are probably on line for two hours average to compose & read their e-mail, they are probably spending around $25-$35/month for using e-mail. That’s a significant sum of money and I’m sure most of the ladies could use some financial help.

BUT, if you are not in a serious relationship with her, then don’t even bring up the subject of money. The good traditional ladies will feel offended if you send money, so beware of those that ask you for any kind of monetary help. A lady who scrimps and saves a significant part of her income just to correspond with you is showing the kind of positive character that you should be looking for.

But if you do decide to send some money anyway, NEVER send cash in the mail! Ask her for her bank account info and use a remittance center to transfer funds to her account. PNB is a good one and charges about US $6.00 per transfer to a PNB peso account. They will also discount the exchange rate by about 2%.

Ray

[Peaches]

... in response to Re: Sending money, posted by Ray on Aug 24, 2001

You mean PNB will exchange less 2% ?

Like,  $1= P50,   then it will be
$1=50 - .02(50) = 50 - 1 = 49?  

I usually use WU online.

[Ray]

... in response to Re: Re: Sending money...REY, posted by Peaches on Aug 25, 2001

Yes Peaches. I believe all the remittance centers do it. I think they set their daily exchange rate by checking the official opening rate and cutting it by 2%. That's the way it usually works out. I've seen some remittance centers discount the rate a lot more than that also.

What's WU online? I never heard of it before. Do you have a URL for their Web site?

Thanks,

Ray

[Peaches]

... in response to Yes, posted by Ray on Aug 25, 2001

Rey,

It's Western Union  and I pay online. It's cheaper in the
net than going to a designated stablishment in your
area.

Peaches

[Ray]

... in response to Re: Yes...Rey, posted by Peaches on Aug 26, 2001

Hey Peaches,

How much does Western Union charge for an on-line transfer and if you use a credit card, does the card company charge you a cash advance fee?

Also, does the recipient have a choice of picking up the money in pesos or dollars?

Thanks,

Ray

[Bear]

... in response to Sending money, posted by capt david on Aug 23, 2001

Nah.  If you listen to their sob stories and send money it only gets worse.  Wonder why they are telling you about all the sad things in their lives?  Maybe a dollar to cover postage.  The right ones won't accept money and you'll have to force it on them like I did mine.  Once I became engaged I bought my finacee a cell phone and gave her money for chatting.  The right one or two $10 to chat with but may sure its you she's chatting with and not someone else or using the money for anything else.

Money is a big issue with these people.  They are very impoverished and even if your penpals don't intend to use/take advantage of someone in her family might.  Any sign of your willingness to give/send money might/will esculate the request for more.  Even once married $150-200 is twice what a family would need to live on out of the manila or Cebu areas.

Bear