Did this Cali girl really love ?

[charlieRSJ]

... in response to Actual Age vs. Apparent Age, posted by DallasSteve2 on Jan 19, 2004

I had no problem with garsters logic Steve..heck,Im 45 myself but i look..44

[DallasSteve2]

... in response to Re: Actual Age vs. Apparent Age, posted by charlieRSJ on Jan 20, 2004

Thanks for coming out of lurk mode for that one.

Steve

[Pete E]

... in response to Did this Cali girl really love ?, posted by garster7 on Jan 19, 2004

I believe what was told to me after a lukewarm dissatisfying marriage to my wife.
"If you wonder if they love you,they do not."
I can't believe it even took a ditsy marriage counsoler a couple oy years to figure it out.My wife was an expert at denial,and of course I wanted to believe her when see said she loved me,but I really knew better all along.

Pete

[mar33]

... in response to Did this Cali girl really love ?, posted by garster7 on Jan 19, 2004

garster 7,
      It seems you have not had a lot of dating experience in the past. I reccomend you get some before you ever think of buying a plane ticket to any foreign country. Otherwise, you will be prime target for many women who think gringos are easy prey(and apparently you are).
   Yes, action speak louder than words and YOU are not willing to see that. Many women will tell you what you want to hear. Though you may think you have little to offer,and she can certainly get more from someone else, understand it takes effort to find another sucker. You are right there and willing, therefore she will take what she can.
    Calipro had once said to give someone enough rope and see if they hang  themselves . If they prove to you they are sincere great. If not, get rid of them or understand you are not in a serious relationship.
   Also, I agree you will not have to convince a woman who loves you to have sex with you. Heck!! you do not even have to convince one that does not love you. In this day and age, most women will sleep with a man she is sexually attracted to without the love unless she is a virgin.
    This may be hard to take, but not only is she not in love with you. She is not sexually attracted to you. When that happens you have absolutely no chance in he11 to make it work.
   Sorry to be so blunt. Again, please take time to date and understand what women are about. Also, take a good look in the mirror and see what you can do to improve yourself. Foreign women are very picky about grooming and clothing.If there is anything wrong with the teeth, fix them.Otherwise no  woman will not have the desire to kiss you. Make sure you are up to par, especially if you plan to start travelling.Otherwise, though you will get girls  their motives will be questionable.

[littlebhuddha]

... in response to Did this Cali girl really love ?, posted by garster7 on Jan 19, 2004

Marrying an illegal alien will not get her a green card. If she was here illegally at the time of the marriage the I-130 would never be approved. Marrying an illegal here is asking for a bucket of trouble. If this guy actually did what he says he would have found out real fast that it wouldn't work. I agree with Calipro. That ain't limberger you smellin"!!!

[Calipro]

... in response to Did this Cali girl really love ?, posted by garster7 on Jan 19, 2004

Troll !!!!

Your story is really hard to believe. But if it is true the real question is weather you tried to black mail her into having sex with you (not if she really loved you!). We already know the answer to that one.

[wizard]

... in response to Did this Cali girl really love ?, posted by garster7 on Jan 19, 2004

n/t

[pablo]

... in response to I smell a troll... n/t, posted by wizard on Jan 19, 2004

[This message has been edited by pablo]

I thought the same thing Wiz when reading garster's story but do ya think Patrick activates accounts for LuLu* to start posting that quick?  I guess time will tell.  

In the meantime...

JimC, take point, Burbuja on the right flank, Sparhard cover the left flank, and who wants to take up the rear, Big B?  Lock and load troops.   ;-)

---

*Posted by: LuAnn on January 16, 2004 04:19 PM (On that amptoons site)

Hey, guess what? Our old friend jackoftrades posts on planet-love, latin board. Say, lets all register there and troll on all three boards - latin, asian and east europeon (russian). Get em all riled up!

[garster7]

... in response to Re: I smell a troll... n/t, posted by pablo on Jan 19, 2004

For the last time I am not a troll why would I risk telling a story like this I knew what I would get for it plus I could make up a much better story then the one I have told. Also she or I knew when we got married that she could not get her citizenship we found that out a few weeks later, at that point we talked about getting an annulment. She knew I was nervous about being married to her and I was afraid I would get cought or fined she was well aware of my worries. One time she did say "lets get an annulment we will go out then eventually get married for real" sort of under her breath, but I didnt beleive her and never asked her about it again, I regret not doing that. The real thing about this is that we were both afraid to love and my lack of self-esteem could make me beleive I could only get this girl if I was married to her that I could not keep her on my own merit. The fact is I could have kept her at least as a girlfriend she gave me plenty of oportunities to backout, but I would keep changing my mind. The point was I didnt act like a man around her I let her dictate what as up and eventually she just got tired of my indecisiveness and moved on. She was defintly the kind of woman who needed a strong man to take "care of her" and tell her whats up. Since I never got to know her that well, who knows. She was well aware I was lonley and hadnt been involved in a while she kept on saying "she would take care of me", but I kept on saying I dont need a mother. As I look back on it now I should have stayed just her friend never married her, and get to know her and see what kind of girl she was and take it from there to she if she was worthy enough to be with me instead of taking the opposite approach. And I didnt marry her for sex I wanted much more then that.

[Cali vet]

... in response to Did this Cali girl really love ?, posted by garster7 on Jan 19, 2004

.

[CaliAdvisor]

... in response to Did this Cali girl really love ?, posted by garster7 on Jan 19, 2004

I will try not to bash you my friend. All these guys who are bashing you would have probably done the same thing. At least you had a friendship with this girl, most of them just marry women that they cant even communicate with beyond a 4th grade level because neither speaks their respective language. So take everything they tell you with a grain of salt. The one comment I do have to make has to do with this sentence that you wrote:

"I think she just found someone else to give her what she wanted and other times i think she really wanted a relationship with me and i didnt give it time to develop."

Don't fool yourself my friend. She did not want anything to do with you on a romantic level. If a latina is interested in you romantically, they will usually let you know pretty rapidly. So don't beat yourself up thinking you made some mistake, the fact of the matter is she sis not like you in that way.

[greg]

... in response to Re: Did this Cali girl really love ?, posted by CaliAdvisor on Jan 19, 2004

:O)

[DallasSteve2]

... in response to Re: Did this Cali girl really love ?, posted by CaliAdvisor on Jan 19, 2004

Aaron

You wrote:

"All these guys who are bashing you would have probably done the same thing."

Wrong again.  But don't worry.  Someday the law of averages will catch up and you will say something correct besides your aarogant blather about how you can get girls in Colombia and not marry them.  Who can't?

When I met my ex she said she would marry me but she wouldn't have sexual relations with me until we were married (and she was in the US).  I said Adios.  Then she called me back and we consumated the deal.  I'm not so desperate (and foolish) that I would bring her here on the hope that I'd get something later.

I also am fluent in Spanish.

Steve

[CaliAdvisor]

... in response to And wrong again, posted by DallasSteve2 on Jan 19, 2004

Yeah I am sure your real fluent DallasSteve. Then why all the miscomunication between you and your wife. It seems like every second you are on this board complaining about how your wife is completely uncapable of living in the developed world. Maybe you just dont know how to explain things to her in spanish.

[Fuzzyone]

... in response to Re: And wrong again, posted by CaliAdvisor on Jan 20, 2004

Now you got me thinking... maybe that is what happened to my ex-
wife. Only problem was she could speak very good english but still could
not understand. Oh well thank god I got you around to tell us what
boobs we are....