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Author Topic: Latinos generally avoid women with children ?  (Read 30342 times)
Kiltboy1
Guest
« Reply #15 on: December 26, 2003, 05:00:00 AM »
... in response to Re: Re: Leaving Colombia with children, posted by DallasSteve2 on Dec 26, 2003

Steve

That is a good question. Based on what i know abut the judicial system in Colombia , i think that even if the mother has full custody, if the father wants to challenge the custody, he can do so. It may change in the future, but my wife went to court in Cali to try to gain full  custody and the judge almost took the boy away from her total because she wanted to come here to the states. The father is the worst type of man you can imagine and i cannot even write to you some of the things this guy has done because i might get BANNED from the forum. Any sane judge would have given her custody and put this guy in jail , but not in Colombia. The man still is king there and i do not see it changing much when it comes to custody issues if he father aks the judge to rule.

Andy
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NightRaven
Guest
« Reply #16 on: December 26, 2003, 05:00:00 AM »
... in response to Leaving Colombia with children, posted by DallasSteve2 on Dec 25, 2003

"My wife does not have the legal right to take her children out of Colombia without his permission"
Scary question but I gotta ask. Is said permission revocable?
If so could a mother and husband for that matter. Go home to visit and suddenly find themselves the subject(s) of warrants etc. or be in a situation where the child  can not go back to visit due to legal problems?
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Kiltboy1
Guest
« Reply #17 on: December 26, 2003, 05:00:00 AM »
... in response to Re: Leaving Colombia with children, posted by NightRaven on Dec 26, 2003

Nightraven

The answer to your question is YES.

If he father files what is called a "DEMANDA" , A JUDGE CAN AD WILL GRANT CUSTODY, ABSENTE , TO THE FATHER . If the mother or child comes back into the country, they will be arrested and the child taken away to the father. It is a scary thought , but one you need to investigate very well before you marry. I did not know any better and it has destroyed my marriage.

Andy
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DallasSteve2
Guest
« Reply #18 on: December 26, 2003, 05:00:00 AM »
... in response to Re: Leaving Colombia with children, posted by NightRaven on Dec 26, 2003

NightRaven

I'm no expert in Colombian law, but it's my understanding that if the father signs the permission it is not revocable, but it is for a limited period of time, something like 60 days.  If the permission is older than that (and it has to be certified by someone official like a notary) they won't let her leave the country with the children.

It's also my understanding that if she has "la patria" it is permanent and she can come and go as she pleases.  If you really want to be sure (or as sure as is practical) you would need to talk to a Colombian attorney.  Even then, I've talked to some attorneys here in the US who know less about some laws than I do because I actually took the time to read the law.  Some lawyers don't like to waste their time with those messy details.

So, if the mother (who does not have "la patria") returns to Colombia with the children after 60 days she would need to get a new permission from the father or the children would not be able to leave.  That's really not a bad law, but it does make life difficult for some of us.  If I had a son (or daughter) with a Colombiana I wouldn't be real happy if the law would let her leave the US with him without my permission and perhaps never return.

Steve
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NightRaven
Guest
« Reply #19 on: December 26, 2003, 05:00:00 AM »
... in response to Re: Re: Leaving Colombia with children, posted by DallasSteve2 on Dec 26, 2003

"If you really want to be sure (or as sure as is practical) you would need to talk to a Colombian attorney."
Just one? Never! More like 3 or 4. As your post indicates, paid help is not the one with their life in the fire if they are wrong.
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DallasSteve2
Guest
« Reply #20 on: December 26, 2003, 05:00:00 AM »
... in response to Re: Re: Re: Leaving Colombia with childr..., posted by NightRaven on Dec 26, 2003

If you want something done right....ah, you know the rest.

Steve
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NightRaven
Guest
« Reply #21 on: December 26, 2003, 05:00:00 AM »
... in response to True That!, posted by DallasSteve2 on Dec 26, 2003

Camel = A horse designed by a commitee.
2 humped camel = Arctic version designed by gov. panel of experts who have never seen snow in real life.
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Ricardo
Guest
« Reply #22 on: December 25, 2003, 05:00:00 AM »
... in response to Leaving Colombia with children, posted by DallasSteve2 on Dec 25, 2003

The scenario you mentioned just keeps me a little "gun-shy" of dealing with latina/children!  I'm not looking to hook up with such a latina - however.... if one comes along, she'd have to be .... well, over-the-top special, mature and sweet.
Thanks for sharing your personal experience...
Ricardo
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david hagar
Guest
« Reply #23 on: December 25, 2003, 05:00:00 AM »
... in response to Latinos generally avoid women with child..., posted by Ricardo on Dec 24, 2003

I have a different viewpoint from you gentleman.  I have been widowed for about 10 years and was left with 2 teenage children to raise. The daughter graduated from college last Saturday with a degree in accounting. I did not marry during this time, because I did not want any woman coming between myself and my children at this age. Now, I am ready to find that very special lady,but I will not accept a woman who has had children out of wedlock or divorced from her husband. If she is widowed, I would could consider her, because this is Biblical.  But only if she is widowed, would  I consider her.  Hope that every one has a very Merry Christmas and that all her hopes and dreams come true the coming year.

God Bless

Beattledog
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Ricardo
Guest
« Reply #24 on: December 25, 2003, 05:00:00 AM »
... in response to Re: Latinos generally avoid women with c..., posted by david hagar on Dec 25, 2003

It's very interesting, by the way - how has been your experience with latinas and 'Biblical' guidelines.... I see that they are not too inclined that way, ie. they more or less try to follow the church's teachings, but then again.... reality bites!
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DallasSteve2
Guest
« Reply #25 on: December 25, 2003, 05:00:00 AM »
... in response to Re: Latinos generally avoid women with c..., posted by david hagar on Dec 25, 2003

To David and anyone else:

I have a sincere question about "Biblical" marriage (having studied this myself).

If the woman was divorced because her husband left her or was unfaithful to her could you "Biblically" marry her.  A strict reading of the scriptures might lead someone to conclude that you cannot.  In all good faith I have to disagree.

I also find it amusing that although I have been divorced I can still get married in the Roman Catholic Church because I have never been married in that Church.

Merry Christmas.

Steve
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Ken2
Guest
« Reply #26 on: December 26, 2003, 05:00:00 AM »
... in response to Biblical marriage, posted by DallasSteve2 on Dec 25, 2003

Tough subject.  Biblically you/she could re-marry if your spouse abandonded you or cheated on you.  This was/will be my justification when I marry again.  She left me and split to Virginia.  She never indicated she wanted to return, so I had the union ANNULLED.   Biblically she, my ex, cannot remarry until I die.

ken
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Cali vet
Guest
« Reply #27 on: December 25, 2003, 05:00:00 AM »
... in response to Latinos generally avoid women with child..., posted by Ricardo on Dec 24, 2003

My wife has a niece who just turned eighteen and has a five month old baby. She says that even at that tender age the girl has a snowball's chance in hell of finding a Colombian man who will marry her. It just doesn't happen.
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buster40
Guest
« Reply #28 on: December 25, 2003, 05:00:00 AM »
... in response to Snowball's Chance, posted by Cali vet on Dec 25, 2003

There's a reason why the cubs are the first to go when a male lion takes over a pride.....food for thought.
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Bueller
Guest
« Reply #29 on: December 25, 2003, 05:00:00 AM »
... in response to Snowball's Chance, posted by Cali vet on Dec 25, 2003

[This message has been edited by Bueller]

 
 CV (and others), why do you think that is?

  I posted this week on LWL my recent experience with a brasileira with a young child. My perspective until now has been that I can work with a child, that the mother and I can be a team and turn a less-than-perfect situation around into something good. I'm starting to get the idea, though, that the reality is: no good deed shall go unpunished. I'm ready to swear off women with children, not because of the children, but because of the mindset of most single mothers. As illogical as it seems to me, their perspective in general would not be that I am the good guy who caught the fumble and ran it into the end zone; instead I would always be the interloper, the third wheel, the anal-retentive bad guy who keeps impeding the immediate happiness and gratification of her (emphasis on "her") little darling.  

 So do you think a colombiano wouldn't take on this sort of situation because of selfishness, or because he instinctively knows what I'm just now starting to figure out?
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