Hello from Bogota #5

[Mark33]

... in response to Re: Re: Hello from Bogota #5, posted by Calipro on Jun 17, 2003

Calipro,
    Some of the men in search of older ladies are not looking for desperate. They are looking for a person who has lived life and understand what they seek. From your point of view marrying a beautiful young girl proves that she is not desperate and chose because you are the best of her options,and she is attracted to you..
  Funny, every single age-gap relationship I have seen with foreign women do not seem that way to me. It seems the young girls took their first oppurtunity to leave, thinking they can trade up once they get to the states. Be she Russian, Latin,or whatever.
 I recently spoke to a Greek store owner who has just gotten married to a 20 year old Greek girl from back home. The wife is gorgeous beyond belief. The guy is ugly,smelly and fat and old. I'm sure there is a lot of attraction on her part:)You can tell by the look on her face that this girl is not too happy. But I guess he was her best option because he had money.Love does not ususally come into play, but sometimes it does.
  I am involved with a Filipina. many of her friends are engaged to much older men. I always thought they liked older men. That is what they say,and the older American men swear by it. To my suprise, while I was there. Many of her friends who are engaged asked me if I knew other YOUNG American men who are looking to get married. One of the girls described the man she was going to marry as a man who looked like he was carrying 2 babies.She was 18. He is in his 50's.
     Other men my age and younger have also said they were bombarded with friends asking if they knew young men closer to their age. They keep telling my fiance that she is so lucky I am young.
  Calipro,any guy can get a young hot foreign girl.Do you know ANYONE who has kept her for more than a brief time?
 I have dated girls as young as 19(in the States) recently, but never again.      
  By the way, have you forgotten about Indel King? He  was the 40+ short bald,fat creepy guy who eventually killed his tall blonde 18 year old Russian wife. That was the 2nd young foreign wife he had. I guess he is was such hot stuff the teens could'nt stay away:)
  Some of the young girls are pretty desperate and will marry anyone in order to come to the States. They understand they sacrifice 2 years to get what they want. They will still be young by the time those 2 years are up.

[Calipro]

... in response to Re: Re: Re: Hello from Bogota #5, posted by Mark33 on Jun 17, 2003

Sure, I know of relationships that have a 20 or  more year age gap and they have lasted more than a short time. I even know of an american couple with a twenty plus year age difference and they have been married 17+ years.

But the reality of the situation is most of the relationships I am aware of don't last a life time no matter what the age difference is. Hell, my dad is 62 and he picked up his illegal mexican girl friend from the circle K down the street. It cost him all of $1600 for the coyote. He met her in mexico when he was traveling with my brother. They got a long great and he went down to see her a couple more times. He is 62 and she is 20 and when I saw them yesterday they both seemed very happy.

I am not going to argue the point that a relationship with an older women on average probably will last longer than a relationship with a younger women. All I am saying is that doesn't make them more sincere  just because they will have fewer oportunities to leave you.

I know there are guys out there that think I only date very young women and that may be the case. But the fact of the matter is when I go to a marriage agency and look at the books I never look at how old the women is. I just look for someone I am attracted to and more often then not they are young. I have to be sexually attracted to the women and her to me or what is the point of going any further. I am not one of those guys that go down to Cali and try to impress women with pictures of my house and my car, etc. etc.. They have to like me for who I am and I have to like them for who they are and that is all that is really requiered in my opinion.

[Mark33]

... in response to Re: Re: Re: Re: Hello from Bogota #5, posted by Calipro on Jun 17, 2003

They have to like you for who you are? They are attracted to you for what you can do for them. Did you not say your 1st Cali wife was in a bad situation at home,and you were the first man to apply for a k-1? Your second latina wife had a boyfriend she was still in love with. But used you to fulfill her purposes?
 If a man is leary of bringing his foreign wife to the U.S. because he fears she will change or leave,deep down inside he understands it is not him she truly wants.Just what he can give her. Most younger women do not know what they really want,and neither did we at that age.
  Also, congrats to your dad. But is he not involved with a woman who was in a desperate situation? Just because she is young does not mean she was not desperate. Poverty makes people very desperate.As I said before, I met many foreign girls engaged to older men. Almost all wanted to know if there was a younger man available for them.
  Calipro, I would rather the woman I am involved with be in love with me. I do not need to play savior. You seem to think a man with an older woman is getting one who stays because she has no other choice. A good looking girl 30+ will have tons of oppurtunity to meet men in this country also. Not all men want teenagers. All she would have to do is put a profile out on Yahoo and she would be bombarded.Or go to nice clubs and restaurants.So it is not a given she will stay.
  By the way, why do you think a man is settling if he is not with a very young woman. To each his own. Many people have realized all men have different taste,and made on bundle$$$$$$$ on that fact. There are websites out there for men who like fat women, chunky women,latin women,ugly women,blond,tall,short,Asian,black. There are even ones for men who love very old women.Also ones for men who like teens. All men are different.
 Just because a man wants an equal partner, who he feels confident will be by his side through thick and thin.One he feels is proud of him, one he can consider his best friend,and one he sees as beautiful does not make him insecure. In fact he is more secure than the man who wants a trophy.
       

[pablo]

... in response to Re: Re: Hello from Bogota #5, posted by Calipro on Jun 17, 2003

Not time wasting but trying to do him a favor.  I mean how could an American guy find a sweet beautiful AW with a 15+ age difference.  Gringas won't give older guys the time of day.  It's an easy mindset to allow yourself into and it needs to be rethought and challenged when visiting a LA country.  

I remember my first trip and being so indoctrinated into our dating culture I could not believe some sweet sensitive beautiful Latina half my age would be interested in me.  After questioning one such latina about the age difference and if it was a problem for her she looked at me puzzled and said "What is your problem, my last Colombian boyfriend was older than you!"  Not all of the ladies want big age differences there but many don't mind and some even prefer it.

Age should be considered, along with interests, goals and maturity.  Remember the adage:  Age is mind over matter, if you don't mind...it doesn't matter.

I for one would rather be with a sweet mid 20 or 30 rather than a late 30 or 40 something lady.  

[Mark33]

... in response to Re: Re: Re: Hello from Bogota #5, posted by pablo on Jun 17, 2003

Pablo, you are right. Some ladies like a big age difference. IF you are a good-looking guy who is fit for his age and in his 40's or 50's. All women will always be attracted to you. AW or otherwise.I know men in their 40's and 50's in the states who would laugh if they heard that young 20's and 30's women were not attracted to them. They get young girls all the time. But if you are not in shape,and not too attractive, there are fewer young ladies who will be sincere especially when you are in a foreign country.
   I had once read that a good marriage consists of both parties thinking they could not have done better in a life partner. If a young woman is married to an older man,and sincerly thinks that in every department she could not have done better, that is great. If she has a strong physical attraction and thinks you are the hottest thing since sliced bread. That is great!
 But if she just loves you because of what you provide her, that is not good. Because young women will wlways want the man who makes her heart beat faster,and the one who turns her on. Otherwise,she will be gone soon.

[beenthere]

... in response to Re: Re: Re: Re: Hello from Bogota #5, posted by Mark33 on Jun 17, 2003

Mark,
Just wanted to say I appreciate your posts.  Very well thought out, and make alot of sense!!!
Good Luck!!

[Michael B]

... in response to Hello from Bogota #5, posted by DOMINGUIN on Jun 16, 2003

Read 'em like a book, can't you? (I mean that in a good way). Yeah, anybody who shows up for the date is worth a lunch, but that sugar daddy business got to go...you done good.