I've been on this site a total of 4 days and while attempting to provide some insight and information to guys looking for a Latin wife I've already brought out the critics.

My email is posted for those who have questions. I don't have all the answers but I'll help where I can.

I hope you all can find the happiness that I have found.
Best of luck to you all and I am outahere!

Now I realize that my novia is correct: I .... AM....  a Papi Chulo

On my first and second trips wife searching, to Cartagena and Cali respectively, I used a list of questions I developed to assess mutual compatibility.  It was not nearly so long as the one offered here, just 6 or 7 questions.  I memorized them in Spanish so I wouldn't need to have paper in front of me and I offered my own answers before asking hers. I relied on her answers to spur more follow up questions and on her to ask follow up questions of me.  Those experiences and the brief relationship that I developed with a calena from my second trip caused me to drastically revise the questions approach.

As many men have observed, women seem to prefer confident men.  Asking questions and waiting for answers puts the initiative and leadership of the encounter with her.  It is her answers that drive the interaction between the two of you.  What I have done subsequently with more impressive results (in terms of Latinas viewing me as confident and capable of leadership) is state my answers to the questions I would have asked.  I essentially explain in 4 or 5 minutes who I am, what my values are, and what I am looking for in a relationship.  I then ask her how closely (or not) what I described fits with the type of man she is looking for.  That leads to her responding to what I said and answering the "list of questions" without my having specifically asked them.  This method leaves the initiative and leadership of the encounter with the man since the woman is reacting to the man's statements.  The man's statements that now drive the interaction during the encounter.

This method has revealed glaring incompatibilities almost immediately (which for me have usually been religious in nature and sometimes related to the desired number of children).   But it has always left the woman with a very good impression of me and led to continued communication as friends several times.

I agree with those who discourage asking a list of questions as in a job interview.  But a list of answers that you need to assess compatibility is an excellent place to start to develop an image to present to the ladies.

Thanks for your input while you were here, Wally.  Good luck in life.

Very few of the women I have met in person were insincere with me.  A few women I corresponded with only through letters DID just give a song and dance and them ask for money.  My motive for giving lots of details up front is to deflect some of the distrust that many Latinas have for men in general.  Not being secretive about oneself helps show that a man is less likely to cheat or lie.  (Or so I hope!)  The change in body language that some women showed 10 minutes into our initial meeting was remarkable and very encouraging.

On that note, I am finding that talking about your family, ie. parents, siblings, aunts, uncles, nieces, and nephews, breaks a tremendous amount of ice very quickly.  I am currently trying to collect pictures and information of my extended family to show a lady when the time is appropriate.  Women have brought pictures of their family to meetings with me.  I had a long talk with the mother of my former lady friend in which she told me the history of their family.

I haven't seen anybody more negative on this board than you.  Calling people names like Bozo, Sigmond, and pathetic psychoanalytical intellects qualifies as negative in my book.  Saying things like "you get a life" is negative and childish.  (And those are just examples from this thread)

You also told me I was lying when I said my K1 visa was approved in less than 4 weeks.  I'm still waiting for you to put money on that one.

You might also want to address the board moderator as Patrick next time.  

Steve