Frequency...

[wizard]

... in response to Re: What!!!, posted by Celt on Dec 20, 2002

apologies... After analyzing my response and re-reading your post, I guess I did go a little over the top...

When I first read your post it hit a nerve... Why you ask, because I was in a LTR with an AW that in the early stages of the relationship there was much chemistry.. Everything was perfect... We both made vast life changes, moved to a different city and started a new life... Slowly at first, then more rapidly it became evident that we didnt't like each other as people... It finally ended badly after we had both turned our lives upside down...

Couple that with the facts of how we have to carry on long distance relationships with women from LA, where we are thrust into very similar circumstances and I popped... You have to go with chemistry at first but I don't want to bet the farm on chemistry alone... Been there, done that...

When I read your post, the message I got was find someone that you have chemistry with, then go for it... Like Patrick said, two people can read the same text and get two separate meanings...

Guess a little baggage slipped out from the past... Damn, I thought I checked all my bags...

Didn't mean to gnaw on ya too hard...

wizard

[Celt]

... in response to My humble, posted by wizard on Dec 20, 2002

Wizard,

(In theory), tis the season of good will and spiked egg nog.

No one in this forum has a formula for happiness and success
in this world. I try to approach it all with a big gulp of
humility. I have written a few posts against those who got
incredibly lucky in Colombia, and then tried to package
their luck either as effortless success, or some reproducable
formula like those sold at real estate seminars.

In truth, I was one of those lucky ones. I met my beloved
in Cali, and will marry her on Christmas day. If I am
successful, and enjoy a long life of happiness with her,
it will be the result of patience, hard work, and luck. A wise
friend said to me once, "A good marriage is one where
passion turns to love, and love turns to tenderness". I
hope we are together long enough for this evolution to take
place. I believe truly that we will.

I do not believe, however, that my fortune so far is the
result of some charm or savior faire that I possess, and
others do not. In the "Unbearable Lightness of Being",
Milan Kundera writes about the "seven fortuities" that
brought the couple together. My case is similar, and to
those fortuities belong the wedding day toasts, as much as
any effort on my part to woo her.

Sometimes the gloating on this forum, even when under cloak
of genial advice-giving, is unbearable. The crude character
attacks are worse, but this is the season of good will.

I wish you much happiness, success, and good luck this year.

Celt

[Patrick]

... in response to What!!!, posted by wizard on Dec 19, 2002

I interpreted his post as meaning that you can't force something to be there when it isn't.  If you don't click with a woman, no amount of visiting will make it work.  If it is working, you'll want to spend as much time as possible together and then visiting more often makes sense.

It's sometimes hard to interpret a written messages.  We can all read something different "between the lines."

[wizard]

... in response to Between the lines, posted by Patrick on Dec 19, 2002

I re-read Celt's post and still didn't read it that way Patrick...

I guess I read potato and you read patata...

No one would pursue a relationship with someone where there was no chemistry... But once you find someone, you want to spend as much time as possible with them... Hopefully forever...

I guess I was just looking for barkpark numbers on how often guys travel to LA...

wizard

[pablo]

... in response to Re: Between the lines, posted by wizard on Dec 19, 2002

Hi Wizard,

Although I have not had the pleasure to meet you yet, let me say first that I have really enjoyed your posts.  You went down to LAI's Thanksgiving tour when I did the Halloween one.  Reading your posts brought back nice memories of the times that I've been in Bogotá.

I also would like to say congratulations on your finding your novia and her finding you.  I actually went out on a date with her and thought she is a beautiful and sincere lady.  You got a keeper there Wizard.

Regarding your post and the frequency about going down south…I have not found "the" lady yet but I think if a couple makes a commitment like you have with your novia, then go as often as you can, whether that be every two weeks like Bruce is able, or every few months like you can.  Pity the guy who can only go once a year or once every two years.  I envy the guy who can spend a lot of time there.  

You are probably doing this already but if you aren't able to make it for another three months I would encourage you to use Messenger, either Yahoo or MSN to communicate daily or as often as possible to keep things going.  Your novia understands a lot of English which is a huge plus in your favor.  The phone calls are good, email helpful, but messenger will help you and her keep and stay closer.  It will I think, also solidify the relationship more than the occasional call and email and you will discover more about her and faster.  You can even have fairly good voice conversations using these programs.

The duration between your trips might work to your advantage, showing you both that if the relationship stands the test of time with the necessary effort and time cultivating it in between the visits...then hey, that’s a good sign and will help you both in the long run.  Man, I feel for ya though, having met your sweetheart and you not being able to be with her more.  

I feel like I want to move to one of these LA countries I miss it so much.  Has anyone just bagged it for six months to a year and just decided to move there?  What an advantage over the weekend to week(s) visits most of us can attempt to do in the search for a lovely Latina wife.

Hope to see ya down there one day when you are visiting.

Regards

[wizard]

... in response to Re: Re: Between the lines, posted by pablo on Dec 20, 2002

[This message has been edited by wizard]

Thanks Pablo...

Yeah, she is a vey special lady... That's why I don't want to let the interest level drop... Her's or mine... The only way to do that is to stay in contact... We talk on the phone many times a week and email daily... Messenger services really are not an option as like most ladies in LA, she doesn't have her own PC and has to use the Internet Cafes... Her work schedule is nuts too, making it more difficult...

I can arranage my schedule to be in LA every 3 - 4 weeks... But once you meet the "one", that doesn't seem to be enough... I now understand why some guys jump the gun, pop the question and get married quickly... Even though I'm optimistic, I'm a realist too...

Thanks for the kind words...

wizard

[markxport]

... in response to Re: Re: Re: Between the lines, posted by wizard on Dec 20, 2002

We've never met, but glad to hear that you've found a special lady.  It seems like your doing everything you can to make it work, short of moving there.  Sincerely hope it works out for the two of you!
Take care,

Mark

[wizard]

... in response to Re: Re: Re: Re: Between the lines, posted by markxport on Dec 20, 2002

Thanks for the kind words Mark...

Feliz Navidad y buena suerte...

wizard