School

[Pete]

... in response to Re: Does it really matter?, posted by Westerngrrl on Jan 23, 2001

You're pre-disposed about a person's status..."I could
never date him...he's from a trailer park...I know he
looks like Freddie Prinze Jr. and he's the nicest guy in
the world and owns his own internet startup
(Money!)....but...he's still beneath me....What would I tell
my friends? "  I just hope as you grow older, you
become a little wiser and little more open-minded...God
knows, how much I've changed from 21 to 27. Of
course, this all depends on your individual experiences.
Whatever, different strokes for different folks....you're
going to think what you want no matter what anyone
says.

[Westerngrrl]

... in response to That's your problem right there., posted by Pete on Jan 23, 2001

There's something called reputation.  Would someone from the Royal Family in any country marry someone from a trailer park?

[Andy(Original)]

... in response to Re: That's your problem right there., posted by Westerngrrl on Jan 23, 2001

Actually yes!

In most monarchies the members of the royal family are not allowed to marry without the consent of the king/Queen and the parliament. The parliament usually judges the girl/boyfriend and will investigate his/her entire family. If he/she can become a burden to the prince/princess in the future the parliament will usually disaprove of the engagement.

That said, there are many occurences of something similar... Before the second world war, the british king had to abdicate so that he could marry an american divorcee. The Norwegian crownprince is engaged to a woman with a child and a bad reputation... A danish prince was married to a secretary from Hong-Kong. Indeed his mother the danish queen was married to a french guy who's grandfather bought a title from the french government, and who was low middle class. We all know about the Princess Diana and Fergie...

Point is...Marrying below Your class is a common occurrence...And it seems that some people are even marrying for love.

regards,

[Westerngrrl]

... in response to It really depends, posted by Andy(Original) on Jan 24, 2001

But they're not too much below==below to a point that they don't understand the lifestyle at all-  Once you've reached middle-middle class, you're pretty much ok.

[Lori]

... in response to Re: That's your problem right there., posted by Westerngrrl on Jan 23, 2001

hmmm...I have a feeling your first husband will be some rich snob who your friends just adore and your family approves of. Hopefully your second husband will be someone your heart sought out.
You know my mother does not approve of my choice to marry a man from another country. But, I have to make the choice of what is good for me, and good for my heart. I married the man my friendsand family approved of, all it got me was a divorce.

[Pete]

... in response to Re: That's your problem right there., posted by Westerngrrl on Jan 23, 2001

You're not from the royal family (are you?) and if you
truly cared about that person, it wouldn't matter. If you're
family and friends are true friends, then they will
support you no matter what, not citicize or belittle you for
doing what makes you happy.  If they don't agree, then
the best you can do is inform and tell them how much
that person means to you, trailer trash or not. If they still
condemn you for it, then this is where you're strength as
an individual comes into play. Are you strong enough to
stand on your own two feet and say "Look....I don't care
where he's from...he's a good person and I love him.
End of story." Or, do you say "Well, my friends and
family think you're trailer trash and I can't see you
anymore." (which is pretty lame, imo).

I just thought of something....you should go rent that
movie "Valley Girl" with Nicholas Cage and Deborah
Foreman.  It's basically about  a valley girl who meets
this punk rocker from Hollywood (the total opposite of
the Valley) and falls for him but her friends and cheating
ex-bf - the rich, cleancut preppie types - make her feel
bad about it and about losing her rep, etc.  So she has
to decide who she wants...etc. It's very similar to the
theme of this thread.

[Westerngrrl]

... in response to Re: Re: That's your problem right there., posted by Pete on Jan 23, 2001

No, I'm not from the British Royal Family.  And yes, my family may very well support me (though likely reluctantly), but what about him and his family?  He's going to have to come to some of my alum events, especially if I were to send my future children to the same school.  Would he feel comfortable?  And if he does, would his relatives?   If we were to have my wedding reception at let's say a yacht club, would his trailer park grandmother feel comfortable there?

[Pete]

... in response to Re: Re: Re: That's your problem right th..., posted by Westerngrrl on Jan 23, 2001

No but if they had a shred of common sense, they
would either politely refuse to go to your yacht club party
(because they themselves realized they might not fit
in...or they would meekly accept how you really looked
down your nose at them).  If they did go, who knows...it
could be like a National Lampoon Vacation
movie...hahahah.

The irony of this whole conversation is that you may
never get married at all in spite of your surety about it. I
just hope if you do, it's because you love the person
and not simply to fit your master plan.  And, like I said
before, I hope you broaden your views as you grow
older...karma will come back to haunt ya

[Dave H]

... in response to Re: Re: Re: That's your problem right th..., posted by Westerngrrl on Jan 23, 2001

Actually Westerngrrl,

I am descended from royalty (English, Scottish, Irish, French, Italian, and Scandinavian) as are probably many people on this board. The world used to be a very small place. Though I don't live in a castle, I have relatives that do. One of my cousins (distant) is the Premiere Duke of Scotland and keeper of the Crown Jewels. Another, a Duke in Ireland. I still talk to you and I am no better, nor are my cousins. They treat everyone with respect. One weekend I may be hanging out at a friend's place in a trailer park, the next at Madonna's (she sold her FL house recently). My fiancee is very poor and I wouldn't trade her for all the tea in China or any of the girls at your country club.

Manners do not come with wealth.

Dave H.

[Dave H]

... in response to Actually..., posted by Dave H on Jan 23, 2001

Madonna has money, expensive toys, now a "British" accent, but no class. I have seen more class in trailer parks and the slums of Butuan.

Dave H.

[Westerngrrl]

... in response to PS, posted by Dave H on Jan 23, 2001

Don't forget her boytoy of a husband :-) BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

[Dave H]

... in response to Re: PS, posted by Westerngrrl on Jan 23, 2001

...if she was checked for rabies and if her husband had all of his vaccines. ))

Dave H.

[Westerngrrl]

... in response to Actually..., posted by Dave H on Jan 23, 2001

What's good for you may not be the same for me.

[Dave H]

... in response to Re: Actually..., posted by Westerngrrl on Jan 23, 2001

N/T

[cc]

... in response to Do you know art history?, posted by Westerngrrl on Jan 23, 2001

Westerngirl, your points are well taken. There are tons of people living the life without any clue at all. I don't think this is what Dave means. Academic study is important, but it is not everything. You can learn a lot by going to Hong Kong yourself, talk to the people, compare how it was before unification and what has changed. Being able to write a 2,000 word paper about is great, but at some point you will have to go beyond that, and I am sure you will.

If you look at Forbes Magazine list of 400 richest men (and women) of America, less than half completed their college degree! (Which of course doesn't mean you should drop out of college - your "Life is college" now and you should put as much energy into it as you will later into "Life without college"!)

Now I have to defend my Countryman Nietzsche.... , yes, he was abnormal, but stupid he was not. There is a lot we can learn about the human condition from intelligent writers who find themselves at psychological extremes. "Zarathustra" will remain one of the most intriguing documents ever written. I visited Yellowstone National Park last year, reading "Zarathustra" at night. It was a perfect match to the gloomy athmosphere of this amazing wilderness area!