As I sit here eating a bowl of oatmeal...

[jfred]

... in response to thats EXACTLY what we are afraid of, posted by outwest on Mar 16, 2001

You say she is not a gold digger for doing that, well
perhaps not in the traditional sense, but any woman who
marries a man she does not love, as you described, it is
a business arrangement, purely financial reasons,

I would have to agree.  The circumstances you describe, while understandable, make her seem like a prostitute as well as a deceitful woman.

Jim

[kevin]

... in response to thats EXACTLY what we are afraid of, posted by outwest on Mar 16, 2001

This kind of "noble" proposition is no better than the japioki who voluntarily becomes a japioki to "help her family".  If anything it is worse, because she is decieving someone with good and noble intentions.

Pause for a moment.  If such a girl comes from a good family and needs to help them because they're poor, one might think that such a girl would hold her husband to the same standard that her mother held her father to.  I'm assuming that both parents remained married and mutually love and respect each other.

My paternal grandparents were poor, but they remained married for life, loved each other very much, and bonded with each other.  My grandmother certainly did not marry my grandfather to improve her lot economically.  Although they lived meagerly, they made their lives to revolve around each other and family, and were able to carve a niche in this world together.  The love shared between them is something all the money in the world couldn't buy.

- Kevin

[Carrisse]

... in response to thats EXACTLY what we are afraid of, posted by outwest on Mar 16, 2001

that you need to be careful and make sure that you cover all your bases.

Also Love is a risk.  You are taking a risk everytime you get into that car of yours.  Don't expect an angel.  The world and its inhabitants are not perfect.

[Timee]

... in response to How many times do I have to say, posted by Carrisse on Mar 16, 2001

Carrisse is confirming a post I made ealier in this forum.  
Gentlemen please do not bully the woman because she is telling you the truth.  This board is about sharing important information.  Information that can spare you the harm and hurt that others have suffered.

I think the best choice of words are that some Philippine women are "sacrifing" to be with you.  You don't know how close that word "sacrificing" defines a belief that exist in so many Philippino's hearts.  I have found that so many women do not plan for the future,  they lack hope.  There are good reasons why Philippino's think and believe the way they do.  It is called survival.  The women have little value.  Walmart and the like makes near slaves out of the people.  People die of diarea.  Think about it,  what would you do to save your loveones life in a hopeless situation?  Love is a tool and often used with a hidden objective.

Many of you men are leading youself down a road which may lead to harm.  I personaly jumped over 20 good women to get to the devil I married.  I know first hand that there are good women in the Philippine, because I left them there.  You will more than likly not find the good one's they normaly don't advertise and are not as agressive.

I do not hate or dislike an entire race as someone noted in a post.  I have made many bad decisions.

How do you know if your Philippino wife loves you?  she is there on day 735 along with your bank account. joke!

[kevin]

... in response to How many times do I have to say, posted by Carrisse on Mar 16, 2001

at the inception of the idea of marrying a Kano?  I would think that you wanted to avoid getting entangled in a perilous situation.  I would hope that in contemplating marriage, that love is what leads to marriage.

- Kevin

[outwest]

... in response to How many times do I have to say, posted by Carrisse on Mar 16, 2001

How can you cover all your bases , if the woman says she loves you, and she is just using, you...give her a lie
detector test?

[Jeff S]

... in response to As I sit here eating a bowl of oatmeal....., posted by Carrisse on Mar 16, 2001

My wife makes a concotion of ground dried anchovies, ground up wakame seaweed, soy powder, and green powder tea with a little hot water to make it pasty first thing every morning. What a way to start the day! Actually, I'm getting pretty used to the taste. Some of us gringos actually like dried fish and squid!
-- Jeff S.

[kevin]

... in response to Not with oatmeal, but.., posted by Jeff S on Mar 16, 2001


I'd hate to be around you if you were to release an SBD.  (LOL)

On the other hand, I like sqid.  I like fried squid rings.  When I was first married, my ex-wife cooked a Pinoy squid delicacy with tomato sauce.  It was sarap.

- Kevin

[Dave H]

... in response to Not with oatmeal, but.., posted by Jeff S on Mar 16, 2001

Jeff,

The things we do for love! ROFL I thought that my All Bran cereal tasted like cardboard and pretty bad. ;o)) Suddenly, my fiancee eating rice for breakfast doesn't sound so bad anymore either.

Dave H.

[Tim]

... in response to As I sit here eating a bowl of oatmeal....., posted by Carrisse on Mar 16, 2001

My wife is from China, but she has expressed some of the same feelings that you have about adjusting to life here. I don't think it is easy to adjust to American culture, regardless of the home country of the new immigrant. Heck, I even read complaints from people immigrating here from England.

Regards, Tim

[Jeff S]

... in response to Re: As I sit here eating a bowl of oatme..., posted by Tim on Mar 16, 2001

when they move to California!

[Dave H]

... in response to You ought to hear the mid-westerners whi..., posted by Jeff S on Mar 16, 2001

but in South Florida, the the New Yawk and French Canadian snowbirds are whining so loud, no one can hear me. I will have to wait until spring. ))

Dave H.

[kevin]

... in response to You ought to hear the mid-westerners whi..., posted by Jeff S on Mar 16, 2001

Remember the "Oakies" in the "Grapes of Wrath" from the Depression Era.

Oops, sorry TNeal and Carl.  I hope that comment was OK.

Ah, another pun.  Life is funny.

- Kevin

[Georgina]

... in response to As I sit here eating a bowl of oatmeal....., posted by Carrisse on Mar 16, 2001

I am not Pinay but latina and I read your post. It really moved me.You are not alone. I wonder as I read your post how many times I have felt the same way. Getting used to living in a country so different to the place I was born is not easy. I know it was my decision, but sometimes you want for the rest to make it easier for you. Less stereotyping and a little of respect would be helpful. God bless.

[Dave H]

... in response to Re: As I sit here eating a bowl of oatme..., posted by Georgina on Mar 16, 2001

Hi Georgina,

Where I live (South Florida), I have had to adapt to the Latin culture. The change was more gradual than yours, or for other people that move to the US. It was my choice, many Americans moved away. But, I love my Latin family and friends. One of my friends is very homesick for Argentina. She has been away for 3 years. She lives here with her Argentinean husband and children, but it is still not easy. She even has many Argentinean and Latin friends. I am the only gringo friend.

Good luck, you are not alone. It will take time.

Dave H.