Other than the occasional beating that she gives me for not picking up after myself, things have been great!    Seriously, I can't imagine life without her now.  So I think we have to be considered a success!

                        SteveG

                              joemc

Honey was smart - I saw it almost instantly by a counter question to one of mine - she clearly out foxed me.  I was so impressed.  She wasn't going to be fooled by a sweet talker.  And she seem to welcome my questions and my responses to them too.  We had so much in common by the way we pictured things, our beliefs.  Still we some differences too (like our radically differences in color preferences and what we think is "pangit and maganda" in people), we even have one common weakness that surely one day will be our downfall.  But we knew it all before we got married because we discussed it.

I am amazed at the "trust" AM's have for women.  They fail to ask even the most simpliest questions.  Maybe they are afraid that might cause them to fail to get to the next base and the thought of starting over is just too harsh to deal woth.  The trust that surely "everything will be alright", or "she so pretty and I think she likes me" often gets shot down in flames when reality of hard choices occur. If only the important issues were discussed before...  Even Jesus "decided" before he was confronted with the choice.  He simply had to say "no" because he had decided in his mind first (note the events of the 40 days and nights fast, test and trials).  So two people find an attraction to each other but come from different points of view and they try to adjust to each other without knowing how each other will react.  Sometimes it succeeds but for some reason here in America if fails more often.  Selfishness, self-determination, the thought you can be all you can be without anyone (individualism), pride, political and social pressures that make family seem unimportant and many others all play a part.  In reality "family" is all that's important.  It is the smallest unit and increditably strong when all members love, respect and support each other.

A Hymn from my church called "Love at Home" starts...

There is beauty all around
When there's love at home;
There is joy in every sound
When there's love at home;
Peace and plenty there abide
Smiling sweet on every side
Time doth softly, sweetly glide
When there's love at home.
Love at home,
Love at home;
Time doth softly, sweetly glide
When there's love at home.

Too many people think that "individualism" is strong but in reality like the parable of the sticks is easily broken when separated from others.  But when bound with others it is near unbreakable.

But how can can you adjust to each other without asking, knowing what will happen when the hard things you fear occur?  How can the other person know how to react without knowing what your fears are?  Expectations are with us and somehow we know how we be challenged by God so discussing them ends any trepitation and adjustment before it occurs.  Still pulling teeth without anesthesia is easier in America than to get people to discuss their expectations.  How does a person know they love you till they know what makes you strong and weak?  How do you love them if you think their strengths counter yours and your weaknesses are the same as theirs?

The failures Mars notes in each case were expectations not discussed which in each case made "love" impossible.  No love, no family.

Bear and Honey