In mid-July, I returned from my 2nd trip to St Petersburg and concerning my girlfriend: all my expectations were exceeded!  I left Dina with a diamond ring and we’re working on the K1 visa right now.  We first in April of this year through a local agency recommended by Jack Bragg.  Are we in love, excited and happy?  YOU BET!

I just want to share some of my experiences, observations & make some suggestions.  First off, I started my search in Oct of 2000.  So it has taken me about 2.5 years to find Dina.  During that time I learned a lot from the discussion board but much more from experience (good & bad).

1. PRE-MEETING COMMUNICATION CAN BE MEANINGLESS.  I communicated with Olga from St Pete for 9 months via email & phone calls and the main purpose of my April trip was to meet her.  But it took only 1 dinner to realize the chemistry wasn’t there.

2. HAVE A PLAN B.  Before I left on my April trip, I contacted a local St Pete agency that was suggested to me by Jack Bragg: Ksenia’s Dating.  So after realizing Olga was not going to work out, I visited Ksenia’s office and the first girl that I selected from her many profiles is now my girlfriend.  Ksenia was a pleasure to work with, spoke good English, had a huge selection of girls’ profiles to choose from and had a convenient office in the city center near the Radisson SAS.

3. ENGLISH IS ESSENTIAL.  It’s difficult enough for a man & a women to communicate who are from the same country and speak the same language!  Throw in a language barrier and your probability for a successful long-term relationship is less.

4. BE POLITE.  Open doors, help them with their chair at restaurants, etc.  Just common sense politeness but it can go a long way with impressing a girl.  I would bet they don’t get much politeness out of most Russian men.

5. ORDER FOR THEM.  This isn’t practiced much here in the states but Dina expected me to order for her, even though my Russian is near-zero.  Most of the waiters & waitresses understand enough English for you to get by.

6. BE DECISIVE.  The Russian girls are looking to you to make decisions.  They see it as a sign of strength and they want their man to be strong.  So avoid making statements like, “it doesn’t matter to me, you decide”.

7. YOU ARE PROUD TO BE SEEN WITH HER.  Tell her that you are proud to be with her in public.  Dina brought this up with me by saying, “you haven’t mentioned that you are proud to be with me when we’re out.  Are you?”

8.  PAY FOR EVERYTHING.  When you’re out with your girl, pay for everything.  I learned this the hard way.  On my July trip, Dina stayed with me in a rented apartment but she forgot her hair brush.  So when we were out walking, she stopped to buy one and I didn’t step up & pay for it.  So I got the cold shoulder/silent treatment for the next hour.  This is a classic culture difference because many American girls would get offended if you tried to pay for their hair brush.

9.  A RING?  Since July was my 2nd time seeing Dina, I was already fairly sure about our feelings for each other.  So I bought a very modest diamond ring ($500), knowing that I could return it in 30 days for a full refund OR I could upgrade it in the future.  I waited until the end of my trip to present it to her and she was very surprised & happy.

10. RENT AN APARTMENT.  This worked out better for me on both my trips.  You have a full kitchen if you want to cook.  It is more like a home than a hotel room, so it is easier for you and your lady to be more comfortable.  I can make a strong recommendation: Oksana at www dot oksanas dot net.  She offers airport transportation at a reasonable rate.  The flat rental rates are reasonable.  The apartments are clean, well-decorated, well-equipped and the photos of them on her website are very accurate.  Both apartments were with minutes of Nevsky Prospect in the city center.  Her English is fluent.

Feel free to contact me directly with any questions: pmo5992445@aol.com

Good luck to all with your search!  The rewards can be priceless.

... in response to Re: Success in St Petersburg!, posted by mudd on Aug 10, 2003

The web address is: www dot ksenia-dating dot com

... in response to Good luck...., posted by LP on Aug 4, 2003

that 2 years ago you would have been "stoned" as a heritic for saying negative things about FSU girls, and they would have shouted troll, troll, troll, as they hurled the rocks?

Seems that of late, many have come forward to tell of horror stories of their FSU wives, soon to be ex-wives.  Being a realist is sometimes very difficult.  I read of one fellow here, who will remain nameless, who is old enough to know better....but to each their own.  Someday, they will find out all are the same, and even if you start with better stock, maybe, they will soon become "Americanized" which is right where we all are now!  Mind you, I am not immune.  I adore my squeeze, who has been very supportive in a difficult time for me.  We continue to write, but I've not seen her for a while, and she knows my jury is still out.  Risk vs. reward....Risk vs. reward.....and cover your ass.  And, I liked the camera idea!

... in response to Do You Know............., posted by Globetrotter on Aug 5, 2003

...I wouldn't have had much negative to say, but that was before I'd seen the carnage they can sow. I was also fairly ignorant of their culture and how it's trained them from day one to be manipulative. Now I know better, it's practically in their genes.

Like you, I know a few guys who used to post here but have quietly slipped away because they did everything mostly right (thats something coming from me) and it exploded anyway because they were blinded and misread the woman's true intentions. (We'll forget the guys who were idiots from the git-go.)

And two years ago I didn't quite understand the motivation of many of those involved. You've heard of the fog of war? Thats nothing compared to the fog of despair. They're an open book if you read carefully. Oddly enough, it almost gives them a valid excuse for acting the way they do.

I adore these girls too and I've even met some nice ones. I'm just not on a mission to quickly marry one. Why would anyone do such a crazy thing when there is an inexhaustable supply to choose from? Oh yeah, they've found the "right one". Just like the last ones were the right ones the day they met *them*. If you think being a realist is difficult, try being the opposite...

Let 'em hurl all the rocks they want, I've never been raked over in a divorce or lost a dime to a woman I didn't want to spend. And I've seldom been alone to boot. Women are just people, with all that implies, not something to be put on a pedestal and worshiped. I like 'em too, but not a one of them is special in any way...unless you have a need for them to be.

And if you do, you have problems no woman can solve. On the contrary, she's got you where she wants you....again.

... in response to Two years ago...., posted by LP on Aug 5, 2003

I was also fairly ignorant of their culture and how it's trained them from day one to be manipulative. Now I know better, it's practically in their genes.

Could you expound on this?

... in response to It comes from the "life is hard&quo..., posted by John K on Aug 6, 2003

It is "the "Hun" (German) who is at your throat or at your feet."  The line you came up with I never heard or read in any history book.

... in response to Re: Winston Churchill, posted by Turner on Aug 13, 2003

In the early 400's AD the Huns, a militant people from the steppes near the Caspian Sea turned their attention to the west.  And pillaged, raped, plundered and murdered at a then unknown and unprecedentated rate of devestation in Europe.  They were of Asiatic descent and killed probably a few million in the most brutal ways.  Although,  for a time (50 years)the Huns settled on the Danube on the Plains of Hungary,  most left for the east after the Battle of Chalone (a stalemate battle) and a few years later after the death of Attila,  just after he abandoned invading Italy.  The Huns had been greatly weakened by battles with the Western Roman Empire (Aetius), the Eastern Empire,  Visisgoths, Ostragoths, Vandals and other barbarians who would have descended upon the Huns in their weakened state,  had they stayed.  Both Eastern and Western Europe was a victim of the Huns and millions were killed,  instilling great fear in the populations.  But,  modern Hungarians have little to do with the Huns, although some may carry some small genetic remnants, muted down through the ages.  The Huns were terrible for Eastern Europe,  but in a few hundred year the Mongols appeared...who had a more lasting effect.

... in response to The point being?...n/t, posted by Stevo on Aug 13, 2003

No real point.  I just didn't think Churchill was referring to Hungarians...but to the Nazi's.  Maybe I mis-read something.