prenup in IL

[Travis]

... in response to Re: Re: Re: IMHO prenups are mostly abou..., posted by Lynn on Jun 10, 2003

not entirely true. I was married for 61 days when I filed for divorce so my wife's legal interest in my house is nothing (not that this fact stopped her from trying to take the house), but it doesn't mean I didn't have to pay. Heck, I'm STILL paying!

[Lynn]

... in response to Close but..., posted by Travis on Jun 10, 2003

Was there "any" equity in the house? I suspect so.

[Travis]

... in response to Re: Close but..., posted by Lynn on Jun 10, 2003

Yes but none she was entitled to. That isn't what cost me...legal fees, spousal support...etc!

[Lynn]

... in response to Re: Re: Close but..., posted by Travis on Jun 10, 2003

Every thing is about contract and commerce, when you play their game, you gonna pay. How much of a percent of your spousal support goes to her lawyer----I would guess 10% or better. My brother's ex is giving up 15% to the vultures and she didn't even realize what she had done until it was over.

[Travis]

... in response to Exactly..........., posted by Lynn on Jun 10, 2003

Actually it's probably closer to 66%. I was ordered to pay $750/month for three months. I can only guess that her attorneys retainer was somewhere close to my attorneys, which was $1500. I think that's why her attorney promised her the moon and everything I had, to get some money out of her (or me). He knew full well he counldn't deliver but she bought it hook, line and sinker! What some people will do for a green card and what others will do for a green back...unreal!

[Lynn]

... in response to Re: Yes your honor........, posted by Patrick on Jun 9, 2003

[This message has been edited by Lynn]

My point was and is that you "tacitly" make the statement that was the first part of my post every time you enter it contract with a attorney------that is your legal standing when they represent you.

My second point is as stated, your attorney not only represents you when it comes time to put the prenup to the test (if it comes to that), he will also be representing your opponent. There are ways to get around almost anything under statutory laws.

And as was my point on my first post of this string, and as you stated above, there are other things that can be done to protect pre-existing assets that do not involve a prenup---although I don't think we were on the same page as to exactly how.

[Richard]

... in response to Re: Re: Yes your honor........, posted by Lynn on Jun 9, 2003

perhaps the two of you are on the same page, perhaps not the same paragraph though. The important point is that there are many ways to go about protecting your assets.

I like your concept of a friendly lien on your assets.  However, I'm concerned about the friendly lien could turn into an unfriendly lien.  I *thought* I had a friendly agreement with my first wife about how things would be divided if the need arose.  Of course, when the need arose, she wanted something quite different.  Have you had any experience with these "friendly liens" in practice?

[Lynn]

... in response to Re: Re: Re: Yes your honor........, posted by Richard on Jun 9, 2003

[This message has been edited by Lynn]

My brother hired a female lawyer, with the reputation for meanest barracuda in the area, for his divorce. I had warned him not to put all his faith in her. Turns out, he caught her in more than just a tactical exchange of thoughts with the opposing lawyer-----(he could vaguely hear her talking in the next room at the court house (after she had excused herself from him to "check some things", so he took a dime and removed the receptacle cover and listened as they discussed him as though he was a dead carcass and they were the vultures. He confronted her about it, she became very embarrassed and tried to deny what had went on. To make a long story short, he ended up with all his real estate having a 1st lien on it to his ex to ensure that she got her monthly payments, she got the house, the new car and support, including insurance for 12 years. He was in a position to where he could borrow no money against any of his property for his business. He said to me that he felt he had been screwed over by his own lawyer and he was right.

I will not elaborate here, but if you indirectly manage the liening entity, what would be the risk?

[Patrick]

... in response to Re: Re: Yes your honor........, posted by Lynn on Jun 9, 2003

Who is the opponent you're referring to?  The wife?  I was under the impression from the lawyers I talked to that the same attorney can not represent both you and your fiancee when it comes to a pre-nup.  I believe you need separate lawyers.  Perhaps it depends on the state.  Anyway, the best advice remains the same and this thread illustrates the point well with all the confusion.  Go see a lawyer (or lawyers) in your own area and get as informed as possible by someone who (should) know family law for your own state.

[Lynn]

... in response to I rest my case, posted by Patrick on Jun 9, 2003

Yes the wife. I did not say that you could both hire the same lawyer.  

When it comes to a court battle. Not only does your lawyer represent you, but he also represents the one you are opposing and vice versa. My brother found this to be true the hard way, in his divorce. And when it comes right down to it, his first allegance is to the court.

Caveat Emptor

[Richard]

... in response to Re: Yes your honor........, posted by Patrick on Jun 9, 2003

The gospel according to Patrick:

It's far better to get advice from an attorney than anyone on this message board. I think everyone considering getting married should consult with a family law attorney first, regardless of where their spouse comes from or how they met.

According to Richard:

I would second that advice and add that one should consult a *good* lawyer.  My second divorce lawyer was much better than my first lawyer.  If I had known some of the things that the second lawyer told me at the beginning of the process, I would have been in a much better position.  Even more so when I consider that the second lawyer was a much better advisor and negotiator than the first lawyer. (The first lawyer let me put my foot in my mouth and then charged me for extricating it…)

I think Patrick did it right when he interviewed several lawyers. If you feel the need to proceed with a lawyer, you will have a good basis for choosing one.

[Lynn]

... in response to prenup in IL, posted by romachko on Jun 7, 2003

What better protection could you have than a "friendly" lien against your assets? No equity, no payola.

A little food for thought.

Lynn

[Travis]

... in response to prenup in IL, posted by romachko on Jun 7, 2003

Besides the excellant advice below, it really depends on what kind of state you live in as all their laws are different. If you live in a community property state, then your assets going into the marriage are protected for some time but that isn't to say you wouldn't have to pay alimony or spousal support, ie you may live in a community property state, but does it allow for a no fault divorce? Bottom line, consult an attorney to learn what your exposure is and if there is a way to protect yourself.

[tfcrew]

... in response to prenup in IL, posted by romachko on Jun 7, 2003

..and may  no matter how well drawn up it is.
Also, there is no attorney's refunds (needless to say).
This is especially true with foreign wives as mentioned below.
.." the ex gets nothing the first 10 years" ?
Don't bet on it.

[TwoBitBandit]

... in response to prenup in IL, posted by romachko on Jun 7, 2003

This stuff is really complicated.  It varies from state to state and has all kinds of wierd rules and exceptions.

In some states, there are also some things additional steps to protect separate property you had before the marriage to make sure it stays as your separate property.

Prenups can be especially complex with foreign spouses, because the foreign spouse can easily claim they didn't understand the agreement.  They can also claim they had to sign it "under duress" because of the ninety-day limitation on a fiancee visa.

If you really want to get a good answer, go consult with an attorney for an hour.  It's important that you get your facts dead straight and right on the money when it comes to this issue.  If you can't afford an attorney for an hour, your assets aren't enough to warrant protecting, anyway!