Trip to Ukraine!

[Globetrotter]

... in response to WOW Thanks!, posted by dandy on Feb 19, 2003

Firstly, welcome.  Most first time posters don't announce their engagement as you did.  Many have gone your route and things didn't work out as planned, so don't be upset that everyone doesn't share your euphoria.

Nobody wants to see you fail...just the opposite.  You wrote some interesting things I will comment on.  I think you meant that you can learn a great deal about a person in the first week, as opposed to afterward.  (you said,than
"previously")  I think you can certainly form a favorable impression of a person in a week.  But I know few to none who can see and determine a person's entire emotional, psychological, spiritual and physical range in a week.

You can learn much by asking the right questions, and some questions and answers carry more weight than others.  But everything you need to know in a week?  Maybe you could enlighten us with the top 10 or 20 or 100 that made you "pop the question".

By the way, a well written prenup which is fair for both, with enough time to study and modify, does stand.  Few judges want to be overturned.  I have some experience here as well.  And they protect things like appreciation, as well as marital assets.

Knowing what the divorce rate here is, just ask yourself if this is really in your best interest to move so rapidly.  Ask yourself if this is the same way you would act here with an American girl, to get engaged after 2 weeks.  If your answer is no, maybe you have not asked yourself "the right questions".

Sorry to have gotten your titty in a wringer.  I just always ask in business as well as my personal life...look at the way things really are, as opposed to the way you would like them to be.  Good Luck.

[Zoidberg]

... in response to Re: WOW Thanks!, posted by Globetrotter on Feb 19, 2003

GLOBETROTTER WROTE:
Knowing what the divorce rate here is, just ask yourself if this is really in your best interest to move so rapidly. Ask yourself if this is the same way you would act here with an American girl, to get engaged after 2 weeks. If your answer is no, maybe you have not asked yourself "the right questions".
_______

I do not believe he based his engagement on meeting someone for 2 weeks. There was a 7 month writing period. That is important and does factor into it all. Earlier in your message you did write that "You can learn much by asking the right questions, and some questions and answers carry more weight than others." Ok, fare enough but don't you think many of these questions can be asked in those letters and phone conversations? What is that letter writing time for? Once you meet you can ask the same questions and also more but do not ignore the writing period like it seems like a few of you are doing. There is a lot of value that can come out of that in helping someone decide to marry or not. Ultimately the meeting is the most important but everything must be added together when you decide to get married...

I think it was MarkInTx that wrote something about by writing for a long period you tend to get to know the person. When you finally meet it's not like meeting a stranger. I couldn't agree with him more.

Z.

[LP]

... in response to I disagree with one comment... , posted by Zoidberg on Feb 19, 2003

...do you really buy into that? That writing or even talking for a period of time is equal to a time spent together enviornment? That you can really know someone well enough through those mediums to propose *marriage* after a short face to face meeting? Is that the point yer makin here? I say again: yikes!

[yoe]

... in response to Yikes....., posted by LP on Feb 20, 2003

[This message has been edited by yoe]

I was using a translator........and I was paying for letters that my now wife was not even writing. When I ask her later about some letters, she said she never wrote the stuff. LP we both have hindsight.......this guy is young. If we could be 29 again.......hahaha. Thank God he will not make the same mistakes as I. I cannot judge, but I feel that he should be man enough to look at both sides and tread cautiously........I made a few trips over to meet my 'woman' before she came over. Some guys never see the girl again until she arrives at the airport.......'peoples is funny man.........'
Joe

[MarkInTx]

... in response to I disagree with one comment... , posted by Zoidberg on Feb 19, 2003

"I think it was MarkInTx that wrote something about by writing for a long period you tend to get to know the person. When you finally meet it's not like meeting a stranger. I couldn't agree with him more. "

Yeah... but what do I know?

I only married a woman from Ukraine, and wake up each morning with her, and start the day by thanking God I found her...

Ya'll really should listen to the advice of the guys who have searched but never found anyone... I'm just an idiot... They all know much more than I do...

They're experts on searching for someone. Some of them have been at it for years...

PS: I'm not around much anymore... but if you want to have a dialog about anything, drop me a line at: markjoel60@hotmail.com

The few times I have dropped by, I've enjoyed your posts...

[mudd]

... in response to WOW Thanks!, posted by dandy on Feb 19, 2003

you sound like a little kid winning because your parents took away your toy. if you cant handle a few opinions when they are not what you expected, then maybe you shouldnt post on here. just my opinion, but you sound like a guy who is just dieing to get  burned,  good luck.

[yoe]

... in response to WOW Thanks!, posted by dandy on Feb 19, 2003

[This message has been edited by yoe]

if this little constructive criticism has ruffled those delicate feathers---------run like hell now.......you will not last the 90 days. Due to the fact that you have unrelenting determination and a empircal knowledge of women-you have no knowledge of your family, co-workers, strangers lalalala that will look at you with suspicious stares wondering if you had lost your mind or if you are just a loser..........THIS IS REAL. Next you must deal with a woman who will be afraid, insecure, needy, uncertain and all the other worst traits of feminity-----are you ready to be a dad, a husband and a priest? Hey Jim Dandy............take the heat or run from the kitchen.......peace Joe
:oP
and love Squirrels

[LP]

... in response to WOW Thanks!, posted by dandy on Feb 19, 2003

....I could appeal to your logic but I see that wouldn't help. Congrats, you've made so many conflicting and senseless statements you've bested me and I wouldn't know where to begin anyway. I've absolutely no experience in this and I'm just here to be sarcastic wise azz, ask anyone.

So I'll just say good luck. If you're too blind to see the "usefulness" of posts that don't coincide with your fantasies you're gonna need it. You be a good example of the old adage that "one can't argue with a drunken man."

[micha1]

... in response to You be welcome...., posted by LP on Feb 19, 2003

It is very true that you can hardly argue with a drunken person.
But one day, hopefully by the next morning, the person will have sober up.
One the subject that is on the table, here,
you can't  argue at all, with a guy that has hard on.
Which is a situation that is often confuse with love.
Loneliness can also motivate a person to dream,
to find easy answers....etc.
In the end, with all the goodwill in the world,
what do we really know from our elbow......

The only thing that I can confess knowing,
it is that I shall never know about roses,
women and love.

michel

[Rando]

... in response to WOW Thanks!, posted by dandy on Feb 19, 2003

Dandy,

I agree that there are a few posters on here that feel superior to all, and their sarcasm in fact makes them useless to this forum.

Please dont let one or two fools stop you from posting. Im still learning and I learn much from questions just like yours.

These guys who already "know it all"..I really wonder why they stay on this site. Heck, I already know how to be rude and sarcastic....Im not interested in learning that.

You post an excellent question. You deserve honest answers and questions and opinions to your post. I think you got that for the most part. Ignore the rude and superior attitude from some. They are just looking for attention and they become ineffective voices to anyone but themselves.

You can still learn from a fool though....even if it's just to not act like the fool.

Don't go ...keep posting. Im new and could learn much from the answers to your question.

Thanks,

Randy

[Globetrotter]

... in response to Re: WOW Thanks!, posted by Rando on Feb 19, 2003

Do you actually justify what most here including Jack, who's in the business, would consider reckless and foolhardy behavior?  Is this rude and being a fool, or acting foolishly?  When you go over for the first time, will you do the same as our new friend, who is not 17, and old enough to know better?  Jack, who peddles the flesh, has said many times that 30 to 40% of the girls may be scammers, card sharks, looking for a boat, or worse!  Some have had a pretty bad ride, some have contemplated suicide, some have died.  Most agree that this is not for the faint of heart.  All have read stories of some who have had very bad results from the venture.  We all love to read stories whereby it does end up a fairytale, with gobs of work and tutoring, and mentoring, and more care and love you need to give to a local girl...which keeps some of us thinking, maybe it can happen to us as well.  But you are dealing with a female who thinks with the other side of her brain, who may have an agenda, who might be very bored once here.
The possibilities are endless.  This is not the easy road but more difficult than one would normally encounter.  And just think, he was able to look, determine, judge, fall in love, ask the right questions, and her to marry him in a week.  This persuit, the most difficult thing any one of us will ever do in our lifetime, he was able to do in a week.
Right!  Maybe he should write a book about this great "shortcut to happiness" he has discovered by asking "all the right questions."  Sorry.  Lots of work, lots of questions, lots of actions observed, ask more questions, look into your soul and ask yourself tough questions, take your time...then act.  You know, human nature is also somewhere in this equation.

I don't see anything bad about anything that has been written in response to his gleaming post, but favors to him in saying, tread lightly.  Some have a more bellicose way of stating the obvious, but the messages are in his interest.  How can you object?  Nobody wants to see this guy fail, which is why they offer an opinion, which is why he came in the first place.  Wake up and smell the petunias!

[Mike]

... in response to I Don't Get It!, posted by Globetrotter on Feb 20, 2003

I met my wife on a vacation to Russia, liked her very much, and eventually invited her here after a few months. (with no choice but the K-1 visa)Got married because she was still the girl I met while on vacation. Heck lets look at this in dollars. Meet a girl there and come home and spend many nights wanting to go see her again because you are really impressed by her and then fly there many times to know her better on her turf which may or may not end up being a big production to empress you, or k-1 her over here and do your research. If you have a good impression of her then go for it! Why would you want to gamble there when you can gamble here where the odds are in your favor for not being scammed? She can't take you for anything of value or at least equal to the amount spent flying there over and over again. I suspect many folks are just tooo worried that this has to be EXACTLY perfect before bringing them here but yet some are still taken to the cleaners because they are sure she is the one after many trips there and marry quickly once here. On the technical side of things after 90 days are over you still have an additional 89 days to fly her back before she will get the banned from entering stamp placed in her passport, and if you do get married after the 90 days you'll just have to file the I-130 and she'll be good to go.(the down side only being able to go home before receiving advance perole in the even of an emergency)
Mike

[Jski]

... in response to I Don't Get It!, posted by Globetrotter on Feb 20, 2003

...his 7 months of writing.  Sure he pulled the trigger the week he was there.  Its also his decision to make.  Its what he feels comfortable with and he did it.

I took it as he was happy about what he did and wanting to share it, not asking if it was right or wrong.  IMHO

[Rando]

... in response to Re: A week?  You're neglecting....., posted by Jski on Feb 20, 2003

He also made a point about applying for the K1 but waiting some time before using it. Can you do this? Is there a time period after approval that requires you to take action on this approval?

[Rags]

... in response to Re: Re: A week?  You're neglecting....., posted by Rando on Feb 20, 2003

[This message has been edited by Rags]

the K-1 visa is good for six months from the date issued. I also believe that it can be reissued with fewer hassles than getting it the first time.

BTW, once you're petition gets approved (the hard part) you can delay the interview process. I don't know for how long but until you have the things needed (packet 4) for the Embassy they will not schedule an interview.

With the current delays processing petitions, you should have plenty of time ; (