Back From Kiev

[MarkInTx]

... in response to Thee is also the "Catholic" fa..., posted by Oscar on Sep 18, 2002

Not Really.

And... is catholic any more difficult that Russian Orthodox?

[Oscar]

... in response to Re: Thee is also the "Catholic"..., posted by MarkInTx on Sep 18, 2002

If a woman is Russian Orthodox but goes once a year (as many there do), it has not presented much of a problem, at least not to men I have spoken to with women from the FSU.  Some of my family are Catholic and it is a VERY big deal to them!  I know that for many Latin and South American women, it is also a very big deal..  I have nothing against the Catholic Church at all, my sister and her family are Catholic, but I think that the Latin and South American countries being like 98% Catholic bears some consideration and religion would be a definite thing you would want to discuss in depth with these women so there would be no "surprises"..

[MarkInTx]

... in response to Yes Mark-, posted by Oscar on Sep 18, 2002

My experience is that the women in both the FSU and SOB are looking to the man for leadership. Every woman I dated was willing to follow my lead for the family religion -- as long as I had one. The wanted a good moral man. They didn't care so much what church that meant we went to.

If a woman is a devout Catholic, it could pose a problem. But, don't kid yourself, if she is a devout Orthodox, it will cause even MORE problems. At least Catholicism celebrates the same Christmas, and Easter!

Most "Catholics" SOB are about as devout as the Orthodox in the FSU... or at least that has been my experience.

And, not ALL ladies in Brazil are Catholic by a long shot.

While I was there, I dated an Evangelical (the fastest growing denomination in the FSU) and a Presbyterian.

I mean... I'm not telling you to ditch your lady from Ukraine and run off to Brazil... Obviously, I am marrying a Ukrainian woman and am very happy about it.

But I think that someone who has said: "I will go anywhere in the world for my wife..." and then limits "the world" to a small section near Russia is making a big mistake.

That also includes other areas...

I mean... what is the search about? Are you after a Russian woman? Or a beautiful woman who shares your values?

If the former... then of course, you should only look in the FSU.

If the latter... you should at least CONSIDER other countries...

IMHO

[Oscar]

... in response to Catholic vs. Orthodox, posted by MarkInTx on Sep 18, 2002

Mark-

You ask- "what is the search about? Are you after a Russian woman? Or a beautiful woman who shares your values?"

I will answer by saying that I was after a RW (well, UW!) who shares my values!  That's why I went there!

I have dated women from many places Mark- Canada, Sweden, Norway, Ireland and was married to a woman from Switzerland!  So I think I have hardly been myopic in my openness to other cultures!  I have a lot of formal education (for whatever it's worth!) and the women from the FSU have more of that than most other areas I have found, they also typically love the Arts, which are also a great love of mine.  So I was looking for some beginning common ground and found it.  I am also most attracted physically to FSU women.  I am just not attracted to most of the Latin/South American women I have seen or see on the web sites.  Yes, the religion thing scares me as the Catholics I know (including some of my own family) are very specific about not marrying out of the Church and it does not help that an aquaintance of mine who is married to a Brazilian woman is told constantly by her that unless he joins the Catholic Church, their marriage will never be recognized by God!  Now I know this is only one woman but...

I think your experience has either been quite unique with women in regards to religion or else you have had some woment that have not been very honest with you.  I found that in the FSU it was often an issue!  More than a few women there I met said they would never go to Church, there or in the USA and were quite atheistic, and some others who were very Orthodox who said they could not marry if the man were not baptized Orthodox first!  But as I recall, I didn't think you actually met that many women in the FSU (I could be wrong and it is NOT meant as a slam).  I met probably at last 125 women there and I often did feel it was an important issue, from my experience.

So, I have experienced women from other countries, (you can't go to every single one of them), and I found that I felt most comfortable with the FSU ladies..  I don't see anything wrong with that.  I searched there for a LONG time before finding a woman that for me, was the kindest, most sincere and that I had the most in common with of all the women I met there, which was a lot... and yes, I also think she's beautiful! ;-)

[HappyInBrazil]

... in response to Yes Mark-, posted by Oscar on Sep 18, 2002

Oscar, your advice about talking so that there are no surprises needs to be engraved on a hammer and pounded into everyone's head.

My wife, who is Brazilian, is Catholic and I talked about this very early as we were getting to know each other so there wasn't any confusion about where we are at.  The differences were not an issue in our case.  Knowing what I know now, after having lived in Brazil, I would be more concerned if she were (Evangelical) Christian.  But like you say, it is an issue that needs to be discussed in depth to make sure you are both comfortable with each other's beliefs.  I think there are more questions that people should be asking each other as well, this is just one.

[Oscar]

... in response to Good Advice and not limited  to Brazilia..., posted by HappyInBrazil on Sep 18, 2002

Yes, it has nothing to do with "Catholicism", it's just when people are quite active in a certain religion, it really does need to be discussed IN DEPTH!  But then so do finances, raising children, SEX (frequency AND style, some people are into S&M and some are not!!), in-laws, time spent together and apart etc..  Many guys do end up finding a hottie and just HOPE the rest will fall into place..  Often this is not the case.

[HappyInBrazil]

... in response to Re: Good Advice and not limited  to Braz..., posted by Oscar on Sep 18, 2002

It would be nice to see a good thread on all the sorts of things to consider as topics that should be discussed out.

One of the ones I found interesting was the question about what would you do if we couldn't have kids together.  I see some people here in the US take things to extremes.  And also, seeing some of people's strong views about how important it was that the kids be theirs biologically.

Every once in a while, my wife and I will have a good conversation that was the result of some topic that came up here.

[thesearch]

... in response to Brazil, posted by MarkInTx on Sep 17, 2002

Mark,

Do you have any stats on the ratio of men to women in Brazil? My friend tells me there are significantly more women compared to men.

He was referring to San Paulo.

[MarkInTx]

... in response to Re: Brazil, posted by thesearch on Sep 18, 2002

I used to know the exact numbers... There is an online paper for Brazil that was useful.

Your friend is right. As in Russia, the women outnumber the men in Brazil. (I think it is by a few million if I remember correctly. Don't forget though, Brazil is a VERY large country... statistics vary as you go to different regions...)

The Brazilian men are not all drunkards, but they do seem to think fidelity is a quaint notion, and only "restful now and then..." Most think nothing of having a mistress on the side. It is very common, and this is the most compelling reason that the women want to marry an American. I met several well respected executives who all had mistresses. And I mean that they had pictures of them on their desks. It was not hidden at all.

One night, an executive at a VERY respectable "consulting" firm (you'd recognize the name if I dropped it) took a couple of the guys from my company to a "club". This wasn't a strip club. This was a dinner club with high class hookers visiting the tables. ($75 cover charge.  No one stripped there. But $300 got you "whatever you wanted". She would leave with you...)

I didn't go, but the guys who went told me that it was almost impossible to believe. The women were college eductated, spoke English, and looked like super models. This place knew the guy by name. He frequents it a lot, and thinks nothing of it. And, yes, he was married.

It is this "Men Rule" attitude that the women in Brazil are tired of.

Men's Journal magazine did a cover story on Brazil back in August I believe. The guy who wrote the article observed much of what I did. He called it the world's best kept secret for men.

The woman, on the whole, have a better overall standard of living (especially in Sao Paulo) than women in Ukraine... but they work very hard. Not just the women. 60 hour workweeks are common in Sao Paulo.

It is not every woman who wants to Marry an American and leave, of course. But there are a lot.

And Americans are usually looked upon favorably in Brazil.

The women were all very sweet. I think it would be very easy to be married to a Brazilian. They are very easy-going.

They are NOT your typical "Latina". In fact, they do not consider themselves Latinas at all.  They are not from Latin America. They are from South America.

[thesearch]

... in response to Re: Re: Brazil, posted by MarkInTx on Sep 18, 2002

Thanks Mark for the information. Your words are mirroring my friends.

[MarkInTx]

... in response to Brazil, posted by MarkInTx on Sep 17, 2002

How's this for "generalities"...

In general, the women in Brazil are:

Friendlier
Less-Educated
Weigh a little more
Have better azzes
Have better teeth
Have MUCH lower incidence of scamming

As for accents: The Portuguese accent is cuter, and the Russian accent is sexier...

How's that?

YMMV, of course

[thesearch]

... in response to PS, posted by MarkInTx on Sep 18, 2002

pretty good list  Mark.

I will check that site out. However, I lean toward women who are more educated slender women but, like you say, there are beautiful women all over the world.

My friend seems to think that Brazilian women are well balanced, caring and loyal.

[MarkInTx]

... in response to Re: PS, posted by thesearch on Sep 18, 2002

Well, mind you, the women are not FAT.

Incredibly, I saw VERY few obese people the whole time I was in Sao Paulo.

The women tend to fill out a little, but they don't get fat.

And... I can't explain the Azz thing, since I am not an "azz man"... but I became one for ten days.

Lordy, Lordy, was it something to watch the women walk down the streets in the "J.Lo" pants.

I'm told the sights are even better in Rio... (And I'm also told that to find a wife it is better to travel north...)

[thesearch]

... in response to Re: Re: PS, posted by MarkInTx on Sep 18, 2002

My friend has a very young Brazilian wife. She is very sweet and attractive. He is planning on moving back to Brazil when he retires.

[MarkInTx]

... in response to Re: Re: Re: PS, posted by thesearch on Sep 18, 2002

What are their ages, if I may ask?

When I was there, the lady who I got most serious with was 26. That was a problem only with me.

She expressed concern that I was much *younger* than most men who wrote her. (She thought she might be too old for me!)

She thought the age difference was meaningless...