The saga continues

[OkieMan]

Well, I don't know what all of this means yet, but here goes.  Around 7:30PM, this evening (Saturday), I was talking on the phone with one of my sisters, when I get a beep (I have call waiting).  So, I just expected to talk to some other family member in the local area.  But, instead the call was from the calena I have been talking to you about.  Our call was short, especially since she does not speak english, and I speak very little spanish.  But, she was telling me her mother was sick, (which I already knew about).  Then she says that tomorrow, she will email me.  She also said that her son, and her neice and nephews said hello, blah blah, blah.  Now, I have already been back in the States for over a week.  All of you know my thoughts on this situation.  After the call, I call Pete.  His girlfriend has not talked to this calena; even though she was supposed to call and talk to her.  So, now I am really confused!  The only thing I can think of is that she wants to let me know she will be emailing me; but I think it is her way of saying goodbye!  I guess I will find out tomorrow.  So, stayed tuned to the same Bat-channel, and I will let you know manana!!!  Holy Cow Batman-- is that Catwoman, or is that just another crazy latina?  Who knows?

                           OkieMan

[Canadaman]

... in response to The saga continues, posted by OkieMan on Jun 11, 2005

Okieman,

I am the King of taking things the wrong way...Every time I thought something was wrong with a girl that I was very friendly with.... I was wrong and not the Latina... The language barrier can really suck sometime..

That is why I am really trying to learn Spanish... I think it is a real major step that she called you in the USA...If she did not care about you why would she waste her hard earned money on a phone call to you.

She wrote you a nice email... That takes time and effort...If she wanted to write a Dear Okieman to you she would have by now...I do not know how long you have been divorced Okieman but I know it is hard starting a new relationship again...As a man that will be a widower for 11 months on the 15th it is very hard sometimes.

You have time and emotion invested in this woman... See where it goes...I know the language barrier is hard on you Okieman but imagine how it is her shoes...Every woman is different and I know you wish that you heard from her earlier... You have heard from her now....

Hopefully Pete's girlfriend will talk to her...She had an intimate encounter with you on your last night...I take this as she really likes you and wanted something very special for you both to remember while you are apart for a while...

Hang in there Okieman...If I can help you anyway let me know...You and I have to practice are Spanish if we are to get anywhere as regards to a Latina wife...I see a lot of myself in what you are going through Okieman over the last few months... Long distance relationships can be very hard...

I know Calipro... Rule # 1 ...If you have slept with them it is no relationship...I hope I get lucky and meet a special latina someday.

We will dance at your wedding someday...

GO OKIEMAN!!!

Jeff

jeff@jam21.net

[OkieMan]

... in response to Re:  The saga continues, posted by Canadaman on Jun 12, 2005

Canadaman,

Thanks for the words of encouragement.  It is tough, and I still don't know how all of this will play out.  But, I do have sincere feelings for this lady, and one way or the other I will get through this mess.  Also, I certainly plan to learn more spanish, no question about it.  Thanks again for the moral support.
       
                           OkieMan

[lapentier]

... in response to The saga continues, posted by OkieMan on Jun 11, 2005

Okie, I just found your e-mail to me from a couple of months ago.  For some reason, it got stuck in the spam filter.  And, yes I have met your cousin.  He and his daughter are, to the best of my knowledge, teaching Spanish at a community college here.  Small world...

I will e-mail you and address tomorrow that doesn't have the strong spam filter.

--Mark

[Looking4Wife]

... in response to The saga continues, posted by OkieMan on Jun 11, 2005

Well Okie...

Did she say she misses you or that she enjoyed spending time with you?  Did she say anything that sounded affectionate?  

Did she say she got your emails/phone messages (if you emailed her / called her since you've been back in the states)?

Also I want to say my heart goes out to you on the mixed signals you've received... at least she showed you some signs of affection while you were there... it could have been worse had you traveled to another country and she was totally standoffish... but mixed signals are never fun...

[papi]

... in response to The saga continues, posted by OkieMan on Jun 11, 2005

her calling you in the States is significant, having sex with you is too. i think you are jumping to conclusions Okie but your tone with her may not have helped if it comes across like your emails. my offer to help still stands - i can call her and tell her you care about her a lot and are concerned because you had not heard from her. dont blow this man! this is not an easy project and you found someone that you obviously have strong feelings for. you need to fix this and throw caution to the wind and return to Cali sometime in the near future if you are serious about finding a wife. this cannot be a part-time project to succeed. you cant take the money with you. good luck

[papi]

... in response to Re:  The saga continues, posted by papi on Jun 11, 2005

By the way, Pete can vouch for me - we spent time together in MDE

[OkieMan]

... in response to Re: Re:  The saga continues, posted by papi on Jun 11, 2005

Papi,

Thanks for your interest.  Pete is trying to help me. He and I have been exchanging phone calls and emails.  Hopefully, his girlfriend and my calena can have some "girl talk", either in person or by phone.  Maybe I can really find out what is going on.  Since they already know each other, I believe that is the best way to handle it.  And now I have to also let you know, that later this evening, I received a sweet email from this lady.  Once again, that is also very confusing.  So, I am trying to get to the bottom of this.  I still have feelings for this lady.  I will feel like a real jerk if I have misjudged her.  Maybe she did have some problems that kept her from writing me.  But, after what I have been through to contact her all this past week, I am worn slick!  This is certainly a tricky deal.  I will make no predictions other than I am doing my best to get to the bottom of this little "latin soap opera".  I just hate guessing.  It is one of my worst pet peeves!  Lord, teach me patience!

                               OkieMan

[Craig]

... in response to Re: Re: Re:  The saga continues, posted by OkieMan on Jun 11, 2005

Hello Okieman

Just remember there are no formulas that have any consistency when dealing with human emotions and actions. What is happening to you or has happened to others is not a prelude for your future. Having said this I can tell you the entire process is a “crap shoot” If you know this going in it might help with your perceived expectations. I did all the things people would conclude as “safe” I dated my Calena girlfriend for over 2 years and then filed a fiancée visa (filed on my own and was approved…very proud of this) We met many times over those years. I live in Florida a climate somewhat similar to Cali.  My friends have wives who are Calenas. My good friend from work was in charge of the airport in Cali before he immigrated to the USA 14 years ago. So I had a support base for her. I speak enough Spanish to get in trouble and I thought I had it all together. Problems I encountered could have not been predicted. First she could not handle the weather. She complained it was hotter then Cali but could not adjust to the air-conditioning. She was going to sleep with sweatshirts at night. She was sick almost the entire time she was here. My daughter said she was throwing up after each meal, which accounted for her slim figure. She was extremely resourceful but had no ability to learn English it just was not going to happen. She changed the moment she got off the plane and was asking for money for her mother and she wanted me to pay for her children’s school in Colombia all 3 of them. Despite never discussing this obligation. Don’t assume anything and leave nothing to chance. MY fiancée lasted 21 days in Florida after a three-year relationship. I have not given up and neither should you. The question you need to ask yourself is if you think you have the stomach for all of this.

Take care

[OkieMan]

... in response to Re: Re: Re: Re:  The saga continues, posted by Craig on Jun 12, 2005

Craig,

Thanks for sharing your story.  Out of curiousity, how old was this lady when you started your relationship? That is not the be all and end all, but it would help me to relate.  The calena I am trying to deal with is 35.  I still don't know how this will play out, but you have given me new things to consider.

                            OkieMan

[Craig]

... in response to Re: Re: Re: Re: Re:  The saga continues, posted by OkieMan on Jun 12, 2005

I was 41 and she was 28. We still remained close up until she left for Italy. She said she saw me in Cali a year later with another girl and was extremely angry. Go figure? That was about 3 years ago. I still go to Cali was there in March for some dental work and will be going again in July.

[Jake]

... in response to Re: Re: Re: Re:  The saga continues, posted by Craig on Jun 12, 2005

Craig , I never thought that someone could relate to a story like yours .... BUT a buddy of mine his relationship only lasted 2 weeks.
After all that work with 2 boys ect ....... how can this be ?? she is now running around illegal some where in South Florida ...
Jake

[Craig]

... in response to Re: Re: Re: Re: Re:  The saga continues, posted by Jake on Jun 12, 2005

Well Jake it seems that your friends girl was using him to get in the country. Mine went back to Cali after 21 days and the told me she was very much in love with me. Soon after she told me she was going to Italy. I assume it was with someone else she was planning to marrry but we lost contact.

Jake there is no ryme or reason in this endavor. My good friend who posts on this board married his lovely wife after 2 weeks and they have been married over 4 years. She is a great girl. It's all about character. No one ever knows for sure until the passage of time and some rough waters. How do you know whats in someone's heart? Sometimes they don't even know until they make the decesion.

Me I'm  off to Manizales to meet a very close friend.

Take care

[papi]

... in response to Re: Re: Re: Re:  The saga continues, posted by Craig on Jun 12, 2005

misery loves company. by no means is this an easy project

[Craig]

... in response to Re: Re: Re: Re: Re:  The saga continues, posted by papi on Jun 12, 2005

Misery??? Who's miserable?

Let's see if I can comment on your post that makes about as much sense. How about those "Mets"? They could be higher in the standings if they could win more games.