To support or not to support?

[Pete E]

... in response to To support or not to support? , posted by Onephd on Jan 23, 2005

When I married my ex she had one of 2 jobs in the family.They would have really taken a hit financially if we did not send them money,which we did.
A friend of mines wife was the sole support for her mother and 3 other kids.They support her totally,but its only $300 a month US.
Yes,its important,and it will vary from girl to girl what is needed.And if an emergency comes up who will they look to?Yup,you.
But even in Colombia family members with more income help those with less.My girlfriend is looked to to help support her mother because she has no kids and can afford it more than her sisters.
And if your new wife finally gets a job in the US,where will the money go?Big chance alot will head south.But its a different culture.They look to the family to help.In the US people look to the government.No welfare BS down here.

Pete

[Onephd]

... in response to To support or not to support? , posted by Onephd on Jan 23, 2005

I'll be the first to respond to my post.

I tend to believe that if and when a man begins this journey, he should be ready to accept this responsibility.
It's something I thought about while in school when I first starting thinking of going this route.

I personally, would support the family to the extent that the women supported them unless it was not necessary as deemed by the lady.  

My current novia, believes that the man and woman must first develop and strengthen the primary household (that being me and her) and then try to help the extended family.

Now her situation is that she is not the primary bread winner but only contributes to the family income along with her brother and sister. when I first asked about this, I asked her what and how would her family survive if she left Colombia, she replied that her brother and sister worked and would take up the slack so to speak for.    Now granted her feelings could change on the matter but for now thats where she stands.

[Red Clay]

... in response to Re: To support , posted by Onephd on Jan 23, 2005

Agree with your philosophy. My wife was the main income earner for her family and she uses part of the money she earns here for that purpose. Actually I think she sends more now than she was able to provide while working in Peru. If she could not work here for some reason, I would expect to send them enough myself to keep her Mom afloat. Her brothers work but they don't make much of course.

My wife is the most unselfish person I have known regarding money. She insists upon paying with her own money at least half the time when we go out, also buys all the groceries, her clothes, her own gas, car payment, insurance, etc. The mortgage, utilites, etc. are mine to pay. Nobody in her family has ever asked me for anything.

[Dr Aaron]

... in response to Re: Re: To support , posted by Red Clay on Jan 23, 2005

.

[Red Clay]

... in response to I like that. You picked the right lady. , posted by Dr Aaron on Jan 23, 2005

Thanks, I agree.