stepford wives

[jim c]

Dear Girls
     Now that the Soap or Novella (as you will) is over, can the Stepford Wives go back to cleaning and organizing their own lives. I am sure that the players are sufficiently chastized for their unsympathetic big mouths and others on their lack of planning.
          " Bad things happen to Good people" !!!.
   It always amazes me listening to comments that come from the walking wounded on this board. I won't even give them the dignity of calling them monday morning quarteracks. If the members who comment on  misfortunes and lack of planning, organized their lives  as well as they expect others to, they would not be here. If you want to drive a mercedes, go ahead, I do.
        Lately, a stranger reading this forum would think this was the Steel Magnolias Club or how about the YA YA sisterhood. This place is about men sharing info on where and how to find Latin women for a relationship, what the countries are like, what is the best way to go with airlines, cultural differences,which agencies etc.  It is expected that we are all responsible for our choices. Reading a trip report is always enlightening as long as we don't get into shareing to much. We can help each other with good advice to make the path easier to travel, but to ask for advice on personal problems here is like being counceled by the inmates of an institution. The patients know a lot of medical jargon but are too nuts to practice it in ther own lives.

      I don't want to know how much your new girlfriend reminds you of your mother and I am not going to ask Jesus which agency to use. If you can't find a woman here because you read too many issues of Cosmo and have a compulsion to SHARE, what makes you think you can be successful in Latin America where machismo is the norm. I would rather listen to trolls than whining weasels.
   Contrary to local belief it is my opinion that a latin women is interested in finding a man that will take care of her and offer the opportunity for a better life. This is not about muscles it is about power and money and a change of futures. She is not American. She expects you to be responsible for everything. Why else would she marry with out complete communication or knowledge of your life.  Maybe, you are just too cute to resist? The rant of the day JIM C

[lswote]

... in response to stepford wives, posted by jim c on Jul 1, 2003

Jim, I am sure I fall into one of those categories since I started this novella.  Please accept my apology.

[jim c]

... in response to Re: stepford wives, posted by lswote on Jul 1, 2003

Hey Izzy

    You have nothing to apologize about. You needed to vent and you chose to vent here. I on the other hand would not choose to do that.  Particularly here.  The majority of my venom is directed at the arrogant members that criticize actions of others while not knowing the whole story and the politically correct bunch that get their experience from  a computor and a television set.
   We have had all types here from the wild eyed Bible thumpers to the wife beaters. You might as well stop people in an airport and ask for personal abvice. Your chance of getting unbiased, pertinet information is about the same. Seek the help of professionals when you have a problem is my best advice and remember that a lot of people here just need to comment, It doesn't mean they really know anything. opinions are like a-holes every has one.

Good luck with your situation and remember You can visit when you are in Key West. JIM C

[wizard]

... in response to Re: Re: stepford wives, posted by jim c on Jul 1, 2003

As if your post about your lawyer ex-wife having to vacate your office building HAS ANYTHING to do with the pursuit of a latin woman...

We ALL have a tendency to digress from time to time...

Don't throw stones if you live in a glass house...

[jim c]

... in response to Re: Re: Re: stepford wives, posted by wizard on Jul 1, 2003

well well Grumpy Gandolph

  I am aware that you have come to the defense of Izzy in the past, but I don't think you understood that my post was not an attack on him. It was on the respondents who told him how to save money , he should claim bankruptcy, he shouldn't drive a mercedes or whether she should go back to Cali.
   I have never said someone should not go off topic. Actually, I sort of enjoy the flame wars, they are very entertaining. My only criticism of Izzy was that he revealed  his personal problems with his marriage and opened himself up to the Loro Coro. But I sense that you think you are a bigger bird than the rest.
  Well, as you threatened others in the past, wave your wand and turn me into a troll, it might be fun. As an aside don't you have new priorities in your life or are you addicted to this birdcage.    jimc

[wizard]

... in response to Re: Re: Re: Re: stepford wives, posted by jim c on Jul 2, 2003

No problem Jim... From your post I really couldn't tell what you were talking about, other than you were ranting about something... That's cool, but don't throw stones at other when you wander off topic too...

I do have to agree that Bruce may have shared too much information with the forum, as I have stated elsewhere... But when someone is in need and turns to what he thinks is his only source of support, sure I'll support him...

No Jim, I'm no bigger bird than you ... Nor am I holier than thou... Nor am I shirking my "duties" to my new wife... Actually, I introduced her to the forum and she gets a kick out of reading the posts... She really gets a kick out of the flame wars and the old farts shopping for "young & hot babes" ... I still drop by the asylum at least once a day to check out the posts... It gets kinda addicting after awhile... After hanging out here for the last year, it's hard to just pull the plug... Kinda like trying to stop smoking... I am posting much less now than mi esposa is with me... There are MANY other married guys still here...

And for a final point, I really don't HAVE to wave my magic wand to turn folks into trolls... There are MORE than enough here already... lol... Besides, I'm not that type of wizard... I deal more with bits & bytes...

No need to bait me... I enjoy the rhetoric too...

Peace, love and farm trout...

Mark

[lswote]

... in response to Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: stepford wives, posted by wizard on Jul 2, 2003

After my initial explanation of my situation the biggest mistake I made was to give more information to try to explain myself to a couple of the hardsells.  It didn't change their mind one wit and they had more ammunition to throw at me.

[surfscum]

... in response to Re: stepford wives, posted by lswote on Jul 1, 2003

Life is not like some movie where the story ends at the wedding or as the couple walks off into the sunset.  The issues that arise after the honeymoon are just as relevant as those leading up to it. His posts about his present troubles are on-subject. When the personalities and histories of other board members came into play, it did degenerate, but not on Iswote's part.  He has kept to the high road and I greatly respect his restraint when responding to them. I also admire and respect him for exposing himself publicly.

Another flawed Hollywood myth: the Lone Ranger who hides behind a mask and never settles down. So many men are caught up in their careers and the busyness of life they have no close friends. They may have friends, but no one they can be completely honest with. When crisis strikes, they have no one on whom they can depend. Iswote had the guts to admit that publicly! He is not a weak man, he is an AUTHENTIC man. In his moment of need, he couldn´t maintain the facade of being the man in control who didn´t need anyone´s help. That kind of lifestyle is a lie: men need close friends.

And if you think that you can´t show your "weak" side to your latina for fear of losing her, that´s conditional love. The "trophy wife" might walk out on you, but I think most men would be surprised (and feel more freedom in their relationships) by the reactions of their novias/wives. You think the woman you´re living with doesn´t see your shortcomings? That´s one of the blessings of the marriage contract: it is designed to give us a place where we can be totally open about who we are, knowing that we have the security of a lifetime commitment. The woman who will give a man that kind of love is worth pursuing in any country and at any price.

[Ralph]

... in response to Iswote, you have nothing to apologize fo..., posted by surfscum on Jul 1, 2003

latinas as are most women are attracted to a strong, confident man. If one thinks that you can't show them your "softer side", you are wrong.

I always say one can be "sensitive" and still be "tough". One can be sensitive enough to cry at a sad movie but tough enough to kick the crap out of anyone that makes fun of you for doing it;-) Well, anyone but JunFan. . . . . .I mean he's really buff, and has pics to prove it;-) He he he he

Jim made some good points as well, but some broad generalizations. He talks about a woman marrying you without full communication or knowledge of your life. That might be true, in cases where guys get engaged on their first or second trip or get married with having spent very little time together. Not everyone takes that approach.

I also do not think that Bruces thread deteriorated at all. The vast majority of posts were positive and trying to be helpful.. . . . . well all the posts were.. .  . .except for Aaron's.