tax filing status for co-sponsor

[Bear]

... in response to Re: My "technique", posted by Jay on Oct 1, 2004

[This message has been edited by Bear]

When I went to Atlanta for training.  My wife and I met up with Don and his "ex" several times.  His "ex" started calling my wife after we came back to Houston to discuss her "marriage" problems and told Honey how she found out that boyfriend back in the R.P. was found to actually her cousin and she was so depressed about it because she couldn't marry him now.  We advised Don.

Bear

[Dave H]

... in response to Re: Re: My "technique", posted by Bear on Oct 1, 2004

ROFLMGDAOTNTSAPIMMFD!!!

Sorry Don,

Having been through a divorce, I know it isn't a pleasant experience! But the "payback" in your case was a friggin' classic, all while you maintained the high ground! "What goes around...comes around"...but in this case it "came around like a typhoon!"

Dave H.

[Jay]

... in response to Re: Re: My "technique", posted by Bear on Oct 1, 2004

Hi Bear,

Thanks for enlightening me. Her cousin? Wow, that's weird. What made her decide to break down and tell Honey?

Take Care,
Jay

[don2222]

... in response to Re: Re: Re: My "technique", posted by Jay on Oct 2, 2004

Hi Jay,
 My ex was the stereotypical Filipina that would tell anything and everything to a person she had just met, as long as they were a Filipino also.
Sometimes there is an "us against them" thinking where they think that a fellow Filipino won't tell the Foreigner what has been said.  But, Honey went straight to Bear and told him what she had heard.

Don

[Jay]

... in response to Re: Re: Re: Re: My "technique", posted by don2222 on Oct 2, 2004

Hi Don,

Wow,I wonder where was I when all this was happening. I don't remember reading about it. Good on Honey for saying something to Bear. Alot of people would have just kept it a secret, thinking it was none of their business. Lucky for you, they had the guts to get involved.

Do you ever see your ex or know whats happened to her? I'm still amazed at her finding out it was a cousin. LOL!

Anyway, Take Care out there,
Jay

[don2222]

... in response to Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: My "technique&q..., posted by Jay on Oct 3, 2004

[This message has been edited by don2222]

Hi Jay,
 My divorce was two years ago, but this is the first time  I am writing about it.  At the time of the divorce I just want to get it over with and move on with my life, I just focused on work and other things.

I saw my ex while she was visiting the Phils about 2 months ago, she is now married to another American, but she had the sister tell me that the ex still loved me and the ex wanted to meet me in secret.  Yeah right !
Fool me once.......

And yes, I did try to contact the other American and let him know about my ex before he married her, but he did not want to listen to me.

You take care also,

Don :0)

[Rota20]

... in response to My "technique", posted by don2222 on Oct 1, 2004

What kind of "red flags" did you fail to notice and why in the end did she end up being the wrong woman for you?  Sorry to ask but I hadn't read about your story before.

[don2222]

... in response to Re: My "technique", posted by Rota20 on Oct 1, 2004

Hi Rota,

 Both my ex's best friend and my ex's sister told me that my ex was not mature or responsible.  At her age of 24 I thought she would be more responsible, but she wasn't.
Also, in going through my ex's childhood pictures she looked angry in every picture.  That turned out to be a big problem. Nothing I did made her happy, she always wanted more.
She is just one of those people that will probably never be happy.

Don :0)

[Jimbo]

... in response to Red Flags, posted by don2222 on Oct 2, 2004

Hi Don,

I think almost everyone discounts a couple of red flags along the way.  I know I did.  It's only natural to be biased to the optimistic side when making a decision where your feelings are involved.  All we can do is try to take an objective look at the flags, make a logical assesment as to the degree of risk, and then drop the flag or persue it further.  If everyone backed out at their first perception of a red flag, very few of us would end up married.

Jim

[Ray]

... in response to what if turned down/question for everybo..., posted by Luther on Sep 30, 2004

Luther,

If the visa is denied outright, then you could still apply again depending on the reason for the denial and whether or not you fixed the problem that caused the denial. I know of no 2-year waiting period before you can submit another petition. You could try again the next day as far as I know. If you file an I-130 petition in conjunction with an I-129F for a K-3, and the I-130 is disapproved, then the associated K-3 becomes invalid also by default. Sometimes they will deny the visa but hold the file open until you correct some deficiency, which could take anywhere from a month to a year or more depending on what you need to do.

Luther, I understand that your lady wants to have a baby right away after marriage. But how do YOU feel about that? Before you go making babies, make sure that BOTH of you are ready to start a family. There is nothing ‘dishonorable’ about getting your wife pregnant and then leaving for an extended period of time. It happens all the time. When I was in the Navy, my first wife became pregnant just before I left for an extended 9-month deployment overseas. She delivered 6 days before I returned so I missed out on all the pregnancy fun. Like you said, maybe not the ideal way to do it, but certainly honorable.

In your case, if you are both ready for children, and since she is in her 40’s already, there is nothing wrong with getting that bun in the oven right away as far as I’m concerned. How badly does she want children? Just make sure that she fully understands that getting pregnant is never guaranteed, especially at her age. You might suggest that she get a thorough gynecological checkup now. Her gynecologist can order a couple of tests that should tell her whether she is still fertile and can have children. You can also have your doctor order a semen evaluation for yourself to see if those little boogers are still swimming.

Ray

[don2222]

... in response to what if turned down/question for everybo..., posted by Luther on Sep 30, 2004

Hi Luther,

Sorry guy, but you are asking for opinions, and I think it is irresponsible to make babies in that situation.
You have not really had time to form a strong foundation for your relationship.  You have not met her in person, and in the few weeks that you may spend in the Philippines you will not have enough time to learn everything about her and her culture.  If you want to marry a woman that you really do not know, then you are both adults and that is your decision. But to bring a baby into the relationship before you have had time  to build a strong marriage to me is not a responsible thing to do.  My understanding of the Philippines, and I have spent several years living in the Phils, is that it is almost impossible for a woman over 40 to find a husband.  Maybe you are worried about her finding another man ?  Is that why you are so hasty in your decisions ? You are afraid she will find someone else ?  
Sure her biological clock is ticking, but when you talk about making such hasty decisions, you are not only affecting yours and her life, you are now bringing a third person, the baby, into what could be a decision made out of desperation.

Luther, I really hope it all works out for you.  But, you asked for opinions, and this is mine.  I am only sharing with you my thoughts, and I hope it all turns out for the best for you.  Time is your friend, and that is really what I am trying to say.  I am just suggesting that you slow down, and concentrate on your relationship with your penpal and your possible future wife.

Take care, and good luck,

Don

[Luther]

... in response to Not allowed, posted by Ray on Sep 29, 2004

As always, it is a pleasure to do business with you.  If the bureaucracy was as easy to get answers out of as you...well, that's a fantasy!

Assuming that your info is correct (and you sound like you know what you're talking about), I will inform my potential co-sponsors that they can forget the affidavit.  Since my current income is OK we'll leave it at that, and if I don't get the visa because of past years' inadequacies, who knows, maybe I'd rather live in the Philippines anyway.

Luther

[Keith NC]

... in response to Not allowed, posted by Ray on Sep 29, 2004

Ray,

I have learned so much just by reading your posts.  Hopefully I can remember all of it.  I may end up filing  a K-1 visa next year after vistiting the Philippines in January.

Take Care,

Keith

[LatinLuver]

... in response to Wealth of knowledge., posted by Keith NC on Sep 30, 2004

n/t