From the Chicago Tribune
( funny how the liberal media always reports the failures instead of sucesses of AM/RW marriages)
Cheryl Lavin
From Russia, without love
He gets unhappy lesson in foreign relations
Published November 1, 2001
Remember Don and Raisa? Don went to Russia to find a bride because he wasn't having much luck with American women. He met Raisa and today they're happily married. Unfortunately, David's Russian adventure hasn't had the same happy ending.
David met Martina while he was living in Russia, working for an American accounting firm. Before they met, Martina had been dating a German and she spent all her spare time studying German. After he dumped her, she met David and began studying English. He wasn't planning on marrying her until she got pregnant. That was a surprise because she was supposedly on the pill.
"I was suspicious about the circumstances of the pregnancy, thus I insisted on a prenuptial agreement. We each reviewed it with legal counsel, negotiated the terms, had the final version officially translated into Russian, then signed by the vice consul of the U.S. Embassy in Moscow. I thought this would protect me if her only goal was to obtain citizenship. At least my assets would be safe."
A complete turnaround
A year after their son was born, David and Martina moved to the States. Almost immediately, she became impossible to live with. "She called me names, insulted me, challenged my masculinity, often poking me in the chest saying, `You don't know how to satisfy a woman, you are a weak man, I need a strong man to satisfy me.' This was especially frustrating as she would not have sexual relations with me."
During one argument, David broke several lamps. Martina called the police saying she was being abused. When the police arrived she said he had thrown her against the TV and showed a small red mark on her arm. The police refused to arrest him.
A few days later, David saw that his copies of their prenuptial agreement were missing. He started paying attention to Martina's movements and listening in to her phone calls.
"What I heard made my blood curdle. She was telling everyone that I was physically abusing her although she refused her friends' offers of assistance. She wanted to provoke me into an act of physical violence so that she would have an arrest report. Russian friends, divorced immigrants, were telling her what to do and how to do it."
David also learned that Martina had hired an attorney. He told her she needed a police report and a doctor's report. She should go to a therapist and claim distress. Martina followed the advice. She began seeing a family counselor. She said David refused to accompany her, although at the time, he knew nothing about it. She saw a doctor who put her on an antidepressant but noted "No physical abuse at this time" in his records.
Waiting for her green card
The months rolled on. Nothing changed. David refused to respond to her tirades because "I knew what her goal was." As soon as she got her green card, she would file for divorce. He didn't want her deported because he was afraid she would gain custody of their son and take him back to Russia with her.
David came up with a way to deal with Martina. He was told he would not be arrested if he threw water on his wife to shut her up. So that's what he did. He kept a bucket of water at his desk and showed it to Martina whenever she started her name-calling and insults.
But the next time David threw water on her, Martina ran to her room, called the police, and cried into the phone "Please come to my house. My husband is abusing me. I'm locked in my room and scared to come out. He's got weapons!" Four police cars responded. The officers entered with weapons drawn. Although no arrest was made, David realized that the situation was out of control. He hired an attorney, filed for divorce and had Martina evicted.
Her attorney responded with a 70-page court filing, claiming that David had repeatedly physically abused Martina and kept her a "virtual slave." He filed a separate civil suit asking for damages.
Quite a haul
Despite a lack of evidence, Martina was eventually awarded full custody of their son, $450 a week in child support, David's car, most of his assets and her lawyer's fees.
"I know that I'm not alone because I heard my wife talking with many other Russian women who have repeated the same thing. They get a perfect immigration: a green card, a divorce and tens of thousands of dollars to go with them."
