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About 18 mos ago, I was spending Xmas in Sta Marta w/a BQ girl I'd just met thru TLC correspondence. While on a tour to Tayrona, I met a gorgeous 23-y.o from Mdlln. travelling w/a group of fellow Paisa friends. She was clearly flirting w/me, while the BQ girl turned out to be a bit of a self-centered bore. So I made an executive decision to part w/the BQ princess & pursue the sexy, hi-spirited Paisa. I had a great time partying w/her & her motley but nice group of friends (mostly middle-aged ladies & gay guys). They were all rooting for me, but then my Paisa lost interest in me & turned cool & indifferent. So I wrote her off & went back to the ladies in BQ.

A few mos ago, my Paisa began writing me, showing renewed, if belated interest. She claims my desire to jump into a relationship had turned her off, since she likes to begin as friends. I took this w/a grain of salt, but found myself interested again, remembering her perfect physique & fun personality. We had some enjoyable talks. I began to think about visiting her in Mdlln.

Then 1 nite she got emotional over the phone, revealing her family/money worries: she was studying & trying to support her emotionally disabled mother. I felt moved by her plight & trust in me.

Then it came: She haltingly asked me if one day I could "help" her w/her family problems. I cooly asked her what she meant. She hesitated, then admitted what she needed: "dinero". My stunned silence immediately informed her she'd crossed a line, and she apologized profusely for asking this. But the damage was done.

Later, I calmly explained that when someone with whom I don't yet have a committed relationship asks me for money, I can never tell if her interest in me is solely financial. And based on the way she'd unceremoniously dumped me the 1st time, I told her that I had a serious trust issue w/her.

But I can't stop thinking about her good points, er, her looks & (usually) fun-loving personality. And I get tempted to forgive & forget, even though asking for $$ is a big No-No in my book.

A quick reality check is in order. Do I spend my vacation week in Mdlln or the agency fleshpots in Cali? Gentlemen...?

... in response to Reality Check Requested, posted by John O on Jun 14, 2003

John

Answer: Cali

Reasons:

1 - She lied to you.  She wasn't turned off by your rush into a relationship.  She just wasn't interested.

2 - She called you up not because she wants a realtionship now.  She called you up because she wants money.

3 - Cali is great.

Don't give her 3 strikes.  The first 2 are bad enough.  

Steve

... in response to Reality Check Requested, posted by John O on Jun 14, 2003

At least that's the Mexican word for it, I don't know what they say in Colombia. From her 'crowd' and the off/on interest in you, could she perhaps have 'an acceptable alternative lifestyle'?

... in response to Reality Check Requested, posted by John O on Jun 14, 2003

Stay away from her.
Go to Medellin but don't waste your time with her.
In fact, tell her that you are going to Medellin to meet a number of different ladies and see what her reaction is.

... in response to Reality Check Requested, posted by John O on Jun 14, 2003

Well, I'm no gentleman, but I do frequent gentlemen's clubs...no wait, that's no way to start my answer...hey, you know what to do: nice girls don't ask for money. Unless you're engaged to her and she's asking for money specifically related to her upcoming marriage to you, if she's asking for money she's up to no good. Move on.

  As to whether you should go to Medellín: if you can generate other contacts (e.g. see my comments below about online sites), by all means go for it. I know people from there, and if you can do without an agency it's awesome.

... in response to Reality Check Requested, posted by John O on Jun 14, 2003

It's time to jalar las orejas! In fact I'd just straight out ask her if she means she wants to exchange sex for money and if she finds that insulting ask her why she chose to insult you with such a stupid proposal.