Title: Canceling visa petition Post by: stefang on January 30, 2005, 05:00:00 AM [This message has been edited by stefang]
I was wondering how you cancel the fiance visa? It seems my fiance and I had a bad fight over the phone. Our fight was over a phone call to her that I did not make Sunday night. I told her to call me when she came back from the movies and I would call her back but my phone never rang. The next Monday I called her and she got angry and clicked off the phone. I tried to call back and her friend spoke fast in Portuguese and I heard laughing in the background. I never liked her friend she has a lousy attitude towards men and I wonder if this influenced my fiance. This set me off since I never really did anything wrong so I decided not to call her until today. Today she still does not want to talk so this is a major problem since it seems childish behavior something DaveH has mentioned in the past with Latinas. I did not feel well all week after something like this but now I To explain more about the phone. Earlier Sunday I called her Title: Re: Canceling visa petition Post by: Rota20 on February 05, 2005, 05:00:00 AM ... in response to Canceling visa petition, posted by stefang on Jan 30, 2005
[This message has been edited by Rota20] Dump her! I used to be into Latinas too. Although there is good and bad women everywhere, Latinas seem to play a lot of games and not a good fit for American guys who tend to actually be nice and respect women. They prefer men who are very macho and more like the men in their countries. Asian women seem to go for guys like yourself who are actually gentleman-like and respectful to women. After discovering Asian women I wouldn't go back to Latin or Eastern European again. But at least you should leave this witch behind. It sounds like she doesn't deserve any decent guy. Title: Re: Canceling visa petition Post by: Humabdos on February 04, 2005, 05:00:00 AM ... in response to Canceling visa petition, posted by stefang on Jan 30, 2005
Run faster than hell! Hum Title: Not Surprised! Post by: Dave H on February 03, 2005, 05:00:00 AM ... in response to Canceling visa petition, posted by stefang on Jan 30, 2005
Hi stefang, Sounds like you may have a "drama queen." Personally, I did not consider the LA route or even consider a local Latina an option for me. I believe most American males are too nice to deal with Latinas. IMHO, most Latinas need and want (even if they deny it) to be kept in their place. If you are not tough, you will be considered a wimp, not repected, and walked all over!!! I'm too old for games (48...43 when I met my wife). Don't get me wrong, there are some great Latinas, but I have been involved in a few horror stories and have seen far too many first hand...especially since Valium is not being handed out like candy anymore. I find my wife (Filipina) to be the perfect blend of Latin spice and Asian cool! Plus she speaks better English than me. I would follow Ray's visa advice, plenty of time to cancel later if you still want to. Good Luck! Dave H. Title: Re: Canceling visa petition Post by: stefang on January 31, 2005, 05:00:00 AM ... in response to Canceling visa petition, posted by stefang on Jan 30, 2005
Thanks Ray for the visa info and thanks to other guys about the situation. I am going to send a letter to INS but it may not do anything. They have not processed it yet, when I called, the recording said the wait time was 150-180 days and I sent it in November. Looks like Apr-May before they would of opened my petition. To tell you the truth I am not that heart broken. You may think this These last two Mondays have been bad for me. Last week my Title: Re: Re: Canceling visa petition Post by: Ray on February 01, 2005, 05:00:00 AM ... in response to Re: Canceling visa petition, posted by stefang on Jan 31, 2005
Sorry about all the bad news at once. On the petition, nothing is going to happen anyway until it gets approved and forwarded to the embassy. Since you already paid the processing fee and there is no refund, you still have the option to just let it ride for a while on the outside chance that you may change your mind later. At least you wouldn't have to start all over again. Ray Title: Re: Re: Re: Canceling visa petition Post by: Jeff2 on February 01, 2005, 05:00:00 AM ... in response to Re: Re: Canceling visa petition, posted by Ray on Feb 1, 2005
Ray; From a purely pragmatic standpoint, you may be correct. But, I would advise cancelling the petition and not worrying about the money or time. There is enough wrong here that I would walk away from it, but even if Stefang should choose to go forward with it cancelling will buy him time to fully consider everything. It also shows that he is not a sap that will put up with games. Jeff Title: Re: Re: Re: Re: Canceling visa petition Post by: Ray on February 01, 2005, 05:00:00 AM ... in response to Re: Re: Re: Canceling visa petition, posted by Jeff2 on Feb 1, 2005
Yes Jeff, that was coming from a pragmatic standpoint. I wasn’t in any way suggesting that Stef change his mind, but I have seen it happen many times in similar situations. As far as buying more time, the one big advantage of the fiancée visa is that it does give you more time to think it over. Typically, after becoming engaged, it will take 6-9 months to get a visa, the visa can be used up to 6 months after issuance, and then the couple has another 90 days after arrival to get married, so there are plenty of chances to back out before making the final commitment. Ray Title: Re: Re: Re: Re: Canceling visa petition Post by: stefang on February 01, 2005, 05:00:00 AM ... in response to Re: Re: Re: Canceling visa petition, posted by Jeff2 on Feb 1, 2005
I agree with you and I want to move on. I think with my brain first and this is just too bizarre to comprehend. I can sense worse behavior than this in the future especially if her friends can manipulate her I know what the American women will do. thanks also Ray you have a lot of info on the application process. Title: Re: Re: Canceling visa petition Post by: Stephen on January 31, 2005, 05:00:00 AM ... in response to Re: Canceling visa petition, posted by stefang on Jan 31, 2005
I follow your logic completely. You're very lucky to have found out about her prior to marriage. May I ask a question....what part of the country do you live in? And have you tried to look in the Philippines? I think you could have good luck there. Yes, there are bad apples there also. But there are quite a lot of good ladies also. And they're easier to find in the Phils. Additionally....Just about all Filipinas already speak English. You don't have to worry about that problem. Good luck. Stephen Title: Re: Re: Re: Canceling visa petition Post by: stefang on February 01, 2005, 05:00:00 AM ... in response to Re: Re: Canceling visa petition, posted by Stephen on Jan 31, 2005
Hi Stephen I live in the metro Detroit area now. Since I lost my job I am looking elsewhere, Michigan is in the dumps for my field. I have a test set up for next Thursday with Verizon in Virginia. If I get lucky maybe I will get a job with them then you can harass me for being the lazy union phone tech. I have thought a lot about Asia and I basically felt it was where I would go if my relationship with my fiance hadn't worked. In the past I heard bad stereotypes about Asian women being greedy and other things, it is why I went the LA route first. I never knew myself but reading these boards I see it is different. Right now my priority is a new job, wether another state or Michigan. In the future I might look into the various ways of making a contact with a Pinay, maybe someone here might know a lady to contact. I want to study more about Asia also like Jeff says learn the culture, history etc.. Thanks for the support and effort. I will stick around and ask more Title: Re: Re: Re: Re: Canceling visa petition Post by: Bear on February 01, 2005, 05:00:00 AM ... in response to Re: Re: Re: Canceling visa petition, posted by stefang on Feb 1, 2005
Why not give Howard a call! He lives in Detroit and I'll bet Girlie has a zillion friends and family that would treat you much butter. The bear Family Title: Re: Re: Re: Re: Canceling visa petition Post by: Jeff S on February 01, 2005, 05:00:00 AM ... in response to Re: Re: Re: Canceling visa petition, posted by stefang on Feb 1, 2005
Michigan is pretty much the dumps for employment these days. The economy there is pretty tough, with construction, automotive, and tech, teh worst of the bunch. You'll be better off in the sun belt somewhere - Texas, Arizona, SoCal, Miss, Ala, Ga, Fla, are have better job prospects than MI. My customers are all in MI, and are busily shifting their manufacturing facilities to China or Mexico as fast as they can. - Jeff Title: Re: Canceling visa petition Post by: Ray on January 31, 2005, 05:00:00 AM ... in response to Canceling visa petition, posted by stefang on Jan 30, 2005
That sucks! Where is the petition now? If it’s still with CIS, you don’t have to do anything right away. If it’s already at the overseas consulate, then you should prepare a written request to withdraw the petition and have your signature notarized. Make sure you include the case number. FAX a copy to the consulate and let them know that you’re also forwarding the original by mail. That should be enough to cancel everything. They don’t really need any reason why. If the visa has already been issued, then it will be more difficult to stop her. If you think she is too easily influenced by her “friends”, then I would consider that a serious character flaw that should NOT be taken lightly. Poor choice of friends is another huge red flag. Ray Title: Run like hell Post by: Bob S on January 31, 2005, 05:00:00 AM ... in response to Canceling visa petition, posted by stefang on Jan 30, 2005
Is she really so hot that you'd be willing to spend the next 50 years living putting up with that? See Stephen's previous post at http://www.planet-love.com/wwwboard/asian/messages/48760.html and Jeff's reply at http://www.planet-love.com/wwwboard/asian/messages/48763.html The hottie-ness will fade in a few years. The attitude will be there FOR-EV-ER. Title: Dump her. You can do better. (NT) Post by: Stephen on January 30, 2005, 05:00:00 AM Title: Dump her Post by: Bear on January 30, 2005, 05:00:00 AM ... in response to Canceling visa petition, posted by stefang on Jan 30, 2005
Marriage ain't for children. Bear |