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In a post below, Oscar writes that his fiancee calls home for 10-15 minutes per week and that he expects her to visit home once every 2-3 years.  I am of the opinion that his expectations are very low.  I also posted below that my wife calls home to friends and family at least every other day.  I also expect my wife to travel home once a year and that my in laws will visit us every 18 months or so.  My questions are:
1) How often does your wife call home?
2) How often does your wife travel home?
3) How often do your in laws visit?
-
I would like to put this topic in prospective for my own information and for a realistic guideline for the newbies.

... in response to Questions for the married guys, posted by KenC on Jan 7, 2003

My wife calls her mother every week, we have the MCI international calling plan.  She only talks for 10-15 minutes.  She calls her best friend maybe once every couple of months.  I think one thing is that my wife did not live with her mother, and in fact lived a long way from her mother, so I think she is used to calling her mother and talking for a very short time.

My wife has absolutely no desire to return to Russia anytime soon.  We may go over next summer, because we are going to have a baby, to let her mother see the baby.  My wifes mother lives in a remote area, so I would fly her to Moscow or St Petersburg and meet her there.  

My mother in law is very young, so obtaining a visitors visa would be difficult.  

My advice for guys is to get Russian television via the DISH Network, I think it gets rid of some of the homesickness.  

My wife has been in the USA for nearly two years and things are great.

... in response to Questions for the married guys, posted by KenC on Jan 7, 2003

I do like the way you phrased that question,  "for the marry guy."

The single guy do not have an opinion on most question.
But the the married guy have,  it is their wife opinion.

... in response to Questions for the married guys, posted by KenC on Jan 7, 2003

I agree, Oscar's experience may not be typical.  Who knows if mine is either, but here it is:

1.  My mother-in-law has been over twice in two years.  Because they are now issuing tourist visas (for those lucky enough to get them) as one-year, multi-entry, it makes sense to get the visits 10 months apart to save on the hassle of going to Moscow to apply for/interview for a new visa.  We are also hoping to be able to get our friend's daughter over for a month this coming summer.

2.  The first year my wife and (Russian) son headed back as soon as school was finished, and my other (American) son and I followed a few weeks later.  Now that my wife is working full-time, it looks like we will probably make it over every other year.  This summer we are hoping to do St. Petersburg for the 300th anniversary.  Getting a Russian tour package to Turkey is also a future priority.

3.  She calls at least 2-3 times/week.  Getting cheap rates is always important.  We had good luck with nobelcom.com until February of last year, then the cards stopped working and customer service was unhelpful.  This fall, I asked if they would make good on the cards, they exchanged them for new ones, and we have been going through about $40/month at 6 cents/minute.

Steve M.

... in response to Questions for the married guys, posted by KenC on Jan 7, 2003

1)  My wife's calls home to Bulgaria average about once per week for about 45 minutes.  I encourage her to call as often as she wants, but she's cheap:-)  She also is able to email and/or chat with her parents and brother 4-5 times per week, sending photo's just about every time.

2)  We plan on returning once per year.  This year we'll go back together for about 2 weeks, but in the future she'll probably take her 30 day break from teaching in August there, with me visiting for the last 2 weeks.

3)  Parents say the only thing that could get them over their fear of flying is a baby.  Guess it's gonna be a while yet:-)

... in response to Questions for the married guys, posted by KenC on Jan 7, 2003

My wife calls home every day and spends about $20 a month on phone cards. (she uses one that is about $.07 a minute to Moscow) She visits home about once a year for a month. We have yet to try to bring her mom here but that will probibly take place this year.

Mike

... in response to Questions for the married guys, posted by KenC on Jan 7, 2003

1.  Once every week or two, depends alot on the connection, but she calls whenever she wants.  Don't know the minutes but it runs about $80/mo ave.  Only calls her family, sends letters to her friends.

2.  Once every two years is the plan.  I have family in Alaska so kind of an alternating thing.  This is her year to go again.  Last time she went for 2.5 months and I joined her for the last 2 weeks.  Worked out fine.  This also let me help her back through the borderguards without getting hit for bribe money, and yes they were in the process of doing so before I stepped in and stopped it.  

3.  Her parents have refused to come.  Afraid to leave their house unattended for any length of time.  Also, their health isn't that great.  Her sister may come if things work out, difficult to leave her job when unemployment is so high.

... in response to Questions for the married guys, posted by KenC on Jan 7, 2003

1) 2 or 3 times per week
2) Once a year
3) Once a year

- Jeff S.

... in response to Questions for the married guys, posted by KenC on Jan 7, 2003

Hello Ken

Since we married more than two years ago Lena has called her parents and grandparents for approximately one hour a week in addition to calling her friends in Ukraine and elsewhere in Europe occasionally. We decided at the time we married about installing a computer with Internet and mail at her parent’s home. In addition to daily mailing Lena exchange pictures with her parents all the time after we added a digital camera for her parent’s computer also.
If it hadn’t been for the mail there would have been more phone calls.

We have had three vacations together in Ukraine for approximately two weeks at a time.

This morning we drove her parents to the airport after their second Christmas and New Year celebration here in Norway.

A few more things to help her feel more independent were her own car, a cell-phone and a job during the first year.

Today she is working together with me in my small company and earning her own money, so except for travelling she decides herself about most things.

Jan

... in response to Questions for the married guys, posted by KenC on Jan 7, 2003

1) Talks w/ her son at least weekly
2)  Has been back to Ua. 3 times in 3 yrs (going back in May as I wrote you this morn).
3) Her parents are no longer in this life but we hope her son will visit someday.

... in response to Questions for the married guys, posted by KenC on Jan 7, 2003

1) Talks w/ her son at least weekly
2)  Has been back to Ua. 3 times in 3 yrs (going back in May as I wrote you this morn).
3) Her parents are no longer in this life but we hope her son will visit someday.

... in response to re...question, posted by tfcrew on Jan 7, 2003

What gives?

... in response to Questions for the married guys, posted by KenC on Jan 7, 2003

My wife calls home about once a week too, but she usually talks for about an hour.  I get a really cheap calling card though that only costs 8 cents a minute, and she usually uses the whole $5 card at one time.  We have been back to Ukraine in November, 2 years after my wife got here, and we don't have plans to go back anytime soon.  We would like her mother to visit sometime, but it would be too difficult for the whole family to come.

... in response to That seems about right, posted by Jeff on Jan 7, 2003

I told my fiance that if she wants to go back to Ukraine every year, that would be ok, but it would mean that we would be doing small domestic trips whereas if she goes home every other year, we could take a vacation on the off years to places like Hawaii, the Caribbean, Mexico etc..

She understood this and felt it quite reasonable..  Who knows, she may change her mind later but for now, she likes the idea.  But she is pretty frugal though.  I gave her $600 for her trip to Warsaw and for her and her sons Visa's, hotel etc..  I told her if she had anything left to buy something if she wanted.  She came back with $250! LOL!  Instead of paying $100 per night for 2 nights in a hotel, she found very nice accomodations at a local University, gave the landlady a bottle of Vodka and stayed 2 nights for $50 total..  She refused to buy any clothes in the Paris airport, said they were too expensive.  I bought her some nice clothes for Christmas but she refuses to go shopping for clothes here until the really big sales are on in February.  

Time will tell how the going home thing pans out.  At least that is our current plan.  It's not set in stone or anything.

... in response to Questions for the married guys, posted by KenC on Jan 7, 2003

My wife calls home 2 or 3 times a week for about 1/2 an hour each call. She also talks to friends in the USA, but at 7 cents a minute, who cares. So our total monthly long distance bill comes to about $60 / month.
As for traveling home, Marytna and Katya have been here for a year & 1/4 and plan on spending the summer in Ukraine. Since we live about 45 hours of travel time away, she doesn't really want to do this more than every other year. So their 10-12 weeks each time should help to make up for the infrequency of their visits.
As for her mom visiting, she is single, retired and owns no property, so we think her chances are pretty slim.

... in response to Questions for the married guys, posted by KenC on Jan 7, 2003

Once a year or year and a half.

With all the phone cards available, there should be no excuses with that.

Inlaws, tell them to start saving on there end.
-----------
You can tell I've never been married. hi hi
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Check out my lettuce
http://www.geocities.com/windshieldsbill/

Tomatos are coming along also... golf ball size, no red, yet.

... in response to Re: Everyone should be saying , posted by wsbill on Jan 7, 2003

I bet with your set up no RW would miss her dacha. Be sure to show her the photos. BTW where is your mate prasad from, the name sounds like Indian?

... in response to dacha, posted by Cold Warrior on Jan 7, 2003

I know eats alot of chicken!

... in response to Questions for the married guys, posted by KenC on Jan 7, 2003

Well, I don't know if I count... since I am barely married. However, since you referenced Oscar, who is not yet married... I guess I can weigh in with my data, FWIW...

1. Calling Home

My wife calls home at least once a week, and talks to her father for about 30 minutes. Stas also talks to his grandfather about 10 minutes a week. Over the holidays, she called her mother, her best friend, and her ex-inlaws as well. She calls her friend about every other week, and talks for 15 minutes (she sets a timer... she is VERY worried about running up a large phone bill). With her father, though, I encouraged her to talk as long as she wants to.

When her father was sick, she called home a couple times a week to check up on him.

I encourage all of this, btw. I see no need for her to feel isolated. I have an International calling plan with MCI that gets me $.12 a minute. I know there are better rates, but this is convenient and reliable, and that means it is about $5.00 a week, which is nothing.

2. Travel Home

Unhappily, we can't do this yet, but we are already planning our first trip back. As soon as we can go, we will. I expect that she will go back once a year at a minimum, and I plan to go with her as much as possible. The first couple of years, she will probably make two trips back per year.

He family wants to see her, and she wants them all to meet me, and Emily. She is making a list of things she wants to show me when we go back.

It helps her to plan. It makes it seem not so far away.

3. In-Laws traveling here.

I would LOVE to bring her parents here. I don't think that will be feasible. Her mother is gravely ill. And I just don't think that her father makes enough money to get a Visa. But we will be pursuing this. If possible, I would love to bring them over once every year... or at least every other year. I would love to have them here for the Holidays.

In this regard... I don't view my marriage as any different than being married to an American woman. I still have in-laws, she still has family, she still loves them, and they miss her and want to hear from her.

Victoria loves it here already. There are MANY things she likes better. But she misses her family, and I don't want her ever to feel like she has left them forever.

BTW, one thing you didn't mention:

Email. She emails a few times a day. She has friends there, her English teacher writes her, and she writes her father daily. (She also writes to my family regularly).

She has become very good at the computer, and enjoys sending and receiving email. (And, btw, she has seen this site... and has some interesting opinions about it... more on that another time...)

... in response to Questions for the married guys, posted by KenC on Jan 7, 2003

My wife's parents are deceased (her mother died about 1 yr ago) so her desire to visit is now maybe once every couple of years which is close to Oscar's expectations.  Of course, if the parents were alive, she would visit much more often.  Regarding phone calls, they run average about 30 minutes a week, plus or minus.

... in response to Questions for the married guys, posted by KenC on Jan 7, 2003

writing about his fiancees expectations and not his own.

Too early for either of them to know isn't it? Me and my wife spoke about this at length before we were married and formulated an idea that her visits would be yearly, ha!

... in response to I think Oscar was , posted by Pordzhik on Jan 7, 2003

...I remember getting a lot of flak from him about doing the visa process wrong before his I-129F was approved.  Some people require less experience to become experts...

... in response to Not the First Time Either..., posted by SteveM on Jan 8, 2003

Oscar doesn't accept criticism too well --smile--.

- Dan

... in response to Careful Steve . . ., posted by Dan on Jan 8, 2003

/

... in response to Yes and Dan does?   Uh, huh!!  LOL!   Oh..., posted by Oscar on Jan 9, 2003

No one likes criticism very much. It is just that some are more prone to it for failure to provide accurate and factual information (that would be YOU Steve) - or for a propensity to engage in mindless, senseless pissing matches that have no apparent start and no clear finish (that would be BOTH you and I recently Steve - though I'm committed to not playing your games any longer Steve).

And yes Steve, I will accept criticism when appropriate - and have done so repeatedly over the 3+ years I've been on this board.

Now you can have your last word. I'm done with this one.

- Dan

... in response to "and Dan does [accept criticism gra..., posted by Dan on Jan 9, 2003

I am honestly impressed that you admit that we have BOTH been engaging in some "sensless pissing matches".  I would agree.  Do I enjoy it?  No.  Would I like it to stop? Yes.  Do I feel I have tried to stop it on many occasions? Yes, but of course I realize you may feel different about that one, I don't know.
I certainly agree with your statement that nobody enjoys criticism..  

In regards to your comment about my providing inaccurate info, I really don't know what that would be but I can say that I would never intentionally mislead anyone Dan.  If it is about the issue discussed at length here of needing a letter for a child to leave Ukraine, I will have to say that to my knowledge, a letter is still not required although I always suggest if a guy can get one, it's a smart idea.  My girl had one but was never once asked for a letter anywhere with her 7 year old son and she came rather recently.  That policy could certainly change but I am not aware of it having changed yet..

Have a good one..

... in response to Re: "and Dan does [accept criticism..., posted by Oscar on Jan 9, 2003

n/t

... in response to Last post, right on cue  LOL  n/t, posted by KenC on Jan 9, 2003

Oscar,
I posted this above your post so you can savor the victory.
Do yourself a favor and look up "predictable" in the dictionary. And then "shallow". (Not intellectually profound) LOL
KenC

... in response to Last post, right on cue  LOL  n/t, posted by KenC on Jan 9, 2003

Yeah Ken and wasn't it just terribly offensive?  Why are you trying your very best to MAKE trouble?

Geez, take a pill, go to work, anything!  

... in response to I think Oscar was , posted by Pordzhik on Jan 7, 2003

Yes, I think it probably is too early to know what will be best for sure at this point, but it was actually she who suggested that more than every 2 years would not be reasonable (at least to her)..  But then you are talking about a woman who refused to even let me pay for her English lessons there, and paid for them on her own.. She could change her mind of course.. But don't they say that's a womans perogative?? ;-)

... in response to Questions for the married guys, posted by KenC on Jan 7, 2003

We have no rule as to how often my wife calls home, but it probably averages out to at least a couple of time per week.  My wife, through the local Russian community grapevine, discovered a calling card that enables to call Crimea for 9 cents per minute.  In addition, they communicate daily via email.  My wife's brother, who lives with her parents has a computer with internet connection.  My wife also has friends from Ukraine who live in various parts of the USA who she communicates with on her cell phone.

My wife has been her three years now, and has traveled home once.  She did experience some uneasy moments in Borispol on her trip home and now doesn't want to go back to Ukraine again until she can do so with an American passport.  She will be eligible for naturalization this year, and I have no problem with her visiting her family each year, and actually encourage her to visit her family at least every other year.

My in-laws have not yet visited here, but since my wife doesn't want to visit them this year as explained we have invited them here and have begun checking the requirements.  After that, due to their age, I don't think they will make another trip.

... in response to Questions for the married guys, posted by KenC on Jan 7, 2003

1) About twice weekly to her family and once weekly to her friends. 60-80 minutes at a cost of £5-£7.00 weekly.

2) About four times yearly, with a total time spent in Ukraine of about three months every year, I visit with her about half that time.

3) Hasn't happened yet. None of her relatives has yet expressed any interest in coming here to visit. That would no doubt change if my wife didn't visit so often.

I guess my wife does spend the longest time over there. She appreciates the time spent there with her family and says that later when she has a full-time job and/or children, she will not be able to go over so often, so she's making the most of the situation now. I would add that if (like for you guys) the airfares were more expensive and with the increase in travel time, then her trips would be less.

Btw Most of the RW's that we know of here, are making trips back home two or three times yearly, and often bringing the in-laws for extended visits of three monthd or so.

... in response to Questions for the married guys, posted by KenC on Jan 7, 2003

Ken,

I was surprised to read about $10-15 a month too. My phone bill is usually $60-80 per month, different from month to month. I usually call home about twice a week, but talk for a long time to my Mom and sister. I also call my grandparents in Ukraine, but that is only on weekends, for 15-20 minutes. On another note, I always try to call my parents myself as phone rates are much lower in US and more affordable for me than what my parents would have to pay back at home. So even when they call me themselves, I call them back right away.

As for trips, I have been to Vlad two times and I think I won't be going back for awhile. I get only two weeks vacation at work, so personally I would rather go to some new and warm places which don't take 24 hours of travel and another week of recovering and time adjustment. What we are thinking about is rather bringing over my sister and parents either for the whole summer or for a longer than two weeks stay. It would be more fun for them and more opportunities to spend time with them for me.

Also, on another note, it really depends on how close of the relationship the girl might have with her parents. I know I can talk for hours with my Mom or sister and we always have to cut it down, but for somebody else 20 minutes a week might be enough, I don't know. But $10 monthly bill is very low expectation - that would not even cover phone calls to the russian girls who live in different states in USA once she starts making new friends. It is nice to have a cell phone too, so that I know I can get a hold of my husband if anything happens to the car or if I am running late.

Russian Wife

... in response to Re: Questions for the married guys, posted by RW on Jan 7, 2003

Olya has used hers twice to call me to tell me of problems with her car.

During the first year or so, I worked mostly out of our home, so accessability was never a problem.

As I have begun traveling more extensively again - and as she has taken employment and also goes to university - the cellphone is a great tool for emergencies and overall piece of mind.

Great point RW.

- Dan

... in response to Questions for the married guys, posted by KenC on Jan 7, 2003

We expect that Olya and I will travel to Ukraine at a minimum of once a year - and probably more often than that.

I honestly don't know how many minutes or how much time she spends on the phone with Ukraine. I do know it is almost daily. Whatever it is, it is miniscule compared to mine, hence, not worth thinking too much about.

In-laws have not yet traveled here, but I'm sure they will at some point in the future. How often? They are pretty clear about never wishing to relocate to the US, so I suspect it will be pretty limited - especially since we will be in Ukraine often enough for the family to see one another.

Some guys in this endeavor are just cheap. They balk over spending $40 a night in Odesa - they complain about spending a few $$ on telephone calls - they are too cheap to take the girls they meet out to a nice dinner. While I don't suggest throwing money around with abandon, I do think some guys are just toooooo focused on frugality. While I can accept some guys are probably just squeaking-by - others of the same frugal ilk claim to be "professional" and presumably with a good income.

To each his own.

- Dan

... in response to Re: Questions for the married guys, posted by Dan on Jan 7, 2003

Of course Dan I realize you are referring to me and that's ok.  The truth is that my girl is the frugal one.  I never tell her how long she can talk on the phone or that she can only go home every 2 or 3 years.  She is the one who has decided what she has.  She seems to spend about 20-25 minutes on the phone calling home every Sunday and talks to everyone in her family and yes, they are very close.  I never say a thing about it one way or the other.  She never expected to go home yearly but perhaps that will change over time  If it does, I have no problem with it.

... in response to Re: Re: Questions for the married guys, posted by Oscar on Jan 7, 2003

(Such as *yours*) is low on my list of interest items.

Sorry Steve.

- Dan

... in response to Don't Flatter Yourself - A Newby's Opini..., posted by Dan on Jan 7, 2003

Well, I'm sorry you are having such a bad day Dan.  I posted a very appropriate reply to a subtle slam and this is how you respond..  As I said, sorry you are having such a bad day, I hope it gets better.

... in response to Re: Don't Flatter Yourself - A Newby's O..., posted by Oscar on Jan 7, 2003

As I said above, you hold not the slightest interest to me Steve. Your assertion that your post was a "reply to a subtle slam" is simply another of your grandiose delusions.

Why do you *think* I am having a "bad day" Steve? Another of your petty antics aimed at provoking yet another confrontation perhaps?

Get over yourself Steve. Your silly shenanigans are boorish.

- Dan

... in response to Yet More Passive-Aggressive Behavior . ...., posted by Dan on Jan 7, 2003

Ok Dan, I hope you feel better now.  Now perhaps we can just end this, before it gets worse, does that sound ok?  I really have too much on my plate right now with a new family, it just holds no interest for me at this point.  
I suggested you might be having a bad day because your posts are quite out of proportion to anything I said to you.  You might look at the posts again if you have a chance.. If not, that's fine too..

Hope you have a good evening.

... in response to Re: Yet More Passive-Aggressive Behavior..., posted by Oscar on Jan 7, 2003

The simple facts are that you have no idea the person or persons I had in mind when I made my comment.

For you to jump to the conclusion that they were about you is presumptuous, arrogant - and WRONG - but totally in keeping with your character.

For you to then claim that I am having a "bad day" is just - well - laughable - as you have no basis whatsover for that comment. Aside, of course, from your warped self-aggrandized perspective that suggest the world revolves around and is singularly-focused on you.

My comments were not, and are not, "out of proportion" - except in the eyes of one who is so self-absorbed.

- Dan

... in response to Not "Out of Proportion" At All..., posted by Dan on Jan 8, 2003

Ok, glad you got all that out of your system..  On to other things..

... in response to Re: Yet More Passive-Aggressive Behavior..., posted by Oscar on Jan 7, 2003

n/t

... in response to too busy to keep posting? LOL then stop ..., posted by KenC on Jan 7, 2003

Nope, not too busy to post, too busy to get into the crap, that's all.  I would think you would applaud that but whatever..

... in response to Re: too busy to keep posting? LOL then s..., posted by Oscar on Jan 7, 2003

Oscar,
You are too funny. You criticize posters for their "tit for tat" posts yet you are the most guilty.  You just cannot stop yourself from getting the last word in, can you?
KenC
(awaiting your silly next post)

... in response to always the last word, huh?, posted by KenC on Jan 8, 2003

You know Ken, you could help the situations rather than try to inflame them, but it seems to me that you kinda get off on seeing the garbage for some reason, just my observation.  
For you to honestly believe that Dans remarks were apporpriate and not over the top and completely unecessary is amazing.  I could have blasted him but I didn't, is that what upset you?

Awaiting my "silly next post"??  Ok, how about just a simple "bite me", will that do?

Feel free not to reply..

... in response to Re: always the last word, huh?, posted by Oscar on Jan 8, 2003

[This message has been edited by KenC]

Oscar,
You are soooo damm simple to see through.  No, make that just simple (as in simpleton).  "Self absorbed" doesn't begin to describe how much you are in love with yourself.  You have it in your pea brain that the man that posts last wins.  You are a joke and EVERYONE here knows it.  So babble on Doc---LOL
KenC
(oh and let us not forget paranoid too!  I hate to be the one to break it to you, but, Oscar, EVERY bad post is about YOU!)

... in response to your a friggin nut job, posted by KenC on Jan 8, 2003

Just because Oscar is paranoid... it doesn't mean that the board is NOT out to get him...

... in response to your a friggin nut job, posted by KenC on Jan 8, 2003

Didn't mean to offend your sensitivity there Ken..  You can't handle the truth, that's ok..
"Self-absorbed"?  I'm sorry but you act as the one and only authority here when it comes to RW..  Hardly accurate.  What IS accurate is that you are the leading authority on marrying a woman 25 years younger than yourself.. or was it 30??

Give me a freaking break.

... in response to your a friggin nut job, posted by KenC on Jan 8, 2003

[This message has been edited by Herbert]

doesn't mean you're not out to get him!

... in response to Re: Just because Oscar's Paranoid ..., posted by Herbert on Jan 8, 2003

Didn't see yours before I posted mine.

Glad to see someone else appreciates irony...

... in response to Re: Just because Oscar's Paranoid ..., posted by Herbert on Jan 8, 2003

[This message has been edited by Herbert]

This message was deleted

... in response to Re: Re: Just because Oscar's Paranoid ....., posted by Herbert on Jan 8, 2003

[This message has been edited by BURKE89]

into my glorious flick...

Walt

... in response to your a friggin nut job, posted by KenC on Jan 8, 2003

Ok, it's one thing to see nut's like me and anyone named Mark go at it, and quite something else too see a couple of professionals going at it. Not as fun and exciting when you professional type guys go at it.

Corrections are in order. Ken, Oscar, not every bad post is about Oscar, I have plenty of those, enough to share in fact. Here let me give one to, let's see, here I'll give one of my bad post's to Dan, and here is one for you Oscar, one here for Yoe, another here for KenC and LP, one here for Charles, Pordzhik, WildBill and Steve, Rags, and Griff and, oh hell, that's enough for now and I still have thousands of bad post's to me I can still give away (enough for everyone of you out there in fact so be careful)!

Correction number 2. It is not the last man who post's that win's, it is the man who dies with the most toys that win. I am afraid that that honor will probably (and always) go to Malcolm Forbes. Man, did that guy have some toys when he departed.

Oscar, you don't need to post last, just let it go. It's simple, just let it go. Get your points across, try to get them all in one post, take your best shots and let it go. If the assaults keep coming back, ok, take some of the assaults, save some of them, load up and fire again, but it's not always necessary to get the last post in on every little tit. Oscar, you post some good information and stuff on occasions but just as I have, you have a few guys who ride you kind of hard, question everything you write. If you are going to survive on this board you either gotta know what you are talking about (like Spyke, Stan, DavidSD) or be hard-headed, like, auhhhhhhh,....(me!).

So if it is ok, Oscar, Ken, let me have the last word on this thread and we can start a fight on a new post tomorrow!

... in response to Nut's! Someone say nut's?, posted by Jack on Jan 8, 2003

Jack,
Maybe you can explain to your "super fan" just how foolish he makes himself look here.  Being "always right" and "always last" (to post) is almost comical now.  He is like a wind up toy (wound a little too tight), just push his button and watch him go round and round.  LOL.
KenC

... in response to nice try, posted by KenC on Jan 9, 2003

Oscar,
I posted this above your post so you can savor the victory.
Do yourself a favor and look up "predictable" in the dictionary. And then "shallow". (Not intellectually profound) LOL
KenC

... in response to nice try, posted by KenC on Jan 9, 2003

All you have to do is just stop.  That's all, just stop.  We'll see how you do.

... in response to nice try, posted by KenC on Jan 9, 2003

Yea, I know. I saw it also.

... in response to Nut's! Someone say nut's?, posted by Jack on Jan 8, 2003

=== Get your points across, try to get them all in one post,
=== take your best shots and let it go.

I agree except for that last part.
Why take a shot?  Make your point and be done with it.

The one-upmanship games are uninformative and BOOOORING.

=== If you are going to survive on this board...
=== know what you are talking about ... or be hard-headed

Being polite, spell checking, and staying on topic might
also help one "survive" on this board.  Hey, call me
crazy, but it just might work.

... in response to A plan so crazy it just might work!, posted by vagn on Jan 9, 2003

spell check!  What's that?

... in response to Questions for the married guys, posted by KenC on Jan 7, 2003

Ken,

To your number 1 question, usually a couple of times a week, but there is no set rule, whenever she needs too, or wants too, she calls. If not for her and her family haveing the Internet at home, which allows for almost daily communications if wanted, I am sure there would be even more phone calls each week. I think most ladies will want to call (and deservingly so) often upon there first arrival into America (or wherever). From my observation, over time, once the wife get's more settled into the community, develops more friends, she will probably make fewer calls back home.

Answer to question number 2, usually at least once a year, but sometimes twice a year. Again, after she becomes more settled in to her new life style, developes more friends, the need for trips back home so often decreases. But the main thing that effects these ladies in there wanting to make a trip back home is that once they get a job, they just can't take off for two or three weeks as they had been able to do the year or two before. Now, after getting that first, much thought after job, the ladies learn that in many cases they cannot just take off for at least 6 months and when they do, they can only be gone for a week. "One week!! Why it's hardly worth the trip back home for one week" Natalia said. And I told her that is the way it is once you get into the American work-force.

Answer to number 3. I am sure the wife would love to see this happen once a year. From my perspective, I would think once every two or three years.

Good questions Ken and curious to see the response from other guys.

... in response to Questions for the married guys, posted by KenC on Jan 7, 2003

She calls home twice a week for an hour at a time, calls elsewhere just for special occasions, went home once for 2 and a half weeks, in the 18 months she's been here, and we expect that Mom will visit this summer,after having to cancel her visit last summer due to health problems.