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[This message has been edited by doombug]

Just havin' some fun.  So keep your pistols in your holsters, pilgrims.

"What She Sees: The Pool Party Edition"

Phase one of this Preparedness Evaluation Test: First Impressions

Step #1:  Lock the doors and close the blinds/curtains.

Step #2:  Set up a camcorder, and orient it towards a cheval mirror.

Step #3:  Put some music on.  Something native to Colombia would be ideal.

Step #4:  Tape up a body-length poster of a bikini-clad Shakira adjacent to the mirror.

Step #5:  Strip down naked and stand in front of the mirror.

Step #6:  Greet Shakira in Spanish.  If you don't know Spanish, just say any Spanish words that come to mind, or simply pretend and make up Spanish-sounding words as you go.

Step #7:  Ask Shakira to dance.  For the sake of the experiment, assume she'll accept, and commense to dancing.

Step #8:  Approach Shakira to plant a kiss on her cheek.  Yes, you have to actually kiss the prop-version of Shakira.

Step #9:  Tell her you have to catch a plane, turn around, and walk away from the mirror & sweet Shakira.  (Don't forget to tip the pool waiter.)

Step #10:  Stop the camcorder, rewind, and review on a big-screen television what you've just created.

What's the purpose of this first phase?  

To more clearly imagine how those single Latinas you're hoping to visit some day might see you.  After all, there's a big difference between what they "say" and what they "see."

Review the video every so often.  If it embarrasses you a little, then you know what to work on.  If you decide to work on those flaws, then repeat the experiment again and again and again, once a week or once a month, until you see and hear an interaction between you and Shakira that would be plausible.

THEN, book a flight.

Any follow-on or intermediate phases I leave open to the discretion of others.  

Peace out, yo!