No habla spanish

[Nevergivingup]

I would love to hear from gringos who new no spanish and brought their LA "non-english" speaking woman here to the usa. What were the first 6 months like???

[Pete E]

... in response to No habla spanish, posted by Nevergivingup on Feb 20, 2005

I took another look at this issue last night,a little different perspective came up.
My girl friend wanted to sit and talk with my friend and his girl friend.The girls went in to a whole different level of communication.Laughing,joking,talking about things in their life.I realised by girl is very intelligent,witty and funny.And she doesn't get to express that much in our more limited communication.She could get real bored with our lack of quick fun banter.We were listening to Jaunes.They were explaining the lyrics to us.Even my friend who speaks alot more spanish than I was not getting much of it.
So,even if she should get to 80% fluent in english she will lose some of that sharp witty conversation she cann have in spanish.She needs to speak that with someone.And even if I could get to 40% spanish I could understandor pick up on it alot more,even if it would not be our primary language of communication.
SinceI will continueto live in Colombia I need to get beyond the40%,maybe to 70% or so.She would never get that good at english living here,she wouldn't need to.The numbers on profiency would be just about reveresed from living in the US where she would need to learn english,particularly if she wants to work.If I had any intention to work here,which I do not,I would need to get alot better at spanish.

Pete

[WS244]

... in response to No habla spanish, posted by Nevergivingup on Feb 20, 2005

Been going with the same girl for over 4 years now.  The great advantage about not speaking the same language, is there are little or no no agruments.  The last thing I needed at my age, was another intellectual woman to discuss the lact of equality of women, and all the other enequities in the world wrought by the anglo saxon male.  
ws

[OkieMan]

... in response to Re: No habla spanish, posted by WS244 on Feb 20, 2005

Now, wait just a minute.  You are not trying to actually tell me that you have problems with american women?  Not those wonderful, beautiful creatures that have made our lives a living hell?  Surely not!  If you say anymore negative comments about american women, I might have to sic my two ex-wives on you, and that would be a nightmare!  ha
No, seriously, I am not as far along as you are in this process, but I am emailing a latina in Cali, and I am hot to trot to see her very soon.  The point I want to make is that as unfortunate as it is that she does not speak english, and I speak very little spanish;  currently we are having our emails translated through the staff at Latin-Internet; and I am working on learning some spanish.  I figure if we stay together, we can work on the other aspects of our language barrier.  Naturally, it is better for any couple to learn each other's language, but sometimes we do what we can over a period of time.  I think it is a growing experience.  However, I do have a follow up question.  Not meaning to be nosy, but are you still dating the same latina, over this four year period of time?  If so, does that mean that you have no intention of getting married?  I say that because I know that some other posters on this board have been rather candid, and said that they were just wanting to date;but that they were not interested in getting married.  So, I am just curious.

                             OkieMan

[WS244]

... in response to Re: Re: No habla spanish, posted by OkieMan on Feb 20, 2005

Okieman,
First paragraph. The answer-is no, as I ignore them.
Yes the same one for 4 years. P.M. me and I will explain.
ws

[utopiacowboy]

... in response to No habla spanish, posted by Nevergivingup on Feb 20, 2005

How is this even possible? How could you possibly have a relationship if neither of you spoke the other's language? Unbelieveable.

[WS244]

... in response to Re: No habla spanish, posted by utopiacowboy on Feb 20, 2005

Well after over 4 years I am still with the same girl. Nothing personal, but I would suggest compared with those whom are working on their 20th trip to south america, their 2nd,3rd,4th,5th girlfriend, or number 3rd or 4th wife, language in the end seems to be a minor issue, and rather ones other misjudgements in life seem to be more of the issue.  
ws

[valleydude]

... in response to Re: No habla spanish, posted by utopiacowboy on Feb 20, 2005

If I read this post 2 years ago, I would say "Screw these guys, you can do it!" but now, no way! No way in the world would I do this. I happily agree with Utopia... "How is this even possible?"

I'm not ragging at all, I just realized how much I can sift through with the little spanish I know.

I began with a little calculator type translator and turned on Univision. I would see "llunes 7/6 Centro" y hear "Sabado Gigante!" "el Ritmo de la Noche" etc... I would think "What is this???" and I began to type these words in the translator. In about 2 hours I knew all the days in Spanish. Univision is the best learning tool, where in the world can you learn Spanish looking at Sofia Vergara or Odalys Garcia? I LOVE YOU ODALYS!!!!!!!!!!! (ooopppsss wrong board)

Well my point: For 40 bucks and your spare time you can start talking like Don Fernando in no time.

V-Dude

[OkieMan]

... in response to Re: Re: No habla spanish, posted by valleydude on Feb 20, 2005

V-Dude,

Good points.  I am about to get me one of those translators.  I saw one at Wal-Mart for about $20.  It looked like about the size of a small, pocket-sized calculator; so I am assuming it is pretty much the same type as  you are talking about.  Anyhow, I want to use that,and my Spanish/English dictionary, and the spanish learning program I have on CD.  I figure over time I will able to habla espanol fairly well,especially for an old-fart like me.

                            OkieMan

[valleydude]

... in response to Re: Re: Re: No habla spanish, posted by OkieMan on Feb 20, 2005

Yeah that's all mine was the $19.95 version. I lost it, but about to get another. I just typed in words at night and fell asleep to it.

It's not much, but I fired off the post above right off the top of my head just as quick as I typed this one and it wasn't  too long ago that I had no clue what "Lente Loco" meant.

(Love that show)

V-Dude

[jim c]

... in response to Re: No habla spanish, posted by utopiacowboy on Feb 20, 2005

I have found that my opinion on this subject has not been popular in the past.  I recently quoted Michael Mc Donald to decscribe gringoes  who make wedding plans on their second date. ------"What a fool believes --- He see's!"

   There are many reasons for being here on this quest. The search for a younger or more attractive partner. In some cases a partner that we would not ever in our life have the opportunity to approach, let alone win. Some of us have personality disfunctions, mediocre looks or a lack of social graces that are overlooked because of zero language compatability.  

   Hey we all can't be perfect right?  But to me, it is disconcerting to see grown men deceiving themselves as to the motives of the ladies as well as their own motivations. Time is the great leveler. Utilizing time often changes our initial opinions and allows us to absorb information and make better decisions.

   There seems to be an opinion here that a relationship with zero communication is possible and in  some circles even preferable. I believe that attitude is based on the amount of desperation exhibited by both parties.

   Pete recently described a choice between an emotionallly responsive wife or an intellectual partner. I personally believe if you have an intellectual partner you will have two emotionally responsive persons.  Just having emotional responses is based only on hormones, self deception or the object of your affection waiting to get her green card. If you love her only for her looks you may not even know who she is and that is a prescription for eventual failure.
SO STUDY SPANISH AND FORGET THE HYPE.  jimc

[utopiacowboy]

... in response to Re: Re: No habla spanish, posted by jim c on Feb 20, 2005

I wasn't on any kind of quest. I was on a web site hoping to find a Mexicana who lived nearby (I lived near the border) and I came across the woman who is now my wife. Of course knowing what I know now, I don't blame any guy for searching down south. Even if you can attract AW (and I know there are many fine AW), the quality of the Colombianas is incredible. They are the finest women in the world.

[OkieMan]

... in response to Re: Re: No habla spanish, posted by jim c on Feb 20, 2005

Jim,
I think those are wise words, but you remember what you just said, that many of us come from many different backgrounds, and abilities?  Some men just naturally have a better ability to learn a foreign language; or they may already know spanish.   But, even though I now know very little spanish, does not mean that I can't learn some more.  I believe it is a process.  In the meantime, I am doing what I can to find a special lady.  It's true, the language thing can be a tough hurdle.  But, let's face it.  Which is normally the "bigger" issue?  The language barrier, or the fact that a 45-50 year old guy is chasing a 21 year old "hottie"?  I will not try to speak for anyone else but me, but just because you can get in her pants, does not mean that your relationship will work.  To me, that is one of the more important issues.  That is assuming that marriage is the goal; or at least a serious relationship.  The rest is just playing slap and tickle games; which is fine if that is all they want to get out of it.  My goal is to meet and marry a lady I can take back to the States, and live out my days in peace.  So, for me, I am looking at much bigger issues than just skin deep. However, that does not mean that I can't enjoy the beauty too.  But, my lady is 35, not 21!  I am 51.

                               OkieMan

[jim c]

... in response to Re: Re: Re: No habla spanish, posted by OkieMan on Feb 20, 2005

Well said Cowboy

  It may be harder for some than others, but if you try, there is no greater reward than understanding someone you care about. Getting in her pants doesn't mean the relationship will work.  Boy do you get a gold star for that one!!!!  I wish some of the guys I have met in Cali could have read that sentence.  Living out your days in peace, while having a friend you can communicate with is very comforting and is a lot better than explaining why you don't want to go to the disco. jimc

[Craig]

... in response to Re: No habla spanish, posted by utopiacowboy on Feb 20, 2005

[This message has been edited by Craig]

Not only is it believable it happens often. Now I understand to you it's not gonna happen nor would you consider it. I know many people who are married speak English yet neither one understands each other. Divorce is over 50% give or take a little. Your chance of keeping your relationship together is about the same reguardless of the language you speak. It's more comlex then just language it's just one of many elements. I give credit to people willing to take a chance at happiness and willing to think oustside the box.