Tricks are treats
Hide. Closets are good, but in our home they are too full to hide in. I used to hide there. The trick is to suddenly disappear, like for example when she is in the bathroom, before bedtime. She knows that you didn't leave, she knows you are there, but where? And if it's the first time, she is going to search like crazy, so just when she is about to discover your hiding place, jump out and surprise her. If, like me, there is no room anymore in any of the closets, because she is a fashion magnet, and high fashion clothing come to her like magic, then be inventive, and find another place to hide. You know that Steven Spielberg learned well from scaring his sisters, anyway, I am sure that there is some place you can hide. Wait until she goes to the bathroom, then hide. Make her search for you. Then jump out and startle her. She is going to get creamy about that.
If you hide in the same place every time, she will know, that will be the first place she looks for you. You can use this to make your relationship more, or you change your hiding place, and when she looks in the supposed favorite place, you can jump out and scare her, or you can wait in the favorite place and when she discovers you, I guarantee there are going to be squeals of joy. I like to a roar like a tiger when she finds me, and she squeals with delight. I carry her to the bed, and you know what happens after that.
Scare. When she is in the bathroom and the door is closed, roar, with your mouth as close as possible to the door separating you two. As loud as you can. Roaring is great, I highly recommend it. She will jump, I guarantee. Now, don't get carried away when I say scare her. Animal sounds are what I recommend. There are levels of scare, let's keep it on the bed and sexual level, OK? Growling is good, especially while hiding. If you are accomplished at it, maybe a low growl is even more sexy than a scary roar. Experiment. Talk about a dangerous insect, like a poisonous spider, or scorpion, or some such, and then make a startling movement, to scare her. Works great for me. She will cry out with delicious delight.
How much time do you spend on the floor? Didn't Ringo sing a song about waking up on the floor? The floor is great. I exercise there, sometimes I sit there, eat there, sleep there, and other stuff I won't mention, I have Muslim friends who spend their entire lives there. It's a great place. I recommend it. Pull her off the couch onto the floor and play with her. Lay on the floor and invite her to come on top of you. The floor is a cool treat. I do not recommend wearing shoes inside the home. I am from Colorado, and the cows… well, we wore tall boots, we always took off our boots before coming into the house. We recommend that you do the same, and that you keep your dirty shoes and boots outside, and keep your floors clean, so that having a romp on the floor is groovy, dudes. You dig me?
Giving presents is OK, but not great. It smacks of propitiation. However, random small gifts given with the love that comes from your heart is something special, probably the greatest joy in this world. More than a treat, certainly. Playing the part of an animal is great, getting down on your hands and knees and snuffling about like a bear or a walrus is such a delight, a bucking horse is very cool, too. The main thing is to keep it dynamic. Keep it lively, make her imagine, search, think, and above all, make her realize that there is love flowing from you like old faithful, and she will respond to you in the ways that she knows, that you know that she knows, and the ways that will make the two you join into one union of hearts full of love.
Big B
