If at first, you dont succeed....

[DOMINGUIN]

... in response to Eyes wide shut!!, posted by Calipro on Oct 21, 2003

Calipro
I edited this right out the last post from you to me.  I promised I didn't change a word!

If you had stopped analizing her for a minute and actually got to know her,

WR, is this a misspelling or just you BUMbling your way through sex?

Dominguin

[Calipro]

... in response to Re: Eyes wide shut!!, posted by DOMINGUIN on Oct 21, 2003

It was just a psychological test to see were your minds at.

If I'm reading you correctly, you're anal retentive.

hehehe!

[DOMINGUIN]

... in response to Re: Re: Eyes wide shut!!, posted by Calipro on Oct 21, 2003

Not yet ready to put this behind us?

[JR n Atl]

... in response to Eyes wide shut!!, posted by Calipro on Oct 21, 2003

CP,

Let me frame things in another way. Are you going to tell me that if you met a woman in Cali whose personality was absolutely lovely, had most every trait that you find desirable in that regard, but was about 100 lbs. overweight (which, BTW, is a clue to her personality), that you would court her simply because she was “worthy of your love”? Of course not, and no one here expects that you would. Neither would any of us, I might add.

The question is not whether or not a woman is worthy of our love. Rather, it’s whether or not two particular personality types in the long run form a good “match”. I know many good woman, very sweet woman, here in the US, they are all worthy of my love, but not all of them would make a good match for me.  The point is that similar personality traits play a more important role than whether or not the sex is good in the long term success of marriages. Look at the stats, I think any divorce lawyer out there will back me up on this sex (or lack thereof) is way down the list as reasons for divorce. And any of the guys here who’ve been married for any length of time will likely agree that in the long run, good sex just isn’t enough. There has to be more or the relationship is doomed.

Now, don’t misunderstand me, I am NOT saying that good sex is not important. What I am saying is that is needs to be placed in the correct frame of reference. We men tend to use sex as the frame around which all else in the relationship is surrounded. I think that the point that DOM is making, and certainly the point that I am making is that this is incorrectly framing the problem. Sex, when properly understood should be placed INSIDE the larger framework of personality, family, etc. Good sex alone can’t make for a good relationship. But good sex in the context of compatible personalities, intellect, stations in life, etc. certainly can make for a GREAT relationship.

It’s difficult for the rest of us to take you seriously when you rake another member over the coals for deeming a woman unworthy of his love base on her personality when you regularly deem woman unworthy of your love based on looks. Now, if that is mischaracterizing you, my apologies and by all means clarify for us. But that’s certainly the impression you’ve left me with. Not trying to be combative here. I make the point again that over the years we’ve seen many of the guys choose a woman blindly based on looks and hots alone, and not too much later, find themselves divorced. Love and sex, while paramount, are simply not enough. There has to be commonalities, and the better we become at recognizing and making choices based on these, the more successful we’ll be.

JR

[beenthere]

... in response to Objection, yer honor!, posted by JR n Atl on Oct 21, 2003

If I ever needed advice on how to pick-up Calenas and get laid, Calipro would be the first person I would call.  If I ever needed advice on how to have a successful & blissful relationship with a latina (or gringa), well, Calipro wouldn't be very high on my list.
Guys don't take him so seriously, he is what he is, just so he's happy doing it, and doesn't hurt anyone (which is highly unlikely).

[A1A]

... in response to If at first, you dont succeed...., posted by DOMINGUIN on Oct 19, 2003

Dominguin,  I just went thru the same thing you did.  I had a little more time (4 trips) and heartache involved.  On the bright side, I'm looking at it as a chance to find a sweeter, more attractive, more loving woman.  My ex novia had kids too, they also got in the way, but not like what happened to you.  I'm looking for a change in scenery for my next trip...I think that may be good for you too..
Good luck,
A1A

[Wasp]

... in response to If at first, you dont succeed...., posted by DOMINGUIN on Oct 19, 2003

Could you elaborate on the "color code"?

[Onephd]

... in response to If at first, you dont succeed...., posted by DOMINGUIN on Oct 19, 2003

Hey maybe three times a charm.  I just got back and I believe that I have found the right person for me.  This was my third trip and I actually did a one trip one woman thing!!!!  Worked out great!!!! Who knows what the future will hold but I will take things slowly and enjoy the moments.  

[JR n Atl]

... in response to If at first, you dont succeed...., posted by DOMINGUIN on Oct 19, 2003

D.,

I'm sorry things didn't work out between you and your lady friend. Dust yourself off and get back on that horse, cowboy!

IMHO, Bogota is the best bet for your demographic. But maybe I'm a little biased, huh?

JR