Blueprint of key ingredients

[JSlo]

Much has been written on the quest of finding a latina. In order of importance, here is what I believe are key ingredients to a successful match when looking abroad. Or for a broad. KIDDING!!
1. Find a woman from a stable family and that has a good relationship with her father. This should always be in mind when selecting. I can elaborate later if necessary.
1a. Luck, as in being in the right place at the right time. Serendipity baby!
2. Basic ability to speak the language and a good understanding of her culture.
3. Work to have a positive stable personality and make sure you are happy with yourself. I've always been taught that the biggest room is 'room for improvement.' All here should investigate that idea.
4. Look for a woman that treats others how she would like to be treated, whether they deserve it or not. Watch carefully how she treats others, it is a good indicator of what you will soon see or continue to see.
5. Ability to spend time with the person before commiting. If you can't spend much time with her and do not speak the language, hopefully, you are one lucky bas***d. You will need it. I am not against the " I won week wonders" or the 'two day thunder,' hell, I've been bolted several times. I just don't see a living creature as complicated as a woman being truly understood in such a short time frame. However, luck does factor in and those types of relationships can work.

I hope to receive input from others. If so, I will edit, condense, and eliminate duplicates with the intention of creating something for the archives that will serve others long after we leave the board.

JSlo
"A man that doesn't stand for something, will fall for anything."

[Jersey Mike]

... in response to Blueprint of key ingredients, posted by JSlo on Oct 13, 2003

Agree with all of the above.  A couple of additional qualities (from one who has misfired!) to look for in a successful long-term relationship with a foreign-born lady:

1)  The woman has been able to hold a stable job, which suggests she has a basic sense of financial responsibility and understands how to get her butt out of bed every morning to go to work!  Don't underestimate this - many women have never held a job and don't know what earning a living is about.

2)   I like the suggestion below that she should be a basically happy and content person, but I will add that she should also have an outgoing nature.  I believe that shy, introverted, withdrawn women have a more difficult transition to life here and adapt more slowly.  Homesickness can be a major obstacle to a successful marriage, and is less of a problem for women who meet and make new friends easily.

[Zorrowins]

... in response to Blueprint of key ingredients, posted by JSlo on Oct 13, 2003

I fell hard for a lady who hadn't spoken to her father in years(said she would never forgive him because of the way she treated her mother),had a love/hate relationship with her mother and sister(was always jealous that her mother preferred the company of her sister rather than her's). In fact I used to tell her "I don't care how you treat others, you are going to treat me differently"! Guess what? You already know, if I had followed your advise it certainly would have saved me a lot of grief later :-(

[JSlo]

... in response to Very Good Advice!, posted by Zorrowins on Oct 13, 2003

In the world of psychology when a woman has a healthy relationship with her father, she is a better equipped for marriage than one that doesn't.
In fact, the way she sees her father has a direct correlation to her view on men. A point fathers should remember when raising their daughters.
Not to be overlooked is the advice on finding a happy woman, it is so much easier when dealing with problems when the woman is easygoing and happy as opposed to one that is mostly bitter. Great points so far.
The comment on drinking and religion have merit also if those are important in one's life.
Thanx,
JSlo

[Zorrowins]

... in response to Re: Very Good Advice!, posted by JSlo on Oct 14, 2003

Lessons learned(I hope-Time will tell). I absolutely knew in my head my past lady had very serious problems and that I could NEVER be happy in a marriage as she was. I felt differently in my heart. So I had this war going on. Next time-Follow the mind and sooner or later your heart will get on board the same train! Not visa versa!

[david hagar]

... in response to Blueprint of key ingredients, posted by JSlo on Oct 13, 2003

You have left out the most important thing about any woman. That is be sure that she is a strong Christian woman and that her faith is very deep and not shallow.  Also, I would be sure that she does not smoke or use alcholic beverages.

Beattledog

[Jeff S]

... in response to Blueprint of key ingredients, posted by JSlo on Oct 13, 2003

http://planet-love.com/wwwboard/asian/messages/43749.html

- Jeff