New wife in USA, now what?

[JSlo]

What are the things that one should consider when bringing a new wife to the US? Loneliness and homesickness are obstacles to overcome. What are other things we need to be prepared for?
Or in other words, what can be done ahead of time to prepare for a foreign wife?
I'd like to thank all that contributed to my blueprint for success thread and hope for even more input with this one.  
JSlo

[DallasSteve2]

... in response to New wife in USA, now what? , posted by JSlo on Oct 15, 2003

Here are some of the steps that I went through:

1 - Apply for Social Security card.
2 - Apply for health insurance.
3 - Teach her how to drive.
4 - Add her to auto insurance.
5 - Visit dentist.
6 - Enroll in English classes.
7 - Get birth control pills (or not).
8 - Buy new clothes (you can't put much in 2 suitcases).
9 - Buy coats (if she's from Cali she doesn't have any).
10 - Obtain prenup (or not).
11 - Get cable (if you're cheap like me and didn't have cable).

If she's bringing children:
1 - Buy children's bed(s).
2 - Enroll kids in school.
3 - Buy school supplies.
4 - Obtain more vaccinations.

It may be cheaper for her to do some of these in her country before she arrives.

Steve

[cancunhound]

... in response to Foreign Bride Arrival Checklist, posted by DallasSteve2 on Oct 15, 2003

I'll try to insert a few:

0.1 - Scout out possible latina connections before she arrives, a girlfriend will be of assistance - usually the English school will be sufficient for connections.
0.2 - Clean and organize house, but don't paint/remodel - that'll be her job (believe me, you just might come home one day to a completely different interior color - and it won't be white).
0.3 - Famaliarize yourself with your local public transport if you don't alreay utilize it - she'll need that for the 1st couple of months - you don't want her stuck at home!  A bicycle may also be a good consideration.  
0.4 - Consider what the financial arrangement will be - carefull on this one!

I'd move #3 - driving further down the list, she'll need to get at least a feel of the town and our driving habits 1st.

[CaliAdvisor]

... in response to That's pretty complete..., posted by cancunhound on Oct 15, 2003

I don't think scouting out "latina connections" is such a good idea for a new wife. First of all, you don't want her around a lot of spanish speaking people. When choosing a school, you should choose one with the lowest possible number of spanish speaking students. Go for with with pure asians or arabs. She will still bond with these people because they are strangers like her, but she won't be speaking spanish 24/7. The idea is to get her speaking english.

And most importantly, with Latina connections come Latin Men. The more latin men and women she is around, the more she will realize that maybe she doesnt need all your support because she has a support network ready or she might just start getting some on the side from another Colombian because they have sooo much more in common. Be careful!

[DallasSteve2]

... in response to Re: That's pretty complete..., posted by CaliAdvisor on Oct 16, 2003

I'm sorry I didn't keep my eye on this thread.  It got pretty interesting and active.

Having brought 2 Colombianas here I can speak with some experience on this.  And what I have seen, and what my wife admits to me is:

The Latin friends that meet them here will assume that they don't love us, that they only married us for the visa, and they are all too eager to introduce them to other men who they will love so that they don't have to stay with us evil men who are exploiting them.

That's what her Latin friends will assume when they meet her.

Steve

[cancunhound]

... in response to Re: That's pretty complete..., posted by CaliAdvisor on Oct 16, 2003

This would all be behaviour of a guy very insecure about the relationship.  As far as choosing the school, unless you're in Florida you will have a large number of asian or arab speaking  regardless - so choose the most affordable and convenient, don't blow alot of money on this one - she'll either have the drive and will to learn or she won't - que será será.  The bigger the support network the better IMHO, unless your idea of a sucessfull marriage is to play the role of babysitter as well.  The quicker you can get her established in her niche of friends, whether latinas or not - the quicker you can get back to NFL football, the lazyboy and cerveza come Sunday.

[lswote]

... in response to Re: That's pretty complete..., posted by CaliAdvisor on Oct 16, 2003

Since I ALREADY have a Latin wife Aaron, unlike you, I don't have to rely on advice I get from google searches.  And I disagree with what you said.  A Latin wife DOES need Latin connections when she gets here because she has enough adjustment going on without adding isolation to the list.  My wife has done incredibibly well on her English, considering a year ago she didn't know any.  We are able to discuss almost anything except extremely precise or detailed things with no problems.  But I don't expect her to talk English all the time.  She loves to be able to talk to her girlfriends and just babble about whatever is on her mind in Spanish and I would hate for her not to have that outlet.

[CaliAdvisor]

... in response to Disagree!, posted by lswote on Oct 16, 2003

Listen bro.. I am not going to waste my time with you. If you want to go head to head on anything about Cali - say the word. Why dont you ask me what is the last word on page A8 of the PRINT addition of El Pais today. The sad reality is I am in Cali. If you and your wife are happy.. Then thats great - but I wouldnt be. You guys seem to be in the dark about Colombian women. So let me spell it out real real clear for you:

THEY CHEAT JUST AS MUCH AS COLOMBIAN MEN!!!

You think they are looking for american guys because colombian guys are unfaithful. That is bogus. Colombian guys are unfaithful because there women are unfaithful. If you want examples I can give it to you. But first why dont you prove I am Aaron you half wit. You can't do it. And remember what Pete said about being paranoid? He was refering to me. Pete knows I am not Aaron. I think everyone knows it except you. So why dont you proove me wrong big shot. Or did you loose all your money getting ripped off in Cartagena?

[lswote]

... in response to Re: Disagree!, posted by CaliAdvisor on Oct 16, 2003

How come you are the only poster on this board supposedly lucky enough to live in Cali who dislikes it so much?  Pete thinks moving there would be heaven.  traveller would stay for the women if the business dealings weren't so bad.  Calivet has nothing but good things to say.  But you CaliAdvisor, supposedly living in women-central can only think to pitch in that the women are unfaithful.  Frankly that seems to be the drawing card for some guys to Cali, that they can play around and not have to marry a gal.  But instead of reporting how you have a different beautiful girlfriend for everyday of the month, all you can pipe in with is that the men are unfaithful because the women are unfaithful.  Owwww, ground-shaking revelation.  Wonder what google search terms you entered to find that drivel.

You remind me so much of Aaron who supposedly had all these great women friends in Cali, visited them regularly, but no girlfriends.  No he talked of starting a relationship with a Latin woman in NY.  NY?  WTF would anyone do that?  Pick the apples from the ground when you can get the best ones easily from the tree?  So tell me CaliAdvisor, why are you even in Cali?  Waiting for your visa to be approved for the Ukraine?

[CaliAdvisor]

... in response to And another thing, posted by lswote on Oct 16, 2003

Like I said earlier, I really can't waste my time with you buddy. Pete knows where my email address and domain name are from. But it seems now that you are admitting the truth and your Sherlock Holmes detective days of conspiracy theories are over. Please don't respond to this message, because you have nothing to add. Like I said I dont think I will have time in the future to continue responding to you.

[lswote]

... in response to Re: And another thing, posted by CaliAdvisor on Oct 16, 2003

Pete E. knows where your email address and domain name is from?  What a crock?  And do you mean Patrick or Pete E?  I don't think Pete E would know that.  If that is all you have to go on then shine on liar boy as IP spoofing is child's play for anyone familiar with the internet.  I could look like I was posting from the White House if I wanted to.

I said if Pete E could verify he met you or talked to you on the phone I would apologize, but you did exactly what I predicted you would do, which is to claim email was proof.  Must suck to be you, huh?

[Calipro]

... in response to Re: Disagree!, posted by CaliAdvisor on Oct 16, 2003

[This message has been edited by Calipro]

How do you know colombianas cheat as much as colombian men?

Are you having a lot of sex with colombian women in commited relationships?  hehehe!

I take it back; you couldn't be Aaron. He swore off having sex (with women anyway).

How's the weather in Cali? Trip report, Please!

[CaliAdvisor]

... in response to Re: Re: Disagree!, posted by Calipro on Oct 16, 2003

Well Calipro.. You've proved to be a real pro. I wasnt going to mention it before because I didnt want to get into it but that is exactly how I know Colombian women are not faithful.

On several occasions I have found myself in bed with a caleña who has a gringo husband or boyfriend in the USA or Europe. They might be "just visiting family" while their husband is in the USA or maybe they are waiting for their visa papers. Either way, the presence of some older husband in their life who they are suposedly commited to has never stopped them from getting a royal shagging from me. Of course, with many of these women I found out after the fact that they were married or commited. I couldn't help but thinking of the poor bastards that were believing their lies.

I don't want to get in to too much detail here because possibly some of their "novios" are participants on this board.

[lswote]

... in response to Re: Re: Re: Disagree!, posted by CaliAdvisor on Oct 16, 2003

The only thing you regularly shag is the carpet.

[Calipro]

... in response to Re: Re: Re: Disagree!, posted by CaliAdvisor on Oct 16, 2003

[This message has been edited by Calipro]

You haven't snagged any away from the young colombianos!!!

Going for the easy prey are we. I thought you were doing better than the nasty old wives and girlfriends of americans waiting for their visas. hehehe!!

If you want to move up to a younger better looking group of Caleñas let me know. I'll show you how it's done. I'll be in Cali the 17th of Dec.

As it is americans are pretty much getting the bottom of the barrel down there and I hate to think of you taking their sloppy seconds.

P.S. Go into as much detail as you want. Got any photos??