You guys were right I did not listen

[Big Wally]

... in response to Re: HeyNow, I believe those are generali..., posted by HeyNow on May 7, 2003

She was a nurse and her daughter was about 11 at the time.

One of the other couples just had their first child a few months ago. Two of the couples (including us) don't have any plans for children. One girl is divorced (she was pretty wild and I think still is) and one got pregnant and married a Colombian. I think they are still together.

Typical? I can't say, but I know there are successes out there. It not that different from finding a woman anywhere, you have to get to know them and be aware of the chances you're taking.

I gave my future wife many opportunities to change her story and I figured either this woman is very sincere or really has her story together. As I have found out over the past 3 1/2 years she is exactly as she projected herself to be.

That is as an honest, loving, caring, hard-working woman. She is very devoted to her family, believes in God but is not a regular church goer ("God is in my heart"). She loves my Mom as her own who she lost only 3 months after coming to the US.

She is very concerned about her appearance but not fanatical or a money waster. She is a good voice of conscience for me or I would be off to Las Vegas every couple months.

Oh, sure, we have our differences but they never last. Most are over mis-communication or her frustration over language difficulties. Nothing serious. She spoke fair English when I met her and does pretty well now. She still makes some common mistakes like mixing up he/she and miss pronoucing words which causes me to not know what she's talking about. That leads to frustration on her part. She did take some expensive classes when she got here then continued with some free classes paid for by the county. Everything helps.

I will be the first to admit my situation is probably one in 1,000 but I'm no one special and offer no more than most guys so I know it can happen.

[Jersey Mike]

... in response to Re: You guys were right I did not listen, posted by denvermike on May 5, 2003

the foreign-born women that I have met here in the NY/NJ metro area (whether they are latinas or FSU women) have been even MORE materialistic than most AW I know.  Perhaps this is due to unrealistic expectations of American life and how "easy" we have it here.  (I call it the "Pretty Woman" complex - women who expect to have their new husbands give them the credit cards so they can shop all day, and then be wined, dined and danced every evening - thank Hollywood for this.)  Some women will adapt to a more down-to-earth mindset, but it seems many do not.

No doubt that many foreign-born women are seeking an upwardly mobile lifestyle than what most of us (except the wealthiest) can afford to provide them.  Some of these women will never be satisfied.  Many of these women have never lived in a culture where people go to work on a daily basis, and save and sacrifice today for better things tomorrow.

[Cali vet]

... in response to Sad to say, but..., posted by Jersey Mike on May 5, 2003

I contest one point. Most Colombians do go to work every day. It's just the "save and sacrifice" part they're not hip to. So many of my friends with long term experience in Colombia have said offer a Colombian $1.000 today or $5.000 at the end of the week and he/she will take the $1.000. That's a broad generalization of course. My wife's cousins are an exception. They saved and paid eighty percent cash for the 1999 car they bought.

[Jersey Mike]

... in response to Re: Sad to say, but..., posted by Cali vet on May 5, 2003

I agree that latins have a work ethic.  I was thinking more of FSU natives when I made that generalization.  None of my FSU ex-wife's friends, male or female, seemed to have any ability to find or hold steady employment (with the exception of a few female friends who are exotic dancers in NYC).  The FSU men all seem to be trying to find a quick score, and some are probably engaged in certain types of unsavory activities (which I would rather remain ignorant about!)

I've have observed that many foreign-born ladies seem to be willing to give boyfriends or husbands from their home countries more of a pass when it comes to providing material comforts, and willingly contribute to making ends meet.  Their expectations of AM and the life that we can provide them sometimes seem out of touch with the reality of daily life.  I am envious of those of you who have met women who are willing to share to some extent in the financial responsibilities of married life.

[pirate]

... in response to You guys were right I did not listen, posted by elcolombiano on May 4, 2003

I would not consider this a failure. Be thankful that you found this out before you decided to marry her. Believe me..it could have been a much more expensive experience.

[elcolombiano]

... in response to Re: You guys were right I did not listen, posted by pirate on May 5, 2003

I am very lucky I did not marry her. I would have cost me many time more.

[eddiemd]

... in response to You guys were right I did not listen, posted by elcolombiano on May 4, 2003

Let her go and forget about her. There are plenty of available latin women.
I would avoid Colombia. I will say that Colombia has the best looking women of any latin american country but the majority in the MOB are looking for a meal ticket out of the country. That is a generalization, but the women of Colombia much more than any other latin american country.
And if you are going to look in Colombia, Medellin has the best looking women in the country...and minimal MOB agencies to corrupt them. If you like the more exotic look, head to Cartagena.
With that said...I would look at other countries. There are great looking, down to earth, dynamic latin women from Mexico to Argentina. Don't limit yourself to Colombia. Other hot spots for latinas, known or unknown, include Santa Cruz Bolivia and Guayaquil Ecuador. These two cities have the same percentages for dynamite latinas as Cali Colombia. Lima Peru's sheer number of available latinas far outnumbers Cali's numbers.

[DallasSteve2]

... in response to Re: You guys were right I did not listen, posted by eddiemd on May 4, 2003

Eddie

You wrote: "I will say that Colombia has the best looking women of any latin american country."

Then you wrote: "Santa Cruz Bolivia and Guayaquil Ecuador. These two cities have the same percentages for dynamite latinas as Cali Colombia."

What does "the same percentages for dynamite latinas" mean in that context?  

I still say the more developed (economically) Latin American countries have the better looking women on average.  Bolivia, Ecuador, and Peru are less-developed, economically, along with some others like Honduras and Guatemala.

I've seen a large enough sample of women in Bolivia, Ecuador, and Peru to conclude that their look, in general, is much more "indigenous" than in Colombia.  That is to say, less modern, more rural Indian in appearance.  There's nothing wrong with that if that's what the man wants.

Steve

[eddiemd]

... in response to Dynamite latinas?, posted by DallasSteve2 on May 5, 2003

[This message has been edited by eddiemd]

Dude, I know what I wrote...and I stand by it from experience.

There are european appearing available latinas in all the south american countries.
To each their own.

[DallasSteve2]

... in response to Re: Dynamite latinas?, posted by eddiemd on May 5, 2003

Dude, I was trying to get a clarification, because you may know what you wrote, but I don't.  

Dude, are you saying that the women in Bolivia and Ecuador are as attractive as the women in Colombia?  That would seem to contradict your prior statement that "Colombia has the best looking women of any latin american country", dude.  

Steve

[HeyNow]

... in response to Re: You guys were right I did not listen, posted by eddiemd on May 4, 2003

That's interesting, I was watching CNN early this morning and they had a list of the cities having the most beautiful people: Number 1 - San Diego, Number 2 - Honolulu,  Number 3 San Juan Puerto Rico

[DallasSteve2]

... in response to Re: Re: You guys were right I did not li..., posted by HeyNow on May 5, 2003

Sounds like a list for the US.  If that was their list for the entire world I would have to say: "Huh?".  

If we're just talking US I would rank Miami, Las Vegas, and Houston as high as any cities in the US, but then I haven't travelled that much.  A common thread for all of those cities and CNN's is warm weather.  

I still say, "I wish they all could be Cali, Colombia girls".  I got mine.

Steve

[eddiemd]

... in response to Re: Re: You guys were right I did not li..., posted by HeyNow on May 5, 2003

right, in the USA.

Beautiful is a relative term. CNN...communist news network

[valuedcustomer]

... in response to You guys were right I did not listen, posted by elcolombiano on May 4, 2003

A charming little piece of reality about Latin American culture that escapes alot guys until they learn the hard way.  My novia's father divorced her mother when she was young and then he married another woman having two daughters.  My novia grew up without a father and had to learn to rely on herself.  She is a hard worker, jack of all trades, a spunky survivor, and can cook every type of food.  In contrast, her half sisters were raised having everything done for them by maids.  They are very pretty, cannot cook, are lazy, and expect to marry well off men in town who can support them with maids so they can have children and look pretty.  My novia coming from a long lineage of beauties also has a cousin who was a former Miss Barranquilla who is the same way and married a man in France.  And they are not rich, they are middle class.  In Colombia, servants are inexpensive and you do not have to be rich to have them.  I am not saying there is anything inherently wrong in this lifestyle.  They are just acting with the expectations they were raised with in their culture.  But because of the lack of communications and language barriers, both people are getting what they never expected.  So, the conclusion of all of this is to learn the language, study the culture, and ask lots and lots of questions before you bring someone to the United States.
   

[elcolombiano]

... in response to Re: You guys were right I did not listen, posted by valuedcustomer on May 4, 2003

Its not her fault she does not want to work and is looking for someone to support her, she was raised this way by her parents who were raised the same way by their parents. A zebra can not change its stripes. I thought that because she was well educated she would have some ambition to do something constructive with he life. But I was wrong.