1 AW down -- 0 to go

[MsDuong]

Well, I guess I really won't belong on this board anymore now. So, I know at least one person will get his wish.
you may think this AW has shown her true colors by giving up. Probably a FW, an RW, or a CW, and maybe even LW would have dealt with with it and hung in a liitle longer. I am sure that's the way  some of you will see it.

I do want to say -HEY- to a few guys here. I am sure if we met on the outside of this board we could have been frieds. Dave, Jeff, Jimbo,Stephen Ray, you have all really touched me.

Malcom--I am sorry I did'nt talk to you before I called it quits. Maybe you and your beautiful wife could have enlightened me a bit. I don't know. I wish you all the luck in the world. Kiss your child for me.
If there is anyone I have forgotten--Well, I'm drunk, so get over it.

What will I do now?? Who knows. My visit to vietnam touched me. I know I'll save and travel, save and travel. Maybe even go to the phils. But more than likely I'll start saving for a trip to mexico to see the maya ruins since I can not go to egypt.

I have come to one conclusion tonight. Bud-lite is definatly better that michelob lite.

[Jimbo]

... in response to 1 AW down -- 0 to go, posted by MsDuong on Sep 14, 2002

Hi Lori,

I feel so very sad for you.  These things are always the worst of times.  No advice here - I've been getting the feeling lately that we're missing important elements to the story.

I wish you'd stay.  Maybe the board would help you in your healing process.  And heck, besides that, you have to remember that I gave up AW bashing just for you :-)  You wouldn't want me to regress, would you?

Jim

[Bob S]

... in response to 1 AW down -- 0 to go, posted by MsDuong on Sep 14, 2002

Well, I guess I really won't belong on this board anymore now."

Nonsense.  You've been there, done that.  That gives you as much right to be here as anybody.  You know the process and what to be wary of.  That gives you reason to be here (but I would certainly understand if you want to give it a while to cool down and reflect so you won't be tempted to jump in with, um, blood spraying from fresh wounds?).

"What will I do now?? .. I know I'll save and travel, save and travel."

Good plan.  Travel really does open your eyes.
{begin rant}
 Though I have only lived here in Japan for a few months, one thing I have noticed is that Japan, like America, is very insular.  You can even see it in their popular media here.  Foreign characters still act like Japanese characters.  It seems so many are unaware that people in different lands might have different methods of behavior and communication.
 One thing I have decided from my experiences with Russian and Japanese cultures (i.e. women) is that I absolutely positively will not marry any woman, whether Russian, Japanese, Thai, Midwest Bible Thumper, or Martian, who has not done some travel outside her native country.  Not everyone transplants well.  Not everyone understands that America and Americans (substitute your own country if not from the States) do things differently, and watching American movies dubbed into their native language does not prepare them for dealing with us on a personal level.
 Fortunately as an English teacher, I deal with a different sect of their society.  A large number of my students either travel frequently outside their homeland or are learning English in preparation for eye-opening travel.  Seriously, I have noticed this and so have many other foreign residents: Japanese who have traveled extensively or have done long-term homestays in an English speaking country are often far more mature and far more interesting to talk to than the average locals (the same cannot always be said of people from the Western hemisphere).  The women who have done so are particularly noticeably less obsessed with appearing stupid and kawaii (cute), the local standards of attractiveness.
{end rant}

[Jeff S]

... in response to Don't leave, just travel, posted by Bob S on Sep 14, 2002

What is it about young Japanese women that makes them think ditzy is the best way to present themselves?

- Jeff S.

[Bob S]

... in response to Honto desu ne!, posted by Jeff S on Sep 14, 2002

"young Japanese women... ditzy.."

Though I'm just pulling an answer out of my arse here, I'd say it's partially related to Japan's heirarchical social structure.  The women dumb themselves down (or maybe they were never sharpened up to begin with? Japan's education system is another rant.) so as not to appear intimidating to Japanese men who often can behave like the worst stereotypical frat-boys.  If you are looking for guys to go to an izakaya with, they are fine.  They'll tell you all about their trip to the brothels of Bangkok.  But add a woman to the mix?  They clam up like shy High School wall-flower geeks at a sock-hop.

Lori seems to be describing a similar trait in Thai, a guy who culturally is unable or unwilling to discuss matters with a woman.  Asian men have a lot of fine qualities (patient, hardworking), but IMHO a western woman would have to search long and hard to find one with a compatible personality, one that is willing to be open in a way we are used to.