LP's list of categories?

[Patrick]

From one of your posts-

"One has to wonder how you came to be involved with MOB to begin with. My experience is that the majority of MOB men have reasons that fall into only a few categories..."

LP,

Would you mind taking a few minutes out from counseling the masses to list those categories?

I've been interested in the "why" question for some time, especially the men who go to the FSU.  The order of decisions intertests me.  Do most men decide to pursue a relationship with a MOB, and then decide on what flavor, or do the majority decide to pursue a woman from a particular part of the world and then become involved in the whole MOB thing in order to meet them?  I was one of the latter, but I suspect I may be in the monority.

And if you're feeling REALLY generous, could you share how it is that you yourself came to be (at least peripherally) involved in the MOB scene?

[LP]

... in response to LP's list of categories?, posted by Patrick on Jun 30, 2005

[This message has been edited by LP]

...Is that a crack?

What you ask is a tall order Patrick, and one not easily filled. I could write volumes on this but it would rile a lot of people and open a can of worms. I would have to be very delicate and tactful, something I'm not known for. Even then I think it'd be a lost cause. Generally speaking lets just say the word "dysfunctional" would get employed a lot.

All I'll say is it's well known I feel one of the dirty little secrets of this biz is that the losers (on some level or another) outnumber the normals, not the other way around as many believe. I base this on years of experience in dealing with them and reseaching as much as I could about this racket. Plus if we assume the boards (including this one) are microcosms of MOB it's clear to anyone with the slighest knowledge of human behavior a significant number of MOB guys have problems that go beyong being alone. In fact its often why they're alone. Some of the stuff posted here and on other boards would make a psychologist's head explode.

I can't answer as to why they make a choice of flavor. I suppose it could be some have a preference for a particular "look" or because they feel brand R may be more "exotic" than brand L or A. Or it may simply be a matter of future bragging rights. Ya gotta remember that in my opinion a fair percentage in MOB are often not operating on all cylinders so who knows? Not that its always their fault. You've heard about the "fog of war?" The fog of MOB isn't far behind. However, my comment was more directed at their root motivation for entering the fray to begin with.

As for my reasons, that's less of a problem since, as you stated, I've been on the periphery for quite some time. I could write something up when I get a moment but I seriously doubt anyone other than you would be interested. The basis is that I too can be close to being crackers on rare occasions but have learned to quickly recover when it happens. Doing so usually prevents me from suffering tunnel vision. As for my choosing FSU chix, a local male Russian  friend introduced me to a woman in Ukraine via ICQ. She was the first of many to follow from all sorts of sources. That was 5 years ago. In the end I was meeting them on the street and other places, just as one would at home.

I have never used an agency or bought an address so in that respect I've never been involved in MOB. I consider that end of MOB to be little more than peddling flesh. Many times insincere or scammer flesh too boot. Breaking the language barrier sets oneself free from the cesspool that is agency MOB and opens up a much bigger sea to fish in. Nuff said.

[Globetrotter]

... in response to Counseling the masses?..., posted by LP on Jun 30, 2005

I don't think it's HOW you meet them.  What's important is...what you do after you meet them, and how you feel before you meet them, no matter where they're from.  Don't you think?

Me...I'm lazy, and don't want to answer lots of emails, so I have bought addresses...well one...no, two.  But then, since I like girls close to my own age and they aren't real popular, as many want to date the "daughter", lots of times they're free.  But that's just me.  Sorry...I don't mind "High Time" girls.  What's more important is the quality of who you decide to spend time with.  Personally, I prefer a girl with a kid.  As I'm one of 6, I'm used to the noise, expense, the trauma, but again, that's just me.

So...........don't scare customers away from Jack cause you don't decide to meet them that way, but still, it's a lazy man's way, and it can work.  Just know yourself going in, who you are, what you want, have principles and stand by them, watch for those terrible red flags and react accordingly when they pop up.  Also, pray alot, have great luck, and roll the dice when appropriate....and have a pre-nup!!!!!

Feel honored that Patrick has singled you out...once again, to teach, to coach.  Me....I'm just a prick with an attitude.  

Welcome back.  Glad all went well.

[Frank O]

... in response to Re: Counseling the masses?..., posted by Globetrotter on Jul 1, 2005

I agree with most of what you said. I would NOT deter anyone from tying this however I would strongly warn them this is NOT for the faint hearted. Then again the same crap would/could/will happen simply dating in the USA so there ya go.
As for LP's comments I honestly don't get bothered. The guy makes many relevant points. I'm just not one to worry about many's opinions of me. But I think the problem here is when someone makes a mistake & other's point it out they get bent out of shape. Personally I KNOW I made many mistakes. The first & biggest was getting MARRIED over there. I think if Diana would have come here on the K1 perhaps she would have NEVER COME. In other words I would have bailed back in September. HOWEVER since we WERE married I felt that added need to HAVE to work things out. Obviously she did NOT feel the same as she was constantly talking different scenarion "in case things don't work out & we divorce". I honestly feel in my case she started out sincere & in the year long wait that "love" or commitment just fizzled out. Whereas mine got stronger as the days went by in anticipation I think she started to stray. Oh well.
IN any case I don't think it's right to single out people who are "good critics" or whatever you want to call them. At least in my case most KNEW my saga from the start of this. Yeah, once in a while you have an idiot who doesn't know the history harp in like Lawcom but then there is an arse in forum right?

[LP]

... in response to Re: Re: Counseling the masses?..., posted by Frank O on Jul 1, 2005

...It's not for the faint of wallet either.

You're right not to be "bothered" by my comments Frank, most of them are out of genuine concern but delivered poorly. It's simply my nature. As I said in a previous post, there has been enough emotional carnage in this racket and when I think I see a train wreck coming I'll speak up. I wish you'd have listened to me and the others but hey, a guy hasta do what a guy hasta do.

Good luck. And be careful on the rebound...it's a dangerous phase.

[Frank O]

... in response to Re: Counseling the masses?..., posted by LP on Jul 1, 2005

I know, I'm the same way. I had a friend go through a similar thing. I kept telling him to bail but he was as stubborn as me. His whole world was torn apart when he found pics of her doing PORN. Talk about finding out the HARD way. Poor guy. He was a really nice guy but just fell for the wrong lady. Much like me. Oh well I really have no one to blame but myself. Life goes on. As for the rebound I'm going to lay low. I seriously don't see me marrying within the next 2 years but I'm definately going out dating again. Have an 18 year old for a date tonight. What's up with 18 year old going for 36 year old men?

[OldRed]

... in response to No $h!T dude, posted by Frank O on Jul 1, 2005

Oh come on Frank...you can't be so naive..what does a 36yr old male have to offer that most 18 yr olds don't have? MONEY! Don't kid yourself with the maturity line..

[Frank O]

... in response to Re: No $h!T dude, posted by OldRed on Jul 2, 2005

I said I had a date not that I was marrying or had any intentions of marrying her. By the way she didn't want my $$. She wanted something else. Hey being a musician has it's previliges. ;-))