Are K3's revocable?

[Frank O]

Well guys my wife is NOT taking America well AT ALL. 4 days after arriving she was VERY depressed & crying missing home. To make matters worse she'd be fine then mom or whoever would call & she'd burst into tears.
Anyways please pray for us guys. Just wondering if she goes back (I bought a round trip ticket) is the K3 "voided"? I understand its multi entry but if she goes back I'm filing for divorce my question is could she re enter say if she got the money to live elsewhere etc? Even if WE are divorced in other words?
Well once again please pray for us guys. I know I had many obstacles to overcome to make it THIS far & I know many didn't give us a shot but we're trying man.

[Travis]

... in response to Are K3's revocable?, posted by Frank O on May 20, 2005

Frank, my ex went through the same thing. My situation was a little different, at least I hope it was. My ex-wife married me just to get here but at the time I did what I could to make her feel more comfortable and at ease. She had the language barrier which I think is a huge issue. She couldn't drive and was totally reliant on me and her friends. What I did initially was take a week off work and spend with her. We went just about everywhere in Houston you could go. Plus she was spending a lot of time with her friends...which as it turns out was her reason for getting married. But that's beside the point. Sit your wife down and explain to her it DOES get better. She'll make friends, she'll understand the language, she'll have more to do than she can probably stand. Rome wasn't built in a day, nor is her new life going to come together overnight.

I agree with getting her away from Mamma for a short time. Mamma misses her little girl; she's not considering her daughters best interest. Parents tend to do that! Go on a trip somewhere...ANYWHERE. Y'all need to spend some time together, just the two of you, without Mamma's influence!

Forget the $2k dog until you know the wife is gonna stay. Otherwise you may end up with a $2k dog you can't stand and that is useless. I got a mutt (can't say her name here :-) that has the best nature you ever saw. And she hunts tree-rats (squirrls).

Get divorce outta your mind and her's if you can for now. If it's only been a week she's just being a bit immature and silly. She should have considered all this before she made the decision to place an ad. Give it a little time and keep her occupied.

If in the end you've done all you can do, then heed LP's advice and take care of you!

[Charles]

... in response to Are K3's revocable?, posted by Frank O on May 20, 2005

Frank, as stated in the other posts I am very sorry to hear about your situation.  While I concur with the other posters that 4 days is not enough time to make any "nuclear" decisions, your situation is, while perhaps not the "norm", is certainly not unheard of, if that makes you feel any better.  There are some women who just don't like it in the U.S.  Don't ask me why.  In any event, give it your best shot, as it appears you are attempting to do and as recommended by the others, but if it doesn't work, remember that it's not you, it's her.   I am not sure that anything can really prepare a woman for the experience of leaving her country and coming to a strange land.  Even after 5 years, my wife sometimes wants to return home when there are problems, but we always seem to work things out.  From a legal standpoint, as I understand the procedure, you need to determine whether your have filed an I-130 or I-485.  In either case, it she returns to Ukraine or Russia without proper approval, her application for permanent residency may lapse.   Then all you have to do is seek a divorce under the applicable state law.   If you need to go nuclear with this, I would suggest spending a few hundred dollars on some legal advice.

[tim360z]

... in response to Are K3's revocable?, posted by Frank O on May 20, 2005

Just keep trying your best and stay positive.  If she goes back right away...she is gone.  Take her to a couple pounds and I am sure one little doggie just might touch her in the right place.  Maybe some volunteer work at the pound too. No $2K dog.  You have spent alot over the last 2 years,  in more than just money.

This could all fall apart.  As long as you tried your very best now,  you will never have to kick youself in the butt later.

[T P Cornholio]

... in response to Are K3's revocable?, posted by Frank O on May 20, 2005

I understand your concern about the future.  All that time and energy spent, and now you feel there's no payoff and no happiness (the feeling that, by now, it should all be falling into place for both of you).

My wife did not miss Ukraine, but she did miss her family.  This issue did not really materialize until somewhat later (I don't know how well I could have handled it right off the bat, such as in your case).  But we stayed busy with a lot of different things.  It took my wife a couple years to become familiar with things here, such as simply responding politely to a clerk that says "may I help you" or "thank you" instead of ignoring the person.  After a few years here and becoming accustomed to simple things such as forming lines and being polite, we did return to Ukraine.  This trip only reinforced her lack of any affinity for Ukraine, and the people's behavior -- other than for her family, which she misses more than ever (she has great concern over her grandmother's health, and how she cannot be there to help).  My point is that she would never have understood this if she had returned soon after coming here, and had not yet developed some sense of what we jokingly refer to as "civilization".

Personally, I would not purchase a $2K dog.  But, perhaps talk to her about attending/returning to school with an eye on becoming a veternerian or vet's assistant.  This will allow you to show her you care, and that she can have a future here (no, at the moment you and marriage are not enough).  It will also get her involved in something that provides focus outside the home.  Point out that with the extra money she can make with a future job, she will be able to provide a certain amount to her family each month or whenever they need it (for instance, send $1K at Xmas time).  It can also provide the extra income to pay for visiting (after you get over the IRS hit).

Yes, I know that (theoretically) being married and having each other should be enough, but she needs to push your buttons right now.  If you were to ask her, she would not know or admit to this being any kind of test.  But let me tell you, behind any such emotional situation there is a test of your abilities at being "a good man".  Stay calm, hug her, ask her what she wants and make nudging suggestions about what you would like and what you can do for her.  I suspect her mother is just reinforcing whatever your wife thinks she needs -- going home -- you must do the same but within your lives here, this is her home.  Not to be too base, but if it is that time of the month, then get her through it and give her something else to focus on (but not an expensive dog, I think that will set the wrong tone).

[Davej]

... in response to Are K3's revocable?, posted by Frank O on May 20, 2005

I'll be praying man.  This is rough news.  I've spoken to you before and always had you and your wife on my mind through your proccess.  Mine started 10 months ago, she is coming soon.  I feel for you man, your situation has helped mine more than you can imagine.  What can I say?  Seems LP summed it up quite a bit.  I agree, time will be your friend.

dave

[wsbill]

... in response to Re: Are K3's revocable?, posted by Davej on May 21, 2005

Are just absent of the void of what your doing.  This isn't like purchasing a car or a physical object.  But, what you're doing is like playing god with somebody else life.

Here you invite a lady over to our foreign land and expect everything to just like work out.  Yal make fun of my tomatoes, but in reality they could have made a lady very rich and there wouldn't be any IRS tax bite.  There's big money in growing hydroponic tomatoes.

Besides you can eat what you don't sell.

Last year I ate a helluva lot of tomatoes!! hi hi.

[MNKenr]

... in response to Re:  Sometimes, I think some of you guys..., posted by wsbill on May 21, 2005

Not sure where you are coming from wsbill. Explaine how growing tomatoes and avoiding IRS taxes is appropiate with what Frank posted here?

Maybe I am missing something, and would enjoy a more expressive insight on this matter as it relates to tomotoes, and a homesick wife.

MNKenr

[RickM]

... in response to Whats tomatoes have to do with anything?, posted by MNKenr on May 21, 2005

nt

[wsbill]

... in response to Whats tomatoes have to do with anything?, posted by MNKenr on May 21, 2005

There is no money in hydroponic tomatoes.  Trust me on that.
I should be growing pot instead.  

[wsbill]

... in response to Are K3's revocable?, posted by Frank O on May 20, 2005

Seriously, this will take her mind off Momma.

What have you done since she's been here (not sex wise).  Where do you live again???

[Streetwise]

... in response to How's the SEX ?, posted by wsbill on May 21, 2005

Hi wsbill, the sex is intimate contact between a male and female with the natural purpose of reproduction, but which also provides pleasure for both parties. Sorry I can't be more graphic than that, but I don't want to get banned from the board. If you want I can recommend some useful informative literature on the subject, but if you live in a rural area, just watch those rabbits for a while and you will get the general idea. Hope this helps!

[LP]

... in response to How's the SEX ?, posted by wsbill on May 21, 2005


...been gettin' more than you have, at least if we don't count the tomatoes.

[wsbill]

... in response to I'll bet he's...., posted by LP on May 22, 2005

n/t

[wsbill]

... in response to Are K3's revocable?, posted by Frank O on May 20, 2005

Your fighting a losing battle.  Your either in love or your not.

Don't try and buy it with the show dog bit.  As that'll be money out the window.  Time to wake up.  Allow reality to kick in and tell her good-bye.

Or as I would say.... C ya!!