... in response to WMVM with class?, posted by genoramix on Jun 10, 2003There is a fine art in writing many ladies, visiting many ladies, that becomes more refined and effecient with every trip. And it can be done with class, grace and dignity.
I have written about this a few times in the past, it's in the archives somewhere, but will try to address again today.
Genoramix, how many ladies who have ads posted on the Internet, or listed with some of the larger marriage agencies, do you think are only corresponding with one man? What percentage of ladies do you think will write to, communicate with more than one man? What are the percentages of men who write to and see only one lady?
Just a guess on my part but I would be willing to bet the number of men who write only one woman and the number of women who only write one man is probably a figure that is relatively close to each other. Just as the percentage of men who write more than one woman, and the percentage of women who correspond with more than one man are also probably close to the same figure. I know without any doubt that a LOT of ladies are corresponding with more than one man and a lot of men who are writing more than one lady.
Men, women are all different. Some men, some women only want to write one person. Some men, some women, prefer to correspond with more than one person.
If you are the type person who feels more comfortable with writing to one lady at a time then no one needs to justify to you why you should write more than one woman at a time. Genoramix, each individual must go about this pursuit in the manner in which they are more comfortable with.
For the guys who want to write more than one lady at a time there are certainly many ways to go about this with class, dignity and grace.
Genoramix I do not know you or your character so it is hard to say what I would recommend you to do, as there are as many ways to do things as there are personalities out there. Not knowing anymore about you and your situation I think if I were in your shoes I would do the following. I would continue to write each of these five ladies with hopes of meeting each of them.
How many days are you going to be in Volgograd, this determines a lot. If you are going to be in Volgograd for 12 days or 20 days? What I would do in 12 days compared to 20 days would be different. Let's assume I am going to be in Volgograd for 12 days.
For the past few months now you have done your homework well, you have five wonderful, exciting, beautiful ladies who want to meet you, and you to meet them. As I said, you have done your homework well. To get to these five ladies maybe you started out writing 15 or 20 ladies from Volgograd. Some ladies were not interested in you, a few who replied back you were not interested in. A few of the addresses you bought were bad or the ladies had moved, a few ladies had gotten married or engaged, one or two Elena's turned out to be Igor's. So after your 20, 25 ladies you wrote, you have 5 ladies who you are interested in and they are interested in you. Good job! Anytime a man can have 5 ladies in one city to see he has done a good job. I try to get clients to shoot for from 6 to 8, but there is nothing wrong with having five ladies wanting to meet you.
I get to Volgograd, get into my flat, drop off my luggage, unpack my suits and shirts and get onto hangers, change clothes, don't shower, don't have time to shower, just a change of clothes after 22 hour trip. I do not have any of the five ladies meet me at the airport, this is a no-no. Each will ask and I will tell each,.."I have just traveled some 22 hours, I need to shave, to shower, to change my clothes. I only get one chance to make a first impression and would rather you not meet me at the airport and see me after I have had the chance to shower and change clothes. Each lady will (or should) understand.
It is around mid-day now, maybe 1 or 2pm. I am escorted to one local agency in Volgograd that I feel very good about, has a lot of sincere, beautiful ladies. The owners know most the ladies and can reach them with-in a few hours notice. Over the next 1.5 hours I go thru the catalogs of ladies I am interested in. Catalogs are arranged by ages, 19 to 22, 23 to 26, 27 to 30, 31 to 35, 36 to 40 and 41+. I go to the catalogs of the ladies whose age range interest me and begin looking for ladies I am physically attracted to and like what I read of the ladies. Over the next 1 hour to 1.5 hours I have selected 11 ladies I would have interest to meet. I tell the agency owner good-bye and am escorted to my flat where I take a 1 to 2 hour nap, depending on the time, take a shower and meet lady number 1 of 5 for a 6 or 7pm dinner. There is no time limit with date number 1, we have the whole evening.
On the second day of your trip it's usually best to not plan anything too awfully early as some guys will sleep for a long time, some guys will need the sleep as they adjust to the new time and jet lag and then some guys will have no problem with adjusting at all. I was one of those lucky guys who never experienced jet lag, until after I got married. On my first 8 trips I had never experienced jet lag but was watching for it as I had heard about it. Not until my first trip to Ukraine after I was married did I ever experience jet lag. As I looked back and tried to understand why this was I think it was due to all the excitement I had inside of me with the thought of meeting Svetlana, Veronica, Oksana, Lena, Natalia.
So as I have 11 days left in Volgograd and four ladies to see, I will see lady number two at 2pm, we will have a light lunch, and lady number three at 6 or 7pm for dinner. If I had a strong preference of one lady over the other between lady number 2 and lady number 3, I would see the lady I preferred the most for the 6 or 7pm dinner as this allowed us as much more time together should we want.
On day number three I see lady number four at 12 noon or 1pm for lunch and I see lady number five at 6 for dinner.
Now, after 2.5 days I have just meet all five ladies. Three days earlier as I was flying to Russia in my mind and heart I could marry anyone of these five ladies. Now, after seeing and meeting each of the five ladies, I hope there is one lady with whom I feel real potential chemistry with and I will be damned lucky if there are two ladies I feel potential chemistry with. Again, three days later I was convinced I could marry any of the five and be happy.
Most of us men know in the first 30 to 45 minutes if the lady we are meeting we have strong, special interest in. Most the times we do not. I have many times said I never once had a wasted two hour date. Even though I knew in the first 30 minutes that this woman was more than likely not going to be my future wife, I knew I still had another hour, hour and a half, so I would try to educate myself as to ways of a Russian woman. I would ask about her life, her schooling, what she enjoyed doing. I would always ask how they thought they would adjust to life in America, how she thinks she would adjust to being without family and friends. I would educate myself to the ways of this one Russian woman during our two hour meeting. Once you have done this 25, 50, 75 times, one does seem to educate himself as to the ways of many Russian women and you can see certain patterns that begin to develop.
At every two hour meeting I went to I took a little gift with me, usually I had two gifts with me. At my flat I would have three large zip lock baggies labeled A, B and C. I would always take 1 B gift and 1 C gift with me to each meeting. If I really liked the woman, not as a potential future wife, just as being a good woman, I would give her a B gift. Other ladies I would give a C gift too. In many cases I had corresponded with these ladies for 2, 3, 4 months. After meeting I new she was not the Russian bride I was looking for but had got to know her from the months of corresponding. As I was beginning to end the meeting I would tell her that I think she is a wonderful woman and I think she will make some man a very good wife. I would encourage her to keep looking for a good man and that I was sure she would find someone to make her very happy. I would then stand-up, hand her a gift and wish her well.
Now sometimes I would be all goggled eye over a woman, WOW, he1l yea I hope I can see her again! If I felt really excited about a lady I had just met and wanted to see her again, I would tell her that I would like to ask her out again but would call her that evening or the next day and see how she felt. I would not ask the lady or have her make that decision right then. What I discovered was that a lot of fine ladies would say yes to your face, that they would like to see you, even if they did not care to see you. Most of these Russian ladies did not have it in them to say "No. They did not care for a second meeting" to your face, but on the telephone, not in person, they were more at ease to say no.
Of the five ladies we just met Genoramix, two did not have interest in us, one we had no interest in, one there was just no chemistry and hopefully there is one that there is real potential chemistry with. If there is one such lady, we now have the next 9 day's to spend with each other. If we were very lucky and there were two potential ladies, we can spend 2 or 3 days with this one lady and 2 or 3 days with the other and if one lady surfaces to the top, we spend our last remaining 2 or 3 days with her or we travel to Moscow together or go spend these days with her family.
Now if by some chance the chemistry needed for man and wife with any of these five ladies was not there,....what to do now? Well I would always try to have a back-up list of 4 or 5 ladies to see in addition in every city. Most of these back-ups would come about during the last three or four weeks before my trip. In addition to this list of back-up ladies, there are the ladies from the agency I went to upon my arrival into Volgograd three days earlier. There was not the chemistry needed for man and wife with any of the first five I came to see. There is no sense in wasting my time with any lady I do not feel can be my future wife, so I move on, no sense in spending anymore time with Tatiana, the feelings aren't there, even though we communicated with each other for three months. No real feelings for Svetlana, even though we communicated for 2.5 months, I need to move on, meet other ladies. So I find out that three of the eleven ladies I picked from the marriage agency have interest to meet me. Over the next few days I meet with these ladies as well go to my back-up list of ladies.
Now we all hope that with one or two of those first five ladies we might have had some real chemistry, this is what we were hoping for. With what I have seen and witnessed over the past nine years, for every seven ladies that a guy see's that he had communicated with for some time, usually one out of seven ladies will have the potential chemistry needed. This is one reason why I suggest guys try to be able to see from 6 to 8 ladies in any one given city. You had 12 days on this trip, kind of hard to get in two full cities but give me 14, 15, 16 days and we can repeat this process in two cities. Give me 17, 18 days and we can manage three cities in which you could have met some 15 to 20 ladies. And yes, it took a great amount of serious work and effort to manage to see 20 sincere, exciting, beautiful ladies.
It was somewhat easy to find 20, 30, 40 beautiful ladies who interested us and excited us. A little harder in finding some of those same 8 to 12 beautiful ladies who have a sincere interest in us and much harder in finding that one woman who was as beautiful on the inside as she was on the outside. One reason I am a firm believer (after trying the wrote one, visit one approach) that it is a numbers game here. Were looking for our lifetime mate. Some of us are lucky in that we find her and she was the first and only Russian woman we ever met (and I always wonder how those guys know the one and only Russian woman they ever met was truly the best for him if he never had a second, or third Russian woman to compare her too!). Some guys will marry the one Russian women they went to visit because she had sex with him during the first hour of there meeting. Why, how, a man can marry a woman like this I will never know. Other guys can find there dreambride after meeting 3, 4, 5 Russian ladies. Other guys after meeting 20 ladies, other's after 50, 100 ladies and a few after 200 ladies.
Now Genormix let's back up a few months with your scenario as we continue with how to write many ladies, visit many ladies and do such with class and dignity.
While we were writing several ladies over the past 3 and 4 months, 65% of the ladies at one time said,..."Genoramix, maybe you write to other women besides me?" or they say,...."Genoramix, maybe you see other woman when you come to see me?". You never volunteer this information, but when asked, and you guys are asked 65% of the times, your reply should be, "Tatiana, I am corresponding with another woman"...Elena, I am corresponding with "another" woman.
Not one, not two, not three, not four, not five other women, but I am corresponding with "another" woman. If you tell any of these sincere Russian women that you are corresponding with 3, 4, 5 other ladies, she will probably be history. Scammers don't care how many women you are writing too. They figure once they can wrap those long legs around you, your not going anywhere.
I am not saying you lie to the ladies, I am saying you do not tell them you are corresponding with, going to meet 5, 7, 8 other ladies, if you do she is history. You say you
are corresponding with "another" woman.
Usually after you tell this lady you are corresponding with another woman, there will be some 3 or 4 seconds of silence. Then you will hear a ..."Uh-huh. Tell me Genoramix, where does this woman live, what is her age?" To which you reply,..."Natalia, I will not talk about this other lady! I think about you, I come to see you, I will not talk about this other lady!". And you say this with the emotions that Russians speak with and that is usually the last time the topic is discussed again.
What you have just done here is admitted that you are corresponding with another woman. Most American men lie about it,...."oh, I'm there for business, or just on vacation, or only write you". These ladies know why you are coming there and when you tell her that you are corresponding with another woman, in one sense the woman feels relieved that you have told her that you are communicating with another lady. This helps to make the trip in seeing more than one lady a bit easier now.
With about two weeks before the actual trip the man (in many cases our people do this but sometimes the guys do it themselves) will tell each lady,..."You know Oksana, I think our first visit, our first meeting, should be one of a few hours". " Genoramix, why only a few hours", Oksana asks? "Well Oksana, before we plain what we are going to do all week, where we will go, let's first make sure we have an interest, a liking for each other".
Now when I first started this approach with my second trip of 1997 I thought that a third, maybe a half of the ladies would not see me. In my own experience as well as every client who has done this, not one sincere woman ever turned down the couple hour first meeting.
I was surprised, every women from that trip agreed to our first meeting of a couple of hours, ladies I had been writing to for 3, 4 months. With my first and second trips of 1998, again, every lady agreed to the first meeting being a couple of hours long. Why was this? The reason these ladies also agreed to our first meeting only being a few hours was because they, like me, like us, also wondered what they would do if there was no chemistry with this person. {and it happens all the time} What am I going to do all week if I do not like this guy? The sincere ladies were just as grateful to the thought and idea of a two hour meeting. The ladies I noticed who were not big on the first meeting couple of hours were the scammers, as this is not want they wanted to hear, or expected to hear.
Now Genoramix, before you or anyone else wants to say this method is bad, or cruel, or you don't like it, well you are certainly entitled to your opinion. For those who say this method does not work, I can say you are dead wrong. This method is working every day, every week with success. Many men are now meeting a lot of fine ladies in a short period of time. You go into a city for 7, 8, 9 days, meet all 4, 6, 7 ladies in the first two, three days and then spend the next 5 or 6 days with the one or two ladies whom you felt real potential chemistry with. If you have more days, you repeat the process in a second city. How long does one want to look for his future Russian bride, or maybe he will accept a woman who is close to what he is seeking.
You guys have time to spend two hours with a lady whom there is no chemistry with, most of us do not have the time to spend two days with a lady whom we have no chemistry with. In your made up case Genormax you have met all five ladies in 2.5 days and you have 9 days left to spend with the one, or two ladies of interest, or meet other ladies. If you were to give two days to each of these ladies you would have two days left to spend with anyone you felt good about, or two days left to see the three ladies who had interest in you from the local marriage agency.
For you guys who can write many, visit many (WMVM) you need to spend your time wisely, to meet many ladies in a short period of time and then spend quality time with any lady who greatly interested you or too move onto other options and back-ups.
For the guys who prefer to write one, visit one then none of this really matters or applies.
There is no right way or wrong way when it comes to meeting one lady per trip, or meeting two ladies per trip, or meeting 6 ladies or 10 ladies per trip. The way that you are most comfortable with is the right way.
