Advice to Myself

[MONK]

[This message has been edited by MONK]

About three years ago, I met a woman while on a trip to SPb, and, after two more visits and many, many communications, decided that she was the one.

Then, letters and calls became less frequent, and I recently received the "Dear Monk" letter I had been in dread of.

So, here's some advice from Monk to Monk:  Go away and sulk for a week or so, then start over clean with some new names and addresses.

On Edit:  It just looks better laid out on a web page.

[Mike]

... in response to Advice to Myself, posted by MONK on May 5, 2003

Monk that's life. Even if you had gotten her here and after some time the two of you split remember your own advice because each day can be a new start.
Mike

[CS767]

... in response to Advice to Myself, posted by MONK on May 5, 2003

Monk,
  Good thinking!I am now in the damage repair mode also.I am going back--no doubt.I had a back up plan that worked for me well.I saw a large part of the sites of Southern Crimea.I still wasn't emotionally available to see more ladies so I came home.Each of us has a little different plan so "to thine own self be true"( Shakesphere )cs

[MONK]

... in response to Advice to Myself, posted by MONK on May 5, 2003

When we met, neither of us was actively looking.  I was in SPb on vacation; we met in the lobby at a show.

After we met, we both got interested in exploring our options.  That took some time.

She wanted to finish her doctorate and her book without the distraction of another visit.

At the same time, I had some bad breaks in business and in health.  That lost us almost a year, as, first, I could not travel or make an honest promise, then I had to start rebuilding.  Still, one of us "talked" to the other almost every day for most of that time.  

We met for the third time.  Both of us said it was time to get serious, and started planning a long visit together.  Then she dropped out of sight for a few months, and the pace never picked up after that.

So there's my excuse.

[vagn]

... in response to Mitigating Circumstances, posted by MONK on May 5, 2003

signs of a tepid romance:

=== She wanted to finish her doctorate and her book without
=== the distraction of another visit.

=== Then she dropped out of sight for a few months

Count yourself lucky.

[thesearch]

... in response to You should be happy, not all gloomy, posted by vagn on May 5, 2003

sdf

[vagn]

... in response to Advice to Myself, posted by MONK on May 5, 2003

Hard to imagine where you could have gone wrong.

[Frank O]

... in response to 3 years, and you didn't pop the question..., posted by vagn on May 5, 2003

NT