Some eyeopeners about ur RW and her email

[Cold Warrior]

[This message has been edited by Cold Warrior]


O.K., well here's a scenario for you to think about!

A smaller agency in the Ukraine has "Sold" the woman's contact details including "Her" contact E-mail address to a bigger International Agency? The result is two-fold:

1.   That the smaller agency receives payment for the selling of her address to the larger International agency.

2.   That the smaller agency, then charges that Woman to receive "Her" unsolicited mail from all of the men who have bought her contact details and sent mail to her.

Now here's the good part, she goes to her agency to collect her bundle of E- mails, which she pays for and reads with interest. This has been quite an expense for her. So when she has found a man who's mail really interests her, she'd go home and try to write a response. A few days later she goes to the agency to "Send Her response". Surprise! She has 10 more E-mails waiting for her to be collected, a woman can not afford to pay for all those letters so she has to chose 2 or 3 and ignore the rest. So if you are using a Ukrainian agency to correspond with women and it's free for, just know that women are the one who would have to pay for every letter and every response, translation and pictures.

Could this possibly be one of the reasons, why very few or even none of your previous correspondence has even been acknowledged?
It's a vicious circle "Fuelled on both sides by desperation". The men then in desperation buy more address and send more letters. The women on the other hand, will in desperation sell their valuables in order to continue correspondence with "Their man", who after a couple of months gets "Fed-up" and stops corresponding. He, never having realized the hardship that he has brought upon the woman.            

Copied from -
http://www.ukraine-affair.com/en/intro/

Some Advice -

1. use an email forwarding service i.e you send your letter by email, the agency prints it and sent by post to the lady. The lady then replies to you and agency forwards reply to you by email.

2. try to call at least once using an interpreter if possible and work out a mean of correspondence with the lady that does not cause her any financial hardship.

[RickM]

... in response to Some eyeopeners about ur RW and her emai..., posted by Cold Warrior on Mar 11, 2003

she was getting about 30 or 40 new letters a week but fortunately for me there was only ONE letter she received that seriously mentioned specific details about ACTUALLY traveling and coming to see her in person for real...

THAT seemed to sprew her interest initially because it seemed there were HUNDREDS of men interested in her and writing to her but she wondered with-out asking...Just how many of these writers even think beyond writing and think about actually meeting in person...BINGO...

Statistics if I am correct speak to the fact that actually less then 2% of men who actually get the idea to write a RW will actually travel to meet one in person...Think the girls know it "AND WHAT KEYWORDS TO LOOK FOR "

[NW Jim]

... in response to How Right You Are...My Wife Tells Me..., posted by RickM on Mar 12, 2003

Rick as I recall your wife is from Kyrgyzstan, correct? There seem to be quite a few ladies from that small country listed on the various agencies.

What is the situation on the ground?  Are the ethnic Russians trying to leave as they become a smaller and smaller minority? Are they discriminated against?

How is the economy doing?, how much of a factor is that in the ladies looking for a foreign husband? What is their motivation level?

Thanks in advance.

[RickM]

... in response to Rick, a couple of questions, posted by NW Jim on Mar 12, 2003

Hey Jim...
Good Questions...To begin with,yes,my wife was born and raised in Kyrgyzstan until she came here to USA in May 2001.I've been there 3 times now.I'll get back to your questions about RW there a little further on in this post but first let me try and express to you a few other pieces of the puzzle in order to answer your questions a little more clearly.
I "do" think that many ladies profiles get sold and "stolen" by larger agencies just looking for photos to post and probably later on making facticious letters for money.It's seems to be a strange business at best which is why I advocate traveling as oppossed to writing.Of course it would be nice to follow another's footsteps and not be walking onto virgin soil halfway across the world when looking to meet a lady.There are some real agencies where the owners believe in their work of trying to unite couples from anywhere in the world.I wouldn't be surprized to find my wife'd profile somewhere if I was actually to start looking through some of the larger agencies.If it is in fact Bishkek,Kyrgyzstan you are thinking of going to in hopes of meeting a nice lady,I'd be happy to help you in any way I can.Just ask...
There is a lot that goes into trying to understand the motives and thinking of a RW or "any"  foreign persons thinking for that matter...Short of studying their historys and visiting and living there for some amount of time,it is not very easy to understand how a person thinks and I think the same holds "very true" for RW and foreign people that come to try and live in "our" country USA...As far as RW living in Kyrgyzstan goes,I'll share with you what is "my" opinion of how they think.Keep in mind some RW vary in thier ethnic backrounds and historys so I don't think it is fair to expect "every" RW living there to be thinging totally along the same wavelengths...

Kyrgyzstan is "central Asia" boardering China,Tajikstan,Kazastan and Uzbekstan.To get there is a 4 hour flight out of Moscow.There are other more expensive but hardly faster ways to get there from USA like Royal Dutch Airlines and KLM.Currently,it is an approx.80% Asian population(not caucasian-your in central asia)there now,and it previously was controlled by Russia for many,many years.Long and interesting history and very beautiful place to see and visit.Kyrgyz people definetly resent Russians now and are even trying to make their Kyrgyz their national language again there.Kyrgyz history is very interesting in itself but their people traditionally over centuries are a very "mellow" normadic "very light-Sumy Muslim" race.At the same time,they,russians and Kyrgyz people,still all live in the same boat and have a very long "history" of living together in the same country.Kyrgyzstan is the first and most democratic of all the CIS rebublics that broke away and became independent from russia,including Ukraine and the others.It'll take generations if at all to see all the changes happen that this country would like to have occurr there...Signs there are still in russian everywhere and all people there still for the most part speak russian...

Russians there are definetly becoming a smaller minority by the day there and they are very discriminated against in every walk of life there now.(That is according to my wife's Russian friends still living there...)I think that by now since peristroika ,1991 for the most part,it is true to think that already any Russians living in Kyrgyzstan that could have afforded to leave there and go somewhere back into Russia territorys where perhaps family members were available to go to and could have helped them start over again have already done it.The remainder seem to be "stuck" there.As to the economy now there in Kyrgyzstan,the people are learning painfully that independence has it's price...The people there were receiving free housing,medical and schooling etc. during Soviet times but now that is long gone and Kyrgyzstan is learning painfully how "out of the way" they are geographically located and "how little they are known about by the rest of the world".It's a small country.The place really has some potential for tourism because of it's natural beauty and it is very,very rich in metal ores,petroleum and mining.They are setting mining records for themselves each year but they are such a landlocked country with no ports and such steep mountainous terrains they are in reality "isolated" from the rest of the world...Kyrgyzstan is always looking and inviting foreign companies to come to their country and get their feet wet but with the Muslim thing around it's boarders and old "russian mafia" ways it is truelly difficult for a foreign company to go there and get around the cost of paying for "protection" to exist there.Cheap labor is definetly available there and leasing or buying property is quite reasonable by standards of other parts of the world.I find Russia very much that way also as it pertains to starting up businesses there.You must be a native and have "brass balls and lot's of contacts or else sooner or later the "GOOBIES" will be knocking or breaking on your doors for their take of the bribes and protection money from you.It's just the way of life out there...

I'll say one thing,the USA dollar is "still" a very strong 50 Som(kyrgyz. currency)to 1 USA dollar.For example,20cents will get you a pack of cigs,1 dollar hails a cab 8 miles across the city and nice flats furnished with phone,cable tv and furniture can be had for about 200 USD a month and that is "high" rent in downtown footsteps away from any human need...If you speak russian or a little of their lingo and spend enough of time there you won't be a tourist anymore and you'll become educated as to what really is going on around you.It's even cheaper than that to live there...There are hotels there that'll gladly take your 100 dollars a night but that is simply "ridicous" out there.Better to go there and have someone like me who has been there and still has contacts there arrange your trip for you or let a marraige agency(there are only 2 I know of) take care of you as opposed to going on the "blind".I can't find ways to spend 500 USD in a month while I am there and I do things and eat out daily...

To get back to my wife and her family's experiences,my wife moved into the city center capitol of "Bishkek",pop.over a million to attend university when she was about 14 yrs.old.She became a "city-person" and hates farm life now...She visited her family in Russia about 2 years after they moved back to russia but she was "cured" in about 2 weeks with no tv or phone and walking around in a "mudhole' milking cows and farming where my in-laws live.She quickly moved back to Bishkek,Kyrgyzstan and was very happy again to be living amongst her friends back inside a large city with paved roads,city luxarys and her fingernails painted again.(That is part of my wife's identity)She had not seen her family in almost 6 years when I met her in Kyrgyzstan.My wife still has a Kyrgyz (not russian) passport.Her remaining family members now have new russian passports(the old soviet passports have expired in new russia and are no longer valid).My wife's family are Russians but mum and grand-mum origional roots were a mixed Polish and Ukranien.They now live in an Armenian community inside Russia.As my father-in-law puts it (He's Armenian but of Russian decent)Russian passport and generation after generation of living on Russian soil "they"(Armenians)are the "niggers" of Russia.They are "farmers"...Working niggers...Barely surviving off the land...22 USD monthly russian pensions.
***NO PUN INTENDER***...I AM "NOT" A RACIST...I respect black race...I am using "their" russian slang...

Before moving back to Russia,my in-laws all lived and worked very hard farming in southern Kyrgz.in a city named OSH.They were not "rich" by any imagination but their quality of life there at that time was "far superior" to what they are experiencing now in their "later" years and back inside Russia.BOTH the Russian and the CIS economys never recuperated any since peristroika...Everyone works just as hard but for lot's less... After "peristroika" the south of Kyrgyzstan became a very war-torn and violent area to live in and it became impossible to ensure safety to your family living there.Many people who did not sell out and leave Osh in time completely lost out on valuation of their properties there.Many of the first ones to leave like my in-laws bailed out a little but still went back to Russia with their Russian passports seeking their old age pensions,but they packed up and moved like the Beverly Hillbillies,cut their losses and their losses were tramatic.(My opinion of Osh and other boarders there like Tajic,Uzbek and Kazak) is that they now are a major drug-traffiking areas with little or no real law being inforced since russia pulled out.The Muslin thing is a bit of a problem in that area also.Al Quida "is" trying to spread it's wings some.Afganistan is only 14 hours drive south  away from the southern boarders od Kyrgyzstan.Not a safe place to be but if you go 12 hours drive north to Bishkek you feel "NO" effects of it at all.It is like being in another completely different world...Of coarse that is due to the fact that when I am there I only live by day and stay home at night.I'm sure there is a lot going on at night that I am unaware of but that is the way of life for people out there...Home at night...

Jim...With all that being said...You ask what the motivation factor and levels are of a RW there looking for a foreign husband...What a loaded question...
First of all,AND THESE ARE ONLY MY OPINIONS...I think the mix of upbringing of Russian Christianity combined along with the very family oriented values of an Asian Kyrgyz type  culture is a "perfect" prerequisite for finding a RW family oriented Christian white lady if that is truelly in fact what you are looking for...Keep in mind some facts...Kyrgyz people "do not" intermarry...The economy is very difficult to raise a family on there in Kyrgyzstan...There are not a lot on foreigneers passing through this remote area...Most people there have never been anywhere else in their lives...Life is tough and getting worse there not better...By 25 yrs.old most "good" Russian men there are either already married or moved...Most RW there have "heard" about a marraige agency or of someone that has "left" to marry a foreineer but I didn't see drones of woman lined up at the so-called marraige agencies there...Fact of the matter is that most woman there are feeling very "old' by 30 yrs. old and feeling like their chances of happy family life has passed them and are too busy trying to survive...Many men turn "sour" on the ladies when they get hooked on drug and alcohol addictions usually because they are so frustrated by the inability to land good steady work out there in terible economic conditions coupled along with the fact that available woman RW are outnumbering men in that part of dodge by about 6 to 1...(every guy likes to have a 'youngthing" on their arm to go partying with and they are available in drones...etc.etc.etc...The cards seem  stacked "against" happy family life out there...

Now for the few reality questions and (fill in yourself) answers...I think many woman RW out there could be easily  convienced to leave there and take a "try" at a differnt type of life...What are you "both" looking for in life?...Language and customs could certainly be a barrier...Communication is probably one of the most important parts of any relationship...Learning new cultures and ways of life and "creating history together" takes time...Peole "do" get homesick for friends,family and loved ones...Are you willing to do some traveling to meet someone?...etc.etc.etc....

I feel like a very lucky person.I went there on a whim and met my wife amongst many beautiful woman.My wife is 12 years younger that me and beautiful in my eyes but we'll all get older in time and lose our gracious appearences.Then where will true love lie?We already have been blessed in our history with a beautiful and healthy 1 year old son that we both wanted.We both were looking for a good relationship that would withstand all life's problems and last throughout our complete lives.I come from a place with a better economy but she is a woman who would give me anything she has including her last dime or time.It has been more difficult for her coming to a strange land than it has been for me to visit and bring her here.She is very femine and I am very masculine.Maybe it is tue that oppisites attract.We have arguments or rather "disagreements" like any couple and but with her it is finished as soon as the argument is over.No lingering "baggage".I like that and the fact that her previous life seems to have made her more of a realist than any of the many woman I've been with in my life.I'd like her to have more independence because she threw herself into our marraige so strongly I'm afriad of what she'd do if I dropped dead tomorrow.All in all I suppose life is what you make of it.I took a chance with my life and tryed something very different.Along the way i feel i was only following what destiny had planned for me.I love it when people ask us how we met and we tell them on a computer from across the completed world.I'm convinced....If the spirit moves you...don't get in the way....follow it and let destiny and Mother Nature do Her job...

[NW Jim]

... in response to Some Answers To Your Questions-A little ..., posted by RickM on Mar 13, 2003

Rick,

Wow, thank you for the very detailed response. It’s a shame that we couldn’t have started a separate thread on Kyrgyzstan and other smaller CIS countries. At least in the future people using the search function will be able to find your informative information.  I’m always interested to learn about out of the way places and opportunities.  

I realized after I posted that my questions about motivation were rather general, and perhaps some would say cynical. Yet I’ve noticed in the MOB business that some countries have a lot more interested ladies than others. There is also of course the concern about ladies who may be “over motivated”, and less than sincere.

As I mentioned, I’ve seen quite a few attractive, educated ladies from Bishkek who have joined agencies. Since you’ve mentioned Svetlana’s agency on P-L, I’ve been visiting it regularly. I agree with you that writing ahead of time is generally a waste of time; although as other posters have pointed out—it tends to weed out the less determined and the scammers.

From my other reading I had also gathered that the southern parts of central Asia, including places like Osh were rather unsafe and probably not places a man would go looking for a wife.

It sounds like you’ve found happiness and created a loving family, one really can’t ask for more than that. Congratulations!

[RickM]

... in response to Re: Some Answers To Your Questions-A lit..., posted by NW Jim on Mar 13, 2003

Thanks Jim,and if there is anything I can ever do to help please don't hesitate to aks...Best of luck on your search and I agree with you completely...There are some wonderful people here posting a wealth of helpful information at planet-love...

[DanM]

... in response to Some eyeopeners about ur RW and her emai..., posted by Cold Warrior on Mar 11, 2003

Also you have the burnout factor that often applies to these girls. When a girl opens an account, do you honestly think all of her letters will be from well-adjusted, honest or even lucid men. Think again.

I will tell you the story my wife told me to better explain my point. My wife lived in Moscow and was studying English at a university. She went through a local agency to place an ad. She did this on a lark, because she thought it would be fun to read some of the letters and because she wanted to practice her English. All she did was go to the agency office with cash, photos and a filled out form. About a week latter she goes to pick up the letters. She expected 5 or 6 letters. Do you know how many she had? She had somewhere between 60 and 70 letters. Now you would think that there would be a lot of good, decent guys in her batch of letter. Fortunately for me, that was not the case. She had lots of form letters. She also had lots of letters containing naked photos or asking for her naked photos. After she read all the letters, she had 6 people who seemed worth a reply. By this I mean they were serious, sincere, less than 20 years older than her and fully clothed in their photos.

Of these 6 letters, I think 4 wrote her a second time. Of those 4, only two seemed interesting after 3 letters. After about 2 weeks, it was just one. Obviously it was me. : )

Anyway, my point is how the junk mail these women receive discourages them from the process. Ira never went back to pick up more letters because it was not worth her time. Unless a girl likes to look at photos of 60+ naked men wearing black leather or form letters, the pickings can be pretty slim.

Just wanted to share this so you would have a better idea of what these girls are going through. Also, I want you to understand why many of these girls do not reply if the ad was posted a while back.

[Cold Warrior]

... in response to Re: Some eyeopeners about ur RW and her ..., posted by DanM on Mar 12, 2003

Thanks man. Until now i have refrained from writing to ladies who have received a lot of mail. Certain websites list the amount of requests for addresses of the ladies. I was intimidated by any lady receiving more than 20 and thought my chances were lessened. I think I'll write to any lady i'm interested in, I hope they can sift the Wheat from the Chaff.

[DanM]

... in response to Wow........, posted by Cold Warrior on Mar 12, 2003

Just remember that a lot of these girls totally lose interest in the procecss very quickly. For example, if I had not written within 3 days of my wife joining her site, she never would have even read my letter. She checked for mail 4 days after joining to pick up the first batch and never checked back.

Although I did not know the specifics, I intuitively knew to target the girls who had recently joined an agency. That is also the lesson I hope you guys pick up from my telling this story. Find sites that post the date the girl joined and get your initial letters out as soon as they join. This will give you such a better response ratio.

I do not care how cute a girl looks, if her ad has been up for months, your chances are much, much lower. Odds are that the site is just keeping her on for extra traffic even though she is no longer responding. Something to keep in mind while you are looking.

[Cold Warrior]

... in response to Re: Wow........, posted by DanM on Mar 12, 2003

i remember writing to a girl who had only been on a website for a few weeks saying that she had already found her special man.I asked how is this possble?, you have to see what's on offer first then decide.She said she thought it was dishonest to write to many men at the same time, besides she heard that you get put on a blacklist for doing so.

[thesearch]

... in response to Some eyeopeners about ur RW and her emai..., posted by Cold Warrior on Mar 11, 2003

I had heard about us guys signing up for an ad with the agreement being that one pays for the correspondence that results and then----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------    BAM     a flood of e-mail from who knows who relative to real intentions and of course a huge bill is the result.

To me, if a company was working on a way to extract as much  money as they could from a guy --- what sweet way to do it. Personally I would never agree to such.

But, here is the question  ----  this is the first time that I have heard of the same scenario being placed upon the laps of these ladies. Where did you come by this information? Just wondering about the source that is all.

Thanks in advance,

Greg

[Cold Warrior]

... in response to Question, posted by thesearch on Mar 11, 2003

[This message has been edited by Cold Warrior]

i got the above story from

http://www.ukraine-affair.com/en/intro/

I have also heard similar stories from my ex girlfriend in Kiev. Apparently some unscrupulous local agencies are charging both the men and women to receive and send emails. Also a girl i wrote to 2 years ago said the agency threatened to put her on a blacklist if she did not reply to every email she got. Of course the agency made a tidy sum charging the men for forwarding the replies.

This is especially true for the ladies whose letters are translated and 'censored' by the agencies. This is why I think it it better to use a US based agency that you can trust or  phone the lady and find out first hand about her correspondence with you.

[micha1]

... in response to Re: Question, posted by Cold Warrior on Mar 11, 2003

On your side about this question.
It is a cinch that some agency will play both side of the fences.
When it comes to money, they are there to grab all they can.
And will exploit, anyone, for as much as possible.

[Charles]

... in response to Some eyeopeners about ur RW and her emai..., posted by Cold Warrior on Mar 11, 2003

I think everyone using e-mail to communicate with their RW should keep in mind the following facts:

1)   Very few RW have their own e-mail accounts or access to a computer at work.  Thus, most of them will be using an agency or an internet cafe.  Both of these cost the RW money to retrieve or send an e-mail.

2)   Even those RW who profess to be fluent in English, including, I might add "English teachers", are going to need time to translate your letters.  Those who don't speak much English will probably need even longer time, plus possible translation costs.  If my experience is any guide (and my wife spoke fairly good English), if you send a long e-mail you can reasonably expect her to respond within a week.  If she can't speak English, look for a 2 week period for a response as a reasonable range.  It could, of course, be shorter or longer depending on the individual case.

   You have to be patient regarding responses.  Just because they don't respond immediately or as quickly as you does not mean they are not interested.  Think about how long it would take you to receive a long e-mail in Russian, have it translated into English, write your response in English, and then have it translated back into Russian.  That's the process (in reverse) that your RW is doing with your letters.