preferences/agendas/standards

A lot has been written here about the preferences of both AM and RW. The simple idea is that AM want a younger, prettier and more feminine woman than they find in America. The RW want a better life with an AM that can provide for them in ways most RM cannot. I see no problem with either of these concepts as long as this is not the only criteria for selection. There should be an emotional attachment that goes beyond just a logical checklist.
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In discussing this with my wife, she cut through this with a very simple explanation. She said that she had "standards" for her potential spouse. She was attracted to men that had an aggressive drive for success. Whether they were Russian or American was almost immaterial. ( I would have to say that a RM would have been her preference as she loved her life in Russia.) She went on to say that she was not attracted to "ordinary" workers who were satisfied with a day to day existence. She was attracted to decisive men with the drive to succeed. Of course she had the luck (good or bad) to fall in love with an American that fit her "profile" for a spouse.
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I can remember making the conscious decision to explore RW. I had had much success in dating AW. "Success" being defined as not having any difficulty in finding female companions without finding "the one" I would be willing to spend the rest of my life with. I was under the impression that a person can fall in love with a number of people. Why not look for love in a pool of women that are younger, prettier and more feminine than what I had been used to? I also had it in my head that I would never marry again, unless it was perfect for me. I was not going to compromise. Then I met Lena.
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So, yes, we both had agendas. Most people do, whether they choose to admit it or not. Or is it just that we both had high standards?
KenC