Mark,
First of all, congratulations :c) I am truely happy that you feel you have found "The One". She must be a very special young lady and she's lucky to have found a good guy like you ;c)
Dude... I'm not gonna beat up on you in any way. It's not my style and I have no right. It is my hope that you have found the relationship that will last the rest of your life and I wish you nothing but happiness, prosperity and wedded bliss! :c) You don't have to respond, I already have a good idea of the answers you'll give, but I would just like to ask you to really, really think things through. Trust me, I thought I had all the answers once myself. I did not, but hey... maybe that's just me :c)
I too am 35 and am about two weeks away from an annulment with a Filipina 13 yrs my junior. Now, I realize that everyone is different, trust me I do, but somethings are unversal. Hey, I'm hip. I'm a young 35. I listen to music that's up to date, like the Gen X fashions--although Tee-Shirts and Sweats are ALWAYS in fashion :c) LOL--can not only stomach, but find myself liking the popular twenty-something movies, TV shows, etc... I'm not an "Old Dude" grasping my youth, I am just who I am. I march to my own drum machine :c) HATE drummers LOL, inside joke :c) (No Offense Mars! LOL) Sure, I'm responsible and quite mature, but I relate better to Pop Culture than most people I know our age. I am a musician and I think young, etc... Basicly, I'm not an old boring guy, my sense of humor keeps me young :c)
With all of that said, a seventeen year old, no matter how mature she seems, is still a seventeen year old. My wife was barely 21 when we got married, by the time the good behavior wore off, I was sure she was younger than that! LOL For the most part we were destine to fail for other reasons, but do NOT disregard the age gap you will face. There is no way to prepare for it, it happens when you least expect it and it can be EVIL!
There were so many things I let slide, because I was so into having a young attractive wife, just be smarter than me that's all I ask :c)
Was it worth it? For me, sure. I'm not thrilled about the Annulment or the end of my marriage, but I have met someone through this that truely understands and accepts me without condition. That makes it worth it for me. My soon to be ex-wife? I dunno. She is broken to a point and deeply scared by all of this. Nothing I did, or so I am told, effected the ultimate outcome of our marriage, it's demise... So I can take small amounts of comfort in the fact that it wasn't me that directly hurt her so badly, but she was/is hurt nonetheless. Maybe in time she will get it all together, that is my hope for her, but I have seen significantly less "ruin" someone's life because they let it.
I am in NO way saying to ignore your heart! I am just saying be smarter than I was. If you see absolutely no reason to be apprehensive, then don't be. Just don't ignore the potential pitfalls of such an age gap like I did.
I hope that you understand where I am coming from with this post. My concern is equal for you and your fiancee--Many times here we only focus on the man and not the fiancee, that's why I point that out--and it is my hope that you have a happy and fullfilled life :c)
You just sound so much like I did that I felt I had to say something. I sincerely hope you understand my intent ;c)
Keep the Faith!
H
