Response to Howard's post and update.

[kevin]

Hi.  I've been lurking as I do everyday, but I don't always post.

First, I want to say to Howard that i'm glad things are looking up.  You deserve to be happy.  Just be extremely careful about whom you get involved with.  I'm sure after your experience, you will be.  As some say (psychiatrists, relatives, etc.), be careful of the "rebound syndrome".  It's been said many times, and I've read it too, that immediately after a relationship has involuntarily ended, it's easy for that person to fall for the first individual that expresses interest.  It's easy to overlook the cons because you feel so overwhelmed.  I perhaps was in that situation after my divorce.  Falling in love is indeed a refreshing feeling after something like a divorce, but as they say, be careful.  Then again, everybody's mileage may vary.  When I was little, my father remarried about a year after my parents divorced, and it was not only the best thing for him, but the best thing for me and my brothers as well.  I'm not a preacher, but I say have faith in God and pray to Him.  God's grace and mercy is ultimately your only hope for happiness.

On my part, I met another pinay right here in the good 'ole USA.  She's a very nice girl, warm, mabait, and friendly.  I was introduced by her uncle.  She's here on a tourist visa and will be returning to the Philippines next month.  She's a respiratory therapist in the Philippines, and comes from a very well-to-do family.

Upon meeting her, I liked her alot.  I wanted to date her for the short time she had in Rhode Island, and then correspond with her after she left.  There were butterflies in my stomach the moment we met.  I inquired about her.  But the reality was is that she just liked me as a friend and did not want to go any further.  Needless to say, I was disappointed, but I can understand.  It's frusteration when you like somebody or find her attractive, but she does not feel the same about you.  Especially if you think you've connected intellectually and emotionally.

Anyways, I called Joy in the Philippines.  She's a friend of Vemila Weiche whom I was introduced to in November 2000.  We exchanged a couple of e-mails.  I liked her.  But then I never heard from her again, and Analyn came along.  Last week I called Vemila and Carl.  Vemila said that I should call Joy and that she likes surprises.  So last Thursday (I mean Friday morning after midnight), I called Joy.  We talked for about 1/2 hour.

Joy was indeed quite surprised.  We had trouble understanding each other's English.  Cebuano is her dialect.  She seems friendly, talkative and bubbly.  I told her I'd e-mail her, but I haven't heard from her yet on e-mail.  I felt uncomfortable about approaching Joy because she knows Analyn.  They work at the same place.  But Vemila is much closer to Joy than to Analyn, and as far as Vemila knew, Joy and Analyn were not that close.  Well, inspite of what happened with Analyn, I'm placing my trust and faith in Vemila and Joy.  From talking to Vemila, she seems like a trustworthy person, and she was sorry about what happened about Analyn.  She did not know Analyn that well.  She said long ago, Joy was wondering why she never heard from me again, and that Joy does not have a boyfriend.  So I though I'd give it a shot.  Maybe I'll call her again this week.

It seems that Loren Lagarda is a black cloud over my chances, and those of alot of other people, for finding love.  I'm disgusted about the whole issue.  Last week, I was browsing one of the sites that she's going after.  I did not see anything wrong, immoral, of poor character, or in poor taste, about that site.  Now the operators are branded as criminals.  If anything, I'm sure that Lagarda has her own sense of nationalism, and she is xenophobic.  Speciafically she regards Filipino-White/Western relationships as immoral.  From what strikes me, I see her pro-Philippine policy in the same light as Adolf Hitler's pro-Germany policy, but just not as extreme.  Remember, she's trying to articulate what is the true definition of a "mail-order bride", which extends to any infinite number of possible circumstances so long is the woman is pinay and the man is white/western.  I see a parallel to how Adolf Hitler was legally defining a Jew to mean alot more than the creed an individual chose to practice.  (If I remember correctly, any German who had at least one grand-parent who was a Jew, was thus legally a Jew, and subject to the provisions of the law)

This Saturday, I'm going to a Filipino birthday party.  This woman works at the same place I do.  I'm hoping that perhaps through networking, I'll eventually cross paths with a very special and beautiful woman.  I shall keep you all posted.

Cheers,

Kevin

[Ray]

... in response to Response to Howard's post and update., posted by kevin on Feb 26, 2002

Loren Legarda is a “black cloud” over your chances? Kevin, forget about Senator Legarda. She’s just another politician blowing smoke out her arse to get more votes. And forget about that petition! You are not a prospective voter to her so your opinion will not count for diddly.

You mentioned that you are hoping to hook up with a “very special and beautiful woman”? That’s nice, but have you seriously considered a very special and ugly woman? Think about it. There are some real advantages to having an ugly wife. If she’s ugly enough, you won’t ever have to worry about her messing around behind your back like the last one did. And you’ll know that she probably isn’t after your money or a green card because she will be so hard up for a man that she’ll take the first guy that comes along, no matter how much money he has or what country he is from (LOL!).

That reminds me, I saw the ugliest Filipina in church the other day sitting in front of us. I mean she was OOOOOOOOOGLY! How ugly was she? She looked like she ran through an ugly jungle and all the trees fell on her head! She was with her husband, a decent looking American guy. And you know what? They looked so happy together, and they had the cutest little baby you ever saw. Now that guy had the right idea! Somebody kept cutting SBDs in church and they were REALLY gross! I don’t know if it was her or not, but I wouldn’t be the least bit surprised. What a woman!

Oh well, just wanted to give you something to think about… :-)

Ray

[Bear]

... in response to Response to Howard's post and update., posted by kevin on Feb 26, 2002

Sonya is a very nice girl.  29 Y.O. and an operating room nurse.  Very religious and humble.

Bear

[Jimbo]

... in response to Response to Howard's post and update., posted by kevin on Feb 26, 2002

Hi Kev,

That sounds good.  No hurry, plenty of fish in the sea.  Remember all those lovely Cambodian girls at the Lowell Folk Festival?  Opportunity is everywhere and you're doing the right thing by putting more than one line in the water.  You only need one keeper.

Compatibility is the key - I think you need a woman who likes utots )  And a woman who enjoys feeding her man.  I noticed that Sally was particularly pleased when cooking for you.  I asked her why and she said "Because when I put those foods in front of Kevin, it's gone!" -LOL

As for Adolf Lagarda, try not to worry about her too much.  Those types will always be found here in the USA as well, and all we can do is keep the faith and put the truth out there for all to see.

BTW, comparing a Filipina's policies to Hitler is a bit over the top but Ray must be in especially high spirits today because he just let it slide on by -ROFL!

Jim

[jon]

... in response to Re: update, posted by Jimbo on Feb 26, 2002

What!  Under my very nose?!  Why did I  move to Florida?

Jon

[Jimbo]

... in response to lovely Cambodian girls, posted by jon on Feb 26, 2002

Hello Jon!

You'll be back and they'll be waiting... unless you fall for a lovely Latina down there again )

Jim

[jon]

... in response to Re: lovely Cambodian girls, posted by Jimbo on Feb 26, 2002

I have been here since Jan and have been looking for work (it's been since last May for me).  At least I have been warm and the palms and ocean are neat.  I worked a week as a chimney sweep, a day as a trade show registration person, and now I have hooked up with a startup consulting company ( for a week or more).

The wild brazian has benm mildly annoying, mildly helpful.

I'm around, not much to post, at least anything on topic.

Jon
Unemployment: not just a job, it's an adventure

[Stephen]

... in response to Latinas and FL, posted by jon on Feb 26, 2002

Sorry to hear about your unemployment.

Hang in there.  And best of luck.

Stephen & Tess

[tomtneal]

... in response to Response to Howard's post and update., posted by kevin on Feb 26, 2002

REBOUND
May not be as bad as you think i met Jessica while i was in the process of the big D we are now married 3 years and very happy.
tneal

[Howard]

... in response to Response to Howard's post and update., posted by kevin on Feb 26, 2002

Kevin,

Thanks dude.  I hope that you find someone as wonderful as I have and I hope that you find the happiness that you deserve!  

If it makes you feel any better.  My friend is not the first to express interest in me since my seperation.  In fact she is the third.  Not that I'm a lady killer, I was aquitted :c)  LOL, but for some reason women seem to graviate toward a guy in pain.  I guess it's in discussing the relationship that they find, at least with me, things that they are looking for for themselves.  I don't pretend to know the reason, but I am more popular now than I have ever been, but it doesn't mean anything unless the right person is interested, ya know?  I have gone over and over it in my head, to make SURE that this is not the case of rebound syndrome that I have expirienced in the past.  I'm sure everyone has gone through it to one degree or another.  But I feel very confident and certain that this is just a case or pecular timing and that what I am feeling is the begining of something that I will cherish for the rest of my life, God willing :c)  Trust me, if I would've hooked up with the first one, it WOULD definitely have been on the rebound.  We had very little in common except our lonliness and desire for a stable relationship.  She's pretty cool, we are friends because we decided to not take it beyond that, and maybe I could've found contentment with her, but I wouldn't feel the happiness that I feel now.

With Ayesa I had many questions that I just blew off as cultural differences, now I know that I was fooling myself.  With Gerlie I have no apprehension and am throroughly enjoying spending time getting to know her.  We are both treading carefully, with our eyes open.  I am just begining to find out what it's like to care about someone that actually has my best interest at heart.  It's a very nice and comforting feeling :c)

Hey, maybe she has a pal for you, I could ask :c)

Keep the Faith Brutha!  I am :c)

H

[Dave H]

... in response to Thanks Kev..., posted by Howard on Feb 26, 2002

Hi H,

Maybe it's that James Dean guy in pain thing or it could be your after shave. ;o))) Since you can only choose one...now you are probably feeling bad about giving Bear such a hard time about being a Mormon. ;o))) (Sorry Bear, I had to get that in). Anyway...keep knocking em dead Bro! I've got a feeling that you and Crooning K are going to be "Big Pimpin."

Dave H.