She's Gone.

[Brazilophile]

My fiancee left for Brazil earlier this evening.  We came back Friday from visiting my family last week.  That visit had both positive and negative events.  Overall, we are both very impressed with each other.

I think I was most impressed with her patience and accomodation of my faults.  Based on my prior experiences with women, I had expected some degree of complaining about lack of attention, a less than impressive standard of living, stinginess, or something.  Nothing!  When I couldn't pay a lot of attention to her she accepted it and enjoyed the attention I could give her when I was able.

She was most impressed with my even-temperedness.  Yesterday night, when we were talking about what we learned about each other, she said she had been expecting to fight, quarrel, or argue over some things, based on her experience with other men.  In the total of 3 weeks together on this trip, we had not one ugly disagreement about anything.  Nor had we when I visited her for 3 weeks in May.

I will start posting more detailed reports soon.  I learned some interesting insights from my fiancee about women looking for foreign husbands.  I think most of you will be surprised and disappointed.

[Hoda]

... in response to She's Gone., posted by Brazilophile on Aug 14, 2005


You've always had a way of "keeping it real" despite those with contrary opinions. I know, that I'm not alone in wanting to read your detailed reports. It's great that you two had these discussions on issues that could have easily BLOWN-UP in to a full fledge fight, that you both might have regretted later. With any relationship, you're gonna have "those moments"...one of the keys is keeping cool & discussing things in a civil manner....

Thanks again & take care....

[valleydude]

... in response to She's Gone., posted by Brazilophile on Aug 14, 2005

Nice post... I really needed that one. I have had this on my mind for a while.

There have been times that I found myself wanting to hold back in conversations. In the past some of these conversations would normally lead to an argument with the girls I dated too. I'll find myself preparing the defense before I even finish answering and then these girls will just blow my mind with their reaction.

The last girl I was seeing here broke it off because I didn't own a home. She said: "V-Dude, God you know we have great chemistry. We get along so good, but I really need someone with a home." The truth is that we really did have nice chemistry and it really was about owning a home. She wasn't trying to let me down easy. I said: "Well, I'm working on it. Give me about 3 years. Can I call you when I get one?" She said: "Oh Yes!!!" I just laughed and jetted.

Definitely post the insight even if it is the green card answer.

V-Dude

[jediknight]

... in response to Re: She's Gone., posted by valleydude on Aug 15, 2005

"In the past some of these conversations would normally lead to an argument with the girls I dated too. I'll find myself preparing the defense before I even finish answering and then these girls will just blow my mind with their reaction."

what was brought up in these converstions that led to arguments?
JK

[valleydude]

... in response to Re: Re: She's Gone., posted by jediknight on Aug 15, 2005

Yeah it's money, goals, ways to handle issues, the attention factor.

My comment was mostly contrasting between girls I have dated here and the ones down south that I have begun to know. Sure they aren't all gems, but the girls down south never cease to amaze me.

For example: If I have to make a call and say I am working late, to make a couple of extra bucks, I am always on the defense, just because of past experiences here. Many girls here would give me the ol' "Don't you want to spend time with me??" "You never...." You don't...." blah blah blah. No matter what I might say it becomes an endless battle trying to make things well. Where as a latina has said to me: "I like that you think about the future" and that is the end of it. I am just blown away when this happens.

V-Dude

[stefang]

... in response to Re: Re: She's Gone., posted by jediknight on Aug 15, 2005

Money probably 90% of the time. Women want that house for the meal ticket in the 50/50 chance of future divorce.

[nocomment]

... in response to She's Gone., posted by Brazilophile on Aug 14, 2005

[This message has been edited by nocomment]

"...surprised and disappointed." They're only in it for the money or the green card? What do I win?
Incidentally, as you have experience with Brazil, what can you say about the Brazilian "aphrodisiacs" Catuaba and Muira Puama? Both are herbs, also available in vitamin shops here. Personally, I think that attractive women are aphrodisiacs.

[Brazilophile]

... in response to The hook, posted by nocomment on Aug 14, 2005

"They're only in it for the money or the green card?"

You are half right!

I have never heard of the aphrodesiacs you mentioned, or of any other Brazilian aphrodesiacs.