More of the same old same old from the same old usuals. I won't hold my breath waiting for another substantive trip report from one of you guys.
The last major part of my fiancee's trip was a visit with my family. I was born and raised in Montreal, Canada, and my family still lives there. This trip did not take place on a positive note. My parents had been getting on in years, were in declining health, and had moved to an assisted living residence 2 years ago. My mother passed away this spring. My father's health declined rapidly after her death and was in the hospital during our visit. He is now pushing 90 and needs to go into a nursing home. My sister, who lives in Virginia, and I had a serious argument over our father's care 2 days before our trip. I plunged my fiancee into this maelstrom. In addition, after we arrived in Montreal, I learned that my aunt and one cousin (female) were in another city attending a wedding, and my other cousin (also female) was occupied with her own health issues.
I spent very little time attending to my fiancee's needs and did not show her very much of Montreal. I spent the days talking to doctors, talking to the social worker handling my father's case, calling nursing homes, going to my father's bank, talking with my father's lawyer, talking with lawyers for me, and I spent the nights resting so I was not much of a fiance to her. During this time my fiancee was extremely patient, understanding, and accomodating. I dragged her all around the city, handling business in English and French, barely talking to her, and she did not complain one bit.
My father was very pleased to meet her. They hit it off well, despite limited communication as I was not always there to provide translation services. After 3 days of just us and my father, my aunt and my cousins replied to my messages. We arranged to meet the next day, our last full day in Montreal. My two cousins adored my fiancee. One speaks some Spanish, so between poor English and poor Spanish they were able to communicate well enough. They all seemed to be in heaven examining the engagement ring and talking about whatever women talk about with each other when it comes to relationships. My older cousin exchanged email addresses with my fiancee and they plan to correspond using babblefish or something similar. Later we visited my aunt and she also hit if off well with my fiancee. My sister did not make the trip to Montreal to meet my fiancee but they did speak some by phone. My cousins (both divorced) have children in their 20's but we did not meet them. My fiancee felt very well received by my family and enjoyed meeting everyone despite the strained circumstances.
My fiancee and I learned a great deal about each other, all of it positive. We have no doubts that we are very well matched and will be very happy together. I will emphasize again what other have said before: Get to know your lady well before you marry her. I feel that knowing her well means observing her and her family in her environment AND observing her reactions to you and your family in your environment.
