Spanish translations

[BobEsponja]

Hi Guys,

Things are proceeding fine with my girl and the long distance thing we've got going. I am planning to get down there in the next few months when work allows.

The only doubt I've had recently was with me telling her - te quiero. I've said it twice so far, once on the phone and once in a message.

Maybe I'm a sap for saying it without having met her, but hey, I'm calling it how I feel it. Anyway, both times she has responded - me too (yo tambien). She hasn't said - yo te quiero - to me yet herself.

Kinda makes me wonder because in English when you tell someone I love you and they say me too, it's kind of not the same emotion as saying I love you too. You know, using the L-word.

Am I the only that thinks like this about this subject? My Spanish is pretty good but sometimes the meaning just doesn't compute you know?

Below are some of the things she has written me in Spanish. I was hoping to get some feedback from you guys fluent in Spanish about how sincere she might be. Of course it's damn near impossible over the internet but hey.

Stuff she wrote...
Acabo de escuchar la canción que me enviaste, y si, estoy dispuesta a abrir mi corazon para ti, quiero que seas mi bendición, mi luz y mi sol... Tu eres todo.

Solo quiero que sepas que siento que eres el hombre que siempre he buscado en mi vida. Te agradezco por enseñarme que es posible realmente ser feliz...Besos

Tu eres lo mas sorprenderte que ha pasado en esta vida. Eres precioso! Te espero.

Tu eres la chispa que encendió el motor de mi corazón y las ganas de ser mejor cada dia. Muchisimo besos para ti.

Igual me encanto haber hablado contigo, me pareces una persona muy agradable y lindo. Espero poder hablar muy pronto contigo nuevamente. Muchos besos y abrazos.

Maybe I'm reading too much into it. Maybe she isn't isn't ready to say it yet, and a bit of patience from me is needed.

Gracias.
BobEsponja

[BobEsponja]

... in response to Spanish translations, posted by BobEsponja on Jul 11, 2005

Well I didn't have to wait long for that to happen. I've just let things roll on quietly without mentioning it. She told me on the phone today "te quiero mucho". Dunno why I was so impatient or insecure. Have to work on that.
Thanks all.
By the way she is from Peru, not Colombia. And she has already taken her profile off amigos.com, which to me is a good sign she's serious. She only signed up in April. Damn I'm glad I checked that site out!
Buena suerte a todos.
BobEsponja

[papi]

... in response to she said it, posted by BobEsponja on Jul 13, 2005

Bob, you sound like a smart guy. Take her statement of love with a grain of salt. it is very positive that she said it and shows a lot of interest but dont get your hopes up until you meet. you have not met, right? also, have a backup plan when you do. True love does not form over the internet or telephone. It does not form even over a couple months together. True love takes time

[BobEsponja]

... in response to Re: she said it, posted by papi on Jul 13, 2005

You're right Papi. But then again no two relationships are quite the same.

Is my understanding that "te quiero" and "te amo" are slightly different ways of saying "I love you" correct?

"Te amo" is more meaningful? You fluent guys out there, what is your call?
BobEsponja

[caslug]

... in response to Re: Re: she said it, posted by BobEsponja on Jul 13, 2005

As Papi said, take whatever the chica said w/ a grain of salt until AT LEAST you meet them in person.  Many latinas i've met in S.America are VERY affectionate with actions AND WORDS.  Most americans guys ONLY say I LOVE YOU in two instances a) we wanna get laid or b) we REALLY mean it.  We don't throw it out there very often ESPECIALLY the second one.  BUT i've notice Latinas say it with alot more frequency.  Doesnt mean they're lying, it just means that's how they feel AT THE MOMENT(aqui & ahora).  Things can change for one day to the next.

[papi]

... in response to Re: Re: she said it, posted by BobEsponja on Jul 13, 2005

both are expressions of romantic love - which is premature in your case. saying it is ok and a positive sign yet again you need to meet and spend time together before these expressions can take on any real meaning. I stress again, have a backup plan - maybe an agency lined up in the event things dont unfold as planned

[jediknight]

... in response to Re: Re: she said it, posted by BobEsponja on Jul 13, 2005

te quiero mucho is..i really like you a lot...but te amo is much stronger, this is love you.

[Red Clay]

... in response to Re: Re: Re: she said it, posted by jediknight on Jul 13, 2005

[This message has been edited by Red Clay]

Te quiero can be, and is, said to a relative, sibling, parent, etc. to mean "I love you". Te amo is only for your special lady, gf, fiancee, spouse, etc.

[papi]

... in response to Re: Re: Re: Re: she said it, posted by Red Clay on Jul 13, 2005

te quiero is also used between lovers

[utopiacowboy]

... in response to Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: she said it, posted by papi on Jul 13, 2005

Yes, spouses and lovers will say te quiero but you can say te quiero to almost anyone that you care about. You don't say te amo to your dog or your friends unless you're sleeping with them.

[papi]

... in response to Re: Re: Re: she said it, posted by jediknight on Jul 13, 2005

my impression is that te quiero is heard more often and is an expression of love stronger than I like you. TQM or te quiero mucho - i love you very much

[OkieMan]

... in response to Spanish translations, posted by BobEsponja on Jul 11, 2005

Bob,

I am the last one to try to give you advice on all the ends and outs of a relationship with a latina.  Having said that, I can tell that I just recently came out of a situation where I corresponded with a latina for 5 months.  In May, I went to see her in Cali, and I was even more impressed.  I thought all was well, and then I came home, and everything started to unravel.  However, that is not to say that everyone will have the same experiences.  In fact, I would say right the opposite.  So, basically, just go see her and then only time will tell.  But,  don't read too much into great, romantic emails.  I had many, sweet, romantic emails and thought I knew the woman; but I did not.  Other men here have had great success. Who can figure it out?  I can't.  I wish you every happiness; just don't get your hopes too high at this point.  Then there is the the part of having a Plan B.  Well, that is too long to go into, but it is a good idea.  Best of luck to you.

                          OkieMan

[lapentier]

... in response to Re: Spanish translations, posted by OkieMan on Jul 11, 2005

On the issue of "writing it" but not "meaning it", is it related to the "scammer" phenomenon?  I wonder if your friend started in the relationship with the idea of using you as possibly a "green card" ticket.  Then, after meeting you, she learned to respect you, and could not follow through with it knowing it would hurt you.

Latins live in a religious culture, and my experience is that Latins I have met have a conscience and a sense of right and wrong.  I suspect a Latino scammer would be more than willing to scam someone if that person were involved in immoral or unethical behavior.  However, he or she may be hesitant to truly scam someone who is genuine in his motives.  Take the "gringo tax" as an example.  The logic goes that since you are a rich American, at least in stereotype, you can well afford to pay more than the going rate for service.  However, that does not mean the hotel is going to take your Visa card and empty everything from your bank account just because you are a gringo--even though a crooked hotel employee might do just that...

I know of Pilipinas that set up sham marriages with willing American accomplices.  If they both have other partners, it is a green-card sham, and stays at that; I have never actually met any of these.  On the other hand, if it is a scam on the American man without his knowledge, the story is very different.  They show the saying that love is composed of actions with the feelings that tend to follow.  So far, I cannot even name one scammer with an unwitting American parter that ever returned to her real husband/boyfriend out of the seven (possibly ten when counting elderly couples).  Out of this group, only two have actually divorced their American partners, and both that have divorced their American partners have married other Americans.

Okie, there is probably something there about which she did not tell you. It could be another fellow, a physical problem, family pressure, or even other children she about which she did not tell you.  She may have lied to you about some part of her background or family situation, and after you left, came to the realization that eventually she would be discovered. Or, if she really did develop feelings for you, she may have feared she would not have the ability to control those feelings in the event this really was an attempt at a green card.  Yes, things may have unraveled after you left for the states, but a gut feeling tells me this is unlikely.

Anybody else have some thoughts?

Mark

[OkieMan]

... in response to Re: Re: Spanish translations, posted by lapentier on Jul 12, 2005

Thanks for the thought, but I would as soon let it die.  I could second guess all of this until I die or retire; but I don't want to.  It bugs me to no end, but I am trying to just let go and move on.

                      OkieMan

[lapentier]

... in response to Re: Re: Re: Spanish translations, posted by OkieMan on Jul 12, 2005

The main reason I posted this response was to show that sometimes when things don't work out, it is for the better.  Being honest and forthright is frequently the best policy, and in this case, it may have really kept you out of trouble.

Best wishes,

Mark