I have been following the discussion on agencies and the girls,the good and the bad that has been going on for seemingly over a week here.
I do not doubt all of the negative stories or experiences.I do think the extent to which they occur could easilly be construed to be alot more than it is from these posts.Seems everybody has jumped on the agencies and only the agency owners themselves are coming to their defense.
I have never had a major problem with an agency.I have had lots of minor problems.They can tend to fortget you unless you are right in their face.So staying at an agency is good I think.Not out of sight,not out of mind.Some of the help can be lazy and just tend to gossip with the other girls,then get on calling for you at 4pm.Guess what?Too late.Sometimes I think they take a single shot at it,then forget it.Or call only a home phone,during the day when the girl is not home,leave a message and forget it.Or not tell you what the girl isw really saying.Does she really want to meet you or is she just excusing?And being directed to certain people.This can be good or bad,but only you know what you like in a woman for sure.
But none of these the big problems talked about here.I still think the agencies are the best way to go for the new guy or the guy who doesn't speak much spanish.And you can meet alot of women quickly.
One guy I know I think really did it right.He spoke little spanish.
He stayed at and agency,met maybe 4-6 women a day for 2 weeks.Then he worked the list of candidates down from 10 to 5 to 2 to one.
He married her after about 3 months and 3 trips after meeting her.I know thats risky,but ita all risky.He claims to be extremely happy with her,but they are still waiting for her visa.I think meeting alot of women,like 50 plus helps.There is more chance you will meet one who seems to really care about you.All the problem relationships I have seen have had red flags screaming loud enough to put out the meassage even with bad language communication.The biggest problem I have seen is guys getting hooked or going bonkers over a woman who doesn't care for them even though she pretends too.But they are now tone deaf to red flags,because they are so hooked on the woman.My main advice would be if there is anything less than absolute response from the woman and a total absense of excuses or mysteries
its smart to move on.You probably have the wrong girl.
OK,some stats of sorts,from my experience.Its not nearly as bleak as come recent posts would have us belive.
All of these numbers are from I guys I personally know.I do not include guys posting here who seem to have good things going.
The California group,my personal circle of friends married to Colombianas.5 seemingly happy marriages.2 divorces,including me.These people have been married 3-5 years each.One guy who came here a week,did it all wrong meeting only one girl he was not interested in but spending all his time with her.He has never been bacj,its been 4 years.
The Cali group.People I know here or who I have met here or who have stayed here.I was counting this morning,probably did not remember alot of people.
One guy married 2 years,some issues,still together.
2 guys married less than one year,both seemingly happy.wive no visa yet.
9 guys still looking.Some come here fairly often,some not,they seem to be enjoying the chase.
4 guys not married but seemingly happy with what they found.I put myself in this group.
3 guys who just like to chase hookers.One guy says he is interested in meeting a woman for a relationship,but never gets around to it.This can be a issue,its so easy to just bang good looking hookers that if that is fun for you never move on or get realistic about what you can have in a real relationship.These guys are doing 2 to 4 a day.A whole different thing I think than a guy like myself who will do it if no sex for 2 weeks but thinks its a poor substitute.
One guy still with his wife but not happy about it.
I probably forgot alot of people.This as kind of quick and dirty.
Another thing about agencies.If you don't like them don't use them.Other ideas?Go for it but lets hear results not speculation.
AND ,OF course,spanish is important.Some people will not agree at all but I agree with Jamie its not essentail.But you better do every thing else right.
I for one could do lots better with it.I come off alot better in person than some agency worker is going to describe,particularly when age issues come up.Meeting them in person age is not an immediate issue.Appearance is.But without good spanish this is very difficult.So I know I would be alot better of with good spanish.
My number one girl speaks little english but understands english fairly well .One guy says its because I give off so much body language and jestures.I talk to her in a mix of spanish and english.My friend who is a purist and studying spanish very hard says its amazing how well we comminicate giving both of our levels of the others language.I am totally confident of this girl.I know I can trust her and she would make a super wife.I just do not have a 100% commotment for her.
BUT.the other day,with her family,fast conversation,I am getting only 10% or so of it.Just the jist of it.SO I know spanish is important.But not as essential as the right girl,who can let you know she is the right girl without good language.
Just my quick thought this morning.I have wanted to respond on this for awhile.
Pete
