Bear's Trip Report Chapter #1

[Honey]

Hi all from the R.P.

This trip is a strange one.  It was one I never really thought I would take.  I actually thought that Honey would get here long before I had a chance to make it back.  The “fubar” going on in our government is so depressing.  There is just no way that it should have taken 11 months for a man to be with his wife!!  How our government got away from strong family values just is beyond my comprehension.  I finally got a response from Sen. Gramm a few days before I left, just as Honey was getting notice of Packet #3 from the K-3 application.  Now I wonder if his help might even actually hinder the K-3 and force everything to the I-130?  I sure hope not!!  But seeing the way things have gone lately I would not be surprised.

The leaving date was kind of a surprise even for me.  I never really “planned” the trip.  I know I would come just to see her because of the delays in the immigration process but the date was never “firm”.  When I saw that she got her packet #3 and one of the 2 jobs I applied for gave me a firm “yes we will hire you”, I immediately quit my “contract” job.  Then I got all the I-134 papers completed and when the new employer agreed to give me a letter for the immigration process I realized I had 2 ½ weeks I could use to be with my wife.  Maybe even help her through the process and bring her home with me.  I called Gina Wong at USA Global Travel in Dallas and she got me tickets and is holding on account moneys to pay for Honey’s ticket should it be needed.

It was fun telling Honey I was coming.  She knew I would but since neither of us knew when it was a surprise.  I love surprising her.  There just isn’t a more beautiful girl in all of Gods creations when I see that smile of hers.

Honey had gone to Manila with Lily and others (see below – wow!!!) to be there for support and to finish her CFO requirements so she could get her passport.  So meeting her in Manila was easy.  The plane trip was so long!!!  21 hours from Houston to Detroit to Nagoya, Japan to Manila.  This time I did not go 1st class and man was I cramped!!  On the 1st leg I sat with an elderly Filipina from Tampa Bay area and her mother who were heading back home (not sure why).  I ended up waiting on them the whole trip?  Every one was saying I adopted them.  One was in a wheel chair and the other on a walker.  All I did was stop them from having to move around unnecessarily and see that they got the help they requested.  Many of the Filipinas on the trip complimented me for helping.

On the second leg I sat by a Filipina Gynecologist and talked about the babies I’d be making pretty soon (Gossshhhhhh!!!! – hehehe).  She was a very nice person.  She gave me a reference to a great lasik doctor here in Manila – so now if I could get Honey to let me (Plsssssss).  She is so paranoid I will get hurt!?  She travels around the world like most doctors going to different conventions and so forth.  She had just left one in New Jersey and was going to one in 2 weeks in Sidney.  She related an amazing story to me about her niece I thought I would add to this trip report.  The niece was 17.  She went to a nightclub here in Manila and had herself sold?  What?  Yes, sold?  An American wrestler bought her.  They fell in love and he got her pregnant.  The family likes him and wanted them to get married but the Catholic Church would not allow it until she was 18 (what-she had a child?)  The doctor took this girl to the side and told her that everyone in the family decided she better not mess up her and had better be a good wife and do her husband right.  They are now here in the states.  I was somewhat surprised at the story but it is good to hear/see that some families here are not after what they can get from Kanos.  She also says she thinks she might be able to help with the business I am trying to get started.  I think it pays to be open at times.

The trip started off pretty hard.  All I could think about was Honey and the thought of her hair, her scent, feeling her arms around me, get that awesome kiss of hers, feeling that complete and totally un-inhibited love I feel when I am near her.  Since I flew Northwestern this time I landed at the old Airport.  Should have looked up the old advice about what and where to go. As we landed I started to panic a little about wondering if I would have a hard time finding Honey but the Filipinas I had befriended on the trip made sure I got through everything quite easily.  Left the baggage claim crossed the street, went down the ramp and looked across the street – there she was waving at me!!!   I made my way cross the street (who needs cross walks – I know they taxis will stop!).  Gave her the biggest “bearhug” and hiss she had had in near a year.  I said,  “Where do we go?” That’s when I noticed the humidity; I was in a long sleeve shirt.  I know Houston is humid but no one will ever convince me that any place in the USA is as bad as Manila or Davao humidity-wise.  

We grabbed each other’s and hand and after looking like a “dufus” trying to get through a gate with my bag we headed across the street to a waiting cab.  He had been waiting an hour already.  I thought oooops here’s a big tip.  But it was actually only P500, which I thought was great.  As we walked toward the cab Honey suddenly stopped me and there, sitting on a curb waiting, was Lily and Helen.  Helen!?  Yes that Helen!!  All I can say is Zebson you let a gorgeous, intelligent Filipina get away and I know a lot more than you told everyone else.  Things like she gave up a scholarship to the UK to be with you, that you cursed her in front of her family which caused her all kinds of grief with her family, that you abandoned her in Baguio with P5000 and a letter telling her to find someone else and yet she still loved you enuff to see it through the Fiancée Visa process, that you never helped her financially while she was here in the states and even told her not to eat your food, that she went and stayed with a Filipino family to take care of an elderly man there – not go see some other guy.  Rather than believe her or even ask you went behind her back to a co-worker and asked them.  Where as, she is now trying to immigrate to Holland to marry another guy it was after, you not during or before you.  She didn’t defend herself here because she didn’t want to cause others problems and that you always hid the fact you even posted here, to her.

The cab trip to the Palm Hotel was like before.  It was late night, around midnight and as we drove, I actually recognized many places.  Everyone was teasing us saying there would be no sleeping tonight, even the cab driver.  Well, I know they were right but…  hehehe.

This morning we got up and went down for breakfast.  While sitting at the table another Kano heard Honey and I talking.  He came over to ask me for advise on how and what to file, whether or not to marry here or there.  I referenced him to Mag-Anak and Planet-Love and gave him all the info I could about the different visas.  

Honey is sleeping now, I think she not get much sleep last night.  When she wakes up we’ll get some money changed and pick up Lily and Helen and go to the Zoo here in Manila.  

More to come.

[Ray]

... in response to Bear's Trip Report Chapter #1, posted by Honey on Nov 15, 2001

Bear,

Has that tropical heat fried your brain already? I was just starting to enjoy your trip report when it suddenly went down the toilet.

First, you start blaming the government for keeping you away from your wife for 11 months. What? Weren’t you just there 10 months ago (January)? When did you finally file the petition after you got back? Did the government forbid you to leave the country until now? Let’s be fair to the government here. You knew how long this process was likely to take when you decided to marry over there, right?

Second, you somehow managed to get in another dig at the Catholic Church. I know from your past comments that you haven’t much love for the church, but since you married a Catholic, you really should do a little studying up on the subject. Now let’s see if I got this right. A 17 year-old hooker sells her arse to some American pervert who in turn knocks her up. Her parents like the guy and want her to get married to him? (Maybe they are the ones who “sold” her?) Anyway, the only one in this story that you pass judgement on is the Catholic Church for not allowing her to marry until she was 18. What the heck has the Catholic Church got to do with this? Philippine law, NOT the church, requires the parties to be at least 18 years of age to get married in the Philippines. And they don’t have to get married in the church, they can get married in a civil wedding (IF she is 18). Sheeesh!

Thirdly, you bring up some old story that has already been buried for some months now and trash Zebson in front of the whole world, practically calling him a liar. You are starting to sound like a gossiping woman! If you’re not a part of the problem, and you’re not a part of the solution, then why even bring it up? Let it rest man! If she wants to defend herself and tell her side of the story, let HER do it!

And what are you doing with 2 other chicks on your second honeymoon anyway? Dump them and spend some time alone with your wife for God’s sake. This should be a happy time so don’t waste it flaming others on the Internet. And stay out of that hot sun! :-)

Just my $.02

Say hi to Honey.

Ray

[Honey]

... in response to Very Disappointed, posted by Ray on Nov 16, 2001

Ahhh Ray!

It doesn't take a scholar to see that I fiancee can get there quicker than a spouse and it did take almost 9 months to get the K-3 into effect.  That's what I mean by bad government.

I am not condemning the church for not allowing the marriage just that it seemed odd to me that the family wanted them to marry but it was not allowed in the church.  Whether or not shes a hooker is really more that she is a typical teen who has a lot of disreguard for tradition and and what is the right thing to do.

Well as several others posted here - it doesn't smell right what was said and I know several others involved who say we did not get the whole story and what was said wasn't true.  I do not think that someone should be judged without both sides of the story being posted.  Now it has.  I actually am not deciding who is right or wrong in the matter just posting information left out that does seem to cloud the issue.

Bear

[Ray]

... in response to Re: Very Disappointed, posted by Honey on Nov 16, 2001

Bear,

I think you missed my whole point.

1. I don’t understand why you blame the government for the long wait when you could easily have decided to go the fiancée visa route if you wished to. My point was: you knew what you were getting into when you went to the Philippines to get married, so why bash the government now? They are at least trying to fix the long waiting time for a spouse, but you and I were just a little late to take advantage of it. So why cry about it?

2. Why would it seem odd that they were not allowed to marry in the church? They are not allowed to be married BY THE GOVERNMENT! Of course the church can’t marry them without a marriage license from the government! And what’s this “typical teen” stuff? If she “sold herself”, then I think it’s reasonable to label her a prostitute, right? Don’t sound so typical to me.

3. Yes Bear, all these horror stories do have two sides like you said. But the point is that YOU don’t know either side! So therefore, you’re only passing on GOSSIP.

Now please go enjoy your time with your wife. And forget about the Manila Zoo. It’s a waste of time IMO :-) Take the trip over to Corregidor.

Ray

[Honey]

... in response to One more try, posted by Ray on Nov 16, 2001

There are lots of reasons to do things and just because they do not agree with yours doesn't mean that the one contrary to yours is wrong.  Thats controlling.  Try reading Personality Plus and find out what your coloric attitude means and then also find out its okay for others to not agree.

You shouldn't always assume that when someone says something it always means what you want it to.  But I guess that props up your insecurities.

Bear

[Ray]

... in response to no - you don't get it, posted by Honey on Nov 16, 2001

MY insecurities?

OK Bear, If you can’t stand it when someone disagrees with you, then I’ll agree with you just to make you feel better.

Yes, I agree that the US Government is FUBAR and is conspiring to keep you away from your wife. I think you should sue the bastards!

Yes, it IS odd that the Catholic Church wouldn’t allow an underage girl to marry the wrestler who bought her and knocked her up, even though they could not legally get a marriage license. Very odd indeed! I think they should have performed the ceremony anyway because after all, she had a child, right?

Yes, I agree that Zebson is really a dork after hearing the other side of the story. I think we need more of this kind of gossip on this board.

How’s that? You feel better now Bear? Gee, I hope so.

I can’t wait for the next episode! :-)

Ray

[Mr Kabalaka]

... in response to One more try, posted by Ray on Nov 16, 2001

Its a sight for sore eyes !  I feel sorry for them poor critters! Humabdos

[Ray]

... in response to Thats right FORGET THE ZOO!, posted by Mr Kabalaka on Nov 16, 2001

Mr Humabalaka,

I haven't been to the zoo in Manila for some years now. The first time I went in 1969 and it was really pathetic. The poor animals looked like they were just standing around waiting to croak. From your reply I would guess that it hasn't changed much in recent years.

May, what do you think of the Manila Zoo? Have you been there lately? Maybe I'm just spoiled because I'm in San Diego where they have a world class zoo…

Ray

[Lori]

... in response to Manila Zoo, posted by Ray on Nov 16, 2001

I visited the saigon zoo. They treated their animals terrrible. Chained monkey's by their necks, porkipines with most of their quails out, otters in dirty filthy water. It was really hard to watch, and I am no animal rights activist.
I wonder how the manila zoo's compare to U.S. zoo's?

[may10]

... in response to Manila Zoo, posted by Ray on Nov 16, 2001

No, Ray.....unfortunately, though it's relatively near my place of residence,  the last time I was there was about 35 (?) yrs ago.  

Have heard however that it has undergone quite a bit changing in the past recent months (but not to the standard of your zoos there).  Well, I have to say,  we are quite happy with anything that can provide us wholesome entertainment.  *S*

[aedude]

... in response to Re: Manila Zoo, posted by may10 on Nov 16, 2001

Wow what a zoo, I went with Mary and some family in Oct 2000. I thought all the animals were ready to die or on some very good drugs..LOL. When I was there this October Mary asked my if I wanted to go back and told me it was better also, sorry but I passed on it. On a personal note, if you ever get a chance to visit the Singapore Zoo do it, it's one of the best I ever seen.

Chris

[may10]

... in response to Re: Re: Manila Zoo, posted by aedude on Nov 16, 2001

Chris....I really prefer the mountains or the beaches....or sunrises, sunsets, the moon and the stars...MORE than animals.  .....at least these don't bite.  hehehe

[The Mog]

... in response to Re: Re: Manila Zoo, posted by aedude on Nov 16, 2001

Hey now, The Manila zoo isnt THAT bad!. We checked it out a few months ago after shopping at nearby Robinsons Place, and yes, the sidewalks are crumbling, and the cages are dirty, but then is that any different than the rest of Manila? LOL..
The animals had fresh food to eat in their cages, families and children were everywhere and having fun...I had fun and thought it was OK..look at the bright side, the animals are at least off the street! LOL

[Jimbo]

... in response to Re: Re: Re: Manila Zoo, posted by The Mog on Nov 17, 2001

-ROFL!

Last May we went to Corregidor and skipped the zoo.  I like Manila so I guess I'll like the zoo... next time we'll try it )

Jim

[Zebson]

... in response to Bear's Trip Report Chapter #1, posted by Honey on Nov 15, 2001

Bear,
I haven't been posting much at all lately...but I do stop by, every so many days to read..(or lurk as some call it) how you all are doing in your relationships. I was thinking, Wow it's great that..Bear is finally getting together with his wife..That's really good after all the waiting. Well, It's late here and I thought hmmm..I will read how his adventure is going.

Well when I got down to the part about your meeting Helen and Lily and the things you said about me I was stunned...you really fell for her story, but you know for some reason I was not surprized that she said all that too, yes she is rather beautiful on the outside. But the problem with Helen is within, she has learned to lie and she does it well and manipulates things just the way she need to get people on her side. I have heard more than one story from other about her painting terrible pictures of our relationship...And yet all the while she still has been sending me email behind my back still from Manila trying to act as thougth she was my friend. To me it has all been her own way of justifying and trying to make herself believe she was right in what she did. I haven't even posted half the stuff about what happened after I left her at the mall. Simply for the need to try and understand and forgive her over time. It amazes me that after all the time and energy I spent before pouring out my thoughts time and heart posting about what happened and then to hear someone make it all sound like BS. Now that really does bother and upset me...Like I said, I have learned over time about how a person can lie about herself and tell half truths about what really happened in order to make herself feel ok to herself and others. But the fact of the matter is, that I did tell the truth and I know it in my heart and before God. And you can say what ever you want and think what ever you want..but those things are not true in the light she painted it. I was clear in all my postings here prior and I am will go no further in trying to defend myself against Helen and what happened cause I have so much evidense I could really tear her up one side and down the other here by reading her emails from her and her own cousin etc..But what good is that going to do really? Cause I can see that you too have fallen for her words and helplessness story. Just realize that the more you are around someone the more you see the real them. Perhaps because you didn't spend over 2 and half years correspondance about your life and then making 3 trips and spending a lot of money to have her do what she did to me, then you would feel the same way too.

All I can say is good luck and God bless to Honey and you on your trip and in your relationship. I hope your not as gullible and easily taken for a ride as I was. Regardless of what she told you.

Zeb