Filipinas versus Latinas (specifically Colombianas)

[robert angel]

>>Rob I see alot of similarities. My wife too loves gifts for her family.  I am half Italian and had to laugh when a filipina told me I have a nice pointy nose. . I thought she was joking but then realized she meant as a compliment. We have a ton of hot pinays here in San Diego...<<

Yepper, Mambo--My wife's first cousin is in an area in SoCal that's so full of Filipinos and other Asians that sometimes it doesn't feel like she really 'left'  Asia at all. We wish I could take her to places like the Florida Keys, Minneapolis, Davenport, Iowa---Yellowstone and Smoky Mountain Nat. parks--just a cross section, including a more, dare I say 'homogenized America'? What makes our nation great is it's ethnic diversity, but just like the song goes, I think we should all see those 'amber waves of grain' the rockie's purple mountain's majesty--ALL the colors. And snow.

I'm half Italian, half Irish--they do go gaga over our noses. Seems everybody, us and them, wants something new and different--a new flavor. And whether you hear it or not, if you have eyes that aren't brown, they love to talk about and guess how beautiful babies from you would be. And especially in the provinces, where foreigners are much less common--off the beaten path so to speak, they wonder how given 'other' expected physical differences, how we could even ever 'procreate'!

It's so funny to catch their shy but oh so curious glances, hear their giggles and how when I walk away, how they ask my wife "How did you meet him? Does he have any brothers? You mean that internet thing really works?"

The innocence, combined with the beauty and sensuality and how when you're a nice enough guy--i.e. not a creep, how you can fairly easily set up a date for starters, is just amazing. All reasons why I have to remind myself that if I spent long periods of time over there, I'd have to really work hard to 'toe the line' and not screw up everything.

But I see frog like guys from the USA, marrying cuties, bringing them back here and making it work, long term. I don't go in much for the Fil-Am party-clique kind of thing, but I half way expect some of these guys to be packing slide rulers, plastic pencil guards on their plaid shirt pockets and tape holding their horn rimmed eye glasses together!

[utopiacowboy]

So keep in mind, these babes are not mean or flaky, they are being polite! when they give you a number that doesn't exist.

Not just Colombia. There was a whole Seinfeld episode where Elaine was giving out fake phone numbers to guys and once after she looked particularly gruesome she got a fake number from a guy in return.

[utopiacowboy]

The innocence, combined with the beauty and sensuality and how when you're a nice enough guy--i.e. not a creep, how you can fairly easily set up a date for starters, is just amazing. All reasons why I have to remind myself that if I spent long periods of time over there, I'd have to really work hard to 'toe the line' and not screw up everything.

I would be a total hound dog if I lived in Medellin. It's hard enough to keep my hands off my sister-in-law when she's going on with her "Hi honey" routine.

[Hector_Lavoe]

Her flakiness is a Latino thing.

Vikingo: Not disputing anything you said but as UtopiaCowboy noted: it is also a female thing in a very large city with many options.

[Hector_Lavoe]

Maybe outside of some really swank areas of south Florida, I couldn't think of a worse area than southern California for meeting women. I'm sure there's some great ones in both areas, but if I were on the market, I for sure wouldn't start shopping there. They're plenty fast in NYC and Chicago too, but if I had to choose from CA, FL, NY or IL, I'd take the NY and IL in a heartbeat.

Yes. Agreed.

[Elexpatriado]

I have never had a Colombiana give me a fake number, but they have canceled dates on me, sometimes at the last minute. Quite often it is because of the disorganized, chaotic nature of their lives an minds, not because they dont want to go out with you. Other times because they got a better deal.. well, both result  in flaking , it doesn't matter, unless it is a good excuse and she gives you at least an hours waning..


I think costeñas are the worst, but dont have a lot of experience with them. See Jaimie´s website for his discussion on the flakiness of Colombian women..

Not just Colombia. There was a whole Seinfeld episode where Elaine was giving out fake phone numbers to guys and once after she looked particularly gruesome she got a fake number from a guy in return.

[Hector_Lavoe]

That would have been quite a score here in LA for a slightly older guy like yourself.....maybe she found you somewhat engaging, but didn't want to actually get into any sort of relationship....hence the disappearance.   


Fathertime!

I would have considered her a score at 30 or 35.

After a long drought here on the local dating scene I recently met another lady who seems pretty nice/genuine, attractive and interested. Time will tell. As Tom Petty once sang, "Even the losers get lucky sometimes.... ." 

[bcc_1_2]

the big boobs and butt. And more overt displays of passion outside the bedroom.

It's a change from the flat chested/ass gringas that's for sure. I think we can understand why a dude would want a change from that.


Judging by the photos posted of must have latinas I see on here I'd say too many guys idolize women that look like they are some drug lord's side bitch. And they pass right on by the hot girl next door, educated, hasn't slept with everyone in the neighborhood type. But then again the higher strata chicas take more than money...


But that's just my 2 cents.

[fathertime]

I would have considered her a score at 30 or 35.

Well she appeared like she was attractive.  I guess you are referring to the flakiness that of course would be a show stopper rather quickly.

After a long drought here on the local dating scene I recently met another lady who seems pretty nice/genuine, attractive and interested. Time will tell. As Tom Petty once sang, "Even the losers get lucky sometimes.... ." 

From what I've seen, playing by 'the rules' gets most men nowhere. I have numerous friends in their mid to late 40's who have somewhat accidentally wound up single, and not many are having good fortune 'dating' at this age.  Latin America, PI, Russia, If it were me, and If I wanted to be married, I'd be as smart as possible, and roll the dice. Others are built differently and just prefer to live as they are and will in all likelihood wind up elderly, childless, and maybe regretful.   


Fathertime! 

[JWR]

This is a 50,000 word subject that I'm going to attempt to shrink.

I think getting married is a big crap shoot with not the best odds for long term happiness, sex, and success.  If you take this premise into consideration from the beginning, you have to then ask yourself is it worth compromising some things to increase the chance for success.  (Chasing hot latinas vs chasing pretty  pinays.)  Maybe some guys are more attracted to Latinas, but they no longer have the energy for a more drama filled life.

My experience and opinion comes from lots of experience in Colombia (married and divorced after 10 years), and 2 trips to the Philippines with a couple of relationships.  I also lived in Colombia for a while, so I got the full exposure.

So I think for guys that are over 45, the Philippines are a better chance for long term success.  From what I can tell, Pinays are more likely to be satisfied long term with a life that has already been developed by their older husbands.  Often more mature guys are happy with their income, situation, and things won't be growing, and changing much throughout the marriage.  Also if the guy can give the girl a baby, or bring her child to the US, long term stability will be more likely.

In Colombia, I think the girls have more of an entrepreneur type of spirit, and often have many unreasonable goals and dreams in their minds that most often are in conflict with one another.  Like going to medical school, and raising a large family all at the same time.  They often don't have the education, or organizational skills to pull any of it off, but in their minds they are ready.  I think that Pinays are more satisfied with the thought of being able to help their family a bit in the future, and to have a happy home.  Living a more stagnant "already developed" life has the chance of boring a colombiana more then a Pinay in my opinion.

For younger guys chasing their own growing career with lots of energy to put into also helping their colombiana chase her dreams, I think that finding a nice Colombian girl works sometimes.  Over all, I think that long term marriage success is more likely with a pinay.  I don't have the statistics to back that up.  It's just my gut feeling.  On this board there are a few long term marriages to colombianas, but I think all of them are under 10 years.  My calena wife went from zero english, and just barely feeding herself in Cali, to being a RN managing an intensive care unit here in San Diego.  The amount of encouragement and support it took to help her make her dreams come true is incalculable.  She went through huge changes in her life in income and education, and her husband stayed the same guy she married.

So I think it comes down to age and energy level.  Marriages to colombianas are more risky, and the marriages will more likely take more energy long term to keep it together.

I think guys underestimate how devastating it is going to be to their lives if their marriage fails when they marry one of these girls.  Knowing what I know now, I don't think I would take that risk again, with a colombiana, but I might with a Pinay if I met someone special.

[AndyLee]

Wow, JWR, that´s a heck of a short story, I´d love to hear the long version someday. You have experienced a lot and came out of it still smiling and still open to another possible relationship. Good for you.
I can imagine that paying for and emotionally supporting your Latina to become what she is today, starting essentially from scratch, was a nail biter all the way, then to have it end in divorce is a huge disappointment.
One of my American friends is a professional and married a beautiful Latina from Medellin and brought her back to the States. Right off she was bored without her family and friends, and without a good handle on the language yet, so he helped her start a little side business. She hired a driver, a retired guy who earned peanuts for his time but he too was bored stiff and willing to do it.
He drove her around all the discount houses and factory outlets in New Jersey where she would buy up anything she thought she could resale in Medellin. Within two years she was paying a girl to deliver the items to Medellin and her friends there were reselling, and the girl was bringing back between $5,000 and $10,000 USD each trip for my friend´s wife. Money she did not share with him, putting it all in her new account at Chase.
At the 2.5 year mark she kicked my friend out of HIS house, filed for divorce, and told her attorney to delay the divorce until the day after her 3 year green card wait was over. Of course my friend was devastated. Fortunately there were no kids involved, and he lived in a no fault divorce state, so he walked away only losing half his assets and not having to pay child support or alimony. Sad story, somewhat similar to yours.

[benjio]

I've heard more horror stories like these two than I care to remember. Especially when it comes to girls from Medellin. And although I constantly reiterate there are plenty of great girls in Colombia, I still wouldn't ever bring one to the states and try to maintain a marriage here. It's like I've always said: To take a woman out of the environment that made her who she is and in turn made you fall for her, then expect her not to change (usually for the worst) is pure insanity. Now that I think about it I'd probably be much more likely to bring a Filipina here. So I guess there is some difference.

[AndyLee]

I've heard more horror stories like these two than I care to remember. Especially when it comes to girls from Medellin. And although I constantly reiterate there are plenty of great girls in Colombia, I still wouldn't ever bring one to the states and try to maintain a marriage here. It's like I've always said: To take a woman out of the environment that made her who she is and in turn made you fall for her, then expect her not to change (usually for the worst) is pure insanity. Now that I think about it I'd probably be much more likely to bring a Filipina here. So I guess there is some difference.

Definitely agree, it is rare that a gringo takes a Latina to US and she doesn´t change. I´m always curious how guys like Fathertime and some of the others have managed to maintain equilibrium when faced with it.
Some of the other changes my friend´s ex-wife went through involved her weight and consequently her attitude towards sex. She fell in love with two extremes, fast food and high priced restaurants. After 6 months in country she had packed on about 30 pounds and lost interest in sex because she couldn´t orgasm anymore, and blamed it on him. As my friend complained, she went from being border line nympho so common to many latinas, to being a typical gringa worried about her hairdo getting mussed during sex.
I think my ideal Latina would be one who wants to live in Colombia, doesn´t have kids and isn´t climbing the walls to get pregnant, wants to visit US but only for a little bit, and is willing to work at least part time to pay some portion of our expenses so I don´t get left feeling like I´m the sugar daddy. jajajajaja, impossible, right?

[vikingo]

Little that I know about Filipinas I have a feeling that supporting her family is the foremost thing on her mind and she therefore is more agreeable to stick it out in the US in comparison to many a colombiana who is torn back and forth trying to keep her marriage to the gringo intact and just giving it all up to be back with her family and friends she grew up with.
 Not wanting to change the subject but has anyone ever considered Venezuela as an ideal place to find a good woman? An article in today’s news said 73% of families live in poverty now and since June of this year the official exchange rate for tourists is 200 bolivars to the US dollar which isn't half bad and there is also a very advantageous black-market exchange but don't know the risk involved going that route.
US citizens require a visitor visa though but retirees with a US$1200 pension can get permanent residency.



 

[mambocowboy]

This is a 50,000 word subject that I'm going to attempt to shrink.

I think getting married is a big crap shoot with not the best odds for long term happiness, sex, and success.  If you take this premise into consideration from the beginning, you have to then ask yourself is it worth compromising some things to increase the chance for success.  (Chasing hot latinas vs chasing pretty  pinays.)  Maybe some guys are more attracted to Latinas, but they no longer have the energy for a more drama filled life.

My experience and opinion comes from lots of experience in Colombia (married and divorced after 10 years), and 2 trips to the Philippines with a couple of relationships.  I also lived in Colombia for a while, so I got the full exposure.

So I think for guys that are over 45, the Philippines are a better chance for long term success.  From what I can tell, Pinays are more likely to be satisfied long term with a life that has already been developed by their older husbands.  Often more mature guys are happy with their income, situation, and things won't be growing, and changing much throughout the marriage.  Also if the guy can give the girl a baby, or bring her child to the US, long term stability will be more likely.

In Colombia, I think the girls have more of an entrepreneur type of spirit, and often have many unreasonable goals and dreams in their minds that most often are in conflict with one another.  Like going to medical school, and raising a large family all at the same time.  They often don't have the education, or organizational skills to pull any of it off, but in their minds they are ready.  I think that Pinays are more satisfied with the thought of being able to help their family a bit in the future, and to have a happy home.  Living a more stagnant "already developed" life has the chance of boring a colombiana more then a Pinay in my opinion.

For younger guys chasing their own growing career with lots of energy to put into also helping their colombiana chase her dreams, I think that finding a nice Colombian girl works sometimes.  Over all, I think that long term marriage success is more likely with a pinay.  I don't have the statistics to back that up.  It's just my gut feeling.  On this board there are a few long term marriages to colombianas, but I think all of them are under 10 years.  My calena wife went from zero english, and just barely feeding herself in Cali, to being a RN managing an intensive care unit here in San Diego.  The amount of encouragement and support it took to help her make her dreams come true is incalculable.  She went through huge changes in her life in income and education, and her husband stayed the same guy she married.

So I think it comes down to age and energy level.  Marriages to colombianas are more risky, and the marriages will more likely take more energy long term to keep it together.

I think guys underestimate how devastating it is going to be to their lives if their marriage fails when they marry one of these girls.  Knowing what I know now, I don't think I would take that risk again, with a colombiana, but I might with a Pinay if I met someone special.

Before I got married I felt I had nothing to lose. Now I  have a house a wife and two daughters. So I now do have alot to lose..

[AndyLee]

Not wanting to change the subject but has anyone ever considered Venezuela as an ideal place to find a good woman? An article in today’s news said 73% of families live in poverty now and since June of this year the official exchange rate for tourists is 200 bolivars to the US dollar which isn't half bad and there is also a very advantageous black-market exchange but don't know the risk involved going that route.
US citizens require a visitor visa though but retirees with a US$1200 pension can get permanent residency.

Not a change of subject at all, and thanks for bringing up Venezuela. A couple years ago when I wanted to visit Venezuela I looked at stats and something like seven of the previous Miss Universe had come from there, and when I look on the cupid sites I see a lot of pretty women. The Venezuelan women I have met here in Colombia seem very similar to Colombianas.
The risk of course is the unstable government which is very unfriendly to Americans. If you should get caught messing around with money exchange on the black market you could wind up being a political prisoner. The border is closed, so you would have to fly, and tickets are very expensive and very iffy. I met a gal in Bogota last week who paid $1800 for round trip from Caracas to Bogota.
It is likely that the alleged socialist government of Madero will be voted out this go round, which could lead to a recall vote for him. If that happens and a stable government takes control then I would definitely consider going there.

[Elexpatriado]

when I was living and working  in  Venezuela in  2009 evertbody had bank accounts in Florida and played the Black Market..including and espescially the Chavistas.

Still way, way too much violence and instabllity. The quality of life is way below that in  Colombia.

.

Not a change of subject at all, and thanks for bringing up Venezuela. A couple years ago when I wanted to visit Venezuela I looked at stats and something like seven of the previous Miss Universe had come from there, and when I look on the cupid sites I see a lot of pretty women. The Venezuelan women I have met here in Colombia seem very similar to Colombianas.
The risk of course is the unstable government which is very unfriendly to Americans. If you should get caught messing around with money exchange on the black market you could wind up being a political prisoner. The border is closed, so you would have to fly, and tickets are very expensive and very iffy. I met a gal in Bogota last week who paid $1800 for round trip from Caracas to Bogota.
It is likely that the alleged socialist government of Madero will be voted out this go round, which could lead to a recall vote for him. If that happens and a stable government takes control then I would definitely consider going there.

[buencamino]

LOL

Scoff if you want Expletive but some guys married to Phillipinas may be in for a rude awakening!

[AndyLee]

Please don´t misunderstand me, I do not mean anyone any harm. I believe in free speech and the golden rule. Common courtesy and a pleasant smile will get you far farther than throwing gasoline on a flame.
Ray has as much right to speak here as anyone. I do too.
In the interest of a peace offering here is a free download of Dale Carnegie´s book How To Win Friends and Influence People
http://www.yourcoach.be/blog/wp-content/uploads/2014/02/Dale-Carnegie-How-to-win-friends-and-influence-people.pdf

[robert angel]

Well said Ray and speaking of politics I wonder what you know about reports that in recent years Philipinas who are members of the Partido Komunista ng Pilipinas or (PKP) Philippine Communist Party have married unsuspecting American men in order to gain ingress to the United States with the ultimate goal of establishing clandestine cadres in western states. You purport to be married to one so you may have some inside scoop on this.

Source/s?

[JWR]

Here's a refresher on using a good feature of this website.


How to add someone to your ignore list.


Click on.
Profile
Account settings
Buddies / ignore list
Edit ignore list
Add the member you're tired of to your ignore list.

[AndyLee]

Here's a refresher on using a good feature of this website.


How to add someone to your ignore list.


Click on.

Profile
Account settings
Buddies / ignore list
Edit ignore list

Add the member you're tired of to your ignore list.

Wow, that´s so easy. Muchas gracias

[AndyLee]

jajajajaja, that´s fantastic......now, after putting el idioto on my ignore list, all I see is his signature when he posts, nothing else. Wow, what a breath of fresh air. Thanks!!!!

[Elexpatriado]

Putting people on ignore list has the same disadvantages as closing your eyes during a horror movies..You hear everyone else screaming, and you just have to open your eyes and take a peak every now and then..

[robert angel]

Yes we have the right to speak our minds--our opinions here. This forum even encourages 'spirited discourse'. But I don't think it encourages or should even allow people who are consistently over the top nasty, potty mouthed, demented, resorting repeatedly to the same old insults etc.


Just because I disagree with someone--and there's plenty of posts here that make me roll my eyes and sometimes even want to grit my teeth, but it's fairly uncommon that I really lash out at those memberS.

On the other hand, if someone posts something remotely liberal, or slightly to the left here, before it even happens, we're expecting a barrage of insanely over the top and largely inappropriate responses, full of name calling and worse, which only serve to undermine the response/s making any credible point actually.

But that's not unusual from people who have so little self control or other mental defects to the point where 'knee jerk' reactions are their common mode of responding.
 
It's not about whether or not we can speak our opinion and again even in a spirited manner. I think the question is  whether we should be allowing people who do so in extremely personal, rude and offensive ways to continue to do so. I think some folks think other's vitriol is limited to just a few other members, but I think that some people here seem to over time, find reason to attack and/or offend just about every member here.

And persons of that ilk rarely get better--it's usually an unfortunate, integral part of their personality that they're unable to control.