Give me a quick rundown on the whole asian thing.

[Ray]

It cracks me up that they all have very Spanish names like Ramona Garcia yet they can't speak a word of Spanish.

I used to wonder about that also.

The Filipinos actually had no surnames (last names) when the Spaniards arrived. Being rather anal about keeping public records, the Spaniards assigned Spanish surnames to Filipinos so that they could better administer their bureaucratic government. Interestingly, surnames were assigned alphabetically by region, which explains why so many families in one area may have Spanish last names starting with the same letter.

Also, those Spanish surnames, and many place names, often contain letters that were non-existent in the native Tagalog language (C, F, J, Q, V, Z). This fact also explains why common words to both Tagalog and Spanish are often spelled differently. For example, cervesa becomes serbesa in Filipino...


Ray

[Gato4Astrid]

  The first time we ate together she literally hand fed me and wiped my mouth with a napkin like a servant or something.  I couldn't believe it.

Feeling like Eddie Murphy in "Coming America"  when the girls says  "Your royal penis is clean"   LOL

[kai #2]

not to troll but I thought you were deaf, how did you "hear" them say anything?

Feeling like Eddie Murphy in "Coming America"  when the girls says  "Your royal penis is clean"   LOL

[Gato4Astrid]

not to troll but I thought you were deaf, how did you "hear" them say anything?

EVER HEARD OF SUBTITLES  ?!!!!

[kai #2]

No reason to get uptight, just really curious.

EVER HEARD OF SUBTITLES  ?!!!!

[robert angel]

EVER HEARD OF SUBTITLES  ?!!!!

Gato--not so loudly, OK?!

[kai #2]

Loudest. deaf. person. ever

Gato--not so loudly, OK?!

[utopiacowboy]

I used to wonder about that also.

The Filipinos actually had no surnames (last names) when the Spaniards arrived. Being rather anal about keeping public records, the Spaniards assigned Spanish surnames to Filipinos so that they could better administer their bureaucratic government. Interestingly, surnames were assigned alphabetically by region, which explains why so many families in one area may have Spanish last names starting with the same letter.

Also, those Spanish surnames, and many place names, often contain letters that were non-existent in the native Tagalog language (C, F, J, Q, V, Z). This fact also explains why common words to both Tagalog and Spanish are often spelled differently. For example, cervesa becomes serbesa in Filipino...


Ray

So it's completely random? I would have thought that their surnames would have reflected a Spanish ancestor but in fact, our Ramona Garcia may not have a drop of Spanish blood?

[Ray]

So it's completely random? I would have thought that their surnames would have reflected a Spanish ancestor but in fact, our Ramona Garcia may not have a drop of Spanish blood?

Correct...

[Bob_S]

Awesome, based on some of your previous posts, you might not have a temperament to match an Asian lady.  However as Gavin showed, you might look into ethnic Asian South American ladies from Peru or Brazil.  What you see as submissive is not subservient but rather submitting to a role with expectations of duty.  But the man has duties as well he is expected to submit to.  And depending on the guy, that can be peaceful and satisfying knowing you are part of a team where the left hand and right hand work in concert.  But if you are more familiar with the passionate give and take of a latina, the requirements of a traditional Asian spouse can seem boring and get old quick.  So a nisei from South America who grew up with that bi-cultural influence might be just what you're looking for.

[Awesome]

Awesome, based on some of your previous posts, you might not have a temperament to match an Asian lady.  However as Gavin showed, you might look into ethnic Asian South American ladies from Peru or Brazil.  What you see as submissive is not subservient but rather submitting to a role with expectations of duty.  But the man has duties as well he is expected to submit to.  And depending on the guy, that can be peaceful and satisfying knowing you are part of a team where the left hand and right hand work in concert.  But if you are more familiar with the passionate give and take of a latina, the requirements of a traditional Asian spouse can seem boring and get old quick.  So a nisei from South America who grew up with that bi-cultural influence might be just what you're looking for.

Hmm, I never thought of it that way.  When I go to my laotian buddies' parents' house their mother doesn't seem very submissive at all.  She's a feisty old woman, and the husband is a very soft spoken type.  Of course they do seem to be very much in tune with each other since I've never seen them argue or disagree about anything.


What I'm looking for when I say "submissive" is that old fashioned sense that the man is always right and what the man says is what goes, no questions asked.  My aunts tell me how when they were young my grandfather would come and go as he pleased.  He would go out partying with his buddies and sometimes stay gone the whole weekend while my grandmother dutifully stayed home with the kids and she never questioned him or tried to limit his freedom(that I know of).  My grandfather was always a very hard worker and a good provider but he was known to be a hard partier and womanizer.  It seems like these days it's hard to find an old fashioned woman who's willing to live like that and completely submit to her husbands will.  Even the latinas I know aren't going to allow her husband to do whatever he wants while she stays home.  I'm wondering if I can find that with an asian woman.

[fathertime]

Hmm, I never thought of it that way.  When I go to my laotian buddies' parents' house their mother doesn't seem very submissive at all.  She's a feisty old woman, and the husband is a very soft spoken type.  Of course they do seem to be very much in tune with each other since I've never seen them argue or disagree about anything.


What I'm looking for when I say "submissive" is that old fashioned sense that the man is always right and what the man says is what goes, no questions asked.  My aunts tell me how when they were young my grandfather would come and go as he pleased.  He would go out partying with his buddies and sometimes stay gone the whole weekend while my grandmother dutifully stayed home with the kids and she never questioned him or tried to limit his freedom(that I know of).  My grandfather was always a very hard worker and a good provider but he was known to be a hard partier and womanizer.  It seems like these days it's hard to find an old fashioned woman who's willing to live like that and completely submit to her husbands will.  Even the latinas I know aren't going to allow her husband to do whatever he wants while she stays home.  I'm wondering if I can find that with an asian woman.

Hehe, I don't know if you half joking or not....but I'm pretty sure you can find that with a latin woman....of course you don't have to say 'I'm looking for a woman that will ignore my infidelities"....you can just behave that way around her, while still providing for her, and if she sticks and pumps out kids (perhaps prior to marriage)...then you know you are probably good!


Fathertime!   

[Awesome]

Hehe, I don't know if you half joking or not....but I'm pretty sure you can find that with a latin woman....of course you don't have to say 'I'm looking for a woman that will ignore my infidelities"....you can just behave that way around her, while still providing for her, and if she sticks and pumps out kids (perhaps prior to marriage)...then you know you are probably good!


Fathertime!

You're right.  I could definitely get some simple, old fashioned girl probably from some small town out in the country who's programmed to cook, clean, have babies, and obey.  But I'd also like a wife who's college educated so I don't know if it's possible to have both with a latina.  Maybe an asian wife could be like that?  Or maybe I should convert to islam, I don't know.  Lol!  I'll probably just end up like expat and calipro, an older guy wandering around still trying to figure out women and still trying to figure out exactly what it is I actually want.  I'm getting dangerously close to that since I'm definitely not young anymore.  Oh well I'm headed out to do a little bar hopping and see if I can get into some trouble.  I think this is going to be my conversation topic for the night.  "How and where do I find an old fashion submissive woman to marry"?  I'm sure the gringas at the bar are going to love talking about that lol!!

[robert angel]

Hmm, I never thought of it that way.  When I go to my laotian buddies' parents' house their mother doesn't seem very submissive at all.  She's a feisty old woman, and the husband is a very soft spoken type.  Of course they do seem to be very much in tune with each other since I've never seen them argue or disagree about anything.


What I'm looking for when I say "submissive" is that old fashioned sense that the man is always right and what the man says is what goes, no questions asked. My aunts tell me how when they were young my grandfather would come and go as he pleased.  He would go out partying with his buddies and sometimes stay gone the whole weekend while my grandmother dutifully stayed home with the kids and she never questioned him or tried to limit his freedom(that I know of).  My grandfather was always a very hard worker and a good provider but he was known to be a hard partier and womanizer.  It seems like these days it's hard to find an old fashioned woman who's willing to live like that and completely submit to her husbands will.  Even the latinas I know aren't going to allow her husband to do whatever he wants while she stays home.  I'm wondering if I can find that with an asian woman.

I think you're confusing 'submissive' with blind obedience under all but the most extreme situations. A so called 'submissive' Asian wife, in the most typical and dare I say 'good' sense, is not remotely dumb, stupid or willing to follow you blindly. She probably won't 'call you out' in public when you do something dumb, but you will probably hear about it in private.

Happened to me tonight in fact. My son works at a movie theater and we get in free. He told us what theater "The Imitation Game" (good flick) was playing in, then asked me if either of us I wanted a free soda. I said 'no thanks', then a few minutes later, changed my mind and I also wanted to invite him to friend's B Day party tomorrow night. But by then, there were 15 paying customers in line--but stop me? Heck no!

Anyway, w/o letting anyone know, but still laser communicating to me, she made it very clear--as well as again in the privacy of the theatre, that he was 'working' and it was best to leave him to attend to paying customers. She felt it was bad form and made him look bad as a worker.

A good 'submissive' Asian wife won't sweat the little things that stinky, ill mannered guys often do around the house, but she'll expect her man to look good and be sharp in public.

999,998 times out of 1000,000, before she goes anywhere outside the house, she asks me for 'permission'. I think twice I got her mad as hell and she went to the library w/o 'asking' me---but we regrouped pretty fast. It's generally a forgone conclusion I'll say "yes" but if I say "no" --typically declining to go to a party or outside event, maybe a meal, that's 'it'. Nada problemo. But if I were drunk and/or crazy and locked her in the house and stood in front of the door, she'd probably throw a chair through the window and hop out.

There are some occasions, uncommon but they do happen, where I'll not want something and usually over time, she'll imperceptibly change the situation to where it just happens to work out her way.  Took a number or years, but I guess that's why we have wood floors now. She didn't whine or nag and the carpet wasn't that bad, but eventually she got her way. I think when she said if we could do the floors, she wanted nothing for Christmas or her b day, that was the clincher. Have to admit, it looks a lot better and she kept it well within the budget. But she never wants something just because 'they' have it.

But if I was making stupid, irrational judgments, if I couldn't lead and take care of the house, she'd either do it herself, or get rid of me and move on. She doesn't think she could--she sometimes thinks if I died tomorrow that things like mortgages, insurances, taxes etc. are beyond her, but I am totally positive she'd figure things out and probably handle them better than I do. She pretty much always under estimates herself, then always does well at whatever she has to handle, because she expects a challenge. She's proud as all get out about the Philippines and Filipinos, but very modest and humble as an individual. Know that corny country song "She don't know she's beautiful"? That's her. But inside, she knows I've done well having her as a wife and once in a blue moon when I've irked her more than usual, she'll remind me.

We're going out of town to a party Sunday, but she won't miss seeing Ms. Philippines (who went to a University close to hers in Mindanao) in Sunday night's Ms. Universe pageant for anything. She's all about the greater glory, be it in nation, family or group.

I think a lot of the above, if I haven't put you to sleep already, are characteristics you'll see in a better, 'traditional' Filipina.

BTW, Laos is a very small nation. They are famous for being loyal to those they side with and if you can find a good Laotian lady, you may be onto a very good thing.

[Bob_S]

What I'm looking for when I say "submissive" is that old fashioned sense that the man is always right and what the man says is what goes, no questions asked. ...  It seems like these days it's hard to find an old fashioned woman who's willing to live like that and completely submit to her husbands will.  Even the latinas I know aren't going to allow her husband to do whatever he wants while she stays home.  I'm wondering if I can find that with an asian woman.

Not if you're looking to import.  You can probably get away with that if you are willing to move to her country.  But moving to another country, even for the woman coming here, involves a lot of new crappola you have to learn how to deal with, and a woman willing to do that has to have a certain amount of ambition, go-get-it-iveness, and some self respect, and won't be quite so willing to put up with that from a husband.  A woman willing to endure that kind of role is someone who would never really consider relocating.  You may find one willing to fake it fo a while, but as soon as she has her greencard, she'll be history.  And if you're lucky she'll just sneak out during the day while you're at work.  If you're not so lucky, you'll find yourself in cuffs held down by the po-po while she cries fake tears while she recounts made-up accusations of abuse you did to her.

[robert angel]

Not if you're looking to import.  You can probably get away with that if you are willing to move to her country.  But moving to another country, even for the woman coming here, involves a lot of new crappola you have to learn how to deal with, and a woman willing to do that has to have a certain amount of ambition, go-get-it-iveness, and some self respect, and won't be quite so willing to put up with that from a husband.  A woman willing to endure that kind of role is someone who would never really consider relocating.  You may find one willing to fake it fo a while, but as soon as she has her greencard, she'll be history.  And if you're lucky she'll just sneak out during the day while you're at work.  If you're not so lucky, you'll find yourself in cuffs held down by the po-po while she cries fake tears while she recounts made-up accusations of abuse you did to her.

Hard to apply such a broad generalization to Asia. In the Philippines, there's millions of Filipinas, many with children, who left their husbands--or their husbands left them. But in any case, there is no divorce in the Philippines, an annulment's no sure bet, it costs more than many USA divorces and the stigma that might result from marital separation in one Asian nation can be quite different than how it is in another.

It's such a long (often over seven years), uncertain and expensive process involving the church and govt., that many Filipinas who get pregnant don't get married and some women even choose to have children out of wedlock.

Over the years, I've known a few financially successful, career minded Filipinas who had children outside of marriage by plan and w/o wanting any ties from the sperm donor.

[Fosgate5]

I don't know that any asian woman will let you disappear for days on a drinking binge and do whatever you want and still expect them to worship the ground you walk on. If you want a woman like that I think you had better be prepared for the day you discover someone else keeping your bed warm in your absence. Some of the things Robert advised me of earlier I am discovering true. If you want them to worship you, you had better get your stuff together and be a man they expect as well. What I am saying is with Filipina's you simply do not have female friends. So say good bye to your old female co worker friends, exes etc. Next, drinking and gambling. Yeah, getting drunk by many is heavily frowned upon ( I found this odd to exist in German culture as well). Gambling, big no no. Porn? Forget about it, better go back to jerking it to National Geographic if you need to.


I had a friend that shared this video clip on FB and I think this woman describes a vast majority of Women who are single at my age in the U.S. Or at least my ex fiance and every woman I have ever dated since. I think she describes herself and what the sex roles we desire from our women and those type of women look for in men. Problem is it seems after you get to be a certain age, those old fashion type are married and the women she describes is what's left. Also it seems more and more women have that feminist belief. Maybe that's why our divorce rate is at 50%? But as someone implied about the woman claiming abuse. Women back here at home do that all the time once they figure out they can just play victim to get their way. Ever notice it's always the guys fault for the breakup when you ask a woman?


https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QRTH3uHz2_0


With that said, if you find yourself an old fashion woman, be an old fashion masculine man who protects his woman and works for her and not himself and she will be your queen who looks out for her king.

[Jhengsman]

Hard to apply such a broad generalization to Asia. In the Philippines, there's millions of Filipinas, many with children, who left their husbands--or their husbands left them. But in any case, there is no divorce in the Philippines, an annulment's no sure bet, it costs more than many USA divorces and the stigma that might result from marital separation in one Asian nation can be quite different than how it is in another.

It's such a long (often over seven years), uncertain and expensive process involving the church and govt., that many Filipinas who get pregnant don't get married and some women even choose to have children out of wedlock.

Over the years, I've known a few financially successful, career minded Filipinas who had children outside of marriage by plan and w/o wanting any ties from the sperm donor.

Some? The single parenthood rate in the Philippines is at about 37% compared to 41% in the United States

[robert angel]

Some? The single parenthood rate in the Philippines is at about 37% compared to 41% in the United States

So much has changed pretty much worldwide in the last ten years or so--and certainly also in the Philippines. But I think that women are having babies out of wedlock increasingly for various reasons and in varying degrees within those reason categories, depending on the country, the culture and even according to location within the country.

It's a lot different to have a baby out of wedlock in Manila than in a small, remote barangay. In the Manila area, thought by many to be the most densely populated city on earth, having over twenty million people in and around the Manila/Rizal area, it's a lot different to have a child out of wedlock than say, in a remote barangay of maybe a 100 people.

Take into account 7000 + islands and there's a lot of diversity. Certainly there are also a lot of rather young women in remote areas who come up pregnant and an abortion isn't even a consideration. I think in those cases/areas, the pressure to marry the father is higher.

In more developed nations and areas where women have more economic freedom, having a baby by choice while single might be more plausible and as said, we're even seeing more of that in the Philippines. In Scandinavian countries, marriage as we know it is almost a dead institution and that mindset is spreading. I'd dare say that the trend against getting married but living together and having babies with or w/o a non married (the father) partner's involvement is pretty much worldwide.

Things are changing world wide and I don't think people even (at least not verbally and publically) refer to children born out of wedlock as 'bastards' much anymore, Thank God!