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Author Topic: SENDING MONEY CREATES A MONSTER  (Read 43691 times)

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Offline Awesome

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Re: SENDING MONEY CREATES A MONSTER
« Reply #200 on: February 17, 2014, 06:41:55 AM »

I'm getting the impression a lot of guys here are ready and willing to give most Colombianas the benefit of the doubt and feel sorry for the the people I've done these things to. I give everyone a chance, but don't cross me. Make no mistake gentleman, these people will eat you alive. Back to Buencamino's comment...If I wanted to get revenge on someone in Colombia there are people I know. And I can assure you it would be much worse than making a blank trip to Western Union or being left with a restaurant bill. I for one don't feel bad for people when they try to screw someone else over and it backfires.


Damn, I can only imagine what you've been through if you've gotten to the point where "there are people that I know".  My one concern I would have would be if I got into it with some colombian and I did something to him, how would I know who is going to be pissed enough to come for revenge?  Or how would I see them coming?  I'd feel like a sitting duck.  Yea you could leave town, but when you come back you'll be looking over your shoulder.  How would you know who you can trust?  Yea I have some gringo buddies in colombia but those jokers wouldn't bust a grape in a fruit fight.

Offline Elexpatriado

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Re: SENDING MONEY CREATES A MONSTER
« Reply #201 on: February 17, 2014, 07:45:52 AM »
What you say below- your list of "Dos and Don'ts" is pretty common sense, and what most guys follow..it is pretty common sense.. but if they refuse taxi fare or pay for thier own meals or buy some little thing for me  occaisionly..they get extra points right off the bat , and I give them a wink, an OK single with my hand or tap on the Shoulder and say "Muy Bueno".. My Bro MUDD says thats not good though, because I am expressing my pleasure too easily and inavertadly letting the girl kow I date a LOT of girls... ;D  oh well.. I'll get the "Jason Bourne mysterious guy" down Pat someday...still praticing..

That's an excellent point BCC, not sure how they learn those rules to be honest.


It got me thinking though. What do we determine is ok and when does it appear it is crossing the line?


I make probably 15-20x times what my girl makes as income, so I pay for our dates, meals and drinks…. I also pay for all taxi's.


I even paid for her passport and visa, but there is no way she could pay for these. She's not poor, but she also doesn't have that type of available funds to pay for these type of expenses.


I pay for all the dates I go on here in the US too? so why should that be any different for someone in her position really?…To BCC's astute point, how will she know what to accept and what becomes a liberty.


Now if she called me to pay her rent, brought her friends out to our dinners or asked me to go shopping with her so she could point things out---then I'd start to maybe second guess her intentions.


I think it's different for everyone and really you have to look at the whole picture to determine how your viewed to her? a true partner or ATM?


Where's the line?

Offline Elexpatriado

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Re: SENDING MONEY CREATES A MONSTER
« Reply #202 on: February 17, 2014, 07:53:24 AM »
What you do in that case, is what a freind of mine did. You order the most expensive thing yourself..eat it, when your done excuse yourself and go to the bathroom.. tell the waiter in the back room you did not intend to pay the food of the girls and if he interpereted you would it's his problem, give him te money for your part  (plus 10% tip) or leave it on the table and take off before they know whatis happening..Colombian "Comer y Correr"..
In addition to what DRGUY1 has written......

When I had with my 1st novia (Bogota), she brought her friend without my knowledge, and they walked in a rather expensive restaurant.  They sat down on the table, assuming I approved the menu !!!  (WTF).

I ordered main menu, but my novia told the waiter what we were having.  I had no idea what they wanted.   Starter course (soup) came in for these 2 girls.   I told her I did not realise that they were having a starter too.   Her replied was "You never asked"      I thought she was really rude because I am the one who is going to pay for the food!    They did not finish the starter and also did not even eat half of the main dinner!

Back at home, they do not eat food very much, but with me, they ordered as much as possible - like a week worth of food!

That was the line that they really crossed!  She did not bother to consult me or asked if I were hungry.  I was a goddamn ATM !!

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Re: SENDING MONEY CREATES A MONSTER
« Reply #202 on: February 17, 2014, 07:53:24 AM »

Offline Elexpatriado

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Re: A Simple Solution to ATM Syndrome?
« Reply #203 on: February 17, 2014, 08:02:57 AM »
He..he.. won't work in my case..I have a stupendous "Burn Rate" thier gonna think their with Warren Buffet in the first day..I am relally burning up my meagre "Pizza Hut" pension quickly...
 
I don't think you need to go through this type of effort to see how responsile ad practical she is..
 
Eventually thier gonna find out how much you make.. plus or minus..the ones that are responsible and not gold diggers will not take advantage of you.. and I won't be a Tacano and am really generous if I feel the Gal really cares for me..
I hear these stories all the time here about how some young lady made them feel like an ATM machine while they went all the way over there to visit her. Or how she brought along her uninvited friends for a dinner date and ordered up all the most expensive stuff on the menu.
 
There is a simple way to avoid all the ill feelings, embarrassing confrontations, and at the same time put the lady’s financial skills to the test so you can see first hand how she respects your money and is able to budget funds.
 
Assuming that you have already been corresponding/communicating with her before your visit, and you feel reasonably sure that she is genuine and a possible candidate for marriage, try turning over to her your allowed budget for the entire time of the visit on the first day of your arrival.
 
You should have a good idea how much you expect to spend, or can afford to spend, during your visit. Bring that amount in cash and tell her that you would like to let her hold your money for you and pay for all of your expenses during your stay, with the exception of your hotel bills which you can handle with a credit card.
 
Tell her explicitly that this is all you have to spend for your trip and when that is gone, there isn’t any more money. If she spends it all in a very short time, tell her you have to go home now because you are broke.
 
This will serve the dual purpose of showing that you trust her while allowing you to observe first hand how she handles money. Let her pay for everything…meals, transportation, sight seeing, souvenirs to take home, tips, everything. Let her pick the restaurants/clubs/entertainment, whatever. Let her do most all of the ordering for food and drinks also.
 
This tactic will take all that budgeting pressure off of you and put the responsibility squarely on her shoulders. She will more than likely gladly accept the responsibility and want to show you how she can handle things.
 
What if she blows all of your money in a couple of days, or worse, runs out on you and disappears with your money? Isn’t a few hundred or a thousand dollars or whatever well worth it if you find out before you get serious or marry her and then later learn the hard way that she only thinks of you as an ATM machine?
 
I have used this tactic when visiting or dating foreign women whom I barely knew and I have never been ripped off. I know friends and co-workers who have used this method also and were pleasantly surprised at the results. Let her show her responsibility and respect for your money, or lack thereof. She should never be told that this is any kind of test, only that you are afraid of being robbed, or that you don’t know how to bargain prices in her country, or anything along those lines.
 
You can tell her what type of activities you would prefer, or what kind of shopping you would like to do for souvenirs, etc., but let her make most all of the decisions on how much to spend and where to spend it. If there is money left over after your visit/date, then you can decide if you want to keep what she has left over, or let her have it for herself.
 
And don’t be surprised if she opts for some home cooked meals instead of eating out at expensive restaurants every day. Or suggesting a short walk instead of a taxi ride.
 
Of course, just in case, I would recommend keeping a hundred or two in your shoe so that you can still have a little fun on your own if she does split on you...  ;D
 
 
Give it some thought…
 
Ray

Offline Elexpatriado

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Re: SENDING MONEY CREATES A MONSTER
« Reply #204 on: February 17, 2014, 08:08:04 AM »
 
I think it is little to do with age and more todo with disposable income. Very, very, very few women making more than 50% of awell-healed 55 yo expats income in Colombia , Honduras, Phillipines, or even Mexico, no matter what age. But in Calgary or Houston, would find plenty of 50 yo female professionals or executives..but still relative small proportion of the population.
I think the line is whatever two people from different cultures agree on. If the relationship is fun and the sex is good maybe have that frank conversation. The guys I've talked to over the years that are living overseas are rarely interested in settling down. Most of the time they are out playing the field. I just don't see the point of a guy getting all bent out of shape if his much younger girlfriend decides to test the boundaries of the relationship. Unless you are dense you already know that you relationship is based partly on finances. Ideally she cares about you, but at the same time the only way she knows the boundaries is for you to set them. Imagine going from barely scraping by to nice things... I'd say if she is fun to date and the sex is great then why don't you give her a chance to understand the rules of the "game" you wish to play by. Then she can chose if she'd like to partake or not.

But for that 50 plus gringo wanting the 20 year old... it's time to smell the coffee. If you want a relationship without the financial aspect maybe date a girl born in the early 80s instead of the mid 90s.

Offline Elexpatriado

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Re: SENDING MONEY CREATES A MONSTER
« Reply #205 on: February 17, 2014, 08:15:04 AM »
 
Those guys are just as guilty- they encourage the gals to Coger Papaya from the Gringo and order the most expensive thing so they get a bigger tip. I seen it just recently in Bogota (with 1 gal only of courese). Course I didnt leave , and I still gave him the tip, but I lectured him when she was in the can,next time a Gringo or extranjero was there with a local Gal DON'T encourage her to buy the most expensive thing--Guevones!! Don't knowif i helps, but if they getthe idea they are pissing the guy off and may lose thier tip, maybe they'll be more reasonable next time.
 
But your right ACE- takes mor Balls and is really the right thing to do just to walk out prior to anything being purchased. ;D
Quote from: Awesome link=topic=7722.msg11 on the menu3840#msg113840 date=1392630360

This is hard to believe.  If you did actually do that, you do realize that somebody had to pay that bill?  Most likely the mesero was out a whole week's pay.

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Re: A Simple Solution to ATM Syndrome?
« Reply #206 on: February 17, 2014, 08:19:10 AM »
And don’t be surprised if she opts for some home cooked meals instead of eating out at expensive restaurants every day. Or suggesting a short walk instead of a taxi ride.


I tried to tell that to my 1st Colombian girlfriend, but she ignored


We wanted to go to an historical site about 2 hours away.  I wanted to go by bus  ($10 each) but she refused to go on bus claiming it is too dangerous.  She wanted to be on taxi.   It costs me $200.  The taxi driver and her kept talking to each other in whole trip.   I don't remember paying the taxi drive for chatting!   She said I must pay the taxi driver extra for lunch.  So it is $200 plus lunch !!!


She lead a very lazy life, expecting luxury life!  She had never cooked home meal even when we stayed at an apartment.  She phoned up and order take away - every day!






When I had my ex-Romanian girl staying at my home for a month 12 years ago.  She complaint that ot was too far for her to walk to the shopping centre which is only 5 minutes walk away.  We had to hop in a bus to get there.    In Romania she walked 45 minutes every day to go to work and also another 45 minutes to get back home!

Offline Elexpatriado

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Re: SENDING MONEY CREATES A MONSTER
« Reply #207 on: February 17, 2014, 08:33:41 AM »
The best revenge is to go on living. Usually, if you know someone who knows some Sicarios who will drive by and Knee-cap someone, you can't trust them either, and they will end up extorting money off of you by threatening to go to the police, DAS, DIAN or YOUR EMPLOYER (think about that Benjio!!) and tell them you tried too hire a sicario.
 
Even the more subtle forms of revenge involving the internet (as I described in earlier post) and ordering pizzas to the house at 1:00AM every night, advertising in the local paper free food for the homeless at yur nemesisi address, are not worth the effort. If you get in a situation where you get taken advantage of, it is mostly your fault anyway, and is a "lesson Learned"- beleive me I know myself. And what happens with this is what "Goes around Comes around"and the person that deceived and used you ends up self-destructing themselves.
 
However, I agree that it is not a bad thing to reward bad behavor with bad behavior, and anything goes when they bring family and freinds without money to a restaurant or bar or try to scam money off of you. Maybe you can put a little "class" into them that thier parents never instilled.
 

Damn, I can only imagine what you've been through if you've gotten to the point where "there are people that I know".  My one concern I would have would be if I got into it with some colombian and I did something to him, how would I know who is going to be pissed enough to come for revenge?  Or how would I see them coming?  I'd feel like a sitting duck.  Yea you could leave town, but when you come back you'll be looking over your shoulder.  How would you know who you can trust?  Yea I have some gringo buddies in colombia but those jokers wouldn't bust a grape in a fruit fight.

Offline Elexpatriado

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Re: A Simple Solution to ATM Syndrome?
« Reply #208 on: February 17, 2014, 08:43:29 AM »
Wow sounds like  areal bad one-lucky you dumped her.

When some girl tells you something is too dangerous- like "You can't go to Tolima because its too dangerous for extranjeros" but she goes there to visit  her "family", check it out from several independent sources- more likely shes hiding something from you- (like here several "Mossos" ...amigos con derechos or Novios).. this can work in reverse too..if they are really desperate  for you to come to thier [snip]-hole town (Like ChinChina, Caucasia or Santander dee Chilchua) They'll understae the dangers- narcos, guerillas,pandillas- so you won't cross them off their list porque "No vale la pena"..

I tried to tell that to my 1st Colombian girlfriend, but she ignored


We wanted to go to an historical site about 2 hours away.  I wanted to go by bus  ($10 each) but she refused to go on bus claiming it is too dangerous.  She wanted to be on taxi.   It costs me $200.  The taxi driver and her kept talking to each other in whole trip.   I don't remember paying the taxi drive for chatting!   She said I must pay the taxi driver extra for lunch.  So it is $200 plus lunch !!!


She lead a very lazy life, expecting luxury life!  She had never cooked home meal even when we stayed at an apartment.  She phoned up and order take away - every day!






When I had my ex-Romanian girl staying at my home for a month 12 years ago.  She complaint that ot was too far for her to walk to the shopping centre which is only 5 minutes walk away.  We had to hop in a bus to get there.    In Romania she walked 45 minutes every day to go to work and also another 45 minutes to get back home!

Offline mambocowboy

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Re: SENDING MONEY CREATES A MONSTER
« Reply #209 on: February 17, 2014, 09:02:23 AM »

Been there with a girl I took out in Cali. She brought TWO friends on a FIRST DATE and they all started ordering all kinds of cocktails and food. When I asked why she brought two friends she said she didn't know me and was afraid to come alone. I excused myself to go to the bathroom and snuck out of the restaurant after I ordered a few things for myself. I have no idea how they paid the check and I don't give a damn either. It's actually too bad as all three of them were at least 8's.


I'm sorry but these days I absolutely refuse to be taken advantage of. And anyone who tries usually isn't going to be happy with the results.
almost choked on my breakfast bagel from laughing at that one, imagining you sneaking out the back...

Offline benjio

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Re: SENDING MONEY CREATES A MONSTER
« Reply #210 on: February 17, 2014, 09:34:46 AM »
Okay...last post gave some of you guys the wrong idea. LOL! It's not necessary to go into detail but I'm no gangster with Colombian hitmen's numbers in my cell phone's speed dial menu. I'm an IT geek that works for a Fortune 500 oil company guys.  ;D


I've met dozens of shady characters in Colombia with all kinds of occupations but I'm not anywhere near dumb or angry enough to ever do what you all are suggesting. I don't have an enemy on the planet that I know of.
« Last Edit: February 17, 2014, 09:43:35 AM by benjio »

Offline bcc_1_2

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Re: SENDING MONEY CREATES A MONSTER
« Reply #211 on: February 17, 2014, 09:53:10 AM »
Okay...last post gave some of you guys the wrong idea. LOL! It's not necessary to go into detail but I'm no gangster with Colombian hitmen's numbers in my cell phone's speed dial menu. I'm an IT geek that works for a Fortune 500 oil company guys.  ;D


I've met dozens of shady characters in Colombia with all kinds of occupations but I'm not anywhere near dumb or angry enough to ever do what you all are suggesting. I don't have an enemy on the planet that I know of.

As you know things work different in Latin America (Colombia) than they do in the USA. I don't see the point in "teaching these women lessons". What you are doing from time to time does leave an impression, but isn't the goal to do your thing while keeping a low profile? Why not just look at your phone and say you have a work or family emergency. Then throw some cash down on the table and excuse yourself.

You say you have no enemies, but I don't think that is true. Are you sure there aren't any women that would like to get you back?
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Offline Elexpatriado

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Re: SENDING MONEY CREATES A MONSTER
« Reply #212 on: February 17, 2014, 11:06:03 AM »

I got some real crazy nut-case woman in Caucasia thats probably sticking needles into a small scale moneca of me right now..but luckily we only met over the internet. I talked to a lot of Colombians and they all claim "Brujeria" and Voodoo only work if the person has seen you personally face-to- face, and can't work from internet fotos or telephone conversations..ohhhh..what's that sudden pain in my chest??? :o :o

As you know things work different in Latin America (Colombia) than they do in the USA. I don't see the point in "teaching these women lessons". What you are doing from time to time does leave an impression, but isn't the goal to do your thing while keeping a low profile? Why not just look at your phone and say you have a work or family emergency. Then throw some cash down on the table and excuse yourself.

You say you have no enemies, but I don't think that is true. Are you sure there aren't any women that would like to get you back?

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Re: SENDING MONEY CREATES A MONSTER
« Reply #212 on: February 17, 2014, 11:06:03 AM »

Offline benjio

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Re: SENDING MONEY CREATES A MONSTER
« Reply #213 on: February 17, 2014, 11:24:38 AM »
As you know things work different in Latin America (Colombia) than they do in the USA. I don't see the point in "teaching these women lessons". What you are doing from time to time does leave an impression, but isn't the goal to do your thing while keeping a low profile? Why not just look at your phone and say you have a work or family emergency. Then throw some cash down on the table and excuse yourself.

You say you have no enemies, but I don't think that is true. Are you sure there aren't any women that would like to get you back?


As you previously stated, there are too many guys out there willing to actually send the money or pay for a restaurant tab to worry about the one that didn't. If you knew where I grew up, or the kinds of places and the kind of people I've hung out with in Colombia I think you'd quickly realize that I don't let fear control the decisions I make. I'm cautious and intelligent, but half of the people you grew up with being murdered gives you a healthy sense of the randomness of our existence. If someone really wants to get to you and they have the determination and the means...even if you're the president of the United States...they're going to get to you. And there's nothing you can do about that. Does the average Colombiana trying to screw guys over for a few million pesos online have the determination or the means? Nope. LS mentioned earlier that his ex was threatening to have something done to him if he returned to Colombia and he didn't do anything wrong to her. Not a thing. So as you can see...being the noble guy in a place like that actually brings more drama to your doorstep than behaving like Colombians do. Believe me when I say I have experience with that. But seriously, do you actually think he's in any kind of real danger? I mean seriously....really?


Someone mentioned doing the same thing I did to a Nigerian trying to screw them out of money online earlier and there were no objections to that; but for some reason my actions are being associated with anger and revenge. My intention is not to deter that kind of behavior...nor do I expect what I'm doing to give them a second of pause the next time they have the opportunity to screw someone over. I guess there are those that are content watching from the sidelines as the evil people of the world operate and those that do their part to remind them decent people aren't always going to be pushovers and there's never going to be consequence for their actions.
« Last Edit: February 17, 2014, 11:47:34 AM by benjio »

Offline Elexpatriado

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Re: SENDING MONEY CREATES A MONSTER
« Reply #214 on: February 17, 2014, 03:02:05 PM »
My"ex" is another case..but I survived so far, so as Benjio says, maybe she doesnt have the where-with-all to find a real good Bruja or Brujo (and sicarios attract too much attention when Expats are the target and all fingers are pointing to you). Plus, I think the Brujas  and I am sure the Sicarios have to know where you are to do anything, and I am not in the same palce for more than a couple weeks at the most.. ;) :D
 
I got some real crazy nut-case woman in Caucasia thats probably sticking needles into a small scale moneca of me right now..but luckily we only met over the internet. I talked to a lot of Colombians and they all claim "Brujeria" and Voodoo only work if the person has seen you personally face-to- face, and can't work from internet fotos or telephone conversations..ohhhh..what's that sudden pain in my chest??? :o :o

Offline bcc_1_2

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Re: SENDING MONEY CREATES A MONSTER
« Reply #215 on: February 17, 2014, 03:08:56 PM »
My"ex" is another case..but I survived so far, so as Benjio says, maybe she doesnt have the where-with-all to find a real good Bruja or Brujo (and sicarios attract too much attention when Expats are the target and all fingers are pointing to you). Plus, I think the Brujas  and I am sure the Sicarios have to know where you are to do anything, and I am not in the same palce for more than a couple weeks at the most.. ;) :D

Look guys when you are the exception to rule you might just want to make note that the average gringo ought to try and just keep his head down. I swear I heard a story about a gringo that made all kinds of false promises to this chica. But he didn't keep any and just went home. Some months later he was back to his old stomping grounds overseas and he literally got stomped (beat to F up).


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Offline fathertime

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Re: SENDING MONEY CREATES A MONSTER
« Reply #216 on: February 17, 2014, 10:14:15 PM »
when 'dating' in colombia i can recall a couple times i felt like an atm at suppertime....one spectacular looking gal brought her friend along, unannounced of course...i just paid and left it at that...i can recall another gal that did the same thing...and that 'relationship' went a little farther but ultimately fizzed...i don't miss the extra 10-20 bucks but i do remember having a nice physical time with her a couple times afterwords.   


if i were dating again in colombia and looking for a serious relationship, and I felt this MIGHT occur, i could consider mentioning on the phone to not bring anybody along... if i were dating in colombia and NOT looking for a serious relationship, then I might just have fun with the whole thing... 


it isn't a serious amount of money so my viewpoint is it isn't that important...and it is helpful if it helps weed out a brazen gold digger....maybe the gold digger has some more considerate friends.


Fathertime! 
09/08 saw morena goddess on Jamie's website
09/08Began writing/webcamming future wife
10/08Visited BAQ to meet future wife
12/08 Visited a second time and got engaged
01/09 Visa Paperwork done(williamIII)
02/09quickvisit BAQ
08/09Wife arrives
09/09Got married
11/10 son born

Offline fathertime

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Re: SENDING MONEY CREATES A MONSTER
« Reply #217 on: February 17, 2014, 10:24:41 PM »

I will admit that during my last trip to Jamie's I met a girl from his agency and went out with her one night. We had a very good date. The next date, she brought her Mom, little sister and her little cousin to the restaurant. The only reason I let it slide was because of the two little girls; but I didn't call her again. Two days later she called the agency and asked was I upset about her bringing her other family members. I said no, but it wasn't a good idea.



Yeah not a good idea, especially since she did not inform you of what she was going to do...I can just imagine your delighted face when you saw all the extras she brought along on your nickel....


  the way you tell the story makes me think she wasn't trying to scam you outta meal money...she probably just liked you and wanted to show you off...whaddya think of her intentions in retrospect?


Fathertime!   
09/08 saw morena goddess on Jamie's website
09/08Began writing/webcamming future wife
10/08Visited BAQ to meet future wife
12/08 Visited a second time and got engaged
01/09 Visa Paperwork done(williamIII)
02/09quickvisit BAQ
08/09Wife arrives
09/09Got married
11/10 son born

Offline benjio

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Re: SENDING MONEY CREATES A MONSTER
« Reply #218 on: February 18, 2014, 03:47:58 AM »

Yeah not a good idea, especially since she did not inform you of what she was going to do...I can just imagine your delighted face when you saw all the extras she brought along on your nickel....


  the way you tell the story makes me think she wasn't trying to scam you outta meal money...she probably just liked you and wanted to show you off...whaddya think of her intentions in retrospect?


Fathertime!


FT,

I honestly don't think she was trying to scam me. It was just a bad decision on her part. I actually believe she genuinely liked me and wanted me to meet her family. She was a very nice, pretty girl, and if a gringo asked me about her today I wouldn't have a bad thing to say. She was just moving too fast. I've bought meals in nice restaurants for plenty of groups of friends and associates in Colombia. Just not women I hardly know and their families. By telling that story I was just trying to show that I'm not some heartless prick leaving girls with restaurant tabs to pay all over Latin America. There's a difference between those trying to scam and take advantage of gringos and those that assume there's no limit to the gringo pocket book and we're automatically willing to crack it open for anyone we associate with.
« Last Edit: February 18, 2014, 04:00:25 AM by benjio »

Offline benjio

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Re: SENDING MONEY CREATES A MONSTER
« Reply #219 on: February 18, 2014, 03:54:25 AM »
Look guys when you are the exception to rule you might just want to make note that the average gringo ought to try and just keep his head down. I swear I heard a story about a gringo that made all kinds of false promises to this chica. But he didn't keep any and just went home. Some months later he was back to his old stomping grounds overseas and he literally got stomped (beat to F up).


If you spend significant time in a country like Colombia you're going to rub some people the wrong way. It's inevitable. The cultural values of the average gringo are simply too different to live in complete harmony with everyone you associate with. Look at guys like Jamie who have been there for a while. He's had very bad experiences with former employees, cab drivers, etc. And that's just the stories he's told me. I'm not sure if he's ever had his life threatened but there are probably people in Barranquilla that wouldn't flinch at the idea of something bad happening to him. He doesn't let it bother him or turn him into a recluse. You just have to be careful, intelligent and cautious about who you're dealing with.


I can't tell you how many storires I've heard from gringos about Colombians trying to scam them, and then threatening them after the scam doesn't work out. My question to you BCC is where is the line drawn for you? Are you saying you'd rather give up the money knowing you're being taken because there's a small chance something might happen to you someday because you didn't? That just doesn't make any sense to me. From my experience Colombians aren't ignorant to the fact that they aren't entitled to something just because they're telling you they are. Most just accept their attempt to defraud you didn't work and try it on the next poor sap.


I guess you're suggesting that there's a chance I could run into that girl again in Cali, or wherever else and she could have something done to me. I think there's a much greater chance of something randomly happening to me like being robbed and/or shot/stabbed just walking around Colombia. But like I said, I don't let fear drive me. If that were the case I wouldn't have ever gone in the first place. I'm a Texan. We don't tuck tail for anyone!  ;D
« Last Edit: February 18, 2014, 04:09:55 AM by benjio »

Offline Elexpatriado

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Re: SENDING MONEY CREATES A MONSTER
« Reply #220 on: February 18, 2014, 07:19:32 AM »

Most of your everyday scammers are actually quite gutless and scared of the police or going to jail or getting in trouble with the "authorities" ..and that includes all out prepagos, because after all, it's legal in Colombia. These people use the gringos ignorance and fear to try to manipulate them. If you spend enough time here and speak the language, you can see through the bull[snip]. :)
[size=78%]
If you spend significant time in a country like Colombia you're going to rub some people the wrong way. It's inevitable. The cultural values of the average gringo are simply too different to live in complete harmony with everyone you associate with. Look at guys like Jamie who have been there for a while. He's had very bad experiences with former employees, cab drivers, etc. And that's just the stories he's told me. I'm not sure if he's ever had his life threatened but there are probably people in Barranquilla that wouldn't flinch at the idea of something bad happening to him. He doesn't let it bother him or turn him into a recluse. You just have to be careful, intelligent and cautious about who you're dealing with.


I can't tell you how many storires I've heard from gringos about Colombians trying to scam them, and then threatening them after the scam doesn't work out. My question to you BCC is where is the line drawn for you? Are you saying you'd rather give up the money knowing you're being taken because there's a small chance something might happen to you someday because you didn't? That just doesn't make any sense to me. From my experience Colombians aren't ignorant to the fact that they aren't entitled to something just because they're telling you they are. Most just accept their attempt to defraud you didn't work and try it on the next poor sap.


I guess you're suggesting that there's a chance I could run into that girl again in Cali, or wherever else and she could have something done to me. I think there's a much greater chance of something randomly happening to me like being robbed and/or shot/stabbed just walking around Colombia. But like I said, I don't let fear drive me. If that were the case I wouldn't have ever gone in the first place. I'm a Texan. We don't tuck tail for anyone!  ;D
[/size]

Offline robert angel

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Re: SENDING MONEY CREATES A MONSTER
« Reply #221 on: February 18, 2014, 07:38:14 AM »
I've had women try to scam me. Some quite soon, others who did so over time, as I got more involved--the ones who are smart enough to wait to set the hook. The ones who showed it early on, I typically just stopped answering there in comings. Ones who I'd gotten to know better got an explanation and then typically no more contact.

I'm not afraid, but the fact is that it is a pretty small world if you travel and even more so if you're on-line. Either way, chances are bigger than you might think that you may have mutual acquaintances and/or your physical paths may overlap. Seems when we go to different cities in Asia, we see people out shopping or eating out that we've seen before. 100 million people and we chance to run into the same ones on the streets. I avoid making scenes or being sucked into dramas, as those things have a way of lingering.
Whether you think you can or think you can't--you're right!

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Re: SENDING MONEY CREATES A MONSTER
« Reply #222 on: February 18, 2014, 07:54:59 AM »

if i were dating again in colombia and looking for a serious relationship, and I felt this MIGHT occur, i could consider mentioning on the phone to not bring anybody along...

Fathertime!


When after spliting up with my 1st novia, I went back to Cali when CaliCharm was already closing down.  I stayed with friends (from Calicharm).  Carol has helped me phoning a lady that I liked.   The lady asked her if she could bring a friend.   Carol shouted "NO!"   Carol knew about the dating game as she worked for ACG before.    Anyway I went to dinner with this lady  ZZZZZzZZZZZzzzzzzZZ !! lol




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Re: SENDING MONEY CREATES A MONSTER
« Reply #222 on: February 18, 2014, 07:54:59 AM »

Gato4Astrid

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Re: SENDING MONEY CREATES A MONSTER
« Reply #223 on: February 18, 2014, 07:59:11 AM »

Yeah not a good idea, especially since she did not inform you of what she was going to do...I can just imagine your delighted face when you saw all the extras she brought along on your nickel....


  the way you tell the story makes me think she wasn't trying to scam you outta meal money...she probably just liked you and wanted to show you off...whaddya think of her intentions in retrospect?


Fathertime!


I thought EXACTLY the same thing.  But we both know that she was wrong about not informing him and it was also wrong of her to bring them into a restaurant.


When it was my ex-novia's birthday on 14th December.  I was there for 5 days.  She invited many of her family to her (and her twin brother's birthday) to her house and asked me to buy all the food!!!  That was for 30 people!!!    At the end of the day, I don't remember anyone thanked me for that!!






Offline robert angel

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Re: SENDING MONEY CREATES A MONSTER
« Reply #224 on: February 18, 2014, 08:06:00 AM »

When it was my ex-novia's birthday on 14th December.  I was there for 5 days.  She invited many of her family to her (and her twin brother's birthday) to her house and asked me to buy all the food!!!  That was for 30 people!!!    At the end of the day, I don't remember anyone thanked me for that!!

You go overseas to many places and they just assume you're rich. Never tell them how much money you make, because even if it's a very basic amount, they usually quickly convert into their currency and it's many times more than what someone doing your job there makes. Not realizing the cost of living where you live, they often just assume you're totally loaded and that as such, you should pay for everything. Worse yet, if you don't, some will assume you're a cheap skate.
Whether you think you can or think you can't--you're right!

 

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