SENDING MONEY CREATES A MONSTER

[gyounger]

Had a feeling it was going to be the Seahawks.
Record setting offenses are 0-fer in SBs.

Yeah, it's a cliche but it's true.
Defense wins championships.

But back on topic. Hang in there, LS.
You'll find a good one. Just take it slow and easy.

[Ray]

Though I'm not a Seahawks fan, I thoroughly enjoyed the Stupid Bowl.
 
 
It's always fun to see one of the Manning boys getting their pansy ass bitch-slapped all over the field... 
 
 
Ray
 
 
 

[mambocowboy]

Mambo, 

I think my reason for ending up with the girls that hose me over is cause I  ignore my inner voice   I knew that there were issues for a while... She did not like that I wore Cowboy boots and would not let me where them.  I just was never good enough and it lead to her trying to change everything about me.  I just was in too deep to pull out and give up.  I would not mind helping but not at the level where a girl makes me feel like that's all I am.  I just cant help but think what are they doing now with out my money.  I know she really wanted money for the phone bill and would not give it to her... She is really a lazy ass and I dont know what she is gonna do now thatshe has to earn her money again.  I guess it is not my worry and being concerned delays my healing process...  I admit I cared about her...  I guess like all things this will take time to pass.

there were a lot of red flags with that chick, from what you've mentioned. To me, another red flag would've been the fact she apparently was neither in school nor working...And like the other guys said, she probably moved on very quickly to her next prospect. There will always be gringos willing to fund a trophy girlfriend/wife. Some gringos have plenty of cash and never say no to these women, so things can seemingly progress just fine until the guy says no, and then he  realizes he has a problem...

[Awesome]

LS, the way you describe this chick, she sounds like a textbook case of the golddigger prepago types that everyone says to watch out for.  She probably saw you coming a mile away.  I wouldn't be surprised if she's a professional scammer who's already pulled this crap on countless other unsuspecting men.


I say if you give it another try, let jamie and maybe a couple of guys from the board (FT, MC) monitor closely how things are progressing so if red flags start popping up they can advise you how to proceed before things spiral out of control like this one did.

[benjio]

I say if you give it another try, let jamie and maybe a couple of guys from the board (FT, MC) monitor closely how things are progressing so if red flags start popping up they can advise you how to proceed before things spiral out of control like this one did.

What is he? A thirteen year old that needs a chaperone at the school dance? The worst thing you can do in any relationship is have a third wheel on the sidelines trying to call plays. Probably the best and most obvious advice I can give any gringo is when someone that stands nothing to gain from doing so tells you a woman isn't worth a damn because they've seen her in action, listen to them. At the very least, follow up and try to figure out why the person is telling you that before falling head over heels.

[Kiltboy1]

LS

I always had a little game I played with the Goldiggers that asked for money.

I told them" I never give money to a woman I am not involved in a intimate and sexual relationship". You can separate the players like that and sometimes have some fun too

[Awesome]

LS

I always had a little game I played with the Goldiggers that asked for money.

I told them" I never give money to a woman I am not involved in a intimate and sexual relationship". You can separate the players like that and sometimes have some fun too

What if you've already had sex by the time she asks for money?  Of course she's not going to ask immediately after having sex(hopefully), but maybe a week later.

[Awesome]

What is he? A thirteen year old that needs a chaperone at the school dance?

Lmao!!

The worst thing you can do in any relationship is have a third wheel on the sidelines trying to call plays.[/size]

[/size]
[/size][size=78%]Not necessarily.  For example, he could've been giving the board play by play updates like some guys do, and he probably wouldn've received some good advice, especially from the guys who've been there done that.  All I recall about LS is he was acting like a puppy dog in love before he'd even gone to colombia or even met any women.  Wasn't he the one who had some romantic movie scene rehearsed about he was going to be this knight in shining armor and he had an ipad all ready to give to the first woman who captured his heart.  Guys like that could probably use some close attention from jamie or the planet love "experts".[/size]
[/size]
[/size]

[/size][size=78%] Probably the best and most obvious advice I can give any gringo is when someone that stands nothing to gain from doing so tells you a woman isn't worth a damn because they've seen her in action, listen to them. At the very least, follow up and try to figure out why the person is telling you that before falling head over heels.[/size]

Did this actually happen in LS's case?

[Gato4Astrid]

Mambo, 

She did not like that I wore Cowboy boots and would not let me where them.  I just was never good enough and it lead to her trying to change everything about me.

My last ex-novia from Italy wanted to change my image, and trying to change me into ITALIAN!  WTF!  She was a control freak, telling me what to do etc....

[Kiltboy1]

What if you've already had sex by the time she asks for money?  Of course she's not going to ask immediately after having sex(hopefully), but maybe a week later.

MMM
Because I know how to say "NO"

[Kiltboy1]

What if you've already had sex by the time she asks for money?  Of course she's not going to ask immediately after having sex(hopefully), but maybe a week later.

All kidding aside, you have to have had some bad things happen in your FB quest to grow some thick skin to be somewhat immune to what you will encounter in your travels south.

I learned to say no by getting clobbered a few times. Through that I was able to get the Paola's out of my system and look for what really mattered to me in a woman.

In my case it was not a stay at home, cook for me, clean for me  girl, nor the Paola type party and be seen. It was a woman who wanted to be beside a good man and work as a team with parenting, working, and all the other great things that marriage can offer if the two people are committed to the same things. I have that with a very professional and wonderful educated woman who never wanted me to give her anything but love and to accept her son as my own( He's a great kid). We have a great family and it took a lot of Paola's to get to where I am at.

LS can get there too if he looks for the underlying qualities and not the Booty(Love Paola's though)

[fathertime]

Father time. I read your comment about Jamie picking the girls for me.  Problem with that is that  is my physical tastes are or may not be the same.   To me its either hit or miss...I dont have the same selection pool as others.  I am a bigger guy not obese fat but it makes it very hard on the owners cause I am so not built like the wimpy puppy latin guys down there.  So they either love me or hate me when they see my picture.

  Hey LS,  I hear you, frankly I would rather pick my own as well....I made the suggestion as something to think about because you seem to be having a hard time picking women that aren't in it for the wrong reasons....If somebody else like Jamie was picking them for you, at least that part would very likely be eliminated..then it would be a matter of if she is attractive/interesting enough for you.... Insofar as being large, I don't think that matters much as many, women are just fine with that aspect of a man, and if they aren't they would have seen your photo beforehand to say 'no thanks'...which is to be expected for many of us anyway.  I have always felt like just moving on to the ones that ARE interested and leaving it at that. 


Anyhoo, I think if you stick with it, you will find yourself a fine women...I traveled and enjoyed for several years before finding a lady that I wanted to give it a go with...had a couple shaky women along the way...it is to be expected I suppose. 


Fathertime!

[Elexpatriado]

Yeah..her mother is always gonna be ahead of you, maybe her family , and maybe even her favorite Mosso..dont kid yerselves..listen to Awesome..I agree with him here.. if yer to cheap to take care of the kid thats one thing..but don't "kid" yourself into thinking you'll EVER be more important than here family (Pun intended)

I'll tell you exactly what's up with that.  There's a huge fundamental difference between a woman's love for her child and her love for her man.  It's two different kind of loves and the two do not, cannot conflict.


The insecurity come into play when a guy feels threatened by the kid in thinking that by loving the kid that the woman is somehow still showing feelings for the father of the child.  Bam!  Insecurity.
 

I've dated single mothers who've shown me me more love than some childless women that I've dated.  And just because she doesn't have a child doesn't mean your automatically "first"(whatever that means anyway).  She still has a mother, father, brothers, sisters who may be ahead of you on the love line.


All you have to worry about is if your the FIRST MAN in her heart.  And if she truly loves you and you're the ONLY MAN in her heart, then kids, moms, dads, brothers, sisters, grandparents, cousins, are not your competition.

[Elexpatriado]

So Who really gives a Fok, this aint some kinda competion, mu dick is bigger than your dick or something..going way off topic..

It has nothing to do with insecurity and everything to do with a man's preference. If a guy doesn't want to deal with problems, headaches, an extra mouth to feed, limited availability, limited ability to travel and a whole laundry list of potential problems, that's his prerogative. Actually, I think an insecure man would prefer a woman with a kid(s) because she's gonna be a lot less likely to leave him (she's probably not gonna be hanging out at bars; she's probably going to want the stability of a man, etc).

Awesome/Htown-  It sounds like you are taking this very personally. Were you raised by a single mother?

[Gato4Astrid]

What if you've already had sex by the time she asks for money?  Of course she's not going to ask immediately after having sex(hopefully), but maybe a week later.

She said "Do you really think I am a prostitute?"


His reply "Well, do you really think I am an ATM?"


A prostitute needs an ATM - that's fact!

[Elexpatriado]

What she's doin now is lookin for anoter Maranno sucker gringo- and if that don't work, sellin' her ass in a house of prepagos. Once they get spoiled, it's hard for them to go back.

Mambo, 

I think my reason for ending up with the girls that hose me over is cause I  ignore my inner voice   I knew that there were issues for a while... She did not like that I wore Cowboy boots and would not let me where them.  I just was never good enough and it lead to her trying to change everything about me.  I just was in too deep to pull out and give up.  I would not mind helping but not at the level where a girl makes me feel like that's all I am.  I just cant help but think what are they doing now with out my money.  I know she really wanted money for the phone bill and would not give it to her... She is really a lazy ass and I dont know what she is gonna do now thatshe has to earn her money again.  I guess it is not my worry and being concerned delays my healing process...  I admit I cared about her...  I guess like all things this will take time to pass.

[Elexpatriado]

You can put here profile and history on every single site and every single agency in in Spanish and English. I saw tat once on LAC, CC and FaceBook- some Venezuelan guy gottaken by a girl from Cartago or periera and posted this"Puta -interesada-Sacadora- Pinchada-abusadora- enganadora" diatribe on every single site. I thought about doing it to my ex- but said foch it...guys can figure it out if they really want to..

Although Awesome's post isn't directed towards me, to clarify things I was not trying to say dating a woman with children is a bad idea and I don't believe I ever made that statement. I was saying that I, just like BCC, couldn't do it after a few bad experiences and I gave my reasons. I also wanted to bring the additional challenges of dating a foreign woman with childen to everyone's attention. I too have the utmost respect for any man that commits himself to becoming a father to children that aren't biologically his. The world needs more men like that. I'm just not one of them.



LS, not to make you feel even more $hitty but there are plenty of avenues she can take to meet more gringos and plenty of guys out there that "ignore their inner voice," or simply don't know better. Jamie's agency is only one of many ways single Colombianas can meet foreigners. I've met just as many Colombianas on LatinEuro, Colombian and Latin American Cupid as I've met through Jamie's Agency. I wouldn't for a second assume this girl is going to go without just because you're not giving her anything else. She has shown a capacity to lie to, deceive and use a man to get what she wants without it messing with her conscience. Even to the extent to where he can't provide for himself. You weren't her first and you won't be her last. Most girls I know like her keep another guy on standby just for the type of situations she's finding herself in now. If anything, from my experience, meeting and having a relationship with someone like you has only taught her what she shouldn't do when she finds her next sponsor. Girls like her get better at what they do with time...as long as they stay attractive. Then, for a woman like that, becoming a prepago is always an attractive option as well. The lack of any kind of moral compass is apparently already there.

[robert angel]

What she's doin now is lookin for anoter Maranno sucker gringo- and if that don't work, sellin' her ass in a house of prepagos. Once they get spoiled, it's hard for them to go back.

Once you've been selling your body--giving sex for money, it changes you forever. Whether you want to put it all behind you and try to forget about it or not, you never lose that awareness that sex and your body in particular, are saleable commodities. When things get rough, it all too often simply becomes another option they can exercise. And they think about it, rough times or not. It skews their perspective forever.

I've seen too many guys take up with 'bar girls' thinking that hot dogs, apple pie, Chevrolets and the USA would turn them into good girls. It rarely, rarely does. (They do like the hot dogs though)

[LatinSharpei]

Guys.. I was warned privately about her...  I did not believe it was the same girl so I left it go...  I made mistakes all the way around.  I appreciate the support I got from the site... I have a pretty good friend that helped me removed head from arse.  With the money I had been wasting I  have gotten set up with a personal trainer and filled the kitchen full of good food.  I have a serious nine week goal to get where I always wanted to be physically.   I am not sure what the future holds as far as me returning.  The best I can say is atleast I got out with my job health and a positive out look.  I assume I will get a call tomorrow asking for money again being I just got paid and all...   She ain't getting a dime

[Kiltboy1]

Guys.. I was warned privately about her...  I did not believe it was the same girl so I left it go...  I made mistakes all the way around.  I appreciate the support I got from the site... I have a pretty good friend that helped me removed head from arse.  With the money I had been wasting I  have gotten set up with a personal trainer and filled the kitchen full of good food.  I have a serious nine week goal to get where I always wanted to be physically.   I am not sure what the future holds as far as me returning.  The best I can say is atleast I got out with my job health and a positive out look.  I assume I will get a call tomorrow asking for money again being I just got paid and all...   She ain't getting a dime

LS

If you really want to be DONE with her, just block her from all calls and emails.

There is no need to have any contact with her period and I mean PERIOD !

Good luck with all the things you have going on. You have lots of people here that can look objectively for you when your eyes glass over.

KB

[JWR]

Guys.. I was warned privately about her...  I did not believe it was the same girl so I left it go...  I made mistakes all the way around.  I appreciate the support I got from the site... I have a pretty good friend that helped me removed head from arse.  With the money I had been wasting I  have gotten set up with a personal trainer and filled the kitchen full of good food.  I have a serious nine week goal to get where I always wanted to be physically.   I am not sure what the future holds as far as me returning.  The best I can say is atleast I got out with my job health and a positive out look.  I assume I will get a call tomorrow asking for money again being I just got paid and all...   She ain't getting a dime

Latin S.  Hey you've had an adventure!  Good onya.  If you would have stayed home, nothing would have happened.  You say you made some mistakes......well I don't know, you didn't marry her!  I think the most important thing when diving into this international dating thing is to have a good time.  Make a few memories.  I assume you were getting laid while you were there.  Don't take it too seriously until you get a few miles under your belt.  The chase can be a lot of fun.  Education almost always costs a few bucks.  Now your ready for your next round, and it should go better.

[mambocowboy]

Latin S.  Hey you've had an adventure!  Good onya.  If you would have stayed home, nothing would have happened.  You say you made some mistakes......well I don't know, you didn't marry her!  I think the most important thing when diving into this international dating thing is to have a good time.  Make a few memories.  I assume you were getting laid while you were there.  Don't take it too seriously until you get a few miles under your belt.  The chase can be a lot of fun.  Education almost always costs a few bucks.  Now your ready for your next round, and it should go better.

while one can find a wife over there, I think it's often forgotten a guy could have a hell of a lot of fun over there if he's not overly attached to any outcome. I mean, even if a relationship doesn't work out, you still get an inside (pardon the pun) experience of the culture your average tourist never gets...

[buencamino]

You are always going to have to give money to a colombiana whether she's your novia or a prepago it's just that with the PP you give it right away while with the novia there will be a short grace period. But you will have to give it or the relationship, either one won't last. With the generally huge difference in incomes it's not unresonable.

[benjio]

You are always going to have to give money to a colombiana whether she's your novia or a prepago it's just that with the PP you give it right away while with the novia there will be a short grace period. But you will have to give it or the relationship, either one won't last. With the generally huge difference in incomes it's not unresonable.

Which goes back to BCC's preference for women that don't need financial assistance of any kind. He's of the opinion that dating girls from more affluent backgrounds rules out the possibility of getting serious about a girl that secretly has alterior motives. A "live for the moment" girl like LS's ex never realized that adjusting her behavior would have meant more money for her in the long run. All she had to do was control herself and ride it out. But there are girls with enough common sense to be on their best behaviors and endure having a relationship with a man they don't truly love to improve upon their quality of life. Luckily that's as rare in Colombia as girls that don't need or want financial assistance. With a Colombiana, those true colors almost always shine through.

I still think it's a tad bit unrealistic to rule out poorer girls because of how difficult it is to find decent work in Colombia (especially for a woman). There are women out there from affluent backgrounds that wouldn't need a peso from you but they are few and far between. You eliminate entirely too many good women that may not be in the best situation financially, but would have no intention of using you for what you could give them if you were in a relationship. They are out there. When I was dating if I liked a girl I would always give them a chance regardless of their estrato. During that time I met plenty of barrio girls that were only interested in a new iPhone or a Michael Kors purse, but I also met a few that wouldn't even let me pay for a meal or their taxi fare. I also dated girls with money that were only interested in what I could give them. Ultimately socio-economic status has nothing to do with virtue, character or personality.

As I previously explained a girl knowing English can be tricky as well. Colombians that know English fluently not only took English classes but they almost always frequently associate with foreigners. That can obviously be a good thing if she's a hotel receptionist or an Avianca Flight Attendent. But if there's no gleeming explanation for how she can speak English fluently in a country like Colombia, I'd research her background before getting too attached. Some guys (especially in Brazil) have no problem settling down with a girl they know worked as a prostitute at some point in the past. I'm not one of them.

[mambocowboy]

Which goes back to BCC's preference for women that don't need financial assistance of any kind. He's of the opinion that dating girls from more affluent backgrounds rules out the possibility of getting serious about a girl that secretly has alterior motives. A "live for the moment" girl like LS's ex never realized that adjusting her behavior would have meant more money for her in the long run. All she had to do was control herself and ride it out. But there are girls with enough common sense to be on their best behaviors and endure having a relationship with a man they don't truly love to improve upon their quality of life. Luckily that's as rare in Colombia as girls that don't need or want financial assistance. With a Colombiana, those true colors almost always shine through.

I still think it's a tad bit unrealistic to rule out poorer girls because of how difficult it is to find decent work in Colombia (especially for a woman). There are women out there from affluent backgrounds that wouldn't need a peso from you but they are few and far between. You eliminate entirely too many good women that may not be in the best situation financially, but would have no intention of using you for what you could give them if you were in a relationship. They are out there. When I was dating if I liked a girl I would always give them a chance regardless of their estrato. During that time I met plenty of barrio girls that were only interested in a new iPhone or a Michael Kors purse, but I also met a few that wouldn't even let me pay for a meal or their taxi fare. I also dated girls with money that were only interested in what I could give them. Ultimately socio-economic status has nothing to do with virtue, character or personality.

As I previously explained a girl knowing English can be tricky as well. Colombians that know English fluently not only took English classes but they almost always frequently associate with foreigners. That can obviously be a good thing if she's a hotel receptionist or an Avianca Flight Attendent. But if there's no gleeming explanation for how she can speak English fluently in a country like Colombia, I'd research her background before getting too attached. Some guys (especially in Brazil) have no problem settling down with a girl they know worked as a prostitute at some point in the past. I'm not one of them.

you're still on the hook until she can work in your country. I'll give you an example. My wife was working in Colombia and giving money to her parents who are dirt poor. So when she came here that source of income for them was cut off for the last 20 months. Now that my wife went back home for the first time in January and saw how poor her family is compared to our standard of living, she keeps asking me in tears to send money so I've agreed to send $200 a month. I thought the fact she came from a close family was so great (which of course it is), but it also means she feels responsible for them, so guess who has to pay....