A Question about your wife/novia's religious habits/beliefs

[Elexpatriado]

 
I dont agree and yet I do agree. The Peanuts you pay for those sites ($15 a month or something)is nothing and not a deterent in itself compared to the time you spend corresponding with them, flying down  there, meeting them, paying for dates.
 
However $15 a month is a lot for some of them, and even if it was 10,000 COP for them, you would have far lesss chicas there.
 
Same with those agency events. The reason you get so many chicks compared to guys is cuz a few guys pay big money to go to the event, and the chicas get frree food and drinks. Plus maybe the chance to meet someon "from a different culture".
 
These sites and agencies livelihood depend on money from lonely, desperate, horney, or otherwise interested males , whether foreigners or not.
 
You would be surprised to know there are probably more Colombian males on Colombian Cupid then foreigners, and definitely more male Latinos than gringos.Same with LAC (as far as Latinos). Also, I have seen Mexicans and other Latinos at the agencies...

Yes, Mambo, I hear you. Weeding through all those non-serious, fake and/or scam profiles to find a real gem is a veritable pain in the you know what.

Met one girl whose profile said she only finished high school. When we got to chatting it turns out she has a university degree. Asked her why she missed that part? Her reply, she didn't notice and she wasn't taking the site too seriously.

[robert angel]

I dont agree and yet I do agree. The Peanuts you pay for those sites ($15 a month or something)is nothing and not a deterent in itself compared to the time you spend corresponding with them, flying down  there, meeting them, paying for dates.
 
However $15 a month is a lot for some of them, and even if it was 10,000 COP for them, you would have far lesss chicas there.
 
Same with those agency events. The reason you get so many chicks compared to guys is cuz a few guys pay big money to go to the event, and the chicas get frree food and drinks. Plus maybe the chance to meet someon "from a different culture".
 
These sites and agencies livelihood depend on money from lonely, desperate, horney, or otherwise interested males , whether foreigners or not.
 
You would be surprised to know there are probably more Colombian males on Colombian Cupid then foreigners, and definitely more male Latinos than gringos.Same with LAC (as far as Latinos). Also, I have seen Mexicans and other Latinos at the agencies...

Hard to believe, but yet I'm not surprised--it probably is true! I certainly would not wager against it. And part of why I am not surprised is because like a lot of N Americans, we think that we have it all. In some ways we do--we have of a lot of world 'bests', be it medical care (at a high price), colleges, sports, military power, etc.,but it's the "We're the best--#1 'mindset'" that sometimes blurs our judgment, (irritates many people abroad), yet leaves us thinking all these babes abroad are willing to hop in our laps and come to the USA. It would be a lot more like that in the case if we were also pulling millions of dollars in a cart behind us. Let's not be fooled that it's not always so much of what we are, where we're from or what we look like that makes these women reply or even send their 'interests' to us.

I like to joke that I'm insulted that people in Colombia don't speak English--that there ought to be a law, and everyone should take Yankee dollars too. But the fact is that in each country, people tend to gravitate to their own, in terms of people and neighborhoods. Familiar and family. It's more the exception than the rule that women want to marry and leave it all behind. And amongst those who do, there are a lot who just have miserable, impoverished lives, making their 'fantasy' about life in the USA and the allure of money all the more dangerous for us. There's a lot of sorting and weeding out to do on both ends.

I'm still all about finding your 'squeeze', your GF, wife, whatever you want to call her (or him) abroad, just don't delude yourself. Not everyone is doing it simply because they're adventurous souls, looking for true love with someone who looks and talks differently from a distant nation. Of course the guys here, for example, and guys with similar interests towards love abroad are a small minority in N. America. Men and women alike in the USA find their matches close to home by and large--why should it be so different elsewhere?

[benjio]

But the fact is that in each country, people tend to gravitate to their own, in terms of people and neighborhoods. Familiar and family....

Robert,
 
That's a very good point. Living here in Rio for a while now, I find myself going well out of my way to be around Americans. I will pass up perfectly good restaurants, bars and pubs in the area where I live and pay twice as much for a taxi (not to mention the inflated costs of food and drinks) to get to a place where I know they'll be gringos hanging out. Even worse, in Rio de Janeiro prostitutes gravitate towards any place that's frequented by men from the United States. So sometimes I also have to deal with being constantly propositioned. And believe me when I tell you that the working girls here can be quite persistent. Apparently, "No...I have a girlfriend," means "I'll pay you for sex if you keep bothering and touching on me." At this point speaking with someone in English about American Football is like going on an island vacation for me.
 
Even when I was back in Houston it was the same with most foreigners regardless of where they were from. After NYC I'm willing to bet that Houston is in the running for the second most diverse city in the union. There are entire areas of town, and by areas I mean dozens and dozens of city blocks, where you'll only find Vietnamese, Korean, Pakistani or Colombian people. They all go to the same places, do the same things and fervently support the business's of their countrymen. I think it's a reasonable expectation for a man to get involved in the community (if there is one locally) of the culture his wife comes from when he brings her back to his home country. I remeber Whitey writing about that at some level in the past.
 
 

[Awesome]

I think it's a reasonable expectation for a man to get involved in the community (if there is one locally) of the culture his wife comes from when he brings her back to his home country.

If a gringo is able to get involved in these communities in the first place he would never have to leave the country to find a foreign born wife.  Cities like nyc, houston, miami, los angeles have HUGE latino and asian populations.  I'm talking hundreds of thousands of foreign born women who would be interested in marrying a gringo.

Another thing to keep in mind is many gringos would probably prefer to keep his foreign wife as far away as possible from her own people once she's in the us.  They don't want her to run off with a latino that she's actually attracted to.

[stnmasn]

Awesome tu no puedes hablar en serio…."many gringos would like to keep his foreign wife as far away as possible from her own people once she's in the US"   


is that quote for real? is it true? I can't believe it. How selfish and lame a thing to do to someone that the person supposedly "loves"…….i had the opposite approach. I didn't want her to feel so alone so i encouraged her associating worth other people from her culture.


wow the poor girls who are kept from their gente  que triste. 


Is that statement true Awesome or are you just assuming?


Is there anybody here that can give input as to whether this attitude of keeping your foreign bride isolated from her "own people" is a real thing or just imagined.


WOW what a lame approach to making a loving relationship last for the long term…"keep her away from what she knows and loves"…her culture


you can't be for real Awesome

[Awesome]

Awesome tu no puedes hablar en serio…."many gringos would like to keep his foreign wife as far away as possible from her own people once she's in the US"   


is that quote for real? is it true? I can't believe it. How selfish and lame a thing to do to someone that the person supposedly "loves"…….i had the opposite approach. I didn't want her to feel so alone so i encouraged her associating worth other people from her culture.


wow the poor girls who are kept from their gente  que triste. 


Is that statement true Awesome or are you just assuming?


Is there anybody here that can give input as to whether this attitude of keeping your foreign bride isolated from her "own people" is a real thing or just imagined.


WOW what a lame approach to making a loving relationship last for the long term…"keep her away from what she knows and loves"…her culture


you can't be for real Awesome

Well let's break it down for you there stnmsn.  I think we all agree that ALL women who sign up on these gringo dating websites and agencies are first and foremost looking to improve their situation by finding a "rich gringo".  Finding true love is second place, and for most it's a far second place.

Most if not all men who search for a wife from a poor country do so because they simply have little no chance of getting an attractive woman in their own country.

So all of a sudden geekazoid jim bob pops up with a wife who looks like sofia vergara.  Suppose they live in nyc or miami, cities that are full of young, handsome, well paid latino men.  What do you think is going to happen?  Of course if you live in des moines iowa you might not have the same problem.  Of course the young handsome gringos are a threat too but nowhere near as much as latino men, at least in the short term.

[stnmasn]

Awesome ,,,,in contemplating what i wrote i realized that much of what I wrote  was naive, and that i had put out an impulsive post…..not good…


You have broke it down for me nicely,,,gracias


i dont agree with it but i suppose if i was a geekazoid then I may have a different outlook

[Elexpatriado]

It's an attitude you take when you picked the wrong woman and you are insecure. Same issue with a relacion de Lejos..when she is back in Colombia (say) and you are somewhere overseas applying for her visa (or working your ass off to support her and her family ) and you have  ignored the warning signs (red flags), thought with your little head instead of the big one, tried to be "Capn Salva Puta" ( like the George Bernard Shaw book "pygmalion"),..if you picked the wrong woman, or flew down and proposed to her 2 weeks after meeting her, don't communicate, dont nurture the relationship...you have somehing to worry about..DEFINITELY ...and you would have been better off cutting her loose after the 4th or 5th date rather than keeping her locked up in the chicken coop on the ranch in Moose-Dick Falls Idaho..
 

Awesome tu no puedes hablar en serio…."many gringos would like to keep his foreign wife as far away as possible from her own people once she's in the US"   


is that quote for real? is it true? I can't believe it. How selfish and lame a thing to do to someone that the person supposedly "loves"…….i had the opposite approach. I didn't want her to feel so alone so i encouraged her associating worth other people from her culture.


wow the poor girls who are kept from their gente  que triste. 


Is that statement true Awesome or are you just assuming?


Is there anybody here that can give input as to whether this attitude of keeping your foreign bride isolated from her "own people" is a real thing or just imagined.


WOW what a lame approach to making a loving relationship last for the long term…"keep her away from what she knows and loves"…her culture


you can't be for real Awesome

[benjio]

Well let's break it down for you there stnmsn.  I think we all agree that ALL women who sign up on these gringo dating websites and agencies are first and foremost looking to improve their situation by finding a "rich gringo".  Finding true love is second place, and for most it's a far second place.

I agree with you and have expressed as much on several occasions. 99.9% of the foreign women actively looking to date gringos are first and foremost searching for a better quality of life. If true love is a subsequent result of a relationship with a foreigner I would go as far as calling it pure coincidence in most cases. What I don't agree with is the idea that if a gringo tries to prevent her from mingling with people from her own culture, or working, or studying at a university, that's somehow going to save him from losing a foreign woman that only wanted to improve her circumstances in the first place. Go ahead and lock her up and throw away the key. Make her wear an abaya everytime you take her to the grocery store. It just isn't realistic in the United States or any other modern country. And I also think it's counterproductive to maintaining a healthy relationship. There are only three things that are going to keep a woman with you in any civilized Western Culture. She's in love with you. Because of her cultural upbringing she absolutely refuses to get a divorce; or she's sticking around because you have children and the stability of her family is much more important to her than her happiness. In any other circumstance you're just biding your time.
 
So I say let her do what makes her happy if it's within reason. If she cheats, or leaves or both, she was probably eventually going to do it anyway. In a country like the U.S., Canada, etc. it's only a matter of time before any woman figures out she has the upperhand if she wants to leave you. She doesn't have to be involved with the local culture club to figure that out. She can do that looking at television for a couple of weeks. The more oppressive you are during the marriage, the more vindictive she may be during the split. Let's not forget...push comes to shove, she can always just say you are abusive to her and/or the kids and have your ass put in jail while she still has access to your accounts and a "Stay in the U.S. no questions ask" card.

[Elexpatriado]

 
Thats why you go after the ones who are 7 or 8 out of 10, have a job, profession, makes good cash, maybe 1 kid, are intelegent,dont want to leave Colombia, are interested in  and have dated men from their own country,or maybe other Latin Countries.. you spend time in Colombia, get to know her, have regulator dates..
 
Rather than going after some desparate  grilla barrio girl with fake boobs and ass, used to have belly worms until she sucked in some  stupid gringo to pay for her medicine, who doesnt mind going with you to Moose -Dick Iowa, until she hits the pavement upon which she takes the next train to her old  boy freind in Bronx (maybe possibly waiting til she has her immigrant staus, but avoiding sex with you as much as possible in the interrum).
 
 

Well let's break it down for you there stnmsn.  I think we all agree that ALL women who sign up on these gringo dating websites and agencies are first and foremost looking to improve their situation by finding a "rich gringo".  Finding true love is second place, and for most it's a far second place.

Most if not all men who search for a wife from a poor country do so because they simply have little no chance of getting an attractive woman in their own country.

So all of a sudden geekazoid jim bob pops up with a wife who looks like sofia vergara.  Suppose they live in nyc or miami, cities that are full of young, handsome, well paid latino men.  What do you think is going to happen?  Of course if you live in des moines iowa you might not have the same problem.  Of course the young handsome gringos are a threat too but nowhere near as much as latino men, at least in the short term.

[Elexpatriado]

And as i said before, not all of the women on the dating sites are after North Americans or even foreigners...the dating agencies, yes,(although I have seen Mexicans, Chileans, Argiess there as well) sites like Colombian Cupid, LAC, no, not necessarily..

[Elexpatriado]

And also, a lot of these women go to the agencies out of curiosity, not necesarily because they are desperate to leave the country...or do a lot of gold digging..
 

And as i said before, not all of the women on the dating sites are after North Americans or even foreigners...the dating agencies, yes,(although I have seen Mexicans, Chileans, Argiess there as well) sites like Colombian Cupid, LAC, no, not necessarily..

[Hector_Lavoe]

I dont agree and yet I do agree. The Peanuts you pay for those sites ($15 a month or something)is nothing and not a deterent in itself compared to the time you spend corresponding with them, flying down  there, meeting them, paying for dates.
 
However $15 a month is a lot for some of them, and even if it was 10,000 COP for them, you would have far lesss chicas there.
 

Yes, I wasn't complaining about the financial cost of LAC (which is cheap) just the time and effort to get to a good prospect. But you are right that is nothing compared to actually flying down there for mupltiple trips. But if a guy is doing that it is because he supposedly found a keeper.
 
The foreign-based dating websites (like LAC and CC) are free for the ladies. Only the guys get charged.

[Researcher]

Thats why you go after the ones who are 7 or 8 out of 10, have a job, profession, makes good cash, maybe 1 kid, are intelegent,dont want to leave Colombia, are interested in  and have dated men from their own country,or maybe other Latin Countries.. you spend time in Colombia, get to know her, have regulator dates..
 
Rather than going after some desparate  grilla barrio girl with fake boobs and ass, used to have belly worms until she sucked in some  stupid gringo to pay for her medicine, who doesnt mind going with you to Moose -Dick Iowa, until she hits the pavement upon which she takes the next train to her old  boy freind in Bronx (maybe possibly waiting til she has her immigrant staus, but avoiding sex with you as much as possible in the interrum).

Hmmm,a lot of details in that example. Sounds like it could be a true story in there somewhere....belly worms and all.

[Elexpatriado]

 
Consider it a compilation of several true stories...and there are many more, much crazier...
 
 

Hmmm,a lot of details in that example. Sounds like it could be a true story in there somewhere....belly worms and all.

[robert angel]

I agree with you and have expressed as much on several occasions. 99.9% of the foreign women actively looking to date gringos are first and foremost searching for a better quality of life. If true love is a subsequent result of a relationship with a foreigner I would go as far as calling it pure coincidence in most cases. . There are only three things that are going to What I don't agree with is the idea that if a gringo tries to prevent her from mingling with people from her own culture, or working, or studying at a university, that's somehow going to save him from losing a foreign woman that only wanted to improve her circumstances in the first place. Go ahead and lock her up and throw away the key. Make her wear an abaya everytime you take her to the grocery store. It just isn't realistic in the United States or any other modern country. And I also think it's counterproductive to maintaining a healthy relationshipkeep a woman with you in any civilized Western Culture. She's in love with you. Because of her cultural upbringing she absolutely refuses to get a divorce; or she's sticking around because you have children and the stability of her family is much more important to her than her happiness. In any other circumstance you're just biding your time.
 
So I say let her do what makes her happy if it's within reason. If she cheats, or leaves or both, she was probably eventually going to do it anyway. In a country like the U.S., Canada, etc. it's only a matter of time before any woman figures out she has the upperhand if she wants to leave you. She doesn't have to be involved with the local culture club to figure that out. She can do that looking at television for a couple of weeks. The more oppressive you are during the marriage, the more vindictive she may be during the split. Let's not forget...push comes to shove, she can always just say you are abusive to her and/or the kids and have your ass put in jail while she still has access to your accounts and a "Stay in the U.S. no questions ask" card.

A caged bird doesn't really sing. I don't want one either. I have things pretty good now--I should say 'we' and we talk fairly often in long terms, like moving to a big, more exciting city in the USA a few years down the road, spending more time at our home in her country, but I still, deep inside, take it one day at a time.



I hold no illusion that this is forever.  While she asks my permission to go almost anywhere or do almost anything, she knows 95% of the time I'll agree--I know at this time she has good judgment--her asking merely reflects her traditions and shows respect. That can change--she could become unhappy. Nothing is perfect or constant and people change everyday. One of my biggest mistakes was holding onto my first marriage, long after it was toast. I thought to myself--"The kids--I need to do it for the kids"--Actually it would've been better for the kids had we split sooner.


If it doesn't work out this time, or anytime, once it's clear that it's not going to work, I'd rather end it sooner than drag it out, which only causes more misery.


There's a reason why in a number of nations, the number of marriages have plummeted. In Scandinavian nations, marriage is increasingly uncommon and according to the below info, 4 out of the 5 nations with the least amount of singles who marry are in S. America, interestingly enough.

http://www.skyscanner.net/news/world-s-most-single-people-find-love-these-low-marriage-locations

[Hector_Lavoe]

I agree with you and have expressed as much on several occasions. 99.9% of the foreign women actively looking to date gringos are first and foremost searching for a better quality of life. If true love is a subsequent result of a relationship with a foreigner I would go as far as calling it pure coincidence in most cases. What I don't agree with is the idea that if a gringo tries to prevent her from mingling with people from her own culture, or working, or studying at a university, that's somehow going to save him from losing a foreign woman that only wanted to improve her circumstances in the first place. Go ahead and lock her up and throw away the key. Make her wear an abaya everytime you take her to the grocery store. It just isn't realistic in the United States or any other modern country. And I also think it's counterproductive to maintaining a healthy relationship. There are only three things that are going to keep a woman with you in any civilized Western Culture. She's in love with you. Because of her cultural upbringing she absolutely refuses to get a divorce; or she's sticking around because you have children and the stability of her family is much more important to her than her happiness. In any other circumstance you're just biding your time.
 

Benjio:  Yes, I can't disgree with your statement that the vast majority of these ladies who are actively looking for a foreign husband are seeking a better quality of life. But I would add that IF a guy picks a woman who is reasonably within his league the chances for success go up. In other words, the overweight social misfit looking for a 9 or 10 is destined for failure while a resonably attractive, socially adept and stable gringo who sticks to women within his "weight" class has a decent shot of success or even "real" love. 
 
 

 There are only three things that are going to keep a woman with you in any civilized Western Culture. She's in love with you. Because of her cultural upbringing she absolutely refuses to get a divorce; or she's sticking around because you have children and the stability of her family is much more important to her than her happiness. In any other circumstance you're just biding your time. 

I think "stability" does equate to happiness for the woman involved. Forget about kids for a moment. I have met plenty of ladies in Latin America with no kids and decent careers make the statement that "stability" is what they are looking for.  That is, they don't want a guy who is running around on them with other ladies and yes they want a guy with whom they can build a stable household.  I think that is something most women in the world want.

[fathertime]

 . There are only three things that are going to keep a woman with you in any civilized Western Culture. She's in love with you. Because of her cultural upbringing she absolutely refuses to get a divorce; or she's sticking around because you have children and the stability of her family is much more important to her than her happiness. In any other circumstance you're just biding your time.
 

I think you covered a lot of reasons why women stay with men generally (although I can think of more)...do you feel there is any additional reasons why an american woman would stay with an american man? 


I think the earlier mentioned 99.9% figure is a bit exaggerated..I really do...but alas what difference does it make if the 2 spouses are happy enough.




Good luck with your lady Benjio and may she be in the .01%!


Fathertime! 

[fathertime]

A caged bird doesn't really sing. I don't want one either. I have things pretty good now--I should say 'we' and we talk fairly often in long terms, like moving to a big, more exciting city in the USA a few years down the road, spending more time at our home in her country, but I still, deep inside, take it one day at a time.



I hold no illusion that this is forever.  While she asks my permission to go almost anywhere or do almost anything, she knows 95% of the time I'll agree--I know at this time she has good judgment--her asking merely reflects her traditions and shows respect. That can change--she could become unhappy. Nothing is perfect or constant and people change everyday. One of my biggest mistakes was holding onto my first marriage, long after it was toast. I thought to myself--"The kids--I need to do it for the kids"--Actually it would've been better for the kids had we split sooner.


If it doesn't work out this time, or anytime, once it's clear that it's not going to work, I'd rather end it sooner than drag it out, which only causes more misery.


There's a reason why in a number of nations, the number of marriages have plummeted. In Scandinavian nations, marriage is increasingly uncommon and according to the below info, 4 out of the 5 nations with the least amount of singles who marry are in S. America, interestingly enough.

http://www.skyscanner.net/news/world-s-most-single-people-find-love-these-low-marriage-locations

Well Robert A.  I think you have making the best of things in your marriage for quite some time, if your wife hasn't wanted to leave you by now...then I doubt she ever would, unless a serious attitude change occurs. 
Good luck!


Fathertime! 

[benjio]

do you feel there is any additional reasons why an american woman would stay with an american man? 

One could probably think of more reasons but in the end I think it all ties back to true love, a stern belief in the ideal that marriage is a lifelong commitment, the stability of having a family or the combination of all or any of the three.
 

I think the earlier mentioned 99.9% figure is a bit exaggerated..I really do...but alas what difference does it make if the 2 spouses are happy enough.

Perhaps...statistics like that obviously aren't based on any kind of real data. They do however represent a strong belief. Look at it from the other side. I would go as far as saying that the primary motivation for 99.9% of men that wife hunt in foreign countries is because they can date much more attractive women than they can where they come from. It's definitely not the only reason, just like in the case of the ladies; and I think there are countless cases of those alterior motives being transformed into loving relationships over time. But at first, it just is what it is.

Good luck with your lady Benjio and may she be in the .01%!

Thanks and Happy Holidays to you and yours!

[JWR]

Whenever I hear the word "let" I just chuckle to myself.  When I hear, "I let my wife work", or "I let my wife go back to school", or any other reference to her having to ask for permission to do anything, I just have to laugh.
 
Control is only an illusion with these adult women that just happen to be married to an American guy.  Any guy who thinks that he has any control at all in these relationships, is going to get a surprise down the road.  These women are simply going to do whatever they wish.  It may be with the guy while they are married, or they will wait a bit, and start doing whatever they want after the divorce.
 
After a couple years of marriage the power imbalance equalizes, and these marriages aren't much different then any other marriage.  Two people compromising and getting long.  If the power imbalance doesn't equalize, the girl will surely hit the road with time in my opinion.  It may take a while til she is independent enough to make it on her own but if a guy is controlling, she's leaving.  I think some guys like the power imbalance of the first year, and have a hard time letting their wife become independent.  Truth is, that it's going to happen with, or without them.
 
It's nice that Robert's wife out of respect, asks for permission to do things, but I'm sure she knows that she is really the one who is in control in her own way.  A nice way of showing compromise.
 
 

[mambocowboy]

I agree with you and have expressed as much on several occasions. 99.9% of the foreign women actively looking to date gringos are first and foremost searching for a better quality of life. If true love is a subsequent result of a relationship with a foreigner I would go as far as calling it pure coincidence in most cases. What I don't agree with is the idea that if a gringo tries to prevent her from mingling with people from her own culture, or working, or studying at a university, that's somehow going to save him from losing a foreign woman that only wanted to improve her circumstances in the first place. Go ahead and lock her up and throw away the key. Make her wear an abaya everytime you take her to the grocery store. It just isn't realistic in the United States or any other modern country. And I also think it's counterproductive to maintaining a healthy relationship. There are only three things that are going to keep a woman with you in any civilized Western Culture. She's in love with you. Because of her cultural upbringing she absolutely refuses to get a divorce; or she's sticking around because you have children and the stability of her family is much more important to her than her happiness. In any other circumstance you're just biding your time.
 
So I say let her do what makes her happy if it's within reason. If she cheats, or leaves or both, she was probably eventually going to do it anyway. In a country like the U.S., Canada, etc. it's only a matter of time before any woman figures out she has the upperhand if she wants to leave you. She doesn't have to be involved with the local culture club to figure that out. She can do that looking at television for a couple of weeks. The more oppressive you are during the marriage, the more vindictive she may be during the split. Let's not forget...push comes to shove, she can always just say you are abusive to her and/or the kids and have your ass put in jail while she still has access to your accounts and a "Stay in the U.S. no questions ask" card.

Using my own marriage as a frame of reference, I'd say my wife falls in the category of women who were looking for improved quality of life AND a loving husband who she could also love. My wife did choose me over gringos much wealthier than me. One guy sent $2000 without her asking and without him ever visiting, and he wasn't the only one. According to her, there were  other wealthy gringos also sending money without her requesting any; I , on the other hand, never sent any dough other than money related to us succeeding in getting the K1...

[benjio]

Using my own marriage as a frame of reference, I'd say my wife falls in the category of women who were looking for improved quality of life AND a loving husband who she could also love. My wife did choose me over gringos much wealthier than me. One guy sent $2000 without her asking and without him ever visiting, and he wasn't the only one.

I've never been sure why guys do that. It may get the chicas attention at first but they completely lose respect for you in the long run. When a girl isn't interested in money and it's being offered to her voluntarily the first thing she thinks is "guy with no self confidence with nothing else to offer but his bank roll trying to buy me." A lot of girls will outright refuse to take money. While others will say "no" at first, then after a conversation with their friends telling them how dumb they are, accept it and eventually ask for more. The worse kind will milk that cow until it's dry. Regardless, when guys kick off a relationship like that as soon as the money train stops, she'll usually stop answering your calls as well.

[Researcher]

Consider it a compilation of several true stories...and there are many more, much crazier...

I have heard many of those myself. I also witnessed some things similar to those. Live and learn.

[Elexpatriado]

Thats the funniest thing I ever heard. And I thought I was a Bobo. Did she actually accept this "free" money?  You dont have to answer if you dont want to.
 

Using my own marriage as a frame of reference, I'd say my wife falls in the category of women who were looking for improved quality of life AND a loving husband who she could also love. My wife did choose me over gringos much wealthier than me. One guy sent $2000 without her asking and without him ever visiting, and he wasn't the only one. According to her, there were  other wealthy gringos also sending money without her requesting any; I , on the other hand, never sent any dough other than money related to us succeeding in getting the K1...