So you found her, now what?

[Stevieboy]

I have no clue on the visa process outside of googling it. I've read good and bad from guys here marrying and have assumed to go for the fiance visa instead of just the visitor visa". I don't want to sound like another guy who has follishly fallen head over heals. I've been talking to two women on skype on a daily basis who know they're competing for me. MC advised I should be straight forward with the ladies by disclosing that I'm courting and will be dating other women when I visit. That was spot on, infact they said they don't blame me and it makes sense. But what happened after that, is they upped their A game and fast forwarded the pre-dating rituals to light years ahead. Our conversations are straight up. I ask all the difficult questions a man would be afraid to ask to a westernized woman. Like, i talk about how I don't give no "papaya" and that in my country the parents and family members are secondary to ours after marriage and should not expect financial gain. I also bring up prenuptuals. They're totally cool with all that. Once they know my true intentions and what I expect of her, they know then, if  I'M what they're looking for. They also don't consider me a "gringo" as much as they consider me a mexican living in the USA. It's true that these women don't respect a feminine man. They like a man that takes control yet is not machista in the colombian male sense. They absolutely love pillow talk, and when I speak to them romantically and tell them how smart and pretty they are. (Oh yeah, they're both educated.) Once the banter of family, romance and sexual tension got started, they now call me daily. I told one of the girsl she shouldnt call me because it might be too expensive for her, and she didnt care, she "just wanted to hear my voice". So, these two women are the candidates I have chosen out of speaking and skyping to 5 others. We talk daily and sometimes more than once.
.
I'm still hanging out with Benjio and the girls he knows (I'm no fool) before the two girls know I'm there. They think I'm going a couple days later than the actual date.
.
I'm a pre-planner and if I fall for one of these gals, both she and I are gonna want to see eachother again right away. What steps and visas do you guys recommend? Side note: Both these women live with their families, but are independent of them. One of them lives only with her sister. It doesnt appear that the drawn out courting rituals and continuous travels are necessary.  My thought was "go for it" and do the fiance visa, and if she doesnt work out, send her back, but I dont know how long or much that costs compared maybe a student visa, and while she was here start up the fiance visa.
.
BTW, I'd like to thank whomever started the PL site. It is invaluable.
 
 

[fathertime]

seems like you are doing the right things for now stevieboy...i say why not hang out with benjio if he can introduce you to some other babes...webcamming is fun but no need to get too into any one gal at this point...you know a lot of guys realize sewing some oats for a minute while dating is a part of the process...doesn't have to be, but seems reasonable enough to me.  you seem like the type of guy that is going to have a great time with this who thing and ultimately wind up with a colombian babe in the end, whether it be the 1st trip or the 10th.

.
I'm a pre-planner and if I fall for one of these gals, both she and I are gonna want to see eachother again right away. What steps and visas do you guys recommend? Side note: Both these women live with their families, but are independent of them. One of them lives only with her sister. It doesnt appear that the drawn out courting rituals and continuous travels are necessary.  My thought was "go for it" and do the fiance visa, and if she doesnt work out, send her back, but I dont know how long or much that costs compared maybe a student visa, and while she was here start up the fiance visa.
.

i had a similar attitude but try to resist at least for a minute, unless you really really feel good about the woman.  a little perspective is good...i can recall my 1st trip and i was prepared to fall for an incredibly cute young woman that i took out several times, i'm glad i slapped myself and kept my eyes open cause it would have not worked...and then 10 minutes later another woman came into the picture...then another....options are limitless so perspective is good.






Fathertime!   

[Stevieboy]

seems like you are doing the right things for now stevieboy...i say why not hang out with benjio if he can introduce you to some other babes...webcamming is fun but no need to get too into any one gal at this point...you know a lot of guys realize sewing some oats for a minute while dating is a part of the process...doesn't have to be, but seems reasonable enough to me.  you seem like the type of guy that is going to have a great time with this who thing and ultimately wind up with a colombian babe in the end, whether it be the 1st trip or the 10th.



i had a similar attitude but try to resist at least for a minute, unless you really really feel good about the woman.  a little perspective is good...i can recall my 1st trip and i was prepared to fall for an incredibly cute young woman that i took out several times, i'm glad i slapped myself and kept my eyes open cause it would have not worked...and then 10 minutes later another woman came into the picture...then another....options are limitless so perspective is good.






Fathertime!

As for sewing my oats, I've done that throughout life. I've been single and partied most of it. I also was with a couple of Colombianas in Panama too last month (did you see the pics?). That was fun.  I do plan to have fun with Benjio's friends too, but I'm talking about the women I'm speaking to now. I'm very picky and skeptical of women, hence single for so long, and these two women fit all the criteria of not just what I want, but what I need. As an example of skepticism, I was looking for a Chevy suburban 3 years ago and found the right color, price and interior that I wanted. The salesman said it wouldn't last long, and my usual skepticism kicked in, and I didnt buy it thinking it would be there next week. When I came back to haggle the next week, it was sold. I settled for an older suburban that I liked less. Know what I mean? So, yeah, there's ALWAYS gonna be available chicas in Colombia, but the right make and model might not be. So, with that, what visa is the safest one all around?   
 
The reason I say let's get the visa going, is that I'd rather see the woman in action here in the US where the real scenario is. Instead of spending money on several trips, why not just bring her here and save money? If she doesnt work out, send her back.   

[mambocowboy]

My thought was "go for it" and do the fiance visa, and if she doesnt work out, send her back, but I dont know how long or much that costs compared maybe a student visa, and while she was here start up the fiance visa.
.

 
 

WHOA, StevieBoy, you gotta visit first to do the fiancee K1 Visa. If I'm understanding you correctly, you want to bring her here without meeting in person first? Not gonna happen.... To be approved for the K1 you'll have to show "proof of a relationship," the most important of which are photos. You'll also want to save other evidence including emails, receipt for an engagement ring, hotel receipts, airline receipts, etc...After you've visited her and want to do the Visa, Visajourney.com has excellent advice and even guides to each of the Visas. I used that and it worked. Some guys also use attorneys, but I didn't feel that was necessary...

[benjio]

I agree with FT 100% on this one. Calm down and enjoy yourself first Stevie. Every prospect you think you have may very well wash out your first two days there. Ive actually seen that happen more often than not. You can't start drawing up blueprints for a house you plan to build before buying the land to figure out how much acreage you're working with.

[whitey]

It doesnt appear that the drawn out courting rituals and continuous travels are necessary.  My thought was "go for it" and do the fiance visa, and if she doesnt work out, send her back, but I dont know how long or much that costs compared maybe a student visa, and while she was here start up the fiance visa.

Stevieboy, a woman isn't a piece of furniture you bring home, and if it doesn't work with your decor, send it back to the store.  You wouldn't even treat a dog that way.

This is a person, a woman, who will be in love enough with you to change her life, leave her country, leave her family, leave her friends, leave her job ... for you.  Try to imagine yourself in the same situation and imagine how you would want to be treated.


Travelling to Colombia should be fun, not a chore.  Getting to know her country, the culture, her city, friends and family.  I've spent some of the best times of my life there and always look forward to going back.  Take as much time as you can, and enjoy it!

[Stevieboy]

My thought was "go for it" and do the fiance visa, and if she doesnt work out, send her back, but I dont know how long or much that costs compared maybe a student visa, and while she was here start up the fiance visa.
.

 
 

WHOA, StevieBoy, you gotta visit first to do the fiancee K1 Visa. If I'm understanding you correctly, you want to bring her here without meeting in person first? Not gonna happen.... To be approved for the K1 you'll have to show "proof of a relationship," the most important of which are photos. You'll also want to save other evidence including emails, receipt for an engagement ring, hotel receipts, airline receipts, etc...After you've visited her and want to do the Visa, Visajourney.com has excellent advice and even guides to each of the Visas. I used that and it worked. Some guys also use attorneys, but I didn't feel that was necessary...

NO, NO. I never said bring her here before meeting her.  Of course I'm going to meet her and very well spend time with her.  You're first sentence is what I wanted to know, but don't know the process or costs.
@Benjio. Of course it may wash out within the visit. That can happen anywhere on the planet. You're analogy with the blueprints and land didn't make sense to me, but I know what you're trying to say.
I don't get it guys, I thought that was the whole purpose of going? Is it just to get laid?  I can do that anywhere for a lot cheaper. Is the successful relationship ratio that low? I'm not gullible, and can speak the language. Contrary what some people might think, their culture isn't that much different than mine (mexicanwise).   
.
So, you're saying, if I communicate with a woman on the phone and video over a month, then visit her and her family, have sex, spend a week with her maybe more, and if she's the right one, DONT pull the trigger yet? Go out with more girls? I dont have that kind of time and money to be playing around. If I have to go out with several women and make several visits to find the right one, that says a lot about colombian women. Not good.

[Stevieboy]

Stevieboy, a woman isn't a piece of furniture you bring home, and if it doesn't work with your decor, send it back to the store.  You wouldn't even treat a dog that way.

This is a person, a woman, who will be in love enough with you to change her life, leave her country, leave her family, leave her friends, leave her job ... for you.  Try to imagine yourself in the same situation and imagine how you would want to be treated.


Travelling to Colombia should be fun, not a chore.  Getting to know her country, the culture, her city, friends and family.  I've spent some of the best times of my life there and always look forward to going back.  Take as much time as you can, and enjoy it!

This is why I think many guys just read the posts instead of attending; misunderstanding of what one writes. You also didn't read my post fully. if you did, you would'nt have assumed I treat or regard women this way.
.
Is this gonna be another thread where the main question is not the subject matter?
 

[fathertime]

I didn't want to discourage you stevie, if anything I wanted to encourage you. 


I did not realize you had already been abroad (panama) so that being the case if you feel you are prepared to potentially settle down with a woman without feeling the tug of a full blown erection for all the other babes, then that changes things. 


It still seems to make sense to meet Benjio's gals, and see what is out there a little bit.  If indeed you like one of your webcam gals the most then by all means take it to the next level.  I don't know that the next step is engagement/marriage though.  Now if indeed $$ is a little tight for you, then that does have to be factored in and yes I can see pulling the trigger on an engagement quicker, riskier but that may be the only way you get er done.  This whole finding/supporting a wife thing is rather expensive though, so hopefully you don't have too much pressure with shortages of money!




Regarding visas i'm no expert, but it seems like the fiance visa is the way to go (if you find a special gal)...i don't know the timeline for a student visa, but i suspect it isn't short and probably complicated.  The tourist visa has a pretty high likelihood of being denied which could mean you start another visa right from the start, but it is your time. 


Good luck,
Fathertime! 

[robert angel]

I have no clue on the visa process outside of googling it. I've read good and bad from guys here marrying and have assumed to go for the fiance visa instead of just the visitor visa". I don't want to sound like another guy who has follishly fallen head over heals. I've been talking to two women on skype on a daily basis who know they're competing for me. MC advised I should be straight forward with the ladies by disclosing that I'm courting and will be dating other women when I visit. That was spot on, infact they said they don't blame me and it makes sense. But what happened after that, is they upped their A game and fast forwarded the pre-dating rituals to light years ahead. Our conversations are straight up. I ask all the difficult questions a man would be afraid to ask to a westernized woman. Like, i talk about how I don't give no "papaya" and that in my country the parents and family members are secondary to ours after marriage and should not expect financial gain. I also bring up prenuptuals. They're totally cool with all that. Once they know my true intentions and what I expect of her, they know then, if  I'M what they're looking for. They also don't consider me a "gringo" as much as they consider me a mexican living in the USA. It's true that these women don't respect a feminine man. They like a man that takes control yet is not machista in the colombian male sense. They absolutely love pillow talk, and when I speak to them romantically and tell them how smart and pretty they are. (Oh yeah, they're both educated.) Once the banter of family, romance and sexual tension got started, they now call me daily. I told one of the girsl she shouldnt call me because it might be too expensive for her, and she didnt care, she "just wanted to hear my voice". So, these two women are the candidates I have chosen out of speaking and skyping to 5 others. We talk daily and sometimes more than once.
.
I'm still hanging out with Benjio and the girls he knows (I'm no fool) before the two girls know I'm there. They think I'm going a couple days later than the actual date.
.
I'm a pre-planner and if I fall for one of these gals, both she and I are gonna want to see eachother again right away. What steps and visas do you guys recommend? Side note: Both these women live with their families, but are independent of them. One of them lives only with her sister. It doesnt appear that the drawn out courting rituals and continuous travels are necessary.  My thought was "go for it" and do the fiance visa, and if she doesnt work out, send her back, but I dont know how long or much that costs compared maybe a student visa, and while she was here start up the fiance visa.
.
BTW, I'd like to thank whomever started the PL site. It is invaluable.

 
I think even more 'preplanning' ought to be involved, especially with the thought of bringing a gal over on a visa. At the same time an attitude that you're just going to 'roll with it' and see what comes w/o geting too committal minded so soon might be wise. If she's worth the effort, she'll surely wait for you to come back and see her in a reasonable amount of time. In that amount of time, if there are 'red flags; you might see them. No, don't lose a golden opportunity, but it sounds like you really want to bag a cat on this trip and you may be going a bit fast.

 
Are these two women gals you've met before or are they women you're planning to meet with personally for the first time--how long have you known them?

 
As for:

 
""I'm still hanging out with Benjio and the girls he knows (I'm no fool) before the two girls know I'm there. They think I'm going a couple days later than the actual date.""

 
That may be a little tricky--If that's your plan, I'd advise you take your passport, plane tickets and telephone with you to the bathroom every time you go. Also have the hotel front desk keep your messages on the QT. Before I committed, I tried to do so, only to find out some women had 'contacts' in the hotel that I wasn't aware of. Don't underestimate these women--if they're that dumb, you probably don't want them. You say you're being upfront about these two being, I guess 'final contestants' againt one another--but if they feel they're being 'played', it may be more of a game than you bargained for. There's 'plenty of fish' to be had, but the best ones are typically harder to land and keep.

 
Even if you decide on one and can get her here stateside after just knowing her a short while, her experience and the behavior of both of you also will still be the 'honey moon' period and probably not long enough to show what each other's true colors are actually like. Already, you have two dames who are knowingly competing against each other for you and that skews things for them and in turn for you. Sounds a bit like a reality show to me.
 
Sometimes we want to "Have our cake and eat it too" and the dish doesn't turn out as well as we'd like.

 
Speaking of planning, you mention prenuptual. I'm assuming that means a prenuptual agreement. In a lot of states, they're not worth a jar of warm spit. It's not unusual for guys to plan the eventuality--the 'possibility' of a divorce even before the wedding occurs. That said, and thinking of my sons, about twenty years of home equity and retirement accounts, I spoke to several attorneys in my state before I wed.
 
They emphatically told me they were not only a waste of time and money, but that they can backfire badly. Before you wed, it's generally good to buy a  more expensive house and cars if that's in the plans for later, to look at your assets and how they're arranged, etc. A trusted family member holding control, having assetts designated for children if you have any--these and other ways are available. Still, anything you aquire after you wed, including liquid assetts, may be fair game for division should you divorce after marriage, pre nup or no.

 
If after consulting more than one lawyer, if you decide to go for a prenupt down the line, be positive that it is transcribed into her language --it might be wise to not only read it visually, but have it read TO her before she signs and it's legally notarized. Judges have a lot of descretion on enforcing them and if worse comes to worse, it'll cost you extra legally to get a pre nupt enforced. Sometimes the judge will take a stance all the same, where screw the prenup---he/she feels you took advantage of the poor woman, coercing her into signing a prenup and then they'll fry you. States and even areas of states vary. I was divorced once and if I'd lived 4 miles away, in the next county, those bible thumpers would've sent me to the cleaners.

 
Not trying to rain on your parade here and not painting you as dumb, but sometimes a guy from the outside looking in and playing 'devil's advocate' can be sobering and useful.

 
The coffee's so damn good down there, why not slow down a bit and enjoy it?

[Stevieboy]

FT and Angel, Good wisdom.
Yeah I preplan. Just got off the phone with Benjio and he expalained the experience of cost, time and red tape involved with the visas. 9- 12 months is a long time. Much can happen to a relationship in that amount of time. I just wanted to know "what happens when you find her". Looks as though Colombia will definitely be part of a business plan if I'm going down that road.       
 

[whitey]

This is why I think many guys just read the posts instead of attending; misunderstanding of what one writes. You also didn't read my post fully. if you did, you would'nt have assumed I treat or regard women this way.
.
Is this gonna be another thread where the main question is not the subject matter?

Stevieboy, what you actually wrote as the concluding sentences of your concluding paragraph were:

It doesnt appear that the drawn out courting rituals and continuous travels are necessary.  My thought was "go for it" and do the fiance visa, and if she doesnt work out, send her back, but I dont know how long or much that costs compared maybe a student visa, and while she was here start up the fiance visa.

It seems pretty clear to me, but if what you actually meant was something more like the opposite ... something like you understand the gravity of what you're doing, and what you would be asking of the woman, I'm prepared to believe you if that's what you're saying now.

I agree with you that all too often the tone of the discourse around here isn't respectful and turns off potential posters.  I don't think my post crossed over that line, but that's up to each person to interpret for themselves. 

No one is going to get total agreement and a pat on the back for everything they post, myself included as we've just witnessed ... simply validating whatever one says without offering any other viewpoint or information wouldn't make this place very useful. 

[robert angel]

A lot of us have thought we did a lot of 'sufficient' pre planning. Fact is that once we get out of our hometown environment and are in some exotic locale, with even more exotic looking women wildly--err, I mean 'widely'- available, we are often like kids in a candy store, not thinking as logically as we think we are. It's intoxicating--we feel like rock stars.

 
I spent a fair amount of time (years) on-line in chat and in some match making sites and I guess I developed a rep as a good guy and as a 'catch'. Word got out once about what hotel I was staying at overseas and I actually had women (some more aptly labled 'girls') camping out in the hotel lobby. One guy's dream is another's nightmare. Some even brought their Mothers along from far away to try and meet me.

 
Any girl worth sticking around with is going to be, shall we say 'inquisitive'? They will probe and search about the 'competition'--about who they were, why they didn't last, who might be in the picture now and where they all are at the moment.

 
As much honey as there is all around, no wonder we all too often end up quickly sticking our dick in a bee hive and ruining situations all around. There were some sweet ladies in the bunch, but I couldn't get the best in that situation.

 
When I finally (took wayyyy too long) proposed to my now wife, she wouldn't stay overnight at my hotel.  She didn't want to make a bad impression on others--most importantly her family--she also has younger sisters. Never mind I'd known them for years. After a few weeks, a private, plain clothes detective from the hotel, who I didn't even know was there full time, cozied up to one of her four well educated, but strapping strong, farm raised brothers.

 
He said to him: "Your sister's BF is different than most Kanos--he could have many, many girls up in his room after he sent your sister home in the taxi after mid night!" On the other side of the coin, were hotel workers who pointed out hookers watching my every move from down the street and other available women both in and outside the hotel--including some very, very hot women, with many whom they'd had been happy to arrange a 'massage' for me--really whatever I desired.
 
Guys driving taxis would offer to make introductions to family members. If I were eating alone, waitstaff would sometimes do the same after striking up conversation and sizing me up. That's the Philippines for you--friendly and wide open in some aspects. Innocent, yet jaded in certain ways--paradoxical. Seen hookers get turned down and decide to attend church mass instead. Seen young people--virgins, who could talk very matter of factly about sex, but not 'go there.'

 
I'd walk around the neighborhood after mid night and the 'girls of the night' became friendly with my respectful non commital to their 'offers' --to the point where they told me they just wanted to "come up to my room for free, watch some TV, maybe order room service and enjoy the air conditioning." Yea right--I could've found myself sandwiched between 2 or 3 nubiles, fresh from the province, who just assumed I had to somehow know their cousin back in the USA. I still almost sweat at the memory! There were some mighty fine looking ladies and I'm still glad I've never gone that route, but I knew I had Filet Mignon waiting down the line!

 
Like the song says--You got to know when to hold em, know when to fold em, know when to walk away, know when to run! (As well as another--"The waiting is the hardest part")

 
And be careful what you wish for!

[Stevieboy]

 
 
He said to him: "Your sister's BF is different than most Kanos--he could have many, many girls up in his room after he sent your sister home in the taxi!" On the other side of the coin, were hotel workers who pointed out hookers and other available women in and outside the hotel--including some very, very hot women, with whom they'd had been happy to arrange a 'massage' for me--really whatever I desired.

 
 

What town was this? So, I take it when you visit several times, they know you and what you do by now. Not to mention everyone knows eachother.
.
Hey Whitey, was it you that recommended the corner room at El Prado? Couldn't find that post again. 
 

[whitey]

Hey Stevie ... it was room 202 ...


http://www.planet-love.com/index.php?topic=7429.msg106228#msg106228

[mambocowboy]

NO, NO. I never said bring her here before meeting her.  Of course I'm going to meet her and very well spend time with her.  You're first sentence is what I wanted to know, but don't know the process or costs.
@Benjio. Of course it may wash out within the visit. That can happen anywhere on the planet. You're analogy with the blueprints and land didn't make sense to me, but I know what you're trying to say.
I don't get it guys, I thought that was the whole purpose of going? Is it just to get laid?  I can do that anywhere for a lot cheaper. Is the successful relationship ratio that low? I'm not gullible, and can speak the language. Contrary what some people might think, their culture isn't that much different than mine (mexicanwise).   
.
So, you're saying, if I communicate with a woman on the phone and video over a month, then visit her and her family, have sex, spend a week with her maybe more, and if she's the right one, DONT pull the trigger yet? Go out with more girls? I dont have that kind of time and money to be playing around. If I have to go out with several women and make several visits to find the right one, that says a lot about colombian women. Not good.

After you get through with your trips to Colombia and the Visa processes (K1, permanent residency, removal of conditions), you'll have spent plenty of money....Then after you bring her here, you pay for English classes and other schooling so she can have/continue her career, not to mention living expenses for her, and you pay for her to go back and visit her family...This process is actually in some ways more challenging than marrying a gringa but ultimately potentially a heck of a lot more satisfying...

[Stevieboy]

After you get through with your trips to Colombia and the Visa processes (K1, permanent residency, removal of conditions), you'll have spent plenty of money....Then after you bring her here, you pay for English classes and other schooling so she can have/continue her career, not to mention living expenses for her, and you pay for her to go back and visit her family...This process is actually in some ways more challenging than marrying a gringa but ultimately potentially a heck of a lot more satisfying...

I'm already committed with plane tickets. I know i'll be addicted. Might as well just take the ride now. 

[Stevieboy]

Hey Stevie ... it was room 202 ...


http://www.planet-love.com/index.php?topic=7429.msg106228#msg106228

You also recommended waiting to pay for the hotel till I'm there. I havent paid, but am  little worried, they'll try to highball me at the counter knowing it's late at night and I'm jet lagged. 

[robert angel]

Stevieboy, I don't think it's your cup of tea----I think Makati's more your speed as it's never a dull moment, and although some say the prettiest women, like in Bangkok actually are guys, there's a lot of pretty 'real girls' working in offices there--as well as in night clubs.

 
But since you asked----

 
http://www.travelph.com/resorts/davao/
 

Davao City Philippines is actually about 1.5 million people now and during the day, it's about 2 million, with workers coming in. It feels much, much smaller though. It's not unusual to run into the same people around town. Much less crime and riff raff going on and about compared to most places, more people enjoying the malls, beaches and more--even the poor seem happier there than in other places. It seems like there's a million laughing people in the malls and hardly anyone buying a thing--weird, but not bad. I guess the free music and air conditioning is the draw .

 
If you're caught stealing (especially from tourists) or God forbid doing or dealing drugs a few times, the unofficially govt. endorsed vigilante squads will find you and typically in a not too populated area, shoot you dead, if you haven't left town after being 'asked' to do so already. They warn you clearly. So there's very little crime--we could probably leave our house unlocked. Cebu City is also doing this more and crime's gone down there too.

 
It's not a paranoid state--far, far from it--the people aren't overly worried about the crime or the terrorists that some other regions in distant parts of Mindano and some other parts of the Philippines have to deal with. No, Davao C. isn't totally immune from problems, but it's a helluva a lot safer feeling than other Philippine cities, not to mention Miami, NYC, or just typical medium sized US cities and towns. In the USA, we live in an area that has some homes that cost millions of dollars (not our home though) and people get robbed and shot dead all too frequently--pretty much weekly murders. Just outside of town, seems they bust a couple meth labs every week. Ah, 'the land of milk and honey'...

 
Most folks in Davao City are somewhat different than the residents of Cebu City and Manila, in that it's a more laid back, 'live and let live' sort of vibe, with a lot of gentle people who've moved to the city but haven't overwhelmed it. They have annexed huge amounts of surrounding land and spread the malls around, so it's not nearly as densely populated as most Asian cities. Not much of a 'rat race' and you don't see a lot of mongers hunting for girls, because things really arean't set up that way--in fact among mongers, it has a reputation as not being anywhere as hot as Manila, C.C. or Angeles City.

 
Davao City actually has a poor rep. as the Philippines goes for chasing easy girls, but a great rep. for finding a gem of a babe who's come to the city from the rural provinces to go to University and/or land a job. Lots of colleges, espec. for nurses, engineers, merchant mariners, teachers etc there, as well as a reputation for having some of the pretttiest girls nation wide. I'd guess Dumaguete City is a similar, but smaller version, a ferry ride away. Many of the women in Davao have a lot of Spanish blood in them and many dialects there have a lot of Spanish in them. My wife can follow quite  bit of Spanish naturally and says the women in Davao are taller than those in other areas of the Philippines, but I don't see it.

 
 
She wife came from the province a few hours out, finished a 5 year university Bachelors in Davao City, did her internship as a computer hardware and software engineer there for Coca Cola and I later stole her from Coca Cola Davao Logistical Engineering, after she became a 'regular' non contract employee--a major, major life accomplishment there.

 
There's a lot of poverty still, but you smell street food and fruit every where, music is every freaking place and the people seem so damn happy, with most of them finding things to smile and laugh about, that it almost annoys me--LOL.

 
If they had two beans left to their name, I think many people there would offer you one to eat before eating there's, then thank God for giving them the two beans. I think that instead, most americans would complain and pray for a big sack. Totally different mindset in terms of materialism, perception of time, weather and the value of loved ones.

 
Unlike mid town Cebu City, or Makati, Manila--where they have real red light districts, the game of finding a girl (good or bad) is different. Even the 'ladies of the night' quietly ply their trade while the health dept does its best to actively check and maintain public health, looking one way, while keeping an eye out for potential trouble with the other. I see more Europeans, Aussies, Japanese and Koreans than I do in other RP cities. So the bar scene's nothing like Manila or Cebu. Actually I've never been in a Filipino bar except for passing through the hotel bar once with my wife once to show her what she WASN'T missing.

 
I think that unlike Colombia, Davao City takes more 'setting up' if you're going just to look for a one night stand, as it doesn't have a big, clear red light district. Like anyplace, it also takes planning for finding real good 'wife material'. Guys can meet a ton of babes on line, on free and on for pay match making sites, facebook, craigslist etc and probably won't lack for company regardless, but while it's known as one of the Pearls of the Philippines, you won't find a pearl in every oyster....

 
That's how it's been the last ten or fifteen years. It's gotten a bit more expensive as the US dollar has taken a beating worldwide, but it's still about the least expensive cost of living wise among big Filipino cities. If it changes in terms of politics, economics and more (and that's entirely possible in today's world), so will our plans, but I hope we retire early, say in five or ten years overall. That said,  my wife wants to split our time here and there more and more evenly, whereas before it was more there than here.

[htown]

Good stuff stevieboy.  Keep us updated.   

[Bob_S]

This process is actually in some ways more challenging than marrying a gringa but ultimately potentially a heck of a lot more satisfying...

Amen, that.  This method is NOT easier and it is NOT cheaper.  But you do get more out of it (in terms of wife material) than if you just searched local.

[V_Man]

I'm a pre-planner and if I fall for one of these gals, both she and I are gonna want to see eachother again right away. What steps and visas do you guys recommend?

I am from a different country but these visas take a fair amount of time and effort. To say nothing of the difficulties she would have to travel to a foriegn country, culture and language while completely reliant on someone she is still getting to know.
Hence you will be travelling to see her in her country several times. That is what you should pre-plan for.

Embark on the visa process after you both have enough commitment to each other to make the effort and time a realistic excercise.

I also talked openly about many things before my first visit. In fact my first visit was really to test the chemistry and verify that everything we thought we knew about each other was real. I note of caution though. I don't think our experience is the norm.

[htown]

Oh yea stevieboy since you're deadset on colombianas as opposed to other latinas that can easily be found in texas, NYC and south Florida have very large colombian populations.


I see you seem to be in a hurry to get a chick over here to the us well you might as well forget about that.  It's going to be probably at least 1-2 years before one of your colombian sweethearts steps foot on us soil.  You might want to consider checking out the colombian areas in florida and new york, since they're already in the country you don't have to worry about any lengthy visa process.


Another thing to think about is find you a colombiana who already has a visa to come here.


You could also try puerto rico.  I'd bet puerto rican women might have the traditional values you're looking for and they don't need any visa to come.


We also have a large colombian population here in houston.  There are many colombian restaurants and night clubs here.  Ask benjio about the colombian festivals we have!!


Just throwing out a few random ideas for you.

[Ray]

A few points about visas Stevie…
　
When you find the one you want to marry and bring home, there are two choices of visa… Fiancée visa or Immigrant spouse visa. You might as well forget about student visas, tourist visas, and any other "short cuts".
　
You petition for a fiancée visa after you are both 100% committed to marriage. If you are thinking about bringing her here to see if things will work out, then sending her home if they don’t, that means you are not yet 100% committed and you are not yet ready to start the fiancée visa process.
　
The other option is to marry her over there and then file an immigrant visa petition.
　
Both visa types have pros and cons and neither is better than the other. You and your bride will have to determine which visa is best for your situation and then pursue that course of action.
　
Lots more detailed info in the "Immigration and Visas" section of this forum.
　
Ray
 

[Alabamaboy!]

No matter what kind of planning you do or visa you choose, you cannot predict what is going to happen when she hits the ground here. If neither of you have kids, there is no reason that you could not hang in there a while to see how things are going. I had a situation with kids involved and it was quite a mess for awhile. But now everything is smooth sailing.

While making a bunch of trips to Colombia, everything is easy and cool. But it is not reality. Only when they are here is the relationship for real.

You can have 100% made up your mind to marry her here in the States when you do the fiancee visa, but only a fool would go through with it if it is a disaster when she gets here.

One good thing if you get married there in Colombia, you can file for a spousal visa there and will help you if you want to do business there later.