Travel time too long, HELP

[Stevieboy]

Stevie, do you realise that a motel in Colombia has a totally different meaning than in our culture?

I didn't even know they had motels, however, the reason i used "Motel Hell" was because it was horror movie in the eighties about a hellish stay at a motel. 

[V_Man]

Well they have motels but it is not what you are thinking of.
In Colombia unmarried people live with their parents. They could be 30 or 40 and still living with their parents. Now this does not mean that they are less sexually active than in your country. So where do they go to have a little "adventure"?


In Colombia, a motel is rented by the hour. Often quite nice rooms. It may have a spa pool and a swinging harness in the corner.


Get the idea? 


It is not unusual at all.
This is just what everyone does. As in what couples do. Or more people, if you are into that.


It is called a motel because you drive there and back or you get a taxi so that no one can see you enter or leave. 


So don't go and book yourself into a motel and tell a lady on a first date that is where you are staying. On the other hand if your new love interest suggests you visit a motel, then your day is looking up. 

[Micky]

VM -

SB is going to be under the wing of BenJ.  It is like he is hooking up with Yoda de Barranquilla!


Micky

[benjio]

VM -

SB is going to be under the wing of BenJ.  It is like he is hooking up with Yoda de Barranquilla!


Micky

LOL!!! Thanks Mick, but I don't know about Yoda. Steve's primary motivation for traveling to Quilla is "entreprenueral" so I'm just putting him in contact with some folks I know that can help him out. If we happen to encounter a few single, attractive young ladies that admire our rugged good looks and boyish charm, it will be purely by coincidence.

[Flyboy777]

The woman I'm talking to and meeting in Medellin seems to love my facial hair and loves when I send photos of the short (albeit a bit gray) hair and my goatee.     I was surprised at this as well since I too had heard the women of Colombia (South America) in general don't like facial hair.


Kap

[Micky]

Kappy -

You actually are correct.  SA women GENERALLY do not like facial hair.  As you found out,  some do.  One of the great things of life,  one size does not fit all.


Micky

[braziliangirl]

Kappy -

You actually are correct.  SA women GENERALLY do not like facial hair.  As you found out,  some do.  One of the great things of life,  one size does not fit all.


Micky

Here in Brazil we have a movement called "Faça amor, não faça a barba" (kind of like "make love, not war", but related to shaving; barba=beard), and there's even a #barbaday on Twitter to celebrate it. I'm 100% pro facial hair.

[Stevieboy]

LOL!!! Thanks Mick, but I don't know about Yoda. Steve's primary motivation for traveling to Quilla is "entreprenueral" so I'm just putting him in contact with some folks I know that can help him out. If we happen to encounter a few single, attractive young ladies that admire our rugged good looks and boyish charm, it will be purely by coincidence.

No, by all means please don't let us meet women only by coincidence. I hope you were joking.
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@Vman_ Ok,  I didn't know motels there were usually for that and by the hour. Here too depending where you are. So, even novios go to motels? Oh, yeah, you mentioned people live at home for many adult years. Same thing in Mexico. The girls live at home until they're married. 
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Yeah, Benjio's right I'm going for entreprenueral reasons, but that's for three reasons:
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 1. To finance future trips
 2.  In case I don't meet women or woman, psycologically, my trip wasn't in vain.
 3. New business venture
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Hope Benjio doesn't feel too much pressure from all the talk of our trip. I'm sure he also hopes I'm a decent wingman and work the field as a team. I don't know why, but I envision a bar on a beach with palm leaved roof, a dark short chubby bartender, us guys in hawaiian shirts with a bunch of little asian chicks in bikinis dancing and swooning over us. What movie was that? Why arent the girls in the vision latin? Maybe too many war movies.     

[benjio]

No, by all means please don't let us meet women only by coincidence. I hope you were joking.  

I'm setting some things up from this end. What I previously told you about our plans for that Saturday is pretty much a sure thing. Can't ever promise on delivery with Costeñas but usually when you mention "la rumba" or hanging out to have a few drinks they show up. Most are still as flaky as breakfast biscuits though. I already told you I'm going to be a little all over the place. I'm meeting with some real estate agents the first day there to view a couple of properties and we'll hang out with some friends that weekend. But the following week I'll be wheelin' and dealin' with the occasional date here and there should any of the girls I'm interested in at Jamie's agree to meet me.
 
The only thing I can guarantee is you'll probably be bored sometimes. There's always the option of just approaching women on the fly though. You'd be surprised where you can end up at 11 p.m. after walking up to a girl and introducing yourself at 11 a.m. in Barranquilla. I'll give you and whoever else is interested some advice The FamousWingMan from Gringos.com gave me during my second trip:
 
"If you're at a club or bar and you see a group of women approach the ugliest one. Ask her to dance, buy her drinks, pay attention to her all night. You will have already established youself as a cool guy so no one in the group will feel threatened by you being around. But eventually the hotter friends won't be able to deal with not being the center of attention and they'll usually do anything to shift your focus towards them. After that it's all milk and cookies."
 
LOL!! I'm obviously just kidding but only halfway. That little tidbit of advice has yet to fail from my experience.
 

I don't know why, but I envision a bar on a beach with palm leaved roof, a dark short chubby bartender, us guys in hawaiian shirts with a bunch of little asian chicks in bikinis dancing and swooning over us. What movie was that? Why arent the girls in the vision latin? Maybe too many war movies.   

THIS I can make this happen. I know a great little spot in Salgar on Kilimanjaro Beach (awesome whale watching spot during the right time of year by the way) that is just as you described. Great food too, but oddly it's a little difficult to find Asian chicks in Bikinis in Northern Colombia. That my friend is for your next trip. Rio de Janeiro.
 
I'm looking forward to it though. Should be interesting if nothing else.

[Stevieboy]

"If you're at a club or bar and you see a group of women approach the ugliest one. Ask her to dance, buy her drinks, pay attention to her all night. You will have already established youself as a cool guy so no one in the group will feel threatened by you being around. But eventually the hotter friends won't be able to deal with not being the center of attention and they'll usually do anything to shift your focus towards them. After that it's all milk and cookies."
 

Now THAT, I've done a few times here with me doing the same thing except I still wound up with the ugly one.     

[Stevieboy]

 
The only thing I can guarantee is you'll probably be bored sometimes. 

I'm not worried. I've been wanting to do this for a long time and expect to spend money to keep me from being bored. I'm sure the first night we go out if I make friends with a girl, I can probably coax her into being my tour guide during the week. What girl wouldn't want to acompany a fun American guy who's paying for the day?
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When I was in Panama, I befriended a taxi driver, and this guy took me everywhere I wanted to explore. For 50 bucks he was my tour guide for the day inlcuding ride, and I even paid for lunch and a few beers. He also took me to Roberto Duran's statue and took a picture of me with it. I was glad to have him.  Then, another night a girl I met took me to Isla Perico by the canal and that was cool. Oddly enough, if she's unemployed, my chances of hanging out with her more often are better.       

[Gato4Astrid]

If you want to look for Bates Motel, then you are in the wrong country 


Yes, V-Man is correct about "Motel" in Colombia is very different!!!  Pay by the hour. 

[Stevieboy]

 
Hey Vman, or anyone else with experience, you mentioned learning their customs before going by going online? Well, I v'e been doing that on latin cupid, and although I receive 5 likes a day, (mostly from the DR), they hardly ever reply. So, they tease, and then they dont follow thru. Ity's true their flaky. I think some of these girls are also professional while others just flirt. I assume they dont have access to the internet or have a laptop on the comfort of their couch, so I would think they would reply at first chance. When and if they do reply they'll give me their email and then they're still flaky. I'm trying to meet someone online before I get there to raise my odds, but noticed not too many girls from BAR are active on latin cupid. Any tricks or advice? Should I say I'm going to BAR on my profile?     

[mambocowboy]

If you try colombian cupid there are likely to be more women from BAQ than LACupid

[Stevieboy]

If you try colombian cupid there are likely to be more women from BAQ than LACupid

Huh? I didn't know there was a difference between latin american cupid and colombian cupid. I'll check it out thanks.. 

[benjio]

Cowboy's correct. Colombian Cupid is a much better option if you're focusing your search in any Colombian City...especially Barranquilla. I feel your pain though. I've definitely been there. Women send you "likes" or short introductory messages, but when you try to follow up afterwards getting a response is rare. It's almost as if it's just a form of entertainment for them and meeting someone with the potential of starting a serious relationship is not a priority. I don't use Colombian Cupid anymore for that very reason. There were just too many months where I felt I was paying for absolutely nothing. I still eventually met quite a few women in person that I initially got in contact with through the site though. I found it made all the difference in the world when I told girls I was either currently in their cities or coming very soon. I just met a girl from Cartegena online that I plan on visiting in March (hopefully...let's not forget about the flakiness) and I'm almost 100% sure that's why she replied to my first message.

Another thing is I ask for their phone numbers immediately...usually in the very first message or reply. Waiting for them to go back to an internet cafe if they don't have a computer at home or waiting for them to actually put the effort into sending a message if they do usually doesn't work. But you can call them anytime. I've found most girls really enjoy talking over the phone and appreciate you calling them. Unlimited Cellular Minute Service Plans are now available in Colombia but they are very expensive. Most people still buy minutes only when they need to make a call. What that means is it's very rare that Colombian guys call girls just to talk...and even when they do the conversations are short, "how are things going" check up calls. Not a "tell me your life story and all your dreams" kind of deal. The average Colombiana is not use to getting that kind of attention so when they do it's really flattering. You can greatly increase your chances of getting them to actually meet you in person when you finally get down there when you've established that kind of comradery over the phone.

[mambocowboy]

SB, if you already know you're going to visit BAQ definitely put that in your profile. It'll distinguish you from all the guys who chat online and won't even commit to saying they'll visit...And transition from chatting to skype asap, as you'll get a much better sense of the lady that way...

[Stevieboy]

Ok thanks Ben, MC.
Since I paid for the other service, Ive literally gotten a chat and phone number whithin a couple minutes. I mean we didnt even have a conversation yet and she gave it to me. Yeah, very different form Latin cupid and way more women where I'm focusing. Hey MC, I'm definitely gonna put that I'm visitng in my profile, but I did that on the other cupid and this girl kind of accused me of being a player. She's smart   
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@Ben. Well I guess I'll focus on the best ones. I don't think I have enough time to go on that many dates. If I can, solidify two or three meetups? What do you think? As for phones, I'm thinking unlocking my cell phone to use a sim card from there, or just buy a phone there. I still have one from Panama. Verizon charges me 49 cents a minute to call Panama, but I think Colombia is more.   

[V_Man]

I only used Colombian Cupid. I never really had the problems you are talking about. HOWEVER these sites are always a numbers game. I wrote a first standard letter to many women - just personalising it a little bit. The ones that responded I got to chat online or to Skype asap. If by that stage they still had not given me their phone number and email, then I asked for it. They always gave it. If not, I'd say they are wasting your time. Perhaps they are not ready for a relationship. Who knows? I had so many to communicate with I had to cut down the list real fast anyway.

As has already been said, saying you are comming within x weeks immedaitely puts you up the list in their attentions.

I have since talked to some of these women about this. The vast majority of the guys that write to them are one of: never going to get on a plane, players or too old. If you tell them you already have your plane tickets and you meet their basic criteria then all they need to figure out is if you are a player or not. Hence you are worth the effort.

Don't take your phone. Buy the cheapest phone you can find when you land there. It will cost you about $40.

[Stevieboy]

I only used Colombian Cupid. I never really had the problems you are talking about. HOWEVER these sites are always a numbers game. I wrote a first standard letter to many women - just personalising it a little bit. The ones that responded I got to chat online or to Skype asap. If by that stage they still had not given me their phone number and email, then I asked for it. They always gave it. If not, I'd say they are wasting your time. Perhaps they are not ready for a relationship. Who knows? I had so many to communicate with I had to cut down the list real fast anyway.

As has already been said, saying you are comming within x weeks immedaitely puts you up the list in their attentions.

I have since talked to some of these women about this. The vast majority of the guys that write to them are one of: never going to get on a plane, players or too old. If you tell them you already have your plane tickets and you meet their basic criteria then all they need to figure out is if you are a player or not. Hence you are worth the effort.

Don't take your phone. Buy the cheapest phone you can find when you land there. It will cost you about $40.

Yeah, last night I was on the phone with two girls. I had technical issues with one of them because she wasnt in BQ and the number wouldnt work until she gave me her land line. There's also a third girl I haven't called yet and she's been mssging me to. They ALL have skype so I opened an acct, but hadn't shaved, showered, nor cleaned my place and didnt want to make a bad impression. I use Verizon for calls and they charge 22 c a minute for cells and 17 c for landlines. Not too bad considering. I guess I'll leave my phone as you mentioned.   
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I can already tell I need to concentrate only on the 4 star candidates and just a few, but it's very hard. I was online and on the phone too long last night talking. Some of these girls don't work the next day and they demanded attention. WHAT? I never get that here. My screen would light up with several chat requests and I would find myself answering or saying something to the wrong person. It was cool but knew right away it'd be a problem since I still have to work and do day to day chores. I'm self employed and office out of my home, thus can easily be distracted with the lure of the girls instead of working. I'm sure many here are laughing because they were in my shoes. This all happened the first night I went to colombian cupid. For anyone that hasn't tried, this is definitely the site you want if lokking in Col.
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YEs, they know I'm coming as it says on my profile. I think they know other girls are looking at my profile too, so some were quick to give me their number. I've done online dating here in the States and I've NEVER been given a number this quick.