Partying and having fun in SA as a non-twentysomething... different than the US?

[TheGreatAdventurer]

Hi all,

Was just thinking about this...  it seems that here in the US when you're in your 30s or 40s or older, and you go out to a club or all-night party type of venue, depending on what you look like and how you act, you might be viewed by the early-20's crowd like a "creepy old guy" who shouldn't be out partying.  It doesn't really happen to me because I'm one of the most outgoing people I know with complete strangers and I have no problem hitting the dance floor, even by myself.  Plus with my long hair, personality, and physique I strike people as being younger than mid-30s.  But time catches up with everyone, so I'm wondering how this kind of thing plays out in South America?

Does the younger crowd view older guys as "creepers" if they hit up a dance club or an all-night venue in Brazil or Colombia?  I'm really into Trance and other Electronic dance music, hell, I've never been to a rave but STILL want to experience one before the end, but just wondering how this age dynamic works outside of the US/west.

I'm guessing a city like Rio, for example, would have all sorts of venues where all ages come out to play... but as of yet it is, of course, just a guess.   

Thoughts?

[Zon]

Are you [snip]ting me!?!?


Just go to Cali; great party and electronic scene - reggeaton too! 


As long as you do the most you can with what you got - weight, fashion, style, manners PLUS a little Spanish - you will feel much younger.  You will have no problem fitting in.


Careful!  The hard part is finding a balance in the land of plenty ...

[TheGreatAdventurer]

 

Thanks Zon... I like the sound of that!! 

Do you find a lot of women down there are into electronica, or at least will get into it once you introduce it to them?

[Zon]

Dude!  are you [snip]ting me dos ...


do you know any Spanish yet. es muy importa? 


pm me or Calipro ... and grab your ball sack and pull .

[TheGreatAdventurer]

lol... si ahorita estoy aprendando mucho espanol (y portuges tambien) y antes de salindo quiero saber bastante.  No entiendo que esta usted diciendo sobre mis pelotas jajaja... que loco.

No se preocupa porque voy a salir en mas que dos anos.  Tengo mucho tiempo aprendar.

[Zon]

perfect!  That is about a ton more that I had when I started:)


I think Cali is the best party city within 7 hours air flight from me.   There may be some places in this hemisphere that compare?  BA, Argentina ... but, for ease and abundance and vibe - CALI is amazing.   


Medellin does not hold a candle IF YOU REALLY LIKE MUSIC AND DANCE.  Sure, it is hip and upper class.  But it lacks the vibe big time.

[bcc_1_2]

Man everyone on here says yea I am this age... but I really look this age. We are who we are... old... young... attractive... not so attractive... whatever... partying is better in every latin america country I've been to.
I would caution about Bazil just because for whatever reason people think the country is much safer than the statistics actually suggest (maybe because they won the olympic bid or something). That and they also speak portuguese.  I have always avoided Argentina because everyone says it can be really a expensive place. And part of the fun of latin america is that things cost less. From a guy who visited Cali... I think the women are beautiful... very few know much English... and the city is a big [snip]hole. For just having fun with party girls/prepagos or whatever I'm certain Cali fits the bill.
Maybe decide on what look you are like with women and then pick a city.

[fathertime]

Man everyone on here says yea I am this age... but I really look this age. We are who we are... old... young... attractive... not so attractive... whatever.. 

it usually worth  a good eye roll when somebody starts talking about how good they look or how young they look...save it for the ladies!   


Fathertime!   

[TheGreatAdventurer]

The only reason I said that is because in the US, if you party and look older than mid-20s, the younger crowd treats you like an outcast.  Since this topic is about how the younger crowd treats older people who party in Latin America, it was brought up as an integral point for this discussion.  It wasn't meant as a boast. 

[V_Man]

Just to add what people have said about Cali. Parties in Colombia (and I assume Brazil as well) are more lively. People dance. It's normal and expected. And I mean everybody. So if you are at a family event (hard to avoid them) then everyone from toddlers to grandad will dance at least a little. So you already have that difference in starting points. Then when you go to a night club.... Well you will go with a group and dance with that group. The important thing is to have a good time. So peoples attitudes are already different. Then when you go to Cali. Well dancing is in everyone's blood. Man! in Cali in the night club even the guy in a wheel chair was on the dance floor. I swear.

[Zon]

it usually worth  a good eye roll when somebody starts talking about how good they look or how young they look...save it for the ladies!

WHY!  Some people are.  Some people are not.  Some people think they are, and that is enough for it to be so. 


And, before you bounce on me for being cocky (in my opinion simply a proponent for being bold and confident - doing the most you can with what you got) ... I did not have what it took with the woman I really wanted.  So, I am fully aware of my limitations.  I could not get the ONE I wanted.  ( I might try again)   But, I can still get a couple 100,000 of the ones that are very acceptable:)


Still a work in progress.

[fathertime]

WHY!  Some people are.  Some people are not.  Some people think they are, and that is enough for it to be so. 


And, before you bounce on me for being cocky (in my opinion simply a proponent for being bold and confident - doing the most you can with what you got) ... I did not have what it took with the woman I really wanted.  So, I am fully aware of my limitations.  I could not get the ONE I wanted.  ( I might try again)   But, I can still get a couple 100,000 of the ones that are very acceptable:)


Still a work in progress.

1.  i have read many times people stating how they look much younger than their years. when i've met them, without exception that has NOT been the case.  People can look good for their age, but I haven't witnessed a person looking 10 years younger than they actually are.  I think people are not good judges of themselves when it comes to how they look.  If a man is going off of what the ladies are telling him, well that is a joke also.  Ladies say all sorts of silly things, and they can also pick up on if a man is trying to act/look young and they naturally compliment him in that regard for his ego. 


2.  It wan't your near 50 years (and looking it)  that doomed your relationship.  From what you posted it wassomething else. 

3.  When I received those photos you sent with the last lady, I gotta tell you, I looked at the lady (cute) but I did notice you also.  You looked your age.  I'm sure you are not bad looking but you look your years in that weathered face! 

4.  Overall, It seems silly for a man to talk about how young 'he looks'.  Other men usually roll their eyes at it and the ladies just think you are overly vain.  I think there are better ways to be 'cocky'.

Fathertime! 

[TheGreatAdventurer]

Well regardless, I act like a 21 year old... I guess that's all that counts!

[robert angel]

I think a lot of it all depends on how you carry yourself. Once in a while, my wife and I will go out and do the 'club scene'--dancing and just taking in all the action. We find out which dance clubs are hottest at the time and 'paint the town red'. It's fun once in a while, but would get old fast if we did it more than every 3 or 4 months or so. We live in a city with if not the biggest, certainly one of the biggest art colleges in the world, with students from over 50 nations, so you never know what you're going to see. I don't think they've run out of novel new body parts to pierce for example.
 
We have fun, get a lot of looks and smiles when out on the dance floor and find it sort of funny that if either one of us hits the rest room, we both (especially HER) get 'hit on' a bit. If we strike up an extended conversation with another couple or group, someone might say my wife's pretty and nicely inquire as to what her nationality is, because some find her mixture of looks a bit hard to place. But by and large, everybody we run into (literally and figuratively) has been nice.
 
There are a lot of 'stylin', edgy people out and about, but we've never gotten any weird looks. I don't dress 'emo' or anything--I try and look sharp, yet appropriate for my age, although I usually let my wife have final decision on what she thinks looks 'just right' in terms of dress. She usually re irons a few sets of clothes so they look fresh and we pick from that. I typically  keep it simple--maybe a luxe cotton t shirt, some not too tight pants and some sharp shoes--the shoes do make a difference.
 
Maybe my wife will put on a little red lipstick and wear slight heels, but she's so modest that by the time we hit a club (after midnight) she's already dabbed her lips several times with tissue to tone down the lipstick. We have our fun for 2 or 3 hours, get breakfast, head on home, continue in the mood and when we finally do sleep, we sleep til lunch.
 
Dates like that and out of town trips keep it fresh and even if I do start getting the "What's grandpa doing here?" looks someday, I'll probably keep doing it if we still enjoy it. After all, it's about 'us'--not 'them'. We knew that given our difference in age, especially given the fact that everyone thinks she definitely looks ten years younger than her actual age, that we'd probably catch some flack, but we've really been amazed at how few stares and comments we've received. Maybe the place where the vibe is the weirdest and rarely even there, is Disney World--go figure...
 

[Zon]

Worthy points to talk about.  Maybe 5 - 7 years ago, I was quicker to justify anything because I wanted not only to be younger ... but, I wanted to possess younger women.  I can see that more clearly now than back then.  I have a little more experience now.

I too agree that men ought not say, "I look 10 years younger than my age." Men should not try to be pretty either:)  We should only do the most we can with what we got, and then rely on the goodness, or generosity, or stupidity of women to do the rest.

Now, I have to say ... that girl in Ukraine threw me like I did not think I could be thrown.   I am somehow "humbled" as a result - kinda.  But, it has been a couple months now, I have stopped thinking about her 50 times a day.   And, remarkably, I have started dating women in the USA!  And, the girls I have been with have been just about as young and as attractive as the girl from Ukraine. (well, that is not entirely true.  I thought she was a absolute Goddess).  I am as surprised to write this as you may be to read this.

My point is that its not about age.  It is about attitude.  who you are as a man that dictates what kind of women accept you.  It is easy to date attractive women ANYWHERE in the world, if you have the right attitude (a serious relationship / marriage ... that is more complicated)

Just for [snip]sandgiggles Here is one of the photos I shared with my friend FT.   You can see why I have a softspot for Russian / Eastern European women?

[robert angel]

I'd like to think that most of the guys here on both sides of the board aren't overly concerned about what other people back home think about their choices in relationships and marriage. Nor are they as concerned as the 'girls in the office around the water cooler' set are about age differences.
 
Even when I was a kid, when I found myself on the outside looking in at things like social cliques and so on, I was able to say to myself "f___ em all, I'm fine and that's what really counts". I never cared a great deal about 'social conventions'. I lived in a lot of different places and saw the same games being played by the same types of people, only the locations being different. As long as somebody wasn't busting my chops, I was fine with 'live and let live'.
 
We don't catch flack about our marriage, but I'm pretty sure that if we did, we'd embrace the same mindset I occasionally used as a kid and we'd pull closer together, rather than let others rattle us apart. If it doesn't work out, I'd like to think the blame would be between us, not because of some group of 'them'.
 
If us fellows were so worried about it, we wouldn't be taking chances, along with long, expensive trips, to exotic countries and bringing back such exquisite souvenirs!

[braziliangirl]

I would caution about Bazil just because for whatever reason people think the country is much safer than the statistics actually suggest (maybe because they won the olympic bid or something).

I agree. (Although I don't know if it's much more dangerous than Colombia...)

I have always avoided Argentina because everyone says it can be really a expensive place.

That was before the 90s. Now it's really cheap over there. Super safe for SA standards, great restaurants, greats hotels, a lot of things to see and do...

[fathertime]

Worthy points to talk about.  Maybe 5 - 7 years ago, I was quicker to justify anything because I wanted not only to be younger ... but, I wanted to possess younger women.  I can see that more clearly now than back then.  I have a little more experience now.

I too agree that men ought not say, "I look 10 years younger than my age." Men should not try to be pretty either:)  We should only do the most we can with what we got, and then rely on the goodness, or generosity, or stupidity of women to do the rest.

Now, I have to say ... that girl in Ukraine threw me like I did not think I could be thrown.   I am somehow "humbled" as a result - kinda.  But, it has been a couple months now, I have stopped thinking about her 50 times a day.   And, remarkably, I have started dating women in the USA!  And, the girls I have been with have been just about as young and as attractive as the girl from Ukraine. (well, that is not entirely true.  I thought she was a absolute Goddess).  I am as surprised to write this as you may be to read this.

My point is that its not about age.  It is about attitude.  who you are as a man that dictates what kind of women accept you.  It is easy to date attractive women ANYWHERE in the world, if you have the right attitude (a serious relationship / marriage ... that is more complicated)

Just for [snip]sandgiggles Here is one of the photos I shared with my friend FT.   You can see why I have a softspot for Russian / Eastern European women?

that is a good photo zonnyboy!
you and your lady of interest look a lot alike actually... i'm sure it is not too late to give it another go if you really want to.  you have time and money so if she is still on your mind you should damn conventional wisdom and make another trip...and beg if necessary! 


Fathertime!     

[fathertime]

I think a lot of it all depends on how you carry yourself. Once in a while, my wife and I will go out and do the 'club scene'--dancing and just taking in all the action. We find out which dance clubs are hottest at the time and 'paint the town red'. It's fun once in a while, but would get old fast if we did it more than every 3 or 4 months or so. We live in a city with if not the biggest, certainly one of the biggest art colleges in the world, with students from over 50 nations, so you never know what you're going to see. I don't think they've run out of novel new body parts to pierce for example.
 
We have fun, get a lot of looks and smiles when out on the dance floor and find it sort of funny that if either one of us hits the rest room, we both (especially HER) get 'hit on' a bit. If we strike up an extended conversation with another couple or group, someone might say my wife's pretty and nicely inquire as to what her nationality is, because some find her mixture of looks a bit hard to place. But by and large, everybody we run into (literally and figuratively) has been nice.
 
There are a lot of 'stylin', edgy people out and about, but we've never gotten any weird looks. I don't dress 'emo' or anything--I try and look sharp, yet appropriate for my age, although I usually let my wife have final decision on what she thinks looks 'just right' in terms of dress. She usually re irons a few sets of clothes so they look fresh and we pick from that. I typically  keep it simple--maybe a luxe cotton t shirt, some not too tight pants and some sharp shoes--the shoes do make a difference.
 
Maybe my wife will put on a little red lipstick and wear slight heels, but she's so modest that by the time we hit a club (after midnight) she's already dabbed her lips several times with tissue to tone down the lipstick. We have our fun for 2 or 3 hours, get breakfast, head on home, continue in the mood and when we finally do sleep, we sleep til lunch.
 
Dates like that and out of town trips keep it fresh and even if I do start getting the "What's grandpa doing here?" looks someday, I'll probably keep doing it if we still enjoy it. After all, it's about 'us'--not 'them'. We knew that given our difference in age, especially given the fact that everyone thinks she definitely looks ten years younger than her actual age, that we'd probably catch some flack, but we've really been amazed at how few stares and comments we've received. Maybe the place where the vibe is the weirdest and rarely even there, is Disney World--go figure...

I'd like to think that most of the guys here on both sides of the board aren't overly concerned about what other people back home think about their choices in relationships and marriage. Nor are they as concerned as the 'girls in the office around the water cooler' set are about age differences.
 
Even when I was a kid, when I found myself on the outside looking in at things like social cliques and so on, I was able to say to myself "f___ em all, I'm fine and that's what really counts". I never cared a great deal about 'social conventions'. I lived in a lot of different places and saw the same games being played by the same types of people, only the locations being different. As long as somebody wasn't busting my chops, I was fine with 'live and let live'.
 
We don't catch flack about our marriage, but I'm pretty sure that if we did, we'd embrace the same mindset I occasionally used as a kid and we'd pull closer together, rather than let others rattle us apart. If it doesn't work out, I'd like to think the blame would be between us, not because of some group of 'them'.
 
If us fellows were so worried about it, we wouldn't be taking chances, along with long, expensive trips, to exotic countries and bringing back such exquisite souvenirs!

the general attitude of these posts seems to be the winning attitude after you bring your lady here from parts unknown.  i would say if you are in the process of finding/bringing a woman here, these are good posts to read and incorporate the same sort of attitude.


Fathertime!   

[Kiltboy1]

that is a good photo zonnyboy!
you and your lady of interest look a lot alike actually... i'm sure it is not too late to give it another go if you really want to.  you have time and money so if she is still on your mind you should damn conventional wisdom and make another trip...and beg if necessary! 


Fathertime!   
 
I agree Zonster
 
I would go back and take one last shot so you will never regret it later in life.
I am not into Eastern Euro women, but if I were, she would be on my short list for sure. 

KB

[Zon]

=====
that is a good photo zonnyboy!
you and your lady of interest look a lot alike actually... i'm sure it is not too late to give it another go if you really want to.  you have time and money so if she is still on your mind you should damn conventional wisdom and make another trip...and beg if necessary!   Fathertime!   
 
I agree Zonster
 
I would go back and take one last shot so you will never regret it later in life.
I am not into Eastern Euro women, but if I were, she would be on my short list for sure.   
=======

Yep ... I know.  But, I have a problem with her.  I apparently like her more than she likes me. (or, she has issues, concerns, founded, or otherwise.  Let's be honest - they are founded:)

I do not have a short list.  I have an only list - and she is the only one.  IS THAT ABSOLUTELY PATHETIC!!! 

Before I see her again, I will materially have a completely different income source and future.  I think that is wise to complete before I take on some difficult issues. If she is still available ... if I still feel the way I did / do ...  Then ...  GULP Then, I would happily join the ranks of you old married farts.  But, it has to be right, true, dignified.   

I am not sure if begging strikes quite the right tone:)

[Calipro]

I do not have a short list.  I have an only list - and she is the only one.  IS THAT ABSOLUTELY PATHETIC!!! 

Before I see her again, I will materially have a completely different income source and future.  I think that is wise to complete before I take on some difficult issues. If she is still available ... if I still feel the way I did / do ...  Then ...  GULP Then, I would happily join the ranks of you old married farts.  But, it has to be right, true, dignified.   

I am not sure if begging strikes quite the right tone:)

If I thought like that.....I would have died from a broken heart years ago or hit one of my ex-wives in the head with an ax when she tried to leave. jajaja


Once you have convinced yourself that only one women in this world can make you a truly happy man......you are doomed.


My advice is....start changing your mind..... instead of trying to change the world.

[Zon]

My advice is....start changing your mind..... instead of trying to change the world.

HAHAHAHA   I understand. 


A couple of weeks ago, I was in a pretty interesting situation with some very very very sexy women (not porn stars.  pinup models) late at night in a Jacuzzi.  All I did was dance (Calipro! you know how that looks:)   But, I was happy only to TALK ABOUT "I" - that's when I knew I had a little problem. 


So, I will try to change my mine AND the world, until I succeed in changing one.

[Calipro]

 All I did was dance (Calipro! you know how that looks:)   But, I was happy only to TALK ABOUT "I" - that's when I knew I had a little problem. 

Yeah....I don't think you are going to win over too many women in public clubs with your dancing abilities...but at least all the chicks at the house parties know who you are. jajaja


I some how got bumped out of Jim's penthouse....must be some really good friend he has coming to town. But it also brings up the possibility of a really good party....that you are going to miss.


I'll try to take some really good pics so you can stop thinking about the ONE for a moment or two. jajaja

[robert angel]

I don't know Zon. Sounds like you're really stuck on this dame like no other gal--can't recall you ever remotely acting like--expressing how you feel, in this manner. That in and of itself isn't bad, but it sounds like it's pretty one sided and yet you're trying to muster up the energy to put into play a winning strategy to change her mind and win her heart. Remember how Napoleon (to name but one guy) ended up after venturing into Russia!
 
She's heavenly to look at for sure--she looks extremely atractive, intelligent and I'll bet she's intuitive and calculating as well. As we used to say--she's a "Stone Fox" alright---she looks hot, hot--but I'll bet those baby blues can go from laser hot to artic ice in a heart beat.
 
I have seen it myself and seen a whole lot of guys get totally 'into' women from this part of the world---smart, sharp guys like you, and almost to a one, it's ended up being disasterous. I wonder if you're not subconciously setting yourself up for some kind of beating in some sort of odd manner, to atone for things in your past, but I don't think you deserve the kind of shellacking you're probably setting yourself up for.
 
Unlike some folks, I never saw you as being unsavory in any way and you have as much right as any guy to find happiness with a woman--I don't care if you've got fifty ONE shades of grey on you or whatever!
 
I just think you're playing around with an awfully bright, hot flame here and that maybe you ought to regroup, take a cold shower, dry off and step back out into the warm sunshine with an open mind, a mind for searching new environs near, far and inbetween.
 
Hey--not telling you how to live your life or exactly what to do, but I don't see a happy ending on this one and I'd hate to see you get burned. Just my 75 cents on all this...